Except for making some things blind items, I have left it entirely in the words of the tipster.
I was invited to spend time this past Memorial weekend hanging out with this animator/writer/illustrator/one hit wonder (#1) who had a short lived series on this almost network several years ago. The show attracted a significant cult following when it aired on (#2) and this person still has a strong fan base within his subsection of pop culture. To this day, he never appears out in public where he might be recognized or allows any photos to be taken without wearing his signature disguise that he’s worn since the inception of his show. (He didn’t wear it Memorial weekend when out with me. I completely didn’t recognize him when I first saw him.) Everything online, including his Wikipedia bio, is fake and written by him. He will do anything and everything to keep people from knowing any personal info about him. He desperately attempts to project his age much younger than his 54 years and while his real first name is very close to his fake persona, his last name is not.
To say that he is a horribly racist individual doesn’t even begin to scratch the surface of his deep seated racism. A very nice and genuine friend of his that I met last year, he refers to as, “that rich Jew”. He believes everyone in the Little Armenia section of LA hates white people. He was upset that his neighborhood is being “invaded by Mexicans”. A kind friend of his, who happens to manage a very popular bar, graciously let us cut to the front of the line to get in because he was getting angrier and angrier at having to wait. When talking about his friend that got us in the bar, he continually made disparaging comments about the fact that the guy only dates black men. He repeatedly said throughout the weekend that he doesn’t like inviting this person to his house for parties because he brings a boyfriend and hates having black people in his house.
He texted me Sunday afternoon and inquired about lunch and thrift shopping (something we have in common). I said sure and hoped that Saturday’s deplorable behavior was just due to having an off day. Nope. As soon as I picked him up, he was in a horrid mood. When I called him out on it, he said that he could just not talk to me at all (tempting but awkward). He asked what I had done all morning. I told him the fun I had and the great places in LA I visited. He laughed and said he thought I was probably sitting in my hotel room waiting for him to call. (Pro tip: when in LA be sure to visit the immersive art exhibit at Cakeland LA.) I suggested we eat lunch at El Coyote. I had always wanted to eat there. He got more irate and asked who I thought I was that I could pick where we ate. Not wanting to argue with someone with the temperament of a four year old, I let him pick lunch. While waiting for our food he asks me who I think is gay in LA. (I’ve been an avid reader of CDAN for over a decade; I know my Hollywood gays.) First name that comes to mind is the mogul (#3). He says he’s heard that #3 might be gay. Next up on my list is the talk show host/game show creator (#4)’s ex boy toy, (#5). He says that he has met #5 numerous times and there is no way he can be gay because he is so nice and gives back to the community. (That may be true but Helen Keller could tell #5 is gay.) I tell him I’ve always thought this A+ list mostly movie actor (#6) was gay. He replied with the antiquated and false notion that #6 can’t be gay because he’s married with kids. He wasn’t joking. He actually believes this! While we were dining outside, he randomly starts yelling at me out of nowhere. People stopped eating and were staring until I told him to calm down because someone was going to call the police on him. His ability to go from zero to unhinged, screaming rage is only surpassed in speed by JLo’s ability to call the paps when lunching with Ben.
After lunch, we went thrift shopping. The first spot we hit, he found a book he wanted to buy. It was $2.75. At the counter, when told the price, he said he didn’t have any cash. I stepped up and paid for the book. As soon as I got outside, I was berated for paying for the book. He said he had cash and he told the sales clerk he didn’t to see if he could get the book for less money. It was $2.75. The money was going to a charitable organization! He literally complained about everything, including his constant inability, due to his size, to easily get out of my rental car, a Ford Mustang. He argued that getting out of my own car, a Mini Cooper, would be much easier. (No way.)
After I dropped him off at home, I had a delightful dinner at El Coyote. I decided that there was no way I could spend another nanosecond with him. Life is too short to waste time with someone like this. I used my points on Southwest to fly to CA. To change my flight to an earlier one would have cost me over 28,000 points. I called Southwest and asked if I could please change my flight and not be charged the additional points. The customer service rep said she would need a reason to tell her supervisor why an exception should be made. I told her who I spent my weekend with and what had transpired. Southwest allowed me to change my flight without using any of my points; even they realized what an ass he is. I do feel sorry for his long suffering partner and the unmitigated nightmare it must be to live with him. He’s looking to restart his career with another series. Miraculously, he got a pitch meeting with some executives at Amazon. To the surprise of no one but himself, there was never a second meeting. This man is a vile, narcissistic human being.
#1 - Angus Oblong
#2 - "Adult Swim"
#3 - David Geffen
#4 - Merv Griffin
#5 - Ryan Seacrest
#6 - George Clooney
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