January 13, 2020
With the news today, the A-/B+ list mostly movie actress can breathe a sigh of relief. No more fake relationship required. I'm sure there will be a quietly split kind of announcement in the next couple of weeks.
Rosario Dawson/Cory Booker
With the news today, the A-/B+ list mostly movie actress can breathe a sigh of relief. No more fake relationship required. I'm sure there will be a quietly split kind of announcement in the next couple of weeks.
Rosario Dawson/Cory Booker
Poor Spartacus. He sure is going to miss his boo :)
ReplyDeleteEh, she wouldn't have been the first First Beard.
ReplyDeleteYeah she's free.....so is he !
ReplyDeleteFOLLOWING IS A COPY OF MY POST IN THE OTHER THREAD
ReplyDeleteI'm going to write a book for these Hollywood people on how to act straight and passionately in love when you're in a bearding contract. My first line advice is to just forget the bearding contract and come out. But, in case the individual is determined to dig in at the back of that closet, here is an excerpt from my upcoming book:
1. Don't say you are "fond of" the woman who is supposed to be your girlfriend. No straight man talks like that about a woman that he's into. Ever!
2. Learn how to hold a woman, and how to lead in social situations. Holding her hand is not going to cut it. And your hug enclosure should be around her waist, not around her shoulders. When you cuddle the woman while sitting, that is the only time your arm goes over and around her shoulder and you're holding her close to your chest and making frequent eye contact with ear whispering and giggles and gentle lip and neck peckings.
3. Learn how to kiss a woman. You will need to practice this in private first. Please do not kiss your girlfriend who you are madly in love with like a porn actor kisses his porn actress counterpart. Do not kiss the woman's hand (unless less she happens to be the Queen of England), do not kiss her cheek. Pull her up close and kiss directly on the lips---not pressing lips together like 1950s Hollywood movie stars doing a love scene, but open lips and with tongue. That is how you make it look authentic.
4. Hire somebody to take 'secret' photos of the two of you having fun out together then 'leak' the photos on the internet yourself.
5. Buy an fake 'expensive' engagement ring with a large (glass) 'diamond', and be sure to have her photographed wearing it. No one will know its fake. Just pretend to not want to talk about it. If asked any questions just say you haven't set a date yet and that you are not in a hurry.
6. Okay, if you're going to pretend to be a straight man you need to reform your actions, activities, and vocabulary. The first rule about this is that straight men do not act all flamboyant and like a bitch as Corey Booker does. See Appendix A at the back of the book for new words for your vocabulary, and words to be eliminated from your vocabulary.
7. Even if you've never done it, learn how to man-spread when you're sitting and do it often. And do not EVER sit with your legs crossed.
8. Bulge. Wear shorts under modern-fit pants and bulge to one side like in the old days. Act like you're not aware of it. Scientific studies have been done about this. Women look!
9. Be photographed at sports events like NFL, UFC, or NBA. Not bitch events like the opera and ice skating.
Sorry, but for more tips you gonna have to buy the book.
Man !
DeleteYou should be teaching College!!!
Do you have a hyper-successful PR firm or something?!
How much for using this elsewhere?
Good list!
DeleteThey're probably all too stupid to understand and follow your simple instructions, but A+ for your attempt to sort them out!
Watching Cory Booker was downright traumatic, it was so gross.
If they separate, there is no hope left for true love in this world! We might as well start WW3 and get it all over with!
ReplyDeleteI guess Enty "officially" broke them up yesterday. So now they can just go lead separate lives again until they decide to tell the world they broke up.
ReplyDeleteJohn Doe - some famous people have been bearding for decades and still don't get it right, you should start a consultancy.
ReplyDeleteJohn Doe.......let us know when your book comes out. Don't need the tips but you can write!!!!!
ReplyDeleteI'm confused. Was Rosario tricked or forced to beard for Cory? No? Did she wake up one morning to find men with sunglasses and earpieces, telling her she was now Cory's girlfriend? No? Did she give up other work to be his beard? No? So this is just a way to recycle the original "Rosario is bearding for Cory" blind. Got it.
ReplyDeleteCory's best moment was in the vagina tent during fashion week with his earlier beard... https://nyppagesix.files.wordpress.com/2017/09/843927334.jpg?quality=90&strip=all&w=1286
ReplyDeleteWow ... I'm kinda impressed he thought to carry off the charade in a menstro tent.
ReplyDeleteA personal pan size vag hat's sufficient to render a hetero, even, good as gay for me. Pussy pride's been a real assist to curbing my prurience. =)
Maybe now Cory can finally live openly with his partner T-Bone.
ReplyDelete@Miss, Unfortunately probably not, which is wrong. Tolerance should be demanded from all.
ReplyDeletehttps://theweek.com/speedreads/890881/cory-booker-used-cubby-impeachment-trial-incredibly-corny-joke
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_LGBT_African_Americans#Government_and_politics
Skull... omg. Comment of the year!
ReplyDeleteA personal pan size vag hat's sufficient to render a hetero, even, good as gay for me. Pussy pride's been a real assist to curbing my prurience. =)
re John Doe's book on how to act straight:
ReplyDeleteDoing many of his recommended displays of affection with your woman, in public, would more likely make others suspect the couple is "acting"---pretending to show their love, passion and heterosexuality. Why does he need to attend NFL games to look macho when he played football at Stanford?
@Oldfart,
ReplyDeleteRosario is already acting, so is Corey. But neither of them is fooling anybody because they are not very good at it. I've watched them posing together and they always look ill at ease and fake. People are laughing at them because they look silly. The way Corey is with her is not the way a man acts with his woman. And the way she responds to him is not the way women act when they're diggin' on a dude. Not that they need to be touchy-feely and slobbering all over each other all the time, as this also looks fake and ridiculous (here's lookin at you Nick and Priyanka---who by the way NEED a copy of my book), but their act needs a WHOLE lot more passion and polish. Just the way they talk about each other sounds unnatural and fake. Rosario is what she is, all she has to do is pretend to be in love. And IF she is as in love with him as she claims then she needs to showing more affection than that. But she's been recently seen with another man's tongue down her throat? Its Hollywood, but come on. And Corey needs a LOT more work. My book will teach him how to tighten up the act and throw off ALL gaydar. My book is not intended to teach them how to pretend. It will, however, help them learn how to pretend a whole lot better than they already doing...to smoothen out the rough edges and consistently deliver a flawless performance. Once they practice these things they will find that it all becomes second nature and that they don't have to work so much at 'acting' anymore.
And, to answer your last question...going to Stanford and playing football doesn't mean anything. Many football players are gay. The football itself isn't that relevant. What's relevant is that he appears to like to do things that most hetero dudes like to do. Remember, we are talking about beautiful (and believable) fake relationships here. Appearances and image are EVERYTHING in both Hollywood and DC. (I do also include some paragraphs for the non-public Wall Street/corporate types who secretly hire rent boys but will never come out for career reasons).
You will note that in my prologue I clearly said that my first recommendation is that people come of the closet and skip the bearding thing altogether. I do understand though that, for many, this is not an option. For these, I'm offering useful tips to help them pull it off. My tips are excellent. I discuss how to date, what to say, topics to talk about to always be interesting, how to pose, when and how to hook up with the correspondent, etc. I learned these things from years of observation and experience. I will have a chapter dedicated specially to yacht girls (and yacht guys, too). There will be a chapter on what should be included in the bearding contract. And there is even a chapter on how to get a life---for those who need the bearding to go on long term and include marriage and children and family life. I have been researching this book a long time. It will help many.
John Doe, you have been sorely sorely missed. Glad to see your comments. I have always enjoyed your input.
ReplyDeleteI will buy your book to help support to the cause @johndoe
ReplyDeleteMake Booker has a pact with Miss Lindsay Graham that they will comm out at the same time on the Senate floor.
ReplyDeleteI often confuse Rosario Dawson with Eva Mendes. That is on the rare occasion either one of them pops up on the screen.
ReplyDelete