This actress, who was in an earlier blind item was having a tough time defending her position of why she went and supported this disgraced comic at a recent show he put on. It took some shine off her always on luster.
@Longtimereader -- this still can be Aziz since he got a lot of heat for it and had to go into hiding for it. It wasn't sexual assault like CK but it was creepy and was riddled with coercion.
Coercion, by her own account, how many times did that woman willingly blow him? 2 times, maybe 3? According to her every time she got uncomfortable he stopped. Is begging now going to count as a sex crime?
@JT, Because they arranged to have a date after texting for a while, met at his apartment, went to a restaurant, had dinner, went back to his place, drank wine and started kissing and undressing each other in the kitchen. Her words.
How did CK sexually assault anyone? He asked permission to jerk off, then jerked off. If the broads didn't want him to, they could have said no or left.
I never said it was crime. I said it was creepy and coercive. He met a young fan after a show. She was star struck and wanted to spend time with someone she admires. If I was Aziz, I would have kicked her out and found a more willing participant. She was an adult and could have been more adamant about what her boundaries were, But I seriously doubt Aziz is naive about his celebrity status and what he can get young female fans to do with the right amount of pressure.
CK sexually harassed his coworkers. It's that easy. Aziz was romantically a pig and apparently not the sweet persona he put on for the screen and stage. Which is strange because he always seemed sleazy and fake to me, not sure what this woman was seeing.
Did Aziz force her into anything? Does a woman have agency or not? Are they strong and independent, or not? It’s pretty much a given if you’re going to his house you’re going to at least be steadily hit on with the goal of getting into your pants. How are there people out there that still don’t get this? If you don’t want to do it, either don’t go there in the first place or if you do go, and you aren’t happy with the situation, leave. “Coercion” my ass. 🙄
@astra -- men and women can be manipulated, coerced, conned, or peer pressured into doing things they don't want to do. Doesn't make them weak or less independent. It makes them human. You find their weak spot and have at it. Not everyone has the confidence or the wherewithal to stand up for themselves at every situation. You can be caught off guard and relent. Certain generations of Woman more so than men where raised and taught not rock the boat and be polite and gracious or be labled a bitch for their lifetime. Men know this and have used it for their advantage. I'm not trying to infantilize anyone. Astra if you never been taken advantage of then good for you.
Cmon everyone, she was given white wine but she clearly preferred red wine as she was thinking it. But that dumbass Aziz could not read her thoughts and served her white wine! That is clearly assault!
If that woman had done ANYTHING to indicate to Aziz that she was uncomfortable or resistant then I would be much harder on him, but she didn't. He isn't responsible for her unwillingness to communicate with him. He may not be a gentleman, but he's not an abuser.
Well going to someone's place is not an agreement for sex. However she mainly said that she kept feeling pressured, which isn't really an excuse for behavior. No drugging or physical restraint or verbal threats to her well being or career or family or reputation, there isn't much there.
@Brayson -- persistence and begging and pressure are pretty creepy. Consent means willing and vocal participant. Why fuck someone who was not really into it? Its pathetic. She needed to leave but probably didn't want to hurt his feelings which a lot of people do. Aziz is a comic and knows how to read the room. His forty and dating 20 year olds because that age group of women don't always know how to say fuck off to older men.
Wait, why would you group Louis CK and Aziz together? Those look like totally different cases to me, unless I missed something more sinister about Aziz than being an annoying AF date.
So...you will let people use you sexually because you’re “too nice” to say no? Then it’s their fault because they’re not magic mind readers? What is he supposed to do? Every single person that’s ever engaged in sexual activity has been hesitant or not into it, in the beginning (at some time in their life). They can get into it, or stop. If they choose to do it, then don’t fucking complain about the choice.
If this woman is this pathetically weak, she needs an adult caretaker. She seems to be dangerous to herself and others, and perhaps needs someone to watch out for her.
@JT, Does her voluntarily blowing him twice, in two different rooms, cover willing and vocal? Or should consent be equated with porn star enthusiasm and dirty talk? Did you read her account? She was 22, he was 34. She approached him at a party, they flirted, exchanged numbers, and flirted for a week over text. Sounds like he met a woman he was attracted to, who was also attracted to him, and neither minded the age difference. Maybe he thought she was a groupie, maybe she thought he was boyfriend material, definitely seems like they had different expectations.
@Brayson -- I read her account. She blew him because he asked. Willing and vocal consent means she would want to give a blow job without it being requested or asked of her. She felt obligated during the whole thing. She relented because of the of fast pace and awkwardness. How did you skip that?
@astra What fucked up sexual experiences have you had to think everyone engages in some form of sex that there not into? WTF. If sex is between two or more consenting adults who understand what everyone wants and is into, then there is no reason to experience any hesitation or pontentially crossing peoples boundaries.
Long after our divorce my ex husband and I had to talk about the children on the phone. Anytime I said NO to anything he would say So I guess a blow job is totally out of the question. lol It was some sort of OCD of his.
Lol I’m married. Sometimes I don’t feel like doing it, but I love my husband and so I do it. Usually I get into it after a bit. That’s NORMAL. Is that rape? Wtf? You sound insane. Nobody on this planet, in a relationship, is going to always want to do it the exact same time that their partner wants to do it. It’s called compromise.
So what do you expect him to have done? Not asked her? Telepathically asked her? Was she just supposed to get down there and start sucking? Wouldn’t that have been crossing his boundaries? They weren’t in a relationship, so it’s not like they had months or years to really know the other person, so that’s probably why he asked her. How is that forcing her into anything? If she can’t give a clear answer, or can be “forced” into doing things then she needs to be under the care of guardian or something. There is no way in the world she is a victim of ANYTHING other than her own stupidity/inability to say no. Which isn’t rape or “coercion” or anything. He didn’t know her, he just wanted to get his dick sucked. She consented. Where is the problem? It only became an issue when she didn’t get a relationship with him, or get whatever she was looking for and had regrets. That isn’t rape. Sorry.
@JT she met aziz while she was on a date with another guy. She ditched her date to go after the famous guy. she is not a delicate flower, either. What about that poor guy who took her to a cool party with famous people, so she could dump him mid-date to go chat up someone else with more money and fame? maybe he was a victim too?
If she had said stop or no, and Ansari forced her, it would be a different thing. Aziz thought she was into it, cause she continued and never said anything, why do it if she wasn't into it. It was bad date, where the chemistry was off, and regret is not the same as assault.
Ansari is a hack comedian, but he is by no means a weinstein.
I’ve never given someone a blow job (except for long term boyfriends) just because ‘they asked’. I also don’t go to someone’s apt. or invite them to mine when I barely know them, unless I intentionally want something to happen. And if I ever find myself in an uncomfortable situation, I get up and leave. (This includes public or private places. A few weeks ago I was having dinner with someone and I found out that he lied to me and he was married. I got up right in the middle of dinner, said ‘this won’t work for me’, put on my coat, and walked out.) Simple, no?
@Astra -- thats fucked up -- you shouldn't have to feel you have to do something you don't want to do just because you are asked. You should want to fuck you husband not feel obligated to do it because you love him and he is in the mood. That statement proved my point. You have a fucked up sense how people have sex. If she made the motions to go down on Aziz without him asking, I sure he would have said something if he did not want to. And if he didnt voice his objections but made it obvious that he didn't want it, then yes, she would have been in the wrong. Stop having obligated sex with your husband. If you are not in the mood he should respect that.
@galouise - she was pulling away and withdrawing all night.. I never compared aziz to weinstein. So what if she ditched some guy to spend time with Aziz. What the fuck does that have to do with Aziz constantly putting her hands where she didn't want. I never said Aziz was a rapist. I said he is a creep. Big difference.
From that one story, we can extrapolate that Aziz is guilty of being a total douche. I don't know that many women view him as an abuser from that one story. It exposed a guy we thought might be a little more evolved as just another cringelord, using his status to get young, pretty girls to come to his apartment and suck his wee one. I mean, dude did go into hiding and was embarrassed by the whole thing so it's not like it was nothing.
@JT, You're just trolling us at this point 😅 You said "She blew him because he asked." That's pretty much the definition of consent. It's like asking someone to hold your groceries.
@Brayson -- not trolling at all and I think you know that. F.R.I.E.S is the definition of consent with regards to consensual sex. Any guys reading these comments and are only getting blow jobs or fucked because you have to ask for it or beg for it, I really feel sorry for you. I hope you experience sex with someone who gives bjs and hot sex becuase they are sexually aroused by you, turned on by the very thought of you, and truly want to make you cum.
Lol you are seriously nuts. Compromise is how relationships work. My husband does a lot of shit for me he doesn’t want to do. That’s life. You can have your opinions about relationships, but for some reason I am thinking you may not have had any that were/are successful. Whatever fantasy land you live in where two people always want the exact same thing at the exact same time and nobody ever has to do something for the other person, to make them happy, because they love that person.....bless your heart. Seriously. I see a house full of cats in your future.
Oh and I’ll handle my sex life exactly how I please. Because I’m a grown ass adult and can and do make decisions on that, and many other things. The “consent” brigade can dislike it all they want but ten years and still happy and in love as ever is enough proof to me that what I’m doing is working for me.
Sure, Jan, astra's right. Marriage is two people, living together, and there's got to be compromise or it won't work but that can be rewarding over time.
I don’t care if you believe it or not. Why would I? Who the fuck are you anyway? You handle your life how you want and stop trying to lecture others on how to handle theirs. Not everyone is going to believe the same wacky shit you believe. Evidently this triggers you. So leave me alone, this shit is tedious now and you’re sad and I bet your cats need their litter boxes changed so.....👋🏻
The woke-rage with Aziz Ansari is bullshit. He had a date with a woman who scored some attention by outing him publicly for asking for a beej after a date. How about just saying no, or telling him off if you're really so inclined, and then leaving? But, noooo, not when there's attention to be derived from outrage and shame and All The Emotions.
@Astra - Gurl, are you alright? I struck a nerve I see. I didn't ask you to share all that shit about your compromising marriage. If you didn't want me to comment on it, why the fuck share that shit with me, a total stranger. Call me insults and believe that I'm single, sad and with a bunch cats if that what gives you superiority over me and helps you sleep at night. You seem triggered not me.
Geezus @megan - Not off base. Healthy relationships with the right person is not all about compromise. People is these comments defining marriage as some kind of quid pro quo is kinda messed up.
WTF? Some of you are seriously downplaying Aziz's conduct. He didn't ask, he repeatedly badgered her. Are you people seriously ok with this:
"he wouldn’t let her move away from him. She compared the path they cut across his apartment to a football play. “It was 30 minutes of me getting up and moving and him following and sticking his fingers down my throat again."
"“He probably moved my hand to his dick five to seven times,” she said. “He really kept doing it after I moved it away."
"she says she used verbal and non-verbal cues to indicate how uncomfortable and distressed she was. “Most of my discomfort was expressed in me pulling away and mumbling. I know that my hand stopped moving at some points,” she said. “I stopped moving my lips and turned cold.”
"She said she remembers him asking again and again, “Where do you want me to fuck you?” while she was still seated on the countertop. She says she found the question tough to answer because she says she didn’t want to fuck him at all."
You know, a girl could be interested in a a guy but not want to have sex. God forbid, that she actually wants to get to know him better.
@Amartel -- then why are @astra and @meghan assuming I am not married and single with a bunch of cats. Their the ones defining these marriages as a compromise. Not me.
@bayareagirl -- you are right,"She said she remembers him asking again and again, “Where do you want me to fuck you?” while she was still seated on the countertop. She says she found the question tough to answer because she says she didn’t want to fuck him at all." asking and badgering are extremely different . My point is he wouldn't have to do that if she wanted to sleep with him.
@JT & bayarea, Read the description again, at that point they were both naked and had performed oral sex on each other. It was Aziz who eventually at last suggested they put their clothes back on. That's right, the majority of those scenes described around the apartment, the sitting by the couch, the bathroom, etc they are both buck naked. It's not the most suave conversation, but once again he was asking her. Also they had been kissing off and on the entire time. Nude, making out, performing oral sex on each other, those aren't exactly red flags to the average person that they're not with an active participant.
Again, believe what you want. I mentioned how a real, actual marriage and/or relationship works, because you seem to have no idea whatsoever about it. Which is why I assumed your longest relationship was with cats. And I still believe I’m right on that 🤔
I would be interested to know when, in the multiple times he asked her where she wanted to be fucked, where and when was the time that SHE had any responsibility or ability to say “I don’t want to fuck you”. If she wanted to “get to know him better” (yes an apartment in the middle of the night, drinking and hanging out is just the place, of course nobody would EVER think sex could happen THERE🙄)? And even if that was a fine and dandy idea and place and time, when is a STRONG INDEPENDENT AND EMPOWERED WOMYN ever going to act strong and empowered and tell him that she doesn’t want to do whatever (her body her choice)? She obviously chose to S his D and that’s fine. Just own it. Admit you wanted to do it, and got mad because he didn’t want anything to do with you afterwards. Why is this such a problem for this type of person?
@astra - Sure. I am single with a bunch of cats. I am not in a relationship with a man who knows me and knows what I want and who would never subject me to do shit i don't want to do.
You @astra are a strong independent, empowered and woman you never have to do anything and you never did anything that you did not want to do. you and your husband are in a great relationship where you are, i dunno, doing things together that one of you would rather not be doing. Seems perfect.
@astra, Don't worry about them, everyone can read the woman's own account right here and make their own determinations:
"I went on a date with Aziz Ansari. It turned into the worst night of my life" https://babe.net/2018/01/13/aziz-ansari-28355
I'm not a fan of Aziz, seems sleazy to me, but I couldn't find the point where he forced the woman to do anything. If the intent of the writer was to reveal to the world that Aziz was a pig and actually not a sensitive guy, that's fair, mission accomplished. But that evening was not in the same category as the assaults and harassment committed by other celebrities.
I never claimed to be strong or independent or empowered. I’m also not woke or a feminist! Whoaaa
Yes every single person in every relationship always wants to be doing the exact same thing the other person does, 100% of the time. Real life relationships are exactly like what the movies and tv portray and obviously I’m wrong and you’re right and you are totally in a relationship with a real live human being. Not an anime pillow or cat or whatever item forever alone people, fixate on.
Brayson lol I have no idea why I am even doing this but I really cannot believe that people are this far gone from reality. It’s fascinating and sad and kind of worrying.
Hey JT, I think you're missing the part where I mostly agree with you.
As for the Aziz apologists, yes he's a pig and & asshole who marketed himself as "woke" on gender issues. Regardless, there are many shades of unacceptable behavior and while this was not as dark as the rapes and assaults committed by others, but it was still wrong and he should be shunned for it. However, I do appreciate that, unlike Louis CK, Aziz is acting remorseful.
I'm not certain of your ages, but I think people have lost perspective in today's hook-up culture. Just because someone comes to your apartment does not mean they want to have sex with you. Sometimes, it's the only quiet place to talk. When we first dated, my husband & I must have visited each other's residences a dozen times before we did the deed.
Let's not compare this situation with marriage, because they just met. Any guy who expects sex from someone they just met is an a-hole. I know it happens, but you should not expect it.
There used to be pretty hard and fast rules to dating, courting, etc. It let everyone know where they stood and kept things from being confusing for everyone. Now, nobody knows what anyone else wants or expects. Some want to get laid, some want a relationship, etc. Since there are no rules any longer, it is extremely important that everyone makes their expectations, and feelings clear from the beginning. None of this wishy washy stuff will fly nowadays. If you are not comfortable with, or capable of, saying no to a man if he wants to have sexual contact with you, then you have no business being in his apartment. Again, I wonder where and when the woman has any responsibility in this?
@astra - there is no confusion. from your comments you seem to be of the generation of women who believe if man crosses a boundery then it is the woman's fault for whatever reason. Men and woman can be alone in a man's home without any assumption that it will lead to sex. Men are not compulsive animals, and I am sorry you grew up in a time that reinforced that notion. Men and woman both understand non-verbal cues and such. Its pathetic to have verbally and adamantly say the word no for people to realize someone is not into you or in the mood.
I know women like you. They settled for the first guy that proposed even though he is not what they had in mind when they thought of a husband but hey it is better than being single and people assuming you are home with a bunch of cats. now they're in passionless marriages, and mostly likely than not one of them (usually the husband) is having a affair with someone who they don't have to ask for sex. You call it compromise but no, what you did is settled and now you are angry at everyone that is not miserable like you.
It’s pretty shitty that Aziz is still being persecuted while Buster Scruggs with James Franco got an Oscar nomination and Casey Affleck’s won an Oscar in spite of those allegations that very year.
Aziz has apologised for not reading his date's sign and has educated himself about enthusiastic consent. That babe expose has told us he's not the sweet guy we thought he was. The woman went into the date expecting him to be Dev from Master of None. But the reality is far from fiction, even his own writing.
If Mindy has decided that Aziz has repented enough and is time appropriate for him to be assimilated into society it's her call. His show has also addressed the issue delicately unlike Louis C.K. talking ill about those poor kids.
Why just crucify Mindy for her support of him and not the Academy on the whole for lauding those films? Let alone, supporting Woody Allen each time they do.
Aziz literally wrote the book on “modern romance” & used it to get people to let their guard down around him so he could pressure & push them into doing stuff they OBVIOUSLY weren’t interested in or comfortable with. All CK did was ask if he could masterbate & then masterbate & yeah it’s not professional & he should have and did apologize but in my book Aziz is the creep that shouldn’t have a career & CK is a disgraced A lister who I’m rooting for to make a comeback,
Louis CK/Khaling?
ReplyDeleteOr Any Poehler I bet
DeleteMindy/Aziz
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteTina Fey/CK
ReplyDeleteMindy and Aziz
ReplyDeleteYep agreed Mindy and Aziz
ReplyDeleteMindy in earlier baby daddy blind. She is BJ Novak’s doormat.
ReplyDeleteAhh, Mindy was getting her chops busted because Aziz is a terrible lay? It's not like she was dumb enough to f*ck him.
ReplyDeleteAziz was just guilty of having a bad date, it must be CK.
ReplyDelete@Longtimereader -- this still can be Aziz since he got a lot of heat for it and had to go into
ReplyDeletehiding for it. It wasn't sexual assault like CK but it was creepy and was riddled with coercion.
Aziz did nothing wrong.
ReplyDelete@SdAuntie - if you say so
ReplyDeleteAgree w/ the bad date. Ridiculous to include Aziz in “me too”.
ReplyDeleteWhy is everyone labeling this as a date.
ReplyDeleteCoercion, by her own account, how many times did that woman willingly blow him? 2 times, maybe 3? According to her every time she got uncomfortable he stopped. Is begging now going to count as a sex crime?
ReplyDelete+100000 brayson
DeleteAmy Poehler and Louis CK.
ReplyDelete@JT, Because they arranged to have a date after texting for a while, met at his apartment, went to a restaurant, had dinner, went back to his place, drank wine and started kissing and undressing each other in the kitchen. Her words.
ReplyDeleteSounds like a date.
ReplyDeleteIt’s Mindy and Aziz- she came out and said that she can support #metoo and also support a friend and that those two are independent of each other
ReplyDeleteHow did CK sexually assault anyone? He asked permission to jerk off, then jerked off. If the broads didn't want him to, they could have said no or left.
ReplyDeleteI never said it was crime. I said it was creepy and coercive. He met a young fan after a show. She was star struck and wanted to spend time with someone she admires. If I was Aziz, I would have kicked her out and found a more willing participant. She was an adult and could have been more adamant about what her boundaries were, But I seriously doubt Aziz is naive about his celebrity status and what he can get young female fans to do with the right amount of pressure.
ReplyDeleteOh FFS, we should have just checked the articles to answer the blind lol
ReplyDeletehttps://www.vanityfair.com/hollywood/2019/02/mindy-kaling-defends-aziz-ansari
@JT, here is her own account of what happened that night:
ReplyDelete"I went on a date with Aziz Ansari. It turned into the worst night of my life"
https://babe.net/2018/01/13/aziz-ansari-28355
I still don't see how Aziz or CK did anything wrong. Grow up, ladies.
ReplyDeleteCK sexually harassed his coworkers. It's that easy.
ReplyDeleteAziz was romantically a pig and apparently not the sweet persona he put on for the screen and stage. Which is strange because he always seemed sleazy and fake to me, not sure what this woman was seeing.
Did Aziz force her into anything? Does a woman have agency or not? Are they strong and independent, or not? It’s pretty much a given if you’re going to his house you’re going to at least be steadily hit on with the goal of getting into your pants. How are there people out there that still don’t get this? If you don’t want to do it, either don’t go there in the first place or if you do go, and you aren’t happy with the situation, leave. “Coercion” my ass. 🙄
ReplyDelete@astra -- men and women can be manipulated, coerced, conned, or peer pressured into doing things they don't want to do. Doesn't make them weak or less independent. It makes them human. You find their weak spot and have at it. Not everyone has the confidence or the wherewithal to stand up for themselves at every situation. You can be caught off guard and relent. Certain generations of Woman more so than men where raised and taught not rock the boat and be polite and gracious or be labled a bitch for their lifetime. Men know this and have used it for their advantage. I'm not trying to infantilize anyone. Astra if you never been taken advantage of then good for you.
ReplyDeleteCmon everyone, she was given white wine but she clearly preferred red wine as she was thinking it. But that dumbass Aziz could not read her thoughts and served her white wine! That is clearly assault!
ReplyDeleteIf that woman had done ANYTHING to indicate to Aziz that she was uncomfortable or resistant then I would be much harder on him, but she didn't. He isn't responsible for her unwillingness to communicate with him. He may not be a gentleman, but he's not an abuser.
ReplyDeleteWell going to someone's place is not an agreement for sex. However she mainly said that she kept feeling pressured, which isn't really an excuse for behavior. No drugging or physical restraint or verbal threats to her well being or career or family or reputation, there isn't much there.
ReplyDeleteAziz "drink your white wine" Ansari is an apex predator.
ReplyDelete#believewomen
@Brayson -- persistence and begging and pressure are pretty creepy. Consent means willing and vocal participant. Why fuck someone who was not really into it? Its pathetic. She needed to leave but probably didn't want to hurt his feelings which a lot of people do. Aziz is a comic and knows how to read the room. His forty and dating 20 year olds because that age group of women don't always know how to say fuck off to older men.
ReplyDeleteMy bad. He is not forty but close to it.
ReplyDeleteWait, why would you group Louis CK and Aziz together? Those look like totally different cases to me, unless I missed something more sinister about Aziz than being an annoying AF date.
ReplyDeleteSo...you will let people use you sexually because you’re “too nice” to say no? Then it’s their fault because they’re not magic mind readers? What is he supposed to do? Every single person that’s ever engaged in sexual activity has been hesitant or not into it, in the beginning (at some time in their life). They can get into it, or stop. If they choose to do it, then don’t fucking complain about the choice.
ReplyDeleteIf this woman is this pathetically weak, she needs an adult caretaker. She seems to be dangerous to herself and others, and perhaps needs someone to watch out for her.
@JT, Does her voluntarily blowing him twice, in two different rooms, cover willing and vocal? Or should consent be equated with porn star enthusiasm and dirty talk?
ReplyDeleteDid you read her account? She was 22, he was 34. She approached him at a party, they flirted, exchanged numbers, and flirted for a week over text. Sounds like he met a woman he was attracted to, who was also attracted to him, and neither minded the age difference. Maybe he thought she was a groupie, maybe she thought he was boyfriend material, definitely seems like they had different expectations.
@Brayson -- I read her account. She blew him because he asked. Willing and vocal consent means she would want to give a blow job without it being requested or asked of her. She felt obligated during the whole thing. She relented because of the of fast pace and awkwardness. How did you skip that?
ReplyDelete@astra What fucked up sexual experiences have you had to think everyone engages in some form of sex that there not into? WTF. If sex is between two or more consenting adults who understand what everyone wants and is into, then there is no reason to experience any hesitation or pontentially crossing peoples boundaries.
Long after our divorce my ex husband and I had to talk about the children on the phone. Anytime I said NO to anything he would say So I guess a blow job is totally out of the question. lol It was some sort of OCD of his.
ReplyDeleteAziz disgraced for giving a girl red wine instead of white, what a cad to not give the lady a choice
ReplyDeletePoehler and CK
ReplyDeleteLol I’m married. Sometimes I don’t feel like doing it, but I love my husband and so I do it. Usually I get into it after a bit. That’s NORMAL. Is that rape? Wtf? You sound insane. Nobody on this planet, in a relationship, is going to always want to do it the exact same time that their partner wants to do it. It’s called compromise.
ReplyDeleteSo what do you expect him to have done? Not asked her? Telepathically asked her? Was she just supposed to get down there and start sucking? Wouldn’t that have been crossing his boundaries? They weren’t in a relationship, so it’s not like they had months or years to really know the other person, so that’s probably why he asked her. How is that forcing her into anything? If she can’t give a clear answer, or can be “forced” into doing things then she needs to be under the care of guardian or something. There is no way in the world she is a victim of ANYTHING other than her own stupidity/inability to say no. Which isn’t rape or “coercion” or anything. He didn’t know her, he just wanted to get his dick sucked. She consented. Where is the problem? It only became an issue when she didn’t get a relationship with him, or get whatever she was looking for and had regrets. That isn’t rape. Sorry.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDelete@JT she met aziz while she was on a date with another guy. She ditched her date to go after the famous guy. she is not a delicate flower, either. What about that poor guy who took her to a cool party with famous people, so she could dump him mid-date to go chat up someone else with more money and fame? maybe he was a victim too?
ReplyDeleteIf she had said stop or no, and Ansari forced her, it would be a different thing. Aziz thought she was into it, cause she continued and never said anything, why do it if she wasn't into it. It was bad date, where the chemistry was off, and regret is not the same as assault.
Ansari is a hack comedian, but he is by no means a weinstein.
I’ve never given someone a blow job (except for long term boyfriends) just because ‘they asked’. I also don’t go to someone’s apt. or invite them to mine when I barely know them, unless I intentionally want something to happen. And if I ever find myself in an uncomfortable situation, I get up and leave. (This includes public or private places. A few weeks ago I was having dinner with someone and I found out that he lied to me and he was married. I got up right in the middle of dinner, said ‘this won’t work for me’, put on my coat, and walked out.) Simple, no?
ReplyDeleteExactly, Aquagirl.
Delete@Astra -- thats fucked up -- you shouldn't have to feel you have to do something you don't want to do just because you are asked. You should want to fuck you husband not feel obligated to do it because you love him and he is in the mood. That statement proved my point. You have a fucked up sense how people have sex. If she made the motions to go down on Aziz without him asking, I sure he would have said something if he did not want to. And if he didnt voice his objections but made it obvious that he didn't want it, then yes, she would have been in the wrong. Stop having obligated sex with your husband. If you are not in the mood he should respect that.
ReplyDelete@galouise - she was pulling away and withdrawing all night.. I never compared aziz to weinstein. So what if she ditched some guy to spend time with Aziz. What the fuck does that have to do with Aziz constantly putting her hands where she didn't want. I never said Aziz was a rapist. I said he is a creep. Big difference.
@aquagirl, It can be very simple for some. I few posts earlier, I've discussed why it may not be simple for others.
ReplyDeleteFrom that one story, we can extrapolate that Aziz is guilty of being a total douche. I don't know that many women view him as an abuser from that one story. It exposed a guy we thought might be a little more evolved as just another cringelord, using his status to get young, pretty girls to come to his apartment and suck his wee one. I mean, dude did go into hiding and was embarrassed by the whole thing so it's not like it was nothing.
ReplyDeleteEWWWWWWWWWW I coulda gone the rest of the day not reading a couple of these posts
ReplyDelete@JT, You're just trolling us at this point 😅
ReplyDeleteYou said "She blew him because he asked." That's pretty much the definition of consent. It's like asking someone to hold your groceries.
@Brayson -- not trolling at all and I think you know that. F.R.I.E.S is the definition of consent with regards to consensual sex. Any guys reading these comments and are only getting blow jobs or fucked because you have to ask for it or beg for it, I really feel sorry for you. I hope you experience sex with someone who gives bjs and hot sex becuase they are sexually aroused by you, turned on by the very thought of you, and truly want to make you cum.
ReplyDeleteLol you are seriously nuts. Compromise is how relationships work. My husband does a lot of shit for me he doesn’t want to do. That’s life. You can have your opinions about relationships, but for some reason I am thinking you may not have had any that were/are successful. Whatever fantasy land you live in where two people always want the exact same thing at the exact same time and nobody ever has to do something for the other person, to make them happy, because they love that person.....bless your heart. Seriously. I see a house full of cats in your future.
ReplyDeleteOh and I’ll handle my sex life exactly how I please. Because I’m a grown ass adult and can and do make decisions on that, and many other things. The “consent” brigade can dislike it all they want but ten years and still happy and in love as ever is enough proof to me that what I’m doing is working for me.
@astra - sure, Jan. Please keep selling me on your happy marriage. I am extremely convinced.
ReplyDeleteSure, Jan, astra's right. Marriage is two people, living together, and there's got to be compromise or it won't work but that can be rewarding over time.
ReplyDeleteI don’t care if you believe it or not. Why would I? Who the fuck are you anyway? You handle your life how you want and stop trying to lecture others on how to handle theirs. Not everyone is going to believe the same wacky shit you believe. Evidently this triggers you. So leave me alone, this shit is tedious now and you’re sad and I bet your cats need their litter boxes changed so.....👋🏻
ReplyDeleteToxoplasmosis rears its ugly head again!!!
The woke-rage with Aziz Ansari is bullshit. He had a date with a woman who scored some attention by outing him publicly for asking for a beej after a date. How about just saying no, or telling him off if you're really so inclined, and then leaving? But, noooo, not when there's attention to be derived from outrage and shame and All The Emotions.
ReplyDelete@Astra - Gurl, are you alright? I struck a nerve I see. I didn't ask you to share all that shit about your compromising marriage. If you didn't want me to comment on it, why the fuck share that shit with me, a total stranger. Call me insults and believe that I'm single, sad and with a bunch cats if that what gives you superiority over me and helps you sleep at night. You seem triggered not me.
ReplyDeleteBest comments I’ve read here in a long time. @JT you are way off base and presumably not married lol
ReplyDeleteGeezus @megan - Not off base. Healthy relationships with the right person is not all about compromise. People is these comments defining marriage as some kind of quid pro quo is kinda messed up.
ReplyDeleteNobody's doing that except you.
ReplyDeleteWTF? Some of you are seriously downplaying Aziz's conduct. He didn't ask, he repeatedly badgered her. Are you people seriously ok with this:
ReplyDelete"he wouldn’t let her move away from him. She compared the path they cut across his apartment to a football play. “It was 30 minutes of me getting up and moving and him following and sticking his fingers down my throat again."
"“He probably moved my hand to his dick five to seven times,” she said. “He really kept doing it after I moved it away."
"she says she used verbal and non-verbal cues to indicate how uncomfortable and distressed she was. “Most of my discomfort was expressed in me pulling away and mumbling. I know that my hand stopped moving at some points,” she said. “I stopped moving my lips and turned cold.”
"She said she remembers him asking again and again, “Where do you want me to fuck you?” while she was still seated on the countertop. She says she found the question tough to answer because she says she didn’t want to fuck him at all."
You know, a girl could be interested in a a guy but not want to have sex. God forbid, that she actually wants to get to know him better.
@Amartel -- then why are @astra and @meghan assuming I am not married and single with a bunch of cats. Their the ones defining these marriages as a compromise. Not me.
ReplyDelete@bayareagirl -- you are right,"She said she remembers him asking again and again, “Where do you want me to fuck you?” while she was still seated on the countertop. She says she found the question tough to answer because she says she didn’t want to fuck him at all." asking and badgering are extremely different . My point is he wouldn't have to do that if she wanted to sleep with him.
ReplyDelete@JT & bayarea, Read the description again, at that point they were both naked and had performed oral sex on each other. It was Aziz who eventually at last suggested they put their clothes back on. That's right, the majority of those scenes described around the apartment, the sitting by the couch, the bathroom, etc they are both buck naked. It's not the most suave conversation, but once again he was asking her. Also they had been kissing off and on the entire time. Nude, making out, performing oral sex on each other, those aren't exactly red flags to the average person that they're not with an active participant.
ReplyDeleteAgain, believe what you want. I mentioned how a real, actual marriage and/or relationship works, because you seem to have no idea whatsoever about it. Which is why I assumed your longest relationship was with cats. And I still believe I’m right on that 🤔
ReplyDeleteI would be interested to know when, in the multiple times he asked her where she wanted to be fucked, where and when was the time that SHE had any responsibility or ability to say “I don’t want to fuck you”. If she wanted to “get to know him better” (yes an apartment in the middle of the night, drinking and hanging out is just the place, of course nobody would EVER think sex could happen THERE🙄)? And even if that was a fine and dandy idea and place and time, when is a STRONG INDEPENDENT AND EMPOWERED WOMYN ever going to act strong and empowered and tell him that she doesn’t want to do whatever (her body her choice)? She obviously chose to S his D and that’s fine. Just own it. Admit you wanted to do it, and got mad because he didn’t want anything to do with you afterwards. Why is this such a problem for this type of person?
@astra - Sure. I am single with a bunch of cats. I am not in a relationship with a man who knows me and knows what I want and who would never subject me to do shit i don't want to do.
ReplyDeleteYou @astra are a strong independent, empowered and woman you never have to do anything and you never did anything that you did not want to do. you and your husband are in a great relationship where you are, i dunno, doing things together that one of you would rather not be doing. Seems perfect.
@astra, Don't worry about them, everyone can read the woman's own account right here and make their own determinations:
ReplyDelete"I went on a date with Aziz Ansari. It turned into the worst night of my life"
https://babe.net/2018/01/13/aziz-ansari-28355
I'm not a fan of Aziz, seems sleazy to me, but I couldn't find the point where he forced the woman to do anything. If the intent of the writer was to reveal to the world that Aziz was a pig and actually not a sensitive guy, that's fair, mission accomplished. But that evening was not in the same category as the assaults and harassment committed by other celebrities.
I never claimed to be strong or independent or empowered. I’m also not woke or a feminist! Whoaaa
ReplyDeleteYes every single person in every relationship always wants to be doing the exact same thing the other person does, 100% of the time. Real life relationships are exactly like what the movies and tv portray and obviously I’m wrong and you’re right and you are totally in a relationship with a real live human being. Not an anime pillow or cat or whatever item forever alone people, fixate on.
Brayson lol I have no idea why I am even doing this but I really cannot believe that people are this far gone from reality. It’s fascinating and sad and kind of worrying.
Hey JT, I think you're missing the part where I mostly agree with you.
ReplyDeleteAs for the Aziz apologists, yes he's a pig and & asshole who marketed himself as "woke" on gender issues. Regardless, there are many shades of unacceptable behavior and while this was not as dark as the rapes and assaults committed by others, but it was still wrong and he should be shunned for it. However, I do appreciate that, unlike Louis CK, Aziz is acting remorseful.
I'm not certain of your ages, but I think people have lost perspective in today's hook-up culture. Just because someone comes to your apartment does not mean they want to have sex with you. Sometimes, it's the only quiet place to talk. When we first dated, my husband & I must have visited each other's residences a dozen times before we did the deed.
Let's not compare this situation with marriage, because they just met. Any guy who expects sex from someone they just met is an a-hole. I know it happens, but you should not expect it.
There used to be pretty hard and fast rules to dating, courting, etc. It let everyone know where they stood and kept things from being confusing for everyone. Now, nobody knows what anyone else wants or expects. Some want to get laid, some want a relationship, etc. Since there are no rules any longer, it is extremely important that everyone makes their expectations, and feelings clear from the beginning. None of this wishy washy stuff will fly nowadays. If you are not comfortable with, or capable of, saying no to a man if he wants to have sexual contact with you, then you have no business being in his apartment. Again, I wonder where and when the woman has any responsibility in this?
ReplyDeleteIs any woman who just met a guy, and only wants sex from them, also an a-hole?
ReplyDelete@astra - there is no confusion. from your comments you seem to be of the generation of women who believe if man crosses a boundery then it is the woman's fault for whatever reason. Men and woman can be alone in a man's home without any assumption that it will lead to sex. Men are not compulsive animals, and I am sorry you grew up in a time that reinforced that notion. Men and woman both understand non-verbal cues and such. Its pathetic to have verbally and adamantly say the word no for people to realize someone is not into you or in the mood.
ReplyDeleteI know women like you. They settled for the first guy that proposed even though he is not what they had in mind when they thought of a husband but hey it is better than being single and people assuming you are home with a bunch of cats. now they're in passionless marriages, and mostly likely than not one of them (usually the husband) is having a affair with someone who they don't have to ask for sex. You call it compromise but no, what you did is settled and now you are angry at everyone that is not miserable like you.
Watch your mouth Astra Worthington! I have a houseful of cats. And a garage full of Harleys. 😸😸😸
ReplyDeleteNastiness and stupidity can be indicative of a diet of twinkies and coca-cola. Non sequitur?
ReplyDeleteGentleBreeze, exactly who are you talking about?
DeleteNah but if you wanna believe that, ok. And lol I’m not even 40 so whatever generation you think I belong to, wrong again.
ReplyDeleteGood luck with your unrealistic world view.
Oh Weekittylass, I definitely don’t want to piss off a biker! Lol I don’t have anything against cats but some cat owners are INSANE.
It’s pretty shitty that Aziz is still being persecuted while Buster Scruggs with James Franco got an Oscar nomination and Casey Affleck’s won an Oscar in spite of those allegations that very year.
ReplyDeleteAziz has apologised for not reading his date's sign and has educated himself about enthusiastic consent.
That babe expose has told us he's not the sweet guy we thought he was. The woman went into the date expecting him to be Dev from Master of None. But the reality is far from fiction, even his own writing.
If Mindy has decided that Aziz has repented enough and is time appropriate for him to be assimilated into society it's her call. His show has also addressed the issue delicately unlike Louis C.K. talking ill about those poor kids.
Why just crucify Mindy for her support of him and not the Academy on the whole for lauding those films? Let alone, supporting Woody Allen each time they do.
Interesting debate on a difficult subject...which is why my mind laughed with glee at reading "anime pillow" is the new cats!😂
ReplyDeleteAziz literally wrote the book on “modern romance” & used it to get people to let their guard down around him so he could pressure & push them into doing stuff they OBVIOUSLY weren’t interested in or comfortable with. All CK did was ask if he could masterbate & then masterbate & yeah it’s not professional & he should have and did apologize but in my book Aziz is the creep that shouldn’t have a career & CK is a disgraced A lister who I’m rooting for to make a comeback,
ReplyDelete