Five For Friday - A Broken Soul - A Himmmm Blind Item

This (foreign born A+ list singer) has always seemed like she's been on the edge of disaster ever since her career began. From the stunts she's created; to her public drug use; to her conflicts with other celebrities – she's always tried to stir up controversy.  But her personal life is even far more dangerous than her public persona.  The affairs; the hard drug use; and even doing extreme tricks to satisfy some void in her soul has led many to wonder if something is really wrong inside her mind.  Sadly, it is.  It took less than 24 hours to uncover this the last time we visited her in her home country. The singer's poor rags-to-riches tale is no secret.  But what's been kept (mostly) quiet is what she was forced into from an early age.  We'd always heard the rumors, but hearing it from her was shocking.

While her mother worked taking care of upscale resorts, the young girl was put to work taking care of upscale guests at those same resorts.  It's a service that's been available there for generations.  Any men, usually white and wealthy, who wanted "company" of a woman or girl only had to ask the valet.  The payment was always cash, with a tip to the valet who would pair up the girls with guests based on their requests. Male or female guests, or couples.  The head valet during the singer's era there was also the local police Chief's brother.  Most of the children of the staff were put to work doing this and the average age of the prostitutes are around 14 years old. 

It's no cult or international trafficking ring – just sadly typical third world prostitution.  The local government there cares less, and considers it (unofficially) as part of the tourist trade/service industry.  They say it brings income in to poor shanty-living families with few options.  When told of other options, they say the families and girls involved would rather work an hour to make what they'd earn a week or more in legit work.  And if you ask too many questions or piss off the government or cops? You'll find yourself quickly in trouble, or even locked up for a petty charge to remind you you're not in the USA anymore.

Our singer began when she was just 12 years-old.  She was the most popular girl available in her time there.  A beautiful girl who knew how to charm and perform for the guests, she would sing in the hotel bars for tourists by day – and have "dates" with the men at night.  One date earned her more than a month of singing for tips.  She soon made more than anyone in her family.  Two very famous and wealthy men in particular were among her customers.  This (record label owner) was her best customer, and this (foreign born very rich married A list celebrity/mogul) was one she felt a special love for who always treated her "like a princess"; buying her gifts and new clothes.  She says she was no virgin when she began her work.  One retired U.N. official (who she refused to name) was violent and very abusive to her.  During her "dates" with these men – which were actually rapes of a tween girl no matter how it's justified – she would sing for them and perform.  They both had a big behind the scenes role in bringing her overseas to start her career.  One of them even got her booked on a popular back in the day reality show to legitimize a story of how she was "discovered". 

The PR story in all her biographies and articles are total lies.  Thing is? The singer doesn't deny nor hide from the truth.  She shrugs it off saying that "it's better than cleaning rich people's toilets for little pay, and look at what I got for it. I don't hate my mother for this".  And never blames her family for selling her into child prostitution.  But not all her customers were so benevolent as to buy her gifts and get her career started.  Some used her, physically abused her, and scarred her emotionally for life.  Which is why she says she always feels incomplete.  "Like I got an itch I can't scratch".  No matter how much drugs, drinking, or dangerous sex she pursues…she's never "satisfied".  When told that's a recipe for a very bad ending to her life, and that there's healthy ways to fill that void, she laughed.  "I always know since I'm little that I will never grow old. Least I can do it myself and not be a victim to anyone else. I'm going to die and I do it my way." (Her exact words).  By the time she finished that sentence, she was staring across the water and had tears running down her cheeks. 

She says she feels doomed no matter what she does, which is why she refuses help – including the help we offered her.  How do we know all this? She's making a very private documentary telling the truth of her entire life, that she wants released only when she dies.  She showed us the tapes and explained it to us herself.  She says she figures everyone knows the truth anyway, and that she'll never be anything but "a whore".  "I was (permanent A+ list rapper) whore, the record company whore, I've been everybody's whore. So I will be my own whore and you can tell the world why after I'm gone". 

She says she still cares for those two old, rich men who were good to her and doesn't want them harmed – which is why she won't let it go public until she's gone.  It's so tragic, heartbreaking, and hopefully she'll accept the many offers of no-strings-help we and others have extended to her.  If not? Even she doesn't think she'll be around in another couple of years. Tragic, but that's what she sees as her destiny.  A child who was forced into something and used her entire life by others.  A broken soul.

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