Tuesday, May 23, 2017

Blind Item #12 - The Singer In The Closet - From Reddit

Link

When I first started out in music, I thought I was bi and mostly dated guys. I was really out about it. All the industry people I met said it was really "hot" and definitely an advantage because it meant more male and female fans. I was even told by a famous producer that "Bi trumps gay. It even trumps straight".
There was a very clear opinion that being bi, pan, fluid, no label etc. was "cool", but being gay was just... gay. You get pigeonholed into the gay scene. But if you're bi, you can claim both the gay scene and the mainstream.
Anyway. I'm so lucky that my career has taken off and I have more fans than I ever imagined I would. Lately I've done a lot of reflecting and realised I was actually 100% gay. Well fuck.
I told my manager and producers, who I'm really close to. First words out of his mouth were, "Don't tell anyone." Said I'd lose tons of male fans and become a niche gay artist. And that I better not "shave my head and go all dykey". They said I don't have to actively lie that I'm bisexual, but if any questions come up I should just avoid it by saying something about fluidity and not everyone needs a label.
In the big scheme of things, it's not the end of the world. Worse stuff has happened to me in the industry. I could write a book about how artists are treated, especially women! I'm fortunate to live in a time where I can date a woman and it's not a big deal. (And if I get a big platform, I will come out. But right now it would just erase me from the industry forever.)
What's fucking with my head is I talked to some other artist friends of mine who I knew were some kind of queer. And many told me they were actually gay, but had to play the same game. "You can be gay in behaviour all you want, just don't ever say the word gay or lesbian or homosexual." They told me about their friends, who included well-known artists and actors, who were also closeted gays. In fact it seems a way bigger issue in the movie industry, because you need to be taken seriously in straight roles.
It's totally changed my perspective. I used to wonder where all the gay celebrities were, and why everyone was "no label" these days. Now I know they are hiding in plain sight.
Of course a lot of them are actually in that grey area. And I will take their word for it. It's a real orientation, and doesn't mean you're closeted or confused. But it's sad how many gay people are forced to do it too. It will never be cool to be gay, because you lose your appeal to the majority of people. And show biz depends on appealing to people. No matter how accepting society becomes, the media will be full of closeted people.
It makes me that much more appreciative of people who have come out as gay, even if it ruined their careers.

62 comments:

  1. sandybrook4:50 AM

    Ellie Goulding? If this isn't some totally made up b.s. by a Reddit reader.

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  2. MontanaMarriott4:52 AM

    Tay Tay?!?!

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  3. MontanaMarriott4:55 AM

    Naw I think this may be Demi L

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  4. sandybrook4:55 AM

    It's somebody from either the U.K. or Canada Montana. Look at the way some words are spelled.

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  5. I thinkk its a male singer

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  6. This is very very very much the truth. If people knew how many closeted gay people there are in the industry as a whole I think people would be shocked. The sad part of it all is that gay kids growing up are expected to listen to straight lyrics in music and watch straight people kissing and accept it all but the reverse is not true. Everything we see all the time is straight based. But the industry could change this. More people could come out. Imagine if people in the sixties had just said well racism is just the way it is , black people can't vote and we just have to accept it? Or going back to feminism and the rights of women. What if everyone just kept accepting sexism and women never rose up to change the world? Gay people in the industry and allies need to push back and push back hard for equality. Society will adjust and evolve. It already has with the passing of gay marriage rights. With Trump/ Pence giving power to dangerous homophobes though, the time is now.

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  7. police dog4:58 AM

    i think its a female singer bc the manager person said 'you will lose all your male fans/dont become dykey and shave your head'

    losing male fans = fantasy of them getting w/her in a hetero way obliterated, dykey/shaved head = lesbian stereotype

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  8. Well if everyone is gay then how do you loose appeal? I don't get it. If there was just one mass outing then it wouldn't be taboo because apparently everyone is gay. Who do you loose? Pop is so progressive and liberal and pro- equality. Why are we having this problem?! Sad!!

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  9. TotallyKy5:03 AM

    Lauren Jauregi of Fifth Harmony?

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  10. everything posted here is made up bs.

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  11. Clarisse McClellan5:11 AM

    Demi Lovato

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  12. so its not Taylor S, bcause she doesn't have that appeal on male audience lol

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  13. Sarah5:32 AM

    Could this be Lorde? I feel like she has the appeal to male and female fans, she's still very relevant/popular, and she has spoken out about not putting a label on her sexuality before. Plus, she is from New Zealand, which would explain how certain words are spelled. Her or Ellie Goulding.

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  14. AMartel5:44 AM

    Western society, especially in America, is for the most part very accepting of gay and lesbian people so there is really no need to keep performers "in the closet" other than to have a weapon to maintain control over them.

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  15. MontanaMarriott6:02 AM

    Awwww great observation!

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  16. Clearly this is Harry Styles lol

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  17. Tricia136:22 AM

    Jessie J

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  18. Brondie6:47 AM

    Celine Dion

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  19. JustReading6:55 AM

    Absolutely.
    If I got it, it must be super-obvious. I'm surprised I had to scroll this far down.

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  20. police dog6:59 AM

    emphasis: western society. the whole world isnt a western society. international revenue is more than domestic revenue whether it be singing acting whatever. gay = revenue risk bc bigots spend money too and the greedy industry types dont care where it comes from even at the expense of an indivials well being

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  21. police dog7:00 AM

    taylor will die before she comes out. or all her ex'boyfriends' will come out and her bearding-for-fiction PR will be exposed and damn if that isnt a homophobic blackmailesque scheme she has going...wont look good in the future even more so...

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  22. Cookies7:16 AM

    Are there really that many people in this day and age who would just stop supporting an artist they liked if they came out? I don't get it. How does that change anything?

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  23. Sorry, but no. Being able to walk around outside in some cities with a certain degree of safety is not the same thing as acceptance. If you're in a more rural environment, or a very male oriented one, and you got bills to pay, you keep your mouth shut and you get that money.

    It shouldn't be anybody's business, but for some effed up reason, it is.

    And there's nothing wrong with being no label.

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  24. Tricia137:34 AM

    Yeah I saw blind and she came to mind but I hadn't read it in full so When I was able-I did-and still read it as her..I think she fits mainly because she has absolute crossover male/female appeal but also because she has been somewhat in/out of closet since her ascent to fame(it seems?)

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  25. Gonna hang on super-tight to your own career, though, aren'tcha? I don't think that fame is worth my self-respect, but apparently lots of people do.

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  26. "It's cool that I can date a girl." Nope, this is a female.

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  27. Very well put.

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  28. sidney9:11 AM

    Once upon a short time, I lived in Key West, a very gay friendly town. I got a job with a magazine, selling ads, and had what should have been a profitable client list. Despite excellent credentials, I got a lot of no's..
    Finally in frustration, I asked my boss if my predecessor was gay?? Ans; "No but he could 'pass' and he did..
    So it seems the sexist pendulum swings both ways, as I was a married female and most of my clients were gay business owners.

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  29. Taylor10:17 AM

    Camila Cabello... that girl is as straight as a circle...

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  30. Trashleigh10:37 AM

    I feel like Lorde would have the balls to come out publicly. She wouldn't give a fuck!

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  31. same goes for Jessie J who's British

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  32. Ipoopalot10:55 AM

    I don't think the general public cares that much. It's all executives overthinking and contemptuous of middle America who think gays artists won't be able to be out. Americans don't want to watch gay romances/sex but don't care about if a performer is gay.

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  33. Azrat70211:02 AM

    This totally rings Adam Lambert to me

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  34. Where\'s Jennifer?11:27 AM

    Just waiting Jennifer to show up to tell us bisexuals are mentally unbalanced...

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  35. RenShaw12:15 PM

    I think this is a female artist but can easily fit several folks. I get what she is saying. And this is one of the reasons why I dislike this industry. The biggest homophobes / racist / misogynists are in charge there. Unfortunately they get some affirmation with reality as far as being gay goes. Women went nuts with Ricky Martin George Michael, and Frank Ocean. It was a panty fest on stage. Then they came out. Did the talent disappear, no. But don't tell me the world's prism, as progressive as it claims to be, did not change.

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  36. Adam lambert is already out for like years now.

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  37. Wendy2:05 PM

    Halsey has a shaved head so I doubt it's her lol

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  38. Wendy2:06 PM

    Jessie J has had her head shaved so she either just said fuck it or this isn't her.

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  39. Peach2:08 PM

    Also she shaved her head at one point

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  40. Jennifer2:31 PM

    I have fans. This is amazing.

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  41. Tugboat3:00 PM

    Katy Perry. "Don't go all dykey" sounds like something that she would say

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  42. Wildguess4:08 PM

    Am confused re Enty's intent and reader reaction... why has a thoughtful statement about the career perils of coming out turned into a let's-guess-who-wrote-this contest? Is Enty planning on (blind reveal) outing this person?

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  43. I think Katy Perry is on the verge of coming out but i dont see her posting this on Reddit. My guess is halsey or its bs

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  44. The blind is about a female singer though. I doubt Katy Perry is a lesbian she just dated Orlando Bloom.

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  45. looking closely7:31 AM

    Gosh, sex appeal sells albums, and if you appeal to a smaller audience, you sell fewer albums. Who knew.

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  46. looking closely7:33 AM

    I'm thinking this could be St. Vincent, btw.

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  47. Dobbs9:36 AM

    I want to say Taylor, but she dropped an F-bomb which is unlike he. I do think it is a female that is close to her. Lorde, Camilla Cabello or Ellie Goulding

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  48. Ontoward11:59 AM

    I thought she was always out... At least I heard she was, years ago.

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  49. Sally5:40 PM

    No, you're kind of just known to be a judgmental bitch.

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  50. Jennifer is irony deficient11:43 PM

    Copy that Sally, what a bitch Jennifer is. What she says about LBGT peeps rings true for Derek though

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  51. The most accepting countries I've been are Brazil, Australia, Portugal and Argentina, by far they are the places you feel comfortable kissing, holding hands and walking around. US has "gay zones, gay bars, only traveling through Brazil I notice acceptance over there means walking around every damn street with your boyfriend not going to a gay bar in a gay neighborhood

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  52. looking closely11:11 PM

    You could be right, but I'm pretty sure her current line is along the line of "Its complicated, I don't like labels". As the blind points out, that's basically code for "I'm gay". I'd assume it the case that her label effectively stuck her back in the closet, or, more charitably, she's concerned that being labelled as gay will hurt her career.

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  53. looking closely11:12 PM

    Are you familiar with the term "beard"? It goes both ways. I don't think this is Perry, either, but having dating one guy, or many doesn't mean very much.

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  54. looking closely11:39 PM

    >>there’s nothing wrong with being no label.

    There is nothing wrong with not wanting to carry a sexual label, especially if you're afraid that the label will hurt your professional career.

    But you CAN'T be "no label". Everyone has SOME sexual preference, be it boys, girls, boys AND girls, sheep, whatever. Whatever ones sexual preference is, there is a word that accurately describes it. Not accepting that label doesn't mean its not correct, nor that there isn't one that legitimately applies to you.

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  55. looking closely11:54 PM

    As to someones sexual preference not being anybody's business, in a different context, I agree with you. But in the specific case of female pop singers, effectively all of them have a sexual persona as part of their acts and image. That's part of their costume, stage act, music videos, marketing, etc. A few examples include Madonna, Brittney Spears, Gaga, Perry, Janet Jackson. They're not just selling their singing, they're also selling sexual image. Sex sells, this is part of the marketing/creation of a pop star and its not an accident.

    There is nothing intrinsically wrong with this. But if you're marketing yourself in a sexual way to gain fans, you can't at the same time legitimately claim that your actual sexual preference is nobody's business. The fans care. Most likely what they care about is just a carefully constructed fantasy, but they care. Nothing "F'd" up about that.

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  56. looking closely12:00 AM

    Its EXTREMELY hard to build a career as a pop artist. 99.999% of people who try fail and for the few who make it, its usually a pretty difficult road. So if you're fortunate enough to get a crack at the top, you're probably going to want to do what it takes to stay there.

    Telling what barely even amounts to a white lie ("I don't like labels") I think is perfectly defensible.

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  57. looking closely12:10 AM

    Benz, who says everyone is gay? I'd hope its obvious that everyone has their own personal sexual preference. Actual sexual activity is somewhat circumstantial and can be a little different than preference, but but contrary to some popular current myth, NO, most people are NOT "gay" nor even "bi". The overwhelming majority (well over 90%) of adults are boringly, normally, conventionally heterosexual.

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  58. I think Lauren Jauregui

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