Good for this former A+ list mostly movie actress. One of her kids has had lots of drug and booze issues so now the mom is acting as the 24/7 sober coach to her child. The thing is, she gave up an acting gig or two to do it.
I know. I always wonder what the plan is. Do you have this person follow you around every second of every day for 30, 40, 50, or how every many years you have left?
See, this is what families of addicts have to put up with. They're expected to drop everything and let their own life, health and welfare be flushed down the toilet all because one selfish family member used drugs. Then they're praised for it. Instead of being helped out of that situation and told that they don't have to let themselves be controlled like that, they're praised for letting themselves be walked all over.
Why should this mother have had to lose pay, and compromise her retirement savings as a result of someone else's selfish actions? Perhaps this mother is a little wealthier than most, but can you understand the devastating effect this has on poorer families? And you praise that emotional and financial abuse?
If the child is willing than the mom is doing the right thing. If you have children and watch them overdose it seems a small price to pay. I have given up everything to get my son right and I have been well rewarded but only because he was desperate to stop. I didn't have children so I could stop caring once they turn 18.
Druggies drag you down. (And I say that as someone who's prone to escapism myself. If you know you have the tendencies, stay the fuck away from them!) But I guess, if they're bound to you by blood, you can't. Bless the person this blind is about, tho.
This is textbook codependence and a terrible idea. People with drug & alcohol issues need to be willing to save themselves. No amount of following them around and slapping their hands will ultimately prevent them from using if that's on their list of things to do.
@hunter, actually often at a certain point the person's brain chemistry literally changes to the point where they don't comprehend they're capable of stopping. At that point, strong intervention is often the only thing that can save them. After they're medically detoxed, only then can you hope to get through to them with anything resembling logic. Treating the problem as solely a behavioral issue, as opposed to a medical one, often leads to disaster. I speak from the perspective of someone who lost a family member to alcohol and wished I'd understood more about the medical aspects at the time.
Ive been sober 3 years 5 months. I wonder if this is the familys way of saying you fuck up after this dont come back. And that the mom is drilling in his head the entire time lose sobriety,lose everything They can afford to miss work.normal circumstances you cant. its very sad to watch families go thru this
Demi Moore
ReplyDeleteCan't be Demi,it says one of her kids,and she's probably not completely sober herself.Also,she wouldn't be giving up much,she rarely works now.
ReplyDeleteIt's Demi---she's loopy -the whole family is -always have been always will..
ReplyDeleteWhat do you mean?....Demi has 3 kids
ReplyDeletethe whole 'sober coach' idea is bullshit.
ReplyDeleteRita Wilson
ReplyDeleteI just saw a snippet of an interview with her on some tabloid show like ET- she looked magnificent
ReplyDeleteHow old are Julia Roberts' kids now?
ReplyDeleteJust throwing out Annette Benning.
ReplyDeleteI know. I always wonder what the plan is. Do you have this person follow you around every second of every day for 30, 40, 50, or how every many years you have left?
ReplyDeleteSee, this is what families of addicts have to put up with. They're expected to drop everything and let their own life, health and welfare be flushed down the toilet all because one selfish family member used drugs. Then they're praised for it. Instead of being helped out of that situation and told that they don't have to let themselves be controlled like that, they're praised for letting themselves be walked all over.
ReplyDeleteWhy should this mother have had to lose pay, and compromise her retirement savings as a result of someone else's selfish actions? Perhaps this mother is a little wealthier than most, but can you understand the devastating effect this has on poorer families? And you praise that emotional and financial abuse?
Exactly. I have a couple of train wreck family members. You can only do so much damage control for them, then just say you're on your own.
ReplyDeleteApplause @really
ReplyDeleteYou said it well.
If the child is willing than the mom is doing the right thing. If you have children and watch them overdose it seems a small price to pay. I have given up everything to get my son right and I have been well rewarded but only because he was desperate to stop. I didn't have children so I could stop caring once they turn 18.
ReplyDeleteAnnette Benning
ReplyDeleteDruggies drag you down. (And I say that as someone who's prone to escapism myself. If you know you have the tendencies, stay the fuck away from them!) But I guess, if they're bound to you by blood, you can't. Bless the person this blind is about, tho.
ReplyDeleteThis is textbook codependence and a terrible idea. People with drug & alcohol issues need to be willing to save themselves. No amount of following them around and slapping their hands will ultimately prevent them from using if that's on their list of things to do.
ReplyDelete@hunter, actually often at a certain point the person's brain chemistry literally changes to the point where they don't comprehend they're capable of stopping. At that point, strong intervention is often the only thing that can save them. After they're medically detoxed, only then can you hope to get through to them with anything resembling logic. Treating the problem as solely a behavioral issue, as opposed to a medical one, often leads to disaster. I speak from the perspective of someone who lost a family member to alcohol and wished I'd understood more about the medical aspects at the time.
ReplyDeleteIve been sober 3 years 5 months.
ReplyDeleteI wonder if this is the familys way of saying you fuck up after this dont come back. And that the mom is drilling in his head the entire time lose sobriety,lose everything
They can afford to miss work.normal circumstances you cant. its very sad to watch families go thru this