November 18, 2015
This game show host/actor/comedian is starting to hurt for money. His wife spends a ton and his girlfriends spend even more. Plus of course there is that new baby on the way which one of the girlfriends says is his.
Steve Harvey (Probably why he agreed to the Miss Universe publicity trick)
November 17, 2015
This former A- list movie and television actress no longer acts but has A+ list name recognition. Apparently she made a sex tape with a classmate who has been showing it around school.
Amanda Bynes
November 17, 2015
Over the past couple of weeks this foreign born actor/actress married couple have spent more time together than the past six months combined. It is showing. At their most recent appearance together, the A list mostly movie actor and his B list mostly movie actress wife wore plastered fake smiles when they were posing together and tried to distance themselves as much as possible for the rest of the event. Things are definitely not good.
Daniel Craig/Rachel Weisz
November 17, 2015
They definitely won’t make a peep in public, because that is not their way, but this A+ list celebrity half foreign born couple is in marriage counseling. Apparently he strayed or at least was dishonest about his interactions with a woman and the marriage is teetering.
Tom Brady/Gisele Bundchen
This former A+ list reality star who thankfully does not get any kind of television work any longer makes it clear to her car service that she will not get in the car if a man of color is driving. Strangely enough, she is fine with a woman of color driving.
This B- list mostly movie actress was in that vampire franchise and not done much since. She was jealous of the amount of time her actor husband was spending with a woman who he had known and worked with years before meeting our actress. She made her husband fire her and replace her with our actress and to scrub any trace of the woman from her husband's social media or biographies.
This former A list celeb from a decade ago turned reality star turned C list celeb turned part-time reality-star is raising money from fans t support her drug habit.
This world leader shows photos of former lovers who are now dead to remind current lovers what the price is for breaching confidentiality. The photos are from homicide scenes.
December 16, 2015
This tweener turned drug addict turned I changed my life around and please buy my music B list singer has always had the mouth of a sailor. She turned it on a 9 year old at a smoothie store who asked for an autograph. Yeah, he didn’t get the autograph. She lost a fan. She doesn’t really care.
Demi Lovato
December 16, 2015
With nothing to promote this time around, this pint sized former A list reality star from multiple reality shows is just letting her husband do what he wants with who he wants. It is what he has been doing the entire time they have been together but she has stopped sticking up for him.
Snooki
December 15, 2015
Unless you are a hot woman ready to have sex with this Academy Award winning/nominated actor/singer he doesn’t want to talk to you so don’t try. Any attempt at conversation will be me with a f**k off.
Jared Leto
December 15, 2015
There was no such thing as being nice to or interacting with the troops when this A+ list singer performed on a military base. The singer refused to speak to any of the troops except when she was required to. No autographs or photos.
Katy Perry
This former A list tweener turned addict turned guy in a band with a strange name shared a bathroom sink and some coke with this foreign born model/former beard to an A+ lister. The tweener and model first spoke earlier in the evening and then met in the women's restroom of the restaurant where they were both dining.
This A-/B+ list mostly movie actress who is a celebrity offspring paid one of her friends $2500 to have a threesome with the actress and the guy the actress would like to date. Apparently he requested it and our actress will do anything at this point to have a high profile public relationship.
It turns out that this permanent A+ lister/icon who is a little height challenged does have offspring. He just does not want anyone to know it. He met the mother of the child way back at the peak of his career and she raised the son out of the public spotlight. Apparently the son wants to be noticed now though and wants to come forward. The only thing holding him back is the threat of being cut off financially.
This very loud and very opinionated daytime talk show host who is part of a group in more than one way is cheating on her husband. She gives him a hard time but it is just to cover what she is doing.
December 15, 2015
This A list mostly movie actress who is also A list on television for a few more months loved acting hurt about the fate of her television show. She Is the reason the show is ending. Hates her co-workers. Thinks she is way better than they are and wants to work much less for far more money.
Melissa McCarthy
This reality star was on an A list reality show. Then, suddenly the show was gone and our star thought she could move on and lead a normal life. She wanted out of the spotlight and to even change her name. She moved out of the family home and for three months actually lived on her own. By herself. She made friends and went out and even boozed it up a few times at some clubs. She was loving life. Then, she got dragged back to the family. Back to the place she never wanted to go again. They needed her help they said. Just for a little while. That little while has stretched into almost a year. Now, she is being forced to film again. They want to film her dating and getting married, but she won't do it. The thing is, while she was free for those three months, she met a guy. A divorced guy with a couple of kids who is about a decade older. Did I mention that she hooks up with him every chance she gets and that only two or three people even know about the relationship but none of those are in her family. Did I mention that her racist parents would freak out to know her boyfriend is biracial? Did I mention she is the only one in the family I like? I have met her a few times and she isn't creepy or zombie like.
December 15, 2015
It is interesting to see that this former A list mostly television actress from two hit shows and has A list name recognition despite not doing much except post photos of herself on social media and talk about sports has totally distanced herself from a former company. They paid her millions of dollars, but she likes to pretend they didn’t. You know, because they are getting sued.
Alyssa Milano/WEN Hair Care
December 15, 2015
They seem like such good friends. They are, as long as there is not any competition. Actually let me clarify. There is an A+ list mostly movie actress who is willing to be the bff of this A- list comic actress as long as they do not compete with each other for parts or awards. This whole we love each other thing would quickly turn into a knife in the back for the A- lister if she encroaches on the A+ lister’s territory. It has happened before. Look around. Show me he A+ lister’s female friends.
Jennifer Lawrence/Amy Schumer
December 15, 2015
At first it was just pop ins. Then, as the paranoia increased, this C- list celebrity wife of this A list mostly movie actor had the nannies take over full-time and has been on set the entire time with her husband to make sure he does not find someone else and dump her. She always seemed so in control, but the jealousy and insecurity has really come out while he has been filming his most recent project.
Hilaria Baldwin
I'm going out on a tiny limb and calling this singer a permanent A lister. I figure if you have not had a hit in three decades and people still know exactly who you are then, you probably are permanent. He used to be A+. Anyway, he has been taking way too much Viagra and has been rushed to the emergency room multiple times over the past few months. It is all these young male escorts he keeps trying to impress.
This former child actress turned tweener actress who no longer acts and is very clear on that despite being in an acting family had some surgery. Well, she has had multiple procedures, but this one was to correct the coke damage to her nose after years of abuse. The doctor kind of screwed it up. OK, he screwed it up a lot and now she looks completely different. Not that you would know it of course because she hides behind layers of clothes and scarves and cigarette smoke.
December 13, 2015
I mentioned within the past month about the work this A+ list mostly movie actor had done to his face and how it is really messed up, but it is so bad that he can’t even do a one day reshoot of a scene for a blockbuster. They had to rewrite the scene so they could shoot him from behind.
Ben Affleck
She loves the attention and contributes to the fanning of the flames whenever possible but this A+ list singer is not pregnant, despite the reports. The way she was chugging back champagne on New Year's Eve at a very fast pace would indicate she isn't.
This former B list reality star on a cable show that doesn't exist is on of those D list reality shows right now which is the last stop before getting a job at a fast food place. The reality star says his brother would be in the same room while the reality star was serviced by guys to make sure there were no recordings or anything to memorialize what he was doing.
This former A list mostly television actress who was also an A list singer kind of does both still but not as well or with as much fanfare is in a celebrity family. She is also desperately trying to keep the quiet the relationship she is having with a woman right now that has been going on or the past three months.
This permanent A list super model is telling friends that her A+ list mostly movie actor friend is headed for divorce. The model loves it because the wife of the A+ lister treats the model like crap.
This former B+list mostly television actress who played the same role multiple times and now does reality television had to get stitches in the back of her head after she passed out drunk again and slammed her head on the kitchen counter. Not the first time for stitches or passing out before making it to bed.
This video vixen does know her new B- list now movie actor/formerly on a hit show before he screwed up husband is hooking up with the co-star of his just completed project. Right? Actually she probably doesn't care. Once you get to marriage 6 or 7 or whatever it is, you just settle.
I mean, she is single, so she can do whatever she wants. The thing is though, this former A list reality star turned talk show host turned reality star was acting like a teenager with a guy who turns 86 or 87 next month. She was all over him in a booth. At lunch. Probably his dinner. Lipstick all over his face and shirt. It was just way over the top. Guess she wanted to seal the deal.
This Teen Mom made a decision she is going to regret when she decided to stop taking birth control. Apparently her significant other is telling people she is already pregnant. His thirst for fame and money would be complete at that point. Not Jenelle.
A receptionist who retired recently says this A list reality star from that reality family, who also has a decent side job had a brow lift when she was just 13 or 14. Mom agreed it would be a good idea.
This A list mostly television actor one of the highest rated network shows who used to do movies back in the day before realizing he could be a lead in television basically treats his on set trailer like a strip club. Women are constantly shuttling in an out of his smoke filled, urine smelling trailer. His girlfriend sticks with him though.
December 11, 2015
One of the things I really dislike is how new celebrity mothers try to shame other mothers or “inspire” them that they can lose baby weight too. This A- list mostly movie actress made it sound like she was just a regular mom. Nope. 4 hour a day workouts, lipo, waist training and starving is how she did it.
Zoe Saldana
I have been working on this for a little while now. I was waiting for one other person to contribute their portion of events, but they have gone radio silent because of the threats of the family against him. Our actress is probably C list at this point. She (GH) used to be B list. Lets call her She had a nice little run with a hit pay cable show and some great movie appearances. Those all dried up though. Lets head back a few years though. when she was in high school she was always short of money. Her parents spent most of the money on booze and other addictions. So, she found out that some of the teachers at her private school would pay money to have sex with her. She then convinced another friend to join her and to move in together to get away from their respective homes. The friend actually became an actress too. A B+ list actress. Lets call her BD.
So, GH and BD are out in Hollywood and struggling so they turn to their old gig. They make a ton of money having sex and acting is just something fun they do in between. The other thing that happens is they both start taking drugs. A lot of drugs. It nearly killed BD, and still might. She has got her life back together and is actually acting again after basically being blacklisted because of her drug use. She is not proud she had to go casting couch to get back on her feet and get some roles, but the last few have been based on her acting and not her skill in bed.
GH? Well, the drugs affected her differently. Kind of a one note actress to begin with, the roles started to dry up and her constant drug use was not helping. She started to get this paranoia. One day she would be sweet and kind and the next day she would slash your tires or throw a brick through your window. One time she was not being sweet and kind when she went off on her drug dealer because he would not extend her any more credit. He had a gun out and she picked it up and emptied the clip in his living room. She told the guy she would shoot him next time and walked out of there with his gun. The guy didn't run after her because he was not sure if there were any more rounds in the gun.
She then drove to her then boyfriend's home who happened to be married and waited until he got home. She just sat in front of his house. When he got home she waved the gun at him and said they were going inside to wait for his wife and tell her what had been going on. She then said she expected him to leave his wife that night while she watched. He kept trying to convince her not to. At some point, a neighbor came over who had been watching the couple's small child and it did something to GH and she walked out. Still with the gun.
Later she used that gun, still without bullets to threaten her family into giving her money for drugs. When she went to go buy drugs though, she didn't want to use her regular deal. For obvious reasons. She had not dealt with them before. They were BD's regular suppliers. GH showed up and made it clear she had a gun which they took from her. She was so out of control they were going to kill her when they called BD who vouched for her. They sent her on her way minus any drugs, money or the gun.
Apparently, shortly after that event or maybe the same night, she went over to a new boyfriend's house and played some game where she tied him to the bed and then she went and got a knife from the kitchen and kept threatening to kill him unless he agreed to marry her. He agreed and during the ride to Vegas he stopped to get gas. She went to use the restroom and he left her behind to make her own way home.
December 11, 2015
This rarely in the tabloids former A- list mostly television actor from a now defunct hit almost network show who is now in something completely awful was getting paid to attend a recent event. Our actor got so hammered that he crashed into a huge display and knocked it over. He had to be helped out of the place by two people.
Chace Crawford
December 11,2015
Apparently things have not been as lovey dovey as they used to be between this A- list mostly television actor and his bff co-star B- list mostly television actress. They have a long history together, but he has been hitting on anything that walks while on set and the actress thinks he is a completely changed guy from what he used to be.
David Duchovny/Gillian Anderson
December 11, 2015
No one at the event recognized her after her most recent face lift and other work done to her, but everyone admitted she looked fabulous and wanted the number of her surgeon. The former A+ list celebrity/really bad actress looks incredible for someone her age.
Raquel Welch
This A-/B+ list still teenage mostly movie actress likes to pretend she is innocent. The fact is though she just had an abortion after she got pregnant with a married producer she had been seeing.
It's interesting that this B-list mostly movie actress who was A- list back in the day and has dated A+ lister supports gays and lesbians publicly when in private she is one big homophobic slur when describing them.
December 8, 2015
This foreign born B list now mostly movie actress after quitting her hit show was at a party recently. She spotted a woman in the corner of the party being groped and pawed by a guy. The woman was trying to get away but was trapped between the man and a bar on the other side of her. Our actress ran over and pulled the woman away and for her trouble got the contents of a drink thrown on her by the guy.
Nina Dobrev
This permanent A+ list mostly movie actor who is not above taking a quick paycheck for a bad movie is married. His favorite game with his young girlfriend is master/slave. He loves that.
This Golden Globe winner from this year might talk a big game about loving his wife, but he cheats on her like he cheated on all the past women in his life. He has not had this much attention since way back in the day.
Like father like son. The son of this A+ list mogul/wannabe rapper is into guys. The dad knows how important it is to hide behind a woman so is frustrated the son does not have that part of it down.
This southeast Housewife is broke as a joke and is trying to find money any way she can, including committing insurance fraud.
The celebrity offspring of this A list mostly movie actor who is an Academy Award winner/nominee was spotted doing drugs again with this former A list singer turned bloated drug user.
Dispelling all those pregnancy rumors is this wife of the foreign born dual threat actor who was spotted doing coke in the bathroom at a recent event.
This A list celebrity/athlete homewrecker who might not have much of an athletic future is being pressured by her ink barely dry divorced woman beating boyfriend to get married. He wants a legal part of her money train and not just the handouts she gives him now.
This foreign born B+ list mostly movie actor who is an Academy Award winner/nominee didn't seem to be thinking of his wife when he was having sex with one of the Thai hookers his frequent director made available at a recent party.
This normally shy A+ list mostly movie actress who is an Academy Award winner/nominee was at a lingerie store in NYC last week trying on several very revealing outfits. Each time she would put something new on, she would come out and ask the sales person what she thought. Nothing that strange about that except there were also about ten customers present at the same time.
I feel like I have been transported back in time three years. There was this foreign born B+ list mostly movie actor reunited with his former A+ list tweener girlfriend making out like he had not been hooking up with this B+ list mostly television actress from a now defunct cable show one day earlier.
December 8, 2015
Things became very heated at a party last week when this B+ list cable actress who has seemingly been on television for two decades straight in one hit after the other got into an argument about politics with another woman. Our actress was asked to leave when things became physical.
Angie Harmon
It is time again for the very irregular feature where I show you how strange some of Hollywood's couplings can be. I give you one half of the couple and let you figure out the other.
#1 - Sean Penn and this former A list reality star from back in the day who still has A list name recognition despite the fact most people dislike her. They both enjoy hanging out with cartel leaders.
#2 - Sean Penn and this barely legal celebrity turned porn star who got married young. Apparently part of her sex tape was for him.
#3-Jennifer Lopez and one of her non scripted co-stars.
#4 - Zoe Kravitz and her former boyfriend's co-star.
#5 - Ashlee Simpson and her one of her sister's ex-boyfriends.
#6- Fergie and this back in the day A+ list tween star who got his start on a hit network television show. Now he does reality.
December 8, 2015
This former A+ list athlete who still plays, despite his age was like a kid in a candy store last week as he was throwing money at models right and left and they were all over him. Probably his favorite time of the year.
Alex Rodriguez/Art Basel
December 7, 2015
What A-list mostly TV actress had to tell her married lover to stay home from that high profile payola event the other night so instead she brought her rarely seen husband for cover?
Kerry Washington/Kennedy Center Honors
December 1, 2015
If you thought his last publicity stunt was insane, his next will have everyone talking. He’s planning on getting a full body wax and shave because he’s planning on going fully nude in a mock slave auction. He’s planning on doing full body blackface and be shackled on his neck.
Shia LaBeouf
This permanent A list stand up comedian/former A- list mostly television actor was asked to leave a club the other night because he was smoking crack in the bathroom.
Although she is no stranger to cheating, this foreign born A- list mostly movie actress had to fend off the incessant moves made by this foreign born A- list mostly movie actor who is an Academy Award winner/nominee who used to hook up with this reality star/celebrity offspring.
December 1, 2015
What star of that hotter than hot Broadway show has alienated many of his longtime friends because they think fame has gone to his head? He used to be such a gracious, humble guy, nowadays… not so much.
Lin-Manuel Miranda/ "Hamilton"
While here in LA over the weekend, this A list day time talk show host cheated on his wife with a low level staffer at In Style.
This aging and controversial former A list mostly television actress back in the day has tried anything including cable and network reality to keep her career alive. Two bodyguards have quit working for her because she makes it clear if they want to work for her they need to have sex with her. The thing is, they are afraid to report her because of her connections.
This foreign born close to one hit wonder who started off on reality television and has a big gig in the works is devastating her already thin frame with a lot of coke. Everyone wants her to succeed with her career but she is her own worst enemy right now.
This B+ list movie/television actor in a hit franchise and on a hit cable show was completely clean and sober. Then, his co-star on again/off gain girlfriend got back in his head and they started hooking up again. One thing led to another and now he is back on drugs even worse than he was before.
It is not where he wanted to be, but this former A+ list mostly television actor who has dropped a bunch since his turn in a hit network show ended is with his actress wife on set. She made him come because of his recent cheating. She doesn't trust him to be alone.
What do you do if you are the wife of this A+ list showrunner and you catch your husband in the act of having sex with someone who works for him? You file for divorce despite your husband chasing you down the driveway with his underwear down to his knees.
This A+ list mostly movie actress who is an Academy Award and Golden Globe winner took a swing at her ex the other night. The foreign born A- list mostly movie actor is tired of her tricks/attitude/substance abuse use and wants nothing to do with her. Plus, he is enjoying the heck out of pretending to be the boyfriend of this B+ list former franchise queen who wants to rekindle the kind of relationship she previously had with someone from the actor's home country.
This former A+ list tweener turned B+ list mostly movie actor still has a chance to make it to A list unlike the rest of the people on his tweener show. Anyway, our actor turned over his social media to his publicity seeking girlfriend and she has turned it into a mess. Everything posted is about her and she spends all her time making it seem like they spend 24/7 together. The problem is she is not very good remembering which account she is signed into.
What A list fitness expert/network reality show star made an appearance recently on a network game show, and mocked the people who come to her/him for help?
This foreign born Star Wars actor had a long time beard but it finally ran its course. He didn't think he really needed anyone but when Star Wars exploded he found a friend to fill in. Our actor is very open to his closest friends, but his family is such that they would never speak to him again if they discovered he is gay.
December 2, 2015
This youngest member of this A iist reality family has a new product she is selling to the public. No harm in that. But, what she is not telling anyone is that she has just put her name on a product she is selling for three times the cost of what the same company sells the same exact product for without her face on it.
Kylie Jenner/Lip Kit
Somehow, despite what I am about to write, the two subjects of the blind item have kissed and made up. It never looked like that would happen way back in the day though. She is A+ list. Permanently so. A singer. There was a time though where that A+ list went down to B+ and it was 50/50 whether she would ever have a career again. Back in the day when she was mentored by this man, he was hurt when she walked away from them so he made it a life mission to crush her to the point where she would never be able to work again. No one would touch her. For any project. She would be reduced to playing cruise ships because he would call every casino and make sure she could not perform in any of them or suffer his wrath. How he could do that? Other connections. Family connections. One example of the lengths he went to is when he contacted this now daytime talk show host who had one of the top radio programs in the country at the time. He offered the radio host $50K and a package of information he wanted her to read on the air and to spread around to her friends and other people in the industry. Despite the fact that the host and the A+list singer did not and still do not get along that great, the host declined. It didn't take long for the guy to find someone else to do it though. This battle of destruction would have continued to the point of no return for the singer, but something intervened on her behalf. Cupid. The guy met someone who he is still with and she convinced him it was not worth his time or effort. If not for that chance meeting, we would probably be asking whatever happened to the A+ lister rather than keeping her as a permanent A+ lister.
December 2, 2015
She does not look like the type, but this briefly A list singer who needs a new hit to even get back up to A list was on a flight. She complained it was hot and unzipped her top and sat in her seat wearing nothing but a bra for almost the entire flight.
Meghan Trainor
December 3, 2015
This B+ list reality show host/wannabe mogul claims to have a girlfriend, and he might, but he is also hooking up with his PR person. That won’t end well.
Nick Cannon
December 3, 2015
Finally this B+ list mostly television actress from a hit pay cable show spent money on something other than the pap who takes her photo every day. Our actress, appearing at charity event for kids, had a moving truck pull up to the offices of the charity a few hours before the event and unload over two thousand unwrapped toys for kids. Get this. It was the second time in two weeks she did it. Impressive.
Emmy Rossum
This foreign born B+ list mostly movie actress from the biggest movie of the year has tried to get ahead of the PR curve and is blaming her bad behavior and unwillingness to do things on her co-star. Not true at all. She is turning into a massive diva while he has been gracious and willing to do whatever the studio wants.
This former A+ list mostly movie actor/director got so drunk the other night that it took the limo driver and the former A+lister's girlfriend and one other person to get the actor/director out of the car. All the while they were trying to help him he was yelling at them.
December 3, 2015
The tabloids want to sell issues to the point where they totally turn a blind eye to the fact that this A+ list reality star has spent about 15 nights this past year under the same roof as her husband. That does not mean the same bedroom, it means the same roof. If this were anyone else, there would be stories about this and everything else in the marriage, but the tabloids have all signed a pact with the devil.
Kim Kardashian/Kanye West
When this OITNB actress had a chance to meet the host of the Golden Globes, he said he was a big fan of her work. She told him to f**k off. Apparently she was not a fan of some of the comments he made during the show.
This very tall A list mostly movie actor is married but it didn't stop him from hooking up with this B- list mostly television actress he met at a Golden Globes party. She has been in a few blinds about her behavior and was last seen in a hit cable show.
This former B+ list mostly television actress who has been acting for decades took a break from acting to take care of her family and her drug problem. The break has continued for a few years now, but she is back on drugs. Prescription pills this time.
This daytime talk show host who supposedly has a live in a girlfriend with whom she is serious cheats on her at work and now also cheats on her on a dating app. With her work schedule and the amount of time she spends cheating, how does she actually spend time with her girlfriend.
It is bad enough that this former almost A- list mostly movie actress has destroyed her life with drugs, but now she has her younger sister hooked too. Even worse. The entire family is now f**ked up with the daughters supporting one half of the family by having sex with people.
Whenever there is any negative press about this A list singer in a group who used to be A list solo back in the day she tries to distract through sex. Whether it be something about her career or questions about her fake marriage, our singer will show up somewhere wearing next to nothing or showing off her body so that is all people want to discuss rather than the bad news. It seems to work for her.
As is their custom, the HFPA voted at least one winner without seeing the performance. They just assumed she would be good and wanted her to keep coming back. She is an A- list singer/part-time actress.
Not just rude to reporters, this A+ list mostly movie actress who is an Academy Award winner/nominee and a winner last night was also rude to a co-star from her movie who she called trivial. Yeah, that trivial person's mom is beloved by millions. Oh, and the trivial person owns a television show.
This former Disney A list tweener is now getting roles via the casting couch. It isn't like the mogul has not made a million careers for people who did the same thing. I just really thought this actress was above it.
This back on almost television after years of drugs and unemployment, you would think this actress would be grateful. Yes, she is on a soon to be hit show and is a name, BUT that diva fit she threw when security made her wait in line with everyone else is not going to win her any friends. Yes, she played the don't you know who I am card. Everyone laughed at her. It made their wait much more entertaining to listen to her muttering from the back. The crowd was 50/50 on whether she was stoned. She better hope she wasn't or that she doesn't get busted.
"Notice I didn't drink any of that.That's because you didn't listen to my order. Get it right next time. I said one lemon and one lime. Not two limes.Take pride in what you are doing even if you are a bartender at a party"
Apparently this was the nicest interaction this B list mostly television actress on a middling cable show who used to be on a hit network show had with anyone other than people who could do her a favor.
"I don't know what to say. She (B list mostly television actress from hit almost network show) was showing photos of them kissing in trailers from the set and on the couch together watching television, but he (A- list mostly television actor from same show) is married right? Plus, since she is on the same network as me, I feel like this might get back to me at some point. Do you tell her they look great together and just ignore the elephant in the room? Are they together? Tell me something."
"It was hilarious. She (B- list celebrity offspring of permanent A listers who has done acting and reality) wouldn't let anyone get too close to her or touch her dress. You could see the butt pads sticking out of her panties. Oh, and the lip fillers were crazy. I get the feeling she is really insecure and wants to be a bigger star than she is."
"How did you get so skinny so fast?"
"Lots of Adderall."
"Oh. I thought it might be coke."
"F**k no. I'm still breastfeeding sometimes. That has to wait."
Conversation between a party goer and this B- list out of work actress who was last seen on a now defunct hit network show.
This B-/C+ list mostly television actress who will be lucky to work after her last almost network show ended heard some people talking about her hair extensions. When she did, she turned to them and snapped that the extensions cost more than they would make in a week and then told them to f**k off. JV likes everyone and is hard pressed to find something she likes about this person. She acted like she decided not to attend the actual event because she couldn't be bothered. When, in fact, she was never invited and probably never will be.
"Someone had to tell me who this person was. When they said her name and her song, I recognized her, but still had no idea what she looked like in person. Foreign born one hit wonder. She let any guy who would share their coke take a feel of her or do some other things which I have never seen at a party here. Guys were literally penetrating her and she let them do whatever they wanted while she was actually snorting the coke. When it was done, she was done. It wasn't like they had to work that hard to find bare skin."
This A- list mostly television actress from a very hit network show had cigarette burns on her legs. She thought she covered them up, but had not concealed them well enough. It was disturbing.
This former A list celebrity who took a turn through several forms of reality television before heading back to her hometown and her celebrity family is worried. Apparently she is so worried that her family has been trying to reach a settlement that would keep her former lover from taking a paternity test.
December 28, 2015
The one time a year this permanent A+ list mostly movie actor does any kind of shopping is last week. It is also the time that he manages to collect as many phone numbers of women as stops he makes. The guy is a million years old and has treated women like crap for five decades but they still want to be with him.
Jack Nicholson
A break from Golden Globes blinds for a minute to discuss this foreign born B+ list celebrity/singer/part-time actress. She has made what I thought to be every deal with the devil to get ahead and to move her career forward. Apparently though, she has more of her soul left to give. The B+ lister arranged to find several women ranging in age from 18-22 who want to make it big in the entertainment industry. They believed our B+ lister when she told them she could help them. She rattled off a series of names of people she has worked with and a bunch of projects she has been in. She said the first thing they needed to do was a nude photo shoot. This way they would attract the right attention from the right people. She knew just the person to take the shots too. when the women would go to the shoot, our B+ lister would be there to help guide them and part of that guiding was convincing the women to have sex with the photographer and also to film the sexual encounter. If you were not willing to have sex or to film it, the whole shoot lasted less than 30 minutes. These shoots will be used later if the women become famous and also to satisfy the debts of our B+ lister. She owed the photographer a great deal of money. Now, she has fully paid those debts and out photographer has a stash of private porn for his friends and to sell, especially if any of the women become famous.
December 25, 2015
This foreign born A list rapper/singer doesn’t look like he would be vain enough to get plastic surgery done, but it is how he maintains his weight. Not that long ago he caught an infection from one of his procedures and actually had to cancel a really high paying gig.
Drake
December 10, 2015
This former tweener actress before there was the term turned disappearing act turned B list actress turned disappearing act turned reality star does not want the cameras to see her with her married boyfriend. She uses all kinds of excuses for not filming on days when he is able to see her.
Kim Fields
December 11, 2015
Apparently trying to fit into his new gig, this former A+ list singer turned B+ lister who has dated a lot of famous women told party goers he had dropped some acid in the limo on the way to the party. He kind of went overboard in telling people. I guess he wanted to be cool.
John Mayer
"I really wanted to meet ________(Foreign born A- list mostly movie actor who was a nominee/winner last night). I had been looking forward to it. I'm a huge fan. Finally got to see him about three quarters of the way through the show. Went up to him and introduced myself. His actress girlfriend was at the next table talking to someone. It was obvious he didn't know me or my show but he pretended he did which was cool. I thought he was being charming and friendly. Then he asked what I was doing after the show because his girlfriend hated these kinds of things and wanted to go home and did I have a place we could go to after. He did it all with a smile on his face and his girlfriend close enough that if I got up and stretched I could probably touch her. Later, I saw him kissing her. A short time after that she was gone to the bathroom or something because I couldn't see her and he had his arm around this actress from that new cable show that did really well. I saw them later and it was pretty obvious she must have had a place for them to go to later."
The most interesting actress of the night award belonged to this long time B/B- list actress who has a career that has spanned three decades and was a nominee/winner last night. Apparently, throughout the night, when someone wandered in the field of vision of our actress or was mentioned, our actress would have a personal anecdote to share. Primarily it was about actors. "Oh, I slept with him on the set of whatever movie." "He was great cover when my husband started sleeping with that w**re of an actress and pretended he was dating her so my husband would not get caught." "When we had a love scene he smelled of sardines." "Everyone gets hard when they have a sex scene with me, except for him. Makes you wonder doesn't it?" The problem AP had in keeping track was our actress was faced in a different direction and there would often be multiple people in her vision so AP didn't always know who she was referring to. She literally had a comment about everyone it seemed.
The nicest winner of the night was probably this B+ list mostly television actress who stars on a hit almost network show. Full disclosure is that she and JV are friends. That being said, JV said that the actress let anyone who wanted take a photo with the award and even helped make each photo look special for the person. She didn't care if they wanted to pretend it was their award. She was just really sweet and nice to everyone.
AP and I have one thing in common. We really dislike this foreign born B list celebrity/model/part-time actress. She might say one thing in public but behind the scenes at the Golden Globes last night she made it clear to several members of the HFPA that she expects a nomination the next time she gets a movie role. Apparently she has slept with several of the members over the past few years. Judging by the way men spoke to our celebrity, AP is convinced she has slept with all of them. They all knew her far too well.
This Golden Globe winner likes the world to think he is sober but he was pounding back shots with this controversial (and made more controversy last night) director who was also a winner last night.
JV thought she had the coke winner of the night, but it turns out her winner was small potatoes compared to the one AP spotted. JV's coke user, when asked by various people throughout the night said things like she really shouldn't or what if she got caught, etc., but always managed to find the way to do some. The coke user in question is an A+ list singer who also let herself be groped at an after party by this foreign born A- list mostly movie actor.
This foreign born B+ list mostly television actress who is on a hit pay cable show and stars in a currently playing movie was the coke queen of the night. Our actress started several hours before the show and continued right up until she finished her stash.
This former A+ list mostly movie actress who has dropped to A-/B+ and is a celebrity offspring made it clear to several men who stopped by her table to say hello that they would definitely get to have sex with her if they wanted to spend the rest of the night on her arm taking photos. This offer was only extended to men more famous than she.
This A/A+ list mostly movie actor never stopped arguing with his wife the entire night. It certainly went against the love they pretended to show for each other on a recent joint television appearance.
This A- list mostly television actor on a hit pay cable show spent most of the evening wandering from one table to another looking for bottles of Moet with champagne still inside. His favorite? The empty tables of journalists who were backstage working. More than one bottle of champagne was removed from their tables and ended up back at his own.
December 11, 2015
There is buzz surrounding this foreign A list boy band. Apparently behind the scenes, their management is quietly booking dates a year from now for the group to go on tour. This would be the exact opposite of the sales pitch they have been giving fans now.
One Direction
December 11, 2015
This former B+ list mostly movie actor turned A-/B+ list mostly television actor on a very hit network show went on a hooker frenzy while out of the country this week. So far, no reports of beatings, but he will probably end up marrying one.
Terence Howard
December 13, 2015
This foreign born permanent A list musician from a permanent A list group that will perform until they die on stage is financing a campaign to keep asylum seekers from living in his town
Keith Richards
December 14, 2015
Why does our favorite foreign born B+ lister own a house, but rent another a few blocks away? Actually, it all kind of goes together. The down payment on her house was provided by the same person who pays the rent for the rental. She only stays in the rental when her current boss would like to have sex with her. He lives a few blocks away and there is a rotating group of women who “rent” the house.
Rita Ora
While this former bad actress turned reality star turned sell anything for a buck celebrity gets massaged she makes her kids sit out in the waiting area with half undressed women and their customers waiting for rubs and tugs.
This permanent A/A+list singer has been spending hundreds of thousands of dollars per month of her boyfriend but has only ever had sex with him one time. She has a million excuses, but she is just not that into him.
This foreign born A-/B+ list mostly television actor on a hit network show went home for the holidays. Apparently his actress girlfriend was cheating on him and our actor took it hard. Really hard. Hard as in the rest of the cast has resumed filming and he is still at home.
Ticket sales have been abysmal for this A+ list singer and her world tour. Well, upcoming world tour. Considering she doesn't want to go through with it anyway, it won't take much for her to pull the plug on it and save her from the embarrassment.
December 14, 2015
I’m not sure I could make this any easier. The reality family that likes to sell the crap they got for free and then donate the tiniest of proceeds to charity have figured out a way t even make that shady. They are donating proceeds from their latest get free stuff and sell it for a profit to a group that is filming a reality show. Guess who one of the executive producers of the show is?Yep.
Kim Kardashian
December 14, 2015
One of the reasons this foreign born A list singer everywhere in the world except in the US has stayed famous enough to be considered permanent A list in the rest of the world is how good she is at manipulating the media. She gives some generic one liner about wanting a family and she creates a two week buzz surrounding her just when she is promoting something. She is not having a family.
Kylie MInogue
December 14, 2015
When an Instagram model goes to Mykonos for a “photo shoot” the only difference between them and this former almost A- list mostly movie actress is that someone will actually publish the “photo shoot” photos making the whole transaction look legit. Like she is not doing the same thing the Instagram models are doing. It makes me angry because she probably trashes them and says things like, “I’m an actress.” WTF have you been in lately?I love how she gets some moron to write a press release about the “photo shoot” to make it seem authentic.
Lindsay Lohan
December 14, 2015
Apparently if you bring this presidential candidate, who used to be doing well, and now is a mess, a whole bunch of money he will do a complete 180 on many of his positions. He doesn’t want you to know that though. Unless you have money and need a favor.
Ben Carson
