Well, I don't have kids, I don't drink, and I have no desire to do pot (I tried it years ago, and could not detect any effect it was having on me other than making me cough,) so it's a really moot question.
It is legal here, and no - I wouldn't smoke in front of kids. I don't think they should be subjected to secondhand smoke. I will drink a glass of wine or beer in front of kids, but won't get drunk in front of them. The difference is one has a secondary effect on people in the vicinity, and the other doesn't.
I don't have kids and if I did, I wouldn't smoke anything in front of them. I do think it's a good thing to drink in moderation in front of kids to set an example of responsible drinking behavior. If they're used to seeing their parents with a glass of wine a or a beer with dinner, it's less of a forbidden fruit later on.
Pot IS legal here in Washington state. I don't know any parents who would smoke it in front of their kids. No way. But I suppose something like socioeconomics would dictate who would allow kids to that type of exposure. Ive certainly got friends in low places, but I guess not that low?
I don't smoke but am for the legalization of marijuana. If I did I wouldn't do it in front of my kids. I know that will sound hypocritical based on my next statement but it is how I feel.
I drink very infrequently (one drink, 2-3 times a year) and have done so in front of my teenage daughter. I used to never drink in front of her, but then read an article about giving kids an example of people who do drink, but never to excess.
All, how is drinking responsibly different than smoking a joint responisibly? Slcohol is a drug as well. Algho most likely they will come in more contact with alcohol than pot. Idk. Glad my kids are grown.
As I said, I knew it would sound hypocritical of me. The main reason is the 2nd hand smoke issue. If I have a drink in front of her there is nothing that rubs off on her. If I smoke in front of her there is 2nd hand exposure.
Obviously young children is never a good thing but an adult, responsible child, sure. My dad came clean to me at about 17 and it made our relationship better. Opened the lines of communication and all that good stuff.
I would have a glass of wine or a beer in front of the kids at a wedding or something, but they've never seen me drunk. I'd only use a vaporizer if the kids were gone on a weekend. My dad smoked in front of me growing up and was offering it to me by 15. Really shitty parenting.
My feeling is that if you have to hide something you're doing from your kids then you probably shouldn't be doing it.
IF I smoked pot I wouldn't do it in the same room with them but I wouldn't hide the fact that I did it from them. My parents did that with me and all it does is breed mistrust. It teaches them to go behind your back. I'd rather know what my hypothetical kids are doing.
As far as alcohol goes a glass or two is no big deal to drink in front of kids. Although I'd never get drunk in front of my hypothetical kids.
"Hypothetical" kids being the key words here. If/when u have kids and its legal to smoke, I think your position on smoking in front of them will probably change- maybe not-
2) 1-2 beers if I'm at a party w/ my son or with a meal I just grilled up. I did get liquored up at a wedding with him once, but it was walking distance from the hotel and I didn't get sloppy.
This is so interesting to me because there are so many people in my world with children who are all into smoking pot. They all do it on the dl, but I feel like that just makes everyone a big ole' hypocrite. For me, if I need to hide a behavior (other than sexay times) from my kid, then I'm not being the best mom I could be. I am not and never have been into pot. Not even when I was a young, impressionable 18-year-old in the 90s and EVERYONE smoked pot. The same people who I mention above always tell me I "MUST" try pot. Eyeroll. It's like they're totally judging me that I'm not on the pot bandwagon. Honestly, the whole marijuana thang just makes me feel like I'm in high school again. And I'm pushing 40!! People get so immature as they age.
I do drink wine in front of my son. I love my wine. And, I hope my son loves to appreciate wine when he's at the right age.
I just wonder about parents who smoke on the dl. That includes pot and ciggies. Don't you think you're kids are going to figure it out? Kids are not that dumb.
I don't have children, but if and when I do I wouldn't smoke in front of them (or even with them in the house). As for alcohol, I'd follow Cathy's and All Lace no Leather's example. Everything in moderation.
I grew up in a house with an alcoholic. Yeah, I learned to stay out of kicking distance when dad smelled funny. I don't do either at all, so I don't have to "hide" it. To each their own though.
Veronica- hmm, also grew up with alcoholic, but no physical abuse. But i dont drink, my husband doesnt, and while i didnt do that on purpose, i dont guess it was an accident either. My inhappy memories are of the idiotic fights my parents wld have while HE was drunk and she wasnt. Even as a kid i used to think, why is she trying to have a rational conversation with someone who isnt rational. Very unpleasant memories.
Normally I go to the extra effort to make sure I don't smoke cigarettes or weed in the vicinity of children, but this weekend was a different story. If you bring your 4 children <6yo to a DMB Caravan and sit them in the crowd on the lawn that's on you.
Pot is legal here in WA and I have a med marijuana card. My son is 18 and he does smoke pot, but I still don't vape in front of him. He knows I do, and has walked by my bedroom when I do and it's no big deal but I still am private about it. As for drinking, there's nothing wrong with drinking in moderation in front of the kid, wine at dinner or a cocktail if we're out to eat (this is my husband I don't really drink) and I actually think it's better to do in front of the kid hide it so the kid learns MODERATION. In Europe parents drink wine at dinner all the time, and I think they don't have as many alcoholic poisoning and binge drinking as we do.
Oh yeah! Totes! I plan to always get blasted around my future kiddos! It keeps their expectations and dreams in check, while keeping my obliterated enough that I can almost forget their very existence!!! If I'm lucky enough, we can even end up the next big family of GANJAPRENEURS!!! California needs it's very own "family of pot!"
I am a fellow Washington stater and I voted for legalization. I am not a big drinker, but my 3-year old has seen me have a beer or hard cider at bbq's or family get-togethers and she knows it's for grown-ups, just like coffee. I do not drink liquor in general save for the VERY occasional mixed drink at adult only gatherings, but I would not do so in my home because my tolerance is really low and as a responsible parent, I cannot in good conscious render myself that incapable of handling an emergency situation as I would be if I drank hard liquor and my daughter needed me to be a present parent. That said, I have always been of the mindset that kids are gonna do what they're gonna do whether you tell them no or not, so the best thing I can do is inform her of her decisions and hope she makes good choices, as well as hope against hope that she realizes that I will always be there for her if she DOES over-indulge and do so without judgment.
As for pot... Pot SHOULD BE regulated as strictly as alcohol, and there are numerous studies that indicate that a child who smokes or inhales or otherwise imbibes THC too early (pre-20/21) has an increased chance for decreased brain function and growth. I don't buy the "gateway drug" bullshit, but someone should be old enough to understand the possible effects of smoking too much, too young, and understand that long-term THC consumption can have negative effects on brain function. Alcohol is just as bad in certain respects, and in fact I enjoy pot more than booze, and responsible consumption is key.
Back to the question, my daughter has never seen me imbibe pot and I plan to keep it that way until she's much older, but having both smoked and drank, I would be all sorts of hypocritical if I didn't talk to her about it and tell her "yes, I've done it, this is what it's about, and this is what you need to know should you make that choice for yourself" - I don't think smoking anything in front of kids is a good idea though, mostly because it's unattractive and doesn't impart the image id like to project to my kiddo.
I've always been open with the joeys about smoking, pot, drinking , sex etc. my 17 year old came home from a concert & TOLD me that her & her friends had smoked some dope. It wasn't much ( she said!) & she definitely wasn't stoned. We talked about it, etc, but I didn't see the big deal. (other than she's 17 & therefore illegal). I think if you make it a huge 'sky falling down' issue , the more attractive it becomes. Oh yeah legal here , not to 17 year olds obvs.
Prob not a popular answer, but I do sneak the occasional toke when I have some time to myself! It is legal here, I am a mom if 3, and I do smoke, but never in front of my kids... I have drank mimosa's in front of kids if having brunch, hubby drinks beer in front of kids also. I always drive if he has been drinking tho. I never have more than 2 drinks unless kids are gone overnight!
I put on wrong thread but I said basically it's hard to believe everyone here really has only had one drink in front of kids. I mean come on. Holidays stuff like that? Not all nut certainly a third glass happens once in a a while.
I smoke Every single night, just not in front of them. . there's a DARE program here in the schools that teaches them of the dangers of drugs. When theyre older we'll be able to explain the difference between "drugs" and "pot"
I don't get shit-faced in front of children. If parents are stupid enough to bring their kids into a sports bar, for instance, then the onus is on them. Either accept that drunken sports fans are going to act like jackasses or keep your kids elsewhere. In short, kids don't belong in bars. Period.
Reno - good grief, those little blighters drive you to drinking in front of them. Sometimes the need to be pleasantly anaesthetised from their presence is all consuming.
My suggestion is to not smoke - anything - in front of children. Drink what you want in front of the children; they don't need to know what it is, whether it's alcoholic etc. Not their business. Also, having a drink with dinner is a civilized norm.
"In Europe parents drink wine at dinner all the time, and I think they don't have as many alcoholic poisoning and binge drinking as we do."
This is complete crap courtesy of the American Inferiority Complex. (Oh those Yurps are just soo much better than we are.) That being said, drinking alcohol responsibly is one of the joys of civilization that is ruined by barbarians throughout the world.
It's true and not true. The statistics surrounding alcohol related deaths in the US vs Europe indicate that more US citizens die of closer alcohol related deaths (drunk driving, binge drinking) while more European citizens die of alcohol-related illnesses (cirrhosis, cancer). The working theory deals with our higher age limits and sometimes puritanical approach to alcohol.
I personally have never understood how someone can be 18 years old, buy cigarettes, vote for president, die for their country, but can't have a legal glass of wine or a beer. It mystifies alcohol and turns it into forbidden fruit.
I tried a pot brownie this weekend and never again.We'd go through a green light(sober driver) and I'd turn my head and see we're going thought the same set of lights.Then when i was home alone, i stayed in the bathroom. One point I was going through a religious experience I guess..haha. Said I wasn't ready to go and felt a squeeze on my shoulder. I didn't get to sleep til about 8 a.m with the help of an ativan. Never again. I'm not a person who likes to lose control and I had. Sorry for the long post.
Pot is legal in Seattle where I live. Answer: I don't view it ant differently than smoking in front of children, which is something I wouldn't do to growing lungs.
I've never smoked, but I think it must be really hard to tell your kids not to smoke if you smoke in front of them the whole time they're growing up. All of my brothers and my sister started smoking really, really young. My mom would bitch at them for stealing her cigarettes, but it was more important for her to be their buddy than parent.
If a kid grows up in a house where adults are smoking every day they grow up thinking it's normal and ok. All of my sister's kids smoke, none of mine do.
We drank in front of our kids when they were growing up, but it was a special occasion thing, not a daily thing.
Why would so many people jump to post on this thread only to say they don't do either? Hella useless to the discussion yo. It would be like me commenting on all those t.v shows people go one about here that I've never watched...smh.
No and no. Uncool.
ReplyDeleteDitto auntliddy, no and no - not cool at all.
ReplyDeleteWell, I don't have kids, I don't drink, and I have no desire to do pot (I tried it years ago, and could not detect any effect it was having on me other than making me cough,) so it's a really moot question.
ReplyDeleteI wouldn't smoke anything at all in front of my son. I don't drink in front of my kiddo either but his dad does. I'm kind of on the fence about that.
ReplyDeleteNo and no.
ReplyDeleteI don't think smoking anything in front of kids is a good idea, but you'll pry dinnertime glass of wine from cold, dead hands.
ReplyDeleteIt is legal here, and no - I wouldn't smoke in front of kids. I don't think they should be subjected to secondhand smoke. I will drink a glass of wine or beer in front of kids, but won't get drunk in front of them. The difference is one has a secondary effect on people in the vicinity, and the other doesn't.
ReplyDeleteI don't have kids and if I did, I wouldn't smoke anything in front of them. I do think it's a good thing to drink in moderation in front of kids to set an example of responsible drinking behavior. If they're used to seeing their parents with a glass of wine a or a beer with dinner, it's less of a forbidden fruit later on.
ReplyDelete17 yr old V jr 1 drinks in front of me these days.
ReplyDeleteI'm not into drugs so no but I hope that those who indulge don't do it in front of kids.
ReplyDeleteEnty: drinking & smoking pot are not the same, you can't catch a contact high from a beer.
Pot IS legal here in Washington state. I don't know any parents who would smoke it in front of their kids. No way. But I suppose something like socioeconomics would dictate who would allow kids to that type of exposure. Ive certainly got friends in low places, but I guess not that low?
ReplyDeleteI don't smoke but am for the legalization of marijuana. If I did I wouldn't do it in front of my kids. I know that will sound hypocritical based on my next statement but it is how I feel.
ReplyDeleteI drink very infrequently (one drink, 2-3 times a year) and have done so in front of my teenage daughter. I used to never drink in front of her, but then read an article about giving kids an example of people who do drink, but never to excess.
All, how is drinking responsibly different than smoking a joint responisibly? Slcohol is a drug as well. Algho most likely they will come in more contact with alcohol than pot. Idk. Glad my kids are grown.
DeleteAs I said, I knew it would sound hypocritical of me. The main reason is the 2nd hand smoke issue. If I have a drink in front of her there is nothing that rubs off on her. If I smoke in front of her there is 2nd hand exposure.
DeleteObviously young children is never a good thing but an adult, responsible child, sure. My dad came clean to me at about 17 and it made our relationship better. Opened the lines of communication and all that good stuff.
ReplyDeleteI would have a glass of wine or a beer in front of the kids at a wedding or something, but they've never seen me drunk.
ReplyDeleteI'd only use a vaporizer if the kids were gone on a weekend.
My dad smoked in front of me growing up and was offering it to me by 15. Really shitty parenting.
I don't have kids so I'd smoke away!
ReplyDeleteIt's legal here and I have no kids!!
ReplyDeleteMy feeling is that if you have to hide something you're doing from your kids then you probably shouldn't be doing it.
ReplyDeleteIF I smoked pot I wouldn't do it in the same room with them but I wouldn't hide the fact that I did it from them. My parents did that with me and all it does is breed mistrust. It teaches them to go behind your back. I'd rather know what my hypothetical kids are doing.
As far as alcohol goes a glass or two is no big deal to drink in front of kids. Although I'd never get drunk in front of my hypothetical kids.
"Hypothetical" kids being the key words here. If/when u have kids and its legal to smoke, I think your position on smoking in front of them will probably change- maybe not-
Delete1) No.
ReplyDelete2) 1-2 beers if I'm at a party w/ my son or with a meal I just grilled up. I did get liquored up at a wedding with him once, but it was walking distance from the hotel and I didn't get sloppy.
This is so interesting to me because there are so many people in my world with children who are all into smoking pot. They all do it on the dl, but I feel like that just makes everyone a big ole' hypocrite. For me, if I need to hide a behavior (other than sexay times) from my kid, then I'm not being the best mom I could be. I am not and never have been into pot. Not even when I was a young, impressionable 18-year-old in the 90s and EVERYONE smoked pot. The same people who I mention above always tell me I "MUST" try pot. Eyeroll. It's like they're totally judging me that I'm not on the pot bandwagon. Honestly, the whole marijuana thang just makes me feel like I'm in high school again. And I'm pushing 40!! People get so immature as they age.
ReplyDeleteI do drink wine in front of my son. I love my wine. And, I hope my son loves to appreciate wine when he's at the right age.
I just wonder about parents who smoke on the dl. That includes pot and ciggies. Don't you think you're kids are going to figure it out? Kids are not that dumb.
Oh well, to each his own.
I don't have children, but if and when I do I wouldn't smoke in front of them (or even with them in the house). As for alcohol, I'd follow Cathy's and All Lace no Leather's example. Everything in moderation.
ReplyDelete@sifichick
ReplyDelete@Susan
You make a good point, ladies.
I grew up in a house with an alcoholic. Yeah, I learned to stay out of kicking distance when dad smelled funny.
ReplyDeleteI don't do either at all, so I don't have to "hide" it. To each their own though.
Veronica- hmm, also grew up with alcoholic, but no physical abuse. But i dont drink, my husband doesnt, and while i didnt do that on purpose, i dont guess it was an accident either. My inhappy memories are of the idiotic fights my parents wld have while HE was drunk and she wasnt. Even as a kid i used to think, why is she trying to have a rational conversation with someone who isnt rational. Very unpleasant memories.
DeleteNormally I go to the extra effort to make sure I don't smoke cigarettes or weed in the vicinity of children, but this weekend was a different story. If you bring your 4 children <6yo to a DMB Caravan and sit them in the crowd on the lawn that's on you.
ReplyDeleteWhy wasn't I invited to this, brea? Rude :(
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
DeletePot is legal here in WA and I have a med marijuana card. My son is 18 and he does smoke pot, but I still don't vape in front of him. He knows I do, and has walked by my bedroom when I do and it's no big deal but I still am private about it. As for drinking, there's nothing wrong with drinking in moderation in front of the kid, wine at dinner or a cocktail if we're out to eat (this is my husband I don't really drink) and I actually think it's better to do in front of the kid hide it so the kid learns MODERATION. In Europe parents drink wine at dinner all the time, and I think they don't have as many alcoholic poisoning and binge drinking as we do.
ReplyDeleteLead by example!
ReplyDeleteOh yeah! Totes! I plan to always get blasted around my future kiddos! It keeps their expectations and dreams in check, while keeping my obliterated enough that I can almost forget their very existence!!! If I'm lucky enough, we can even end up the next big family of GANJAPRENEURS!!! California needs it's very own "family of pot!"
ReplyDeleteI am a fellow Washington stater and I voted for legalization. I am not a big drinker, but my 3-year old has seen me have a beer or hard cider at bbq's or family get-togethers and she knows it's for grown-ups, just like coffee. I do not drink liquor in general save for the VERY occasional mixed drink at adult only gatherings, but I would not do so in my home because my tolerance is really low and as a responsible parent, I cannot in good conscious render myself that incapable of handling an emergency situation as I would be if I drank hard liquor and my daughter needed me to be a present parent. That said, I have always been of the mindset that kids are gonna do what they're gonna do whether you tell them no or not, so the best thing I can do is inform her of her decisions and hope she makes good choices, as well as hope against hope that she realizes that I will always be there for her if she DOES over-indulge and do so without judgment.
ReplyDeleteAs for pot... Pot SHOULD BE regulated as strictly as alcohol, and there are numerous studies that indicate that a child who smokes or inhales or otherwise imbibes THC too early (pre-20/21) has an increased chance for decreased brain function and growth. I don't buy the "gateway drug" bullshit, but someone should be old enough to understand the possible effects of smoking too much, too young, and understand that long-term THC consumption can have negative effects on brain function. Alcohol is just as bad in certain respects, and in fact I enjoy pot more than booze, and responsible consumption is key.
Back to the question, my daughter has never seen me imbibe pot and I plan to keep it that way until she's much older, but having both smoked and drank, I would be all sorts of hypocritical if I didn't talk to her about it and tell her "yes, I've done it, this is what it's about, and this is what you need to know should you make that choice for yourself" - I don't think smoking anything in front of kids is a good idea though, mostly because it's unattractive and doesn't impart the image id like to project to my kiddo.
I've always been open with the joeys about smoking, pot, drinking , sex etc. my 17 year old came home from a concert & TOLD me that her & her friends had smoked some dope. It wasn't much ( she said!) & she definitely wasn't stoned. We talked about it, etc, but I didn't see the big deal. (other than she's 17 & therefore illegal). I think if you make it a huge 'sky falling down' issue , the more attractive it becomes.
ReplyDeleteOh yeah legal here , not to 17 year olds obvs.
My 17 year old just told me she just smoked her first.
Delete^ she didn't drive home. I dont smoke pot. Joeys have seen me drink occasionally.
ReplyDeleteThe only reason I wouldn't smoke in front of kids is because they could get a contact high. Drinking in front of them is different.
ReplyDeleteProb not a popular answer, but I do sneak the occasional toke when I have some time to myself! It is legal here, I am a mom if 3, and I do smoke, but never in front of my kids... I have drank mimosa's in front of kids if having brunch, hubby drinks beer in front of kids also. I always drive if he has been drinking tho. I never have more than 2 drinks unless kids are gone overnight!
ReplyDeleteTo clarify, that's if brunching at HOME! I am proud to be able to say I NEVER drive if drinking & will always offer to be the designated driver!
DeleteI put on wrong thread but I said basically it's hard to believe everyone here really has only had one drink in front of kids. I mean come on. Holidays stuff like that? Not all nut certainly a third glass happens once in a a while.
ReplyDelete^^^ I know right.
DeleteI smoke Every single night, just not in front of them. . there's a DARE program here in the schools that teaches them of the dangers of drugs. When theyre older we'll be able to explain the difference between "drugs" and "pot"
ReplyDeleteI don't get shit-faced in front of children. If parents are stupid enough to bring their kids into a sports bar, for instance, then the onus is on them. Either accept that drunken sports fans are going to act like jackasses or keep your kids elsewhere. In short, kids don't belong in bars. Period.
ReplyDeleteReno - good grief, those little blighters drive you to drinking in front of them. Sometimes the need to be pleasantly anaesthetised from their presence is all consuming.
ReplyDeleteAnd pot smoking is different/worse because of secondhand smoke effects. That's a no no matter the circumstance. It should be legalized, however.
ReplyDeleteViolet, Right?!
ReplyDeleteMy suggestion is to not smoke - anything - in front of children. Drink what you want in front of the children; they don't need to know what it is, whether it's alcoholic etc. Not their business. Also, having a drink with dinner is a civilized norm.
ReplyDeleteDrinking responsibly is different than smoking a joint responsibly because there's no second-hand smoke from a drink.
ReplyDelete"In Europe parents drink wine at dinner all the time, and I think they don't have as many alcoholic poisoning and binge drinking as we do."
ReplyDeleteThis is complete crap courtesy of the American Inferiority Complex. (Oh those Yurps are just soo much better than we are.)
That being said, drinking alcohol responsibly is one of the joys of civilization that is ruined by barbarians throughout the world.
It's true and not true. The statistics surrounding alcohol related deaths in the US vs Europe indicate that more US citizens die of closer alcohol related deaths (drunk driving, binge drinking) while more European citizens die of alcohol-related illnesses (cirrhosis, cancer). The working theory deals with our higher age limits and sometimes puritanical approach to alcohol.
DeleteI personally have never understood how someone can be 18 years old, buy cigarettes, vote for president, die for their country, but can't have a legal glass of wine or a beer. It mystifies alcohol and turns it into forbidden fruit.
I tried a pot brownie this weekend and never again.We'd go through a green light(sober driver) and I'd turn my head and see we're going thought the same set of lights.Then when i was home alone, i stayed in the bathroom. One point I was going through a religious experience I guess..haha. Said I wasn't ready to go and felt a squeeze on my shoulder. I didn't get to sleep til about 8 a.m with the help of an ativan. Never again. I'm not a person who likes to lose control and I had. Sorry for the long post.
ReplyDeleteETA: My son is anti drug and would be shocked by what i did. He'll never know.
ReplyDeleteLola - Ha ha. OMG. I love your recollection of the experience. I'm still laughing.
ReplyDeletePot is legal in Seattle where I live. Answer: I don't view it ant differently than smoking in front of children, which is something I wouldn't do to growing lungs.
ReplyDeleteUm nothing would kill my buzz more then my kids asking me 10 million questions.
ReplyDeleteI've never smoked, but I think it must be really hard to tell your kids not to smoke if you smoke in front of them the whole time they're growing up. All of my brothers and my sister started smoking really, really young. My mom would bitch at them for stealing her cigarettes, but it was more important for her to be their buddy than parent.
ReplyDeleteIf a kid grows up in a house where adults are smoking every day they grow up thinking it's normal and ok. All of my sister's kids smoke, none of mine do.
We drank in front of our kids when they were growing up, but it was a special occasion thing, not a daily thing.
Oh, and no I would never smoke pot in front of my kids no matter how old they were.
ReplyDeleteWhy would so many people jump to post on this thread only to say they don't do either? Hella useless to the discussion yo. It would be like me commenting on all those t.v shows people go one about here that I've never watched...smh.
ReplyDelete