Wednesday, July 09, 2014

Shocker! Lindsay Lohan Missing Rehearsals For Play

Did anyone really expect Lindsay Lohan to follow through on this whole play thing? According to Star, the actress, who is currently in NYC has been missing rehearsals and when she did show up she was late and unprepared. All the other actors hate her and the director too, but the producers want her because she will bring in people. Umm, yeah, to see a train wreck. Acting in a play requires actual acting talent to be any good. There are no cuts. There are no do overs. There are not a million chances to get one line right. At this point I will be shocked if Lindsay even bothers to do this play after all and will blame it on something other than herself and how she just wants a real chance to do something.

45 comments:

  1. Damn and those tickets are sitting on my mantelpiece.

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  2. Why is her face always so bloated? is that not reversible? Can she not get some sorta surgery to stop it? She will never get a movie role with that bloated chin etc

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    Replies
    1. Booze & coke bloat.

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    2. It's only reversible if you stop drinking and using :)

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  3. So what did the producers base her talent on two crappy appearances on SNL? Which is all cue card reading.

    I'm sure Lindsay will have a bout of mercury poisoning once she cashes those checks and drops out.

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  4. She has a great talent for generating publicity, which for a play is half the battle. Even if she never shows, we all know about it now.

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  5. Dumbest Producers ever.

    Morning, all. TTM, what's the Manilow song to celebrate Pammies divorce?

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    1. Morning Gweeds! Let's not call it celebrating divorce, it's Sanctimony Day and the knives are out. Let's call it Everybody Better Off. And as for music, I know I did it yesterday, but I have to go with...

      Oh Pammy

      You came and you gave (your vagina) without taking (a cut)

      But I pushed you away, ohhhwoah

      Pammy

      I luff Pammy, I hope she's able to find a better support system.

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  6. I've just always got to say thank you when Ent uses my very favorite Lilo picture in a post. ^5 Enty! Tripping Lilo is and will forever more be a classic.

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    1. @Fru, Mine is probably the one where she falls on the cactus.

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    2. @LC - respect!

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  7. she can't very well bring in people if she's not fucking there. which she won't be. whoever had this brainy idea is a moron.

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  8. Maybe she'll get pregnant again.

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    1. It was a miscarriage CoBe!!! Jesus christ on a cracker! ! Let the woman grieve properly!!

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  9. Really ? Why does anyone bother ?

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  10. Plays require many rehearsals, knew she wouldn't do it. She doesn't want to actually act, she wants to go out with friends & have the VIP entrance & the free stuff & the awards & the red carpet.

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  11. Let's face it, she'll still sell tonnes of tickets and then make the understudy FAMOUS!

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    Replies
    1. That understudy won the lottery.
      Shine on you crazy diamond! !

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  12. Why would they even hire her? Duh.

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  13. She won't move a single ticket when she's fired before opening night.

    Stunt move. Based on ratings for her last two tv misadventures I cant imagine - numerically speaking - that she could move more than handful of tickets. There is no unmet, pent up economic demand for her acting.

    TTM, you are my Barely Manenuf go to for Trivia Gamfe Nite.

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  14. Meh. Same story, different outfit.

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  15. @Frufra my absolutely favorite too...I laughed for days, maybe weeks over this one. Such a classic but pretty much all Liz and Dick era ones are.

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  16. I am so happy she made it to 28.

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  17. What is going on in that picture??

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    1. She's tripping, AngelBear. We're allowed to laugh because it's Lindsay!

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  18. (in raspy voice) It's Lindsay!

    LOL I love The Soup

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  19. @Fru my favorite pic is the pink fur with her trademark blowing-the-kiss face. A close second is the meth mouth one.

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  20. If she is in the US right now, then of course she missed rehersals. The producers must have let her go, and are maybe now spinning the story about what a trouble maker she is. Even if she did go to a couple of early rehersals, how could she fuck that up? They are basically just line readings. It isn't until later that they get more involved and intense. And usually by the end of them, any actor can play any part because not only do they know their own lines, they know everyone elses.

    And if I was in London, I would buy tickets to go see this.

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  21. ETA, I did see her last movie The Canyons. I liked it actually, even though the story was a mish mash genre's, it was pretty good. And Lilo, wasn't that bad in it. Not Oscar bait, but she didn't embarrass herself.

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    1. Really, Basil? I thought it was terrible and she was just...and I was a kinda fan when I watched it. James Deen was worse, though

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  22. Just remember, Linds, mercury poisoning is taken. Go with something more believable like Shame (wait, nope, she couldn't have that).

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  23. Beam in on me baby,
    and we’ll beam together
    I know we always been together,
    but there’s more.

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  24. Wow...I must be psychic!!! I predicted this. I also predicted her understudy would be working steadily.

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  25. Tickets may sell well early on precisely because of Linsays train wreck of a life and ability to score press. Easy money upfront and an able understudy as back up. Producers have a play on in the West End of London and satisfied investors. They may not be so dumb after all.

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  26. She can try that fish thing piven tried to shovel out. And who the hell is surprised? She's paz de la huerta with plainer name.

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  27. The entire popularity of these "Plays" puzzles me. Why would humans want to watch people reciting lines in front of cheaply made props on a small stage while being able to see the inner workings of the performance? Technology has vastly improved to the point where even a lowly meatbag can produce almost lifelike representations on film stock. These representations allow for more opportunities to allow the performers achieve perfection. Perhaps it is the odds of the performers not achieving the standard definition of "Acceptable" that brings crowds to these live performances. It is what you would call "Humorous" that humans are drawn more to the failures of one another than the success of them. This would also explain why working together is such a problem for your species and would explain why your laughable reign as the top species on the planet is coming to an end.

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    Replies
    1. Is this like the episode of Friends where Joey uses a thesaurus?

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  28. Blowing fat, middle-aged, Middle Eastern hoteliers or memorizing lines?

    I would be studying that script, but that's just me...

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  29. Her role in Speed the Plow doesn't require any acting talent. It was originated by Madge.

    Rehearsing and doing eight shows a week does require some self-discipline and a work ethic which Madge has and Lindsay doesn't. She'll never be able to do it. One of her rich johns probably put money into the production in return for services rendered.

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  30. I bet her understudy doesn't mind.

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  31. Classic pic, thumbs up!

    Didn't read all the comments - so not sure this has been covered before - but when you're a perpetual boozehound, your face is bloated the day after a heavy night of drinking.

    (personal experience, sadly)

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