Monday, July 14, 2014

Man Wants To Make Daughter A Princess - Claims Land In Africa

Talk about being a daddy's girl. Jeremiah Heaton promised his 6 year old daughter that he would make her a princess. So, the Virginia man traveled to a disputed portion of the world between Egypt and Sudan and claimed it for himself and immediately anointed his daughter a princess. The land is about the only portion of the world that is unclaimed by anyone. Sudan and Egypt both want it, but because of some former treaties, do not do anything about the situation. Heaton says that he plans to try and have his claim formally recognized. His two other children were not given royal titles but were presumably given t-shirts that said my sister is a princess.

Posted by ent lawyer at 8:15 AM

70 comments:

  1. TalksTooMuch8:16 AM

    And all the other dads on the block with daughters shot him.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. SugarTitz1:07 PM

      Right??
      Like what are you going to get me for my birthday dad??
      Gives new meaning to a princess party huh??

      Delete
    2. TalksTooMuch1:10 PM

      Emily got a WHOLE NATION, Dad!! I want a a Barbie Castle at LEAST!

      Delete
  2. Frufra8:17 AM

    Oh my. Here's hoping none of this guy's kids turn up in my class.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Rivenisahasbeen8:17 AM

    This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Violet8:18 AM

    That's sort of a peculiar thing to do. Odd people in this world.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Violet8:19 AM

      Mind you, you can buy any old title in this country. We have a Lord somebody who rings up work. He has as much connection to royalty as I do ( which is none).

      Delete
    2. Zsa Zsa4:27 PM

      Lord Disick?

      Delete
  5. Zilla38:19 AM

    The king got his ass kicked. Long live the king.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Rivenisahasbeen8:22 AM

    Wow. I just can't even...

    Here's some parenting advice: tell the brat to face reality. She's a nobody, she'll likely continue to be a nobody, but maybe if she aims for something other than privileged entitlement, she might end up as a bit more than a nobody.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. SugarTitz1:12 PM

      Ouch!! Way harsh Tye!!!

      Delete
    2. Rivenisahasbeen1:52 PM

      Hey, in some parts of the universe, maybe not in contempo-casual, but in some parts, it's considered cool to know what's going on in the world.

      Delete
  7. Michael8:24 AM

    You can actually buy a landed title. Seems much safer and cheaper than traveling to disputed lands in Africa. I once thought about buying my ex a title as a "Countess" because she certainly acted like she already was one

    ReplyDelete
  8. Unknown8:24 AM

    It's about as bad as how sewer rats (aka Madams, prostitutes, pimps, mafiosos) buy themselves titles as Baron/Baroness, Count/Countess - to make them "legit" elite.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Lurker Girl8:26 AM

    Michael....would you buy me a title? Please, pretty please with sugar?

    ReplyDelete
  10. Shelly Shell8:28 AM

    Zsa Zsa's hubby bought his title. He could've just done somethig like that for her birthday. What he is doing is stupid & dangerous, this is more about him being a big important man, than his daughter.

    ReplyDelete
  11. StewMcG8:29 AM

    Since he made himself King and his daughter Princess, doesn't that invalidate their US citizenship? Isn't there something in the constitution against a US citizen holding of a title of nobility?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Nipple4:16 PM

      Americans can have dual citizenship. But a dual citizen cannot run for public office.

      Delete
  12. Terri8:34 AM

    I'm not sure renouncing her ciitzenship would be worth it.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Lurker Girl8:34 AM

    Title of Nobility Amendment..and I quote:

    ""If any citizen of the United States shall accept, claim, receive or retain any title of nobility or honor, or shall, without the consent of congress, accept and retain any present, pension, office or emolument of any kind whatever, from any emperor, king, prince or foreign power, such person shall cease to be a citizen of the United States, and shall be incapable of holding any office of trust or profit under them, or either of them."

    ReplyDelete
  14. Meanie Rhysie8:37 AM

    This is making me stabby. Idiot.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Gayeld8:41 AM

    Kind of creepy, really.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Unknown8:42 AM

    this little girl will grow up to sue her parents for college tuition. ~sigh~

    ReplyDelete
  17. jane31138:44 AM

    That girl will be very well adjusted and have lots of friends.

    Just kidding - she's probably already a nightmare. This story would only be somewhat ok if we found out she was dying.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. TalksTooMuch8:48 AM

      You know it's a bad story when only a dying 6 year old will save it

      Delete
    2. Meanie Rhysie9:09 AM

      Is it bad I cracked up, @jane? I'm going to hell, aren't I? Good thing I don't believe...

      Delete
  18. Shelly Shell8:51 AM

    Most people would just throw a Disney Princess birthday party.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Kat has left the building10:46 AM

      @shelly Party City was all sold out of the Disney Princess paper plate decorations so he did the next best thing

      Delete
    2. SugarTitz1:16 PM

      This soooo beats Frozen

      Delete
  19. Now!8:53 AM

    I would imagine that if he got kidnapped on this little jaunt to a disputed territory, he would expect the U.S. military to come get him out. What a great use of tax dollars that would be.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Susan8:55 AM

    This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Susan8:55 AM

    Doesn't this make any of you wonder if the dad is mentally ill? I mean this just seems cray.

    ReplyDelete
  22. timebob 8:57 AM

    @Lurker the amendment has never been ratified so yes, you can hold a royal title and still be an American Citizen, many people marry or buy into royalty.

    Most people mix up the fact that the US Government cannot give out royal titles.

    So there will never ever be a King of America.

    ReplyDelete
  23. timebob 8:59 AM

    and FWIW wouldn't of been easier to spend $19.95 and name a fake star after her?

    ReplyDelete
  24. Eros9:05 AM

    Lol.. I think its rather cute, admirable and noble in this day and age of bad and nonexistent parents.

    This guy wanted to show his daughter just how special and loved she is by fulfilling her wish to be a princess. I think that's pretty awesome.

    ReplyDelete
  25. TigeRLiLy9:09 AM

    What a p.o.s. all the people in Africa that could use a safe place to live....use that kind of motivation to build a shelter....create a health care center.....nope steal more land so your spoiled brat innocent daughter can be raised in the same delusion you exist in :/

    ReplyDelete
  26. Sarah9:12 AM

    Assholes being assholes, and breeding assholes

    ReplyDelete
  27. Cornbread9:40 AM

    He could have at least created a better flag.

    I wonder how his other two children feel? I wonder if they're boys? Is he married, and what does his wife think? For such a stupid little blurb, I now feel the need to waste a lot of time reading about them.

    ReplyDelete
  28. The Real Dragon9:42 AM

    Lmao why ya all going after this little girl tho. It's the dad whose the dummy

    ReplyDelete
  29. discoflux9:46 AM

    They're probably going to end up having one of those weird father/daughter wedding things eventually. I'd call this a slightly unhealthy obsession with his daughter, but that's just my uninformed opinion.

    ReplyDelete
  30. Michael10:10 AM

    Lurkergirl that has never been ratified so it is not enforced. You can buy a Scottish Barony or several other titles but they will not be much good except for making your correspondence look really fancy and making your friends really envious. Come to think of it..., that sounds pretty good ;)

    ReplyDelete
  31. nancer10:24 AM

    and people wonder why kids are spoiled, entitled brats. it's parents like this that create them.

    ReplyDelete
  32. shakey10:38 AM

    And people wonder why Americans are hated in that part of the world.

    ReplyDelete
  33. Scarlett Drawl10:48 AM

    When they end up kidnapped or killed, don't waste my tax dollars saving them.

    ReplyDelete
  34. Frosty10:54 AM

    Jerk.

    ReplyDelete
  35. Cheryl10:58 AM

    So not only is he getting his daughter to buy into the Disney style princess fantasy, he is teaching her to be a spoiled diva whose needs are more important than everyone else's. Nice work, King Dumbass!

    ReplyDelete
  36. Cornbread11:12 AM

    He's married; both he and his wife refer to their daughter as Princess Emily. They bought her a tiara. The other two children are older boys. Sounds like dad is using the "king" title. Although this land is in the desert, they want to turn it into an agricultural hub so children in the region have enough food. And I've officially wasted too much time on this.

    ReplyDelete
  37. Dena11:40 AM

    I may have to buy some land in the area and commence some serious Game of Thrones style mayhem. Starting with finding my Khal Drogo.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. TalksTooMuch12:13 PM

      I'm not sure who that is, but if you find a Tyrion Lannister, I want an invite!

      Delete
    2. SugarTitz1:23 PM

      I want dibs on Jaime Lannister tyvm!!

      Delete
  38. Lissette11:44 AM

    Such a weird story...where to begin? Hm...seriously dad has isssues. Next, they have entitlement issues. this is why we have spoiled idiots growing up...
    next

    ReplyDelete
  39. 8====D KermitGossnellKnobjob12:14 PM

    Between Sudan and Egypt. Why don't you take her to chicago? they are closer to your house and the murder rate is just above.
    If he wanted to make her a noble/aristocratic person, more standard places like Scotland sell tiny pieces of their territory (100 square metres or so) with the right to be called Earl, Count, Duke or whatever of the place.

    ReplyDelete
  40. PugsterMom12:27 PM

    Gee, when I ask my daughter to do something for me that I could easily do myself, she asks me, "Would you like fries with that, Princess? " I'm royalty and didn't need to travel outside the U.S. to be so annointed.

    ReplyDelete
  41. Unknown12:41 PM

    I can't decide whether I think this is cute and sweet or foolishly demented. Apparently she wears her tiara everywhere. And has a custom-made princess bed. She kinda looks like a normal little girl, and it seems as if thinks was a family project. The boys are princes and the three kids worked together to design the flag, which the dad "planted" in the sand when he travelled there. So like I said, I can't decide. It is definitely unique, though.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Kat has left the building12:53 PM

      @mary ok I agree it's kind of cute that it was a family project except I don't think wearing a tiara everywhere is cute. But do this in your backyard, why does he have to go so over the top and ACTUALLY claim land for his little baby girl to rule over? Buy a corvette like a normal middle aged man. This is just too weird. I bet they send out the most annoying Christmas letters to eceryone who's addresses they get their hands on and imagine her birthday parties?

      Delete
  42. Miss Behavin12:55 PM

    With regard to Americans holding titles,I have a relation who is both a US citizen and a countess by virtue of marriage. It doesn't appear to be mutually exclusive.

    ReplyDelete
  43. Krissie1:05 PM

    Wearing a tiara everywhere isn't so bad for a 6-year-old. If she's still insisting on wearing it when she's 10 or 12 that will be a problem.

    I once read an article in "Cosmo" magazine about grown women who want to be princesses. They have events where they dress up and pretend to be princesses. Perhaps that's where this little girl is headed. It was creepy.

    ReplyDelete
  44. Unknown1:36 PM

    F****** white people

    ReplyDelete
  45. CowJam2:05 PM

    "The land is about the only portion of the world that is unclaimed by anyone Caucasian."
    There-fixed it for ya.
    That land is as "unclaimed" as the Palestinian Territories.

    ReplyDelete
  46. NaughtyNurse3:25 PM

    This is so unbelievably fucked up.

    ReplyDelete
  47. Honey Bunny5:33 PM

    My Lord! Some of you'll sound like the commentators from DM! She is just a kid. I think it's great he is showing his love for her any way possible. Also if you guys had a chance to make your little girl a princess than I know you would.

    ReplyDelete
  48. Amelia Merritt5:55 PM

    Has he SEEN Game of Thrones? This won't end well.

    ReplyDelete
  49. Henriette6:25 PM

    I hope Egypt and Sudan go after him.

    ReplyDelete
  50. Anonymous6:57 PM

    At least those poor starving African children will have some juicy American rubes to overthrow and then pig out on. Where do we donate to the kickstarter to get this guy a plane ticket stat?

    ReplyDelete
  51. CanadianMiss7:02 PM

    I wonder what the mother in the family feels about this

    ReplyDelete
  52. Erik7:06 PM

    Ugggghhhh...

    ReplyDelete
  53. Unknown11:21 PM

    If I were his daughter I would have told him "Daddy how much does that trip to Africa cost? Oh, really? Well, can I have an iPhone and an iPad and a pony with the money instead?"

    ReplyDelete
  54. Brian2:50 PM

    African princess sounds really cool, until the cliterectomy...

    ReplyDelete

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