December 11, 2013
There is a special salesperson at Barney's. She works in women's designer evening gowns. Apparently she is in very high demand from female celebrities. Our salesperson provides an intimate encounter in a dressing room that makes her one of the best selling sales people in the entire store. Yesterday this B list mostly television actress with A+ list name recognition stopped by and had the thirty minute special.
She is on a top 5 network show and is still in the process of getting divorced.
Knope?!??
ReplyDeleteNo guesses bueller?
ReplyDeleteWhat?! Barney's salesperson has sex with female celebrities to sell their outfits??
ReplyDeleteThat's a damn good blind. I never get that kind of service at JC Penny's or Pat Catans.
ReplyDeleteI wanna know this!! But alas I have nothing.
ReplyDeleteHey Courtney!!
ReplyDeleteIs this a more appropriate post to say Happy Mothers Day?
Hey @kristin!!
DeleteIt's supposed to be Poehler, right? DM just ran a story on her divorce to Arnett starting to get rolling. P&R definitely top 5 but I think Amy is A
ReplyDeleteDo you get extra points on your store card if tlyou pay for the 'full service'?
ReplyDeleteKatie Holmes was the popular guess btw
ReplyDeleteI didn't guess last time and I got nothing better now either. It would be awfully hard in a dressing room to be serviced. That's all I got to say about that!
ReplyDeleteHOT! I envision leaned up against the wall, ass out in the air, next to the 3way mirror so the celeb can watch the festivities going on back there.
ReplyDeleteWait a minute..."she is the best selling salespeople in the entire store?!?" Barney's is a high end undercover brother where the staff competes in ho-offs?!? AWESOME!! Is Detective Benson on the case yet?!
ReplyDeleteBest selling of the *
ReplyDelete@sherry idk - some nice department stores in my city's malls are large, with a shelf and a couch/chair. i'm sure a luxury store would almost have a little sink and vanity. plenty of room.
ReplyDeleteI live P&R, but it's low rated, not top 5. Anyone on those NCIS shows? Big Bang theory?
ReplyDeleteIf I went to Barney's in any city I could only hope a female asst. would even acknowledge I was in the store. Ever try getting help in these places?
ReplyDeleteOh please, this is such bullshit. They go to a dept. store to get some intimate time with a sales rep? Sure they do.
ReplyDeleteWell, "The Good Wife" films in NY, and I haven't checked, but I'm guessing it's Top 5 or pretty damned close.
ReplyDeleteSorry - meant to add that there was some kind of rumor floating around this weekend that Christine Baranski and her husband split.
ReplyDelete30 minutes? Dayum.
ReplyDeleteTop 10 TV shows (non reality)
ReplyDeleteNCIS
The Big Bang Theory
NCIS: Los Angeles
Blue Bloods
Person of Interest
Castle
NCIS: Pauley Perrette is divorced. Other actresses are not separated.
NCIS: LA: no idea
TBBT: Sara Gilbert has just married Linda Perry, Mayim Bialik divorced
Blue Bloods: Marisa Ramirez is divorced, Moynahan isn't separated,
POI: nothing about separation or divorce
Sylvia, maybe they go to get a gown, and the servicing is a perk! Like when I go get my hair cut, and I get a free hand massage. I need to get my ass back in stores! Amazon and Zappos have fast, free shipping, but a little nooky for actually shopping in stores is a GREAT perk!
ReplyDeleteSomeone from CSI: Las Vegas
ReplyDelete@NaughtyNurse - you get a free hand massage when you get your hair cut?? I get tea. Think I need an upgrade!!
ReplyDeleteI would think that a major celebrity would get treated like a VIP in a place like Barneys. They have huge dressing rooms, sometimes will serve champagne as you shop and apparently more!!
I sure hope Amy P. is getting hers!!
Yep, teresa. Tea, hand massage and a little lip gloss on the way out the door!
ReplyDeleteI think this is Julie Bowen...
ReplyDeleteDivorce isn't public yet
Parks and recreation was never top 5
ReplyDeleteNot Amy P
It's still Betty White!
ReplyDeleteLol, don't believe it for a second. Some horny sales assist is living in a fantasy world whilst doing a low paid job at Barneys.
ReplyDeleteI like the Bowen guess, Tricia. That broad is so fidgety and hyper, she probably needs the "stress relief."
ReplyDeletei fucked a slow witted stockboy at K Mart, so it happens.
ReplyDeleteI figured Top 5 network show means the network is ABC, CBS, NBC, Fox, or CW, not that the show itself is in the top 5. I guess all signs point to Amy Poehler. Jane Lynch was still in the process of getting divorced when this blind was originally posted.
ReplyDeletei get the fealing julie bowen has been busy riding a lot of casting couches.. following in the hooka steps of sofia v
ReplyDeleteI just wonder how the salesperson finds out who might be interested in her 30 minute special. There are many ways that can be a bad conversation.
ReplyDelete@Mama Abroad: Probably like the massage whores. Graze something fun and an oops, a giggle and gauge the reaction.
ReplyDeleteWith a evening gown, which is what she is selling, it could be while putting nipple tape or a chicken cutlet on a chick. While tugging the dress this way or that, to get it set right. Tons of possibilities w/o a word needing to be spoken, besides "Ok I'll take it."
Employee that doubles as a prostitute in-store: NO PROBLEM
ReplyDeleteYoung black guy buys a belt: CALL THE COPS!!!
I'm just glad I think this blind is fiction.
@Zach That's how I read it too.
ReplyDelete98% of these blinds are fiction (2% are right out of sheer statistics or what is known as "The Jeanne Dixon formula"). The odds of a blind being correct are the same odds as Jesus appearing on toast, a Cheetoh or on a dog's ass. Still, it's been fun playing.
ReplyDelete@MadLyb, I believe--maybe--20% of the blinds.
DeleteThe rest is just like watching a soap.
No, I'd say a lot of the blinds are accurate. Not when they're written, of course.
ReplyDeleteOne: Write random, vague post.
Two: Wait for celebrity to do bad thing.
Three: Match them up.
Four: ???
Five: Profit!
I have to say, I don't quite understand how her oral services result in higher dress sales. Tips, or good reviews, sure. But if you go down on me in a dressing room, that will just be a pleasure, that won't make me want to turn around and buy a dress. An orgasm will not suddenly make me want a specific dress.
ReplyDeleteWould a salesperson at a high end joint like that get commission? That is how I would see it.
ReplyDeleteOk, well the way I'm reading this (if it's not complete fiction) is that the intimate service is provided on a referral basis and that by 'best selling' it's referring to the selling of the service, not gowns.
ReplyDelete