Blind Items Revealed
November 19, 2013
In a scene straight of Seinfeld this former B list boy bander and A list reality star who now is a C list reality star and married was getting changed at a photo shoot and didn't notice the two people off to the side who had a great angle and could not stop laughing at how small his equipment is. I guess we know why his A list celebrity/singer/reality star ex was always making peen jokes about him. The stylists who saw him said it was worse than Ken Jeong in The Hangover.
Nick Lachey/Jessica Simpson
So he's not a shower OR a grower? Oooompphhh
ReplyDeleteI guess he's a grower.
ReplyDeletecan he not get a surgery for that if his ding dong is THAT small?
ReplyDeleteCan you imagine the outrage if this was a blind about a woman with a cavernous...um...nether region?
ReplyDeleteThis is not cool, IMO.
I do feel bad penis shaming this loser on a Sunday morning. I think I'm out for the day
ReplyDeleteLOL @ Lady, stick around!
DeleteRemember that song by Gillette ---Dont want no short d**k man lol
ReplyDeleteI had forgotten that one. You wouldn't think you'd forget a song like that.
DeletePoor bastard :(
ReplyDeleteIt is unfair to judge a non-erect penis. Put away your sexist measuring devices, Enty.
ReplyDelete#teamlucas
Old news. There are photos online, I believe of his honeymoon with Vanessa.
ReplyDelete@Kristin--why is Lucas small?! lol
ReplyDeleteNo no! I was trying to be a decent human like Lucas.
DeleteObviously need to practice.
@Derek and @Kristin - I am perfectly content with the size of my equipment. And haven't had any complaints about it either.
DeleteOh look, puppies!
ReplyDeleteno wonder he was so happy to marry a 'virgin'
ReplyDeleteSmirk*
DeleteThe two stylists are cornballs....but hey atleast Nicky gets to sleep with Vanessa so she must be ok with it. A size and shape for all.
ReplyDeletek---I know just joking
ReplyDeleteVIP likes em BIG.
ReplyDelete@Derek You know it! :)
DeleteYeezus! That was the size of a road cone!!!
DeleteYup. Heard this before. He's still a pretty good looking guy, and maybe is a grower. Whatevs.
DeleteKelly & Brenda got this, and Count wrote a novel about penis size in the original BI. You should read it!
ReplyDeleteAgreed must be a grower
ReplyDeleteAlso team Lucas, completely unrelated to the blind. I can't hashtag, though, because I am an old and that looks like a pound sign
@TTM - you hashtag all you like sweetie ... my 17-year-old niece told me I'm too old to use "totes" - said that it was "totes embarrassing" hearing me say it. Just for that, I'm going to do it constantly! Hee hee ...
DeleteDick shaming is deplorable. Besides, he has millions in the bank and only taps fine trim. I'd give an inch off my dick in exchange for that.
ReplyDelete@Derek: I have seen 2 surgeries, both w/ down sides. First one, they cut the suspension tendons that hold the dick up. This gives and extra inch or 2, but leaves you susceptible to injuries.
Second one I seen in a Russian amateur pic, and it was a mess. It resembled an over stuffed kelbasa, that looked like it was going to burst, and the head was put on wrong. Since there were scars, it had to be a surgery. If I can find the pic, I'll post it.
Oh dear, Count - will you please make sure to let us know that is what you're posting when you do? I have no wish to be traumatized this early in the day without at least another six or seven mimosas!
DeleteNo, that's okay, @Count. We got the visual.
Delete@VIP lol---go big or go home!
ReplyDelete@Count---yuck I will take your word for it. Have you tried I think its called Jelqing?!
Oh shit I slept all the way to Friday last Saturday night (I swore it was just yesterday). :(
ReplyDeleteAhh yes. Kelly & Brenda... When the public dick swinging was fun.
ReplyDelete@sandyboo What the what? Are you bragging or asking for help?
Perhaps it was cold. I just got done shoveling snow. I am sure that my gentlemen's sausage(thanks Top Gear)has attempted to retreat.
ReplyDelete@Derek: No, I'm happy with my dick size. Besides, I seen some black guys in porn who went with the penis pump stretching. Seems to leave it floppy.
ReplyDeleteI bet his mouth is awesome.
ReplyDeletehe took 1/2 of Jessica and Papa Joe's money, his tiny peen laughed all the way to the bank
ReplyDelete'Roids can be hell.
ReplyDeletePoor Vanessa :(
ReplyDeleteWhoever wrote this blind obviously isn't male. I do not know any man who has the same sized penis all the time threw out the day. It changes all the time!
ReplyDeleteNo penis shaming here- just wanted to say, I watched that documentary "Unhung Hero", and it was freaking riveting. Gave me a different outlook on the insecurities and struggles men face in relation to the size of their junk.
ReplyDeleteProbably has an easier time talking gals into anal so good on him.
ReplyDeleteHA! The affliction does have its perks, Jane ;)
ReplyDeleteDick shaming bad, boob size shaming good. Got it.
ReplyDeleteI had an unfortunate encounter with a guy who on showed/growed the length of my thumb (I have small hands). What in the world to you do with that? A miserable evening was what I got.
ReplyDelete@Fleuhr: Lil boobs are cute and lots of times are followed around by a sweet ass. Aint no shame in that.
ReplyDeleteMaybe I'm humourless but I don't see the point in making fun of a guy for his equipement size. It's not like he chose what he got or can do much to change it. Besides which size isn't always everything, this is such a thing as too big!
ReplyDeleteDick shaming- bad
ReplyDeleteWhore shaming- good
That's how we do it around here, correct?
Maybe the CDANers can post up a list of acceptable shaming?
Maybe I missed that day? I am a pretty busy lady..
+1000 what Meanie Rhysie, rosie riveter, Rosso, etc. said. Why is this OK, exactly?
ReplyDeleteRadio silence?
ReplyDeletehey, ray. texas rose, ttm, count, lucas, anyone...? can any of you staunch count supporters let me know what we can and cannot shame? Im dying for a list. All a sudden this has taken an interesting twist...
ReplyDeletepenis shaming is deplorable? Bwahahahahaha
but go ahead and call someones wife/daughter/mother a whore?
OH_KAY
I'll tell you what - as bad as you say people are around here no one has tossed out any homophobic slurs at you. Because while you may disagree with their choice of words (and Count did a good job of explaining how he applies the term correctly - IIRC he usually refers to women as 'broads'), they have done a fairly good job of being above-board and only hurling insults at you that are on the level of what you have dished out.
DeleteSo here's a comprehensive list of what it is okay to shame people about:
(see what I did there? Let's just be respectful to one another, especially here in the comments. Celebs know what they are getting into when they choose to become famous, so they are fair game within reason. But commenters don't deserve to be attacked for trying to participate. So let's just hug it out and call it a truce, shall we? You and Count can toss out the odd bon mot at each other but let's leave erryone else out of it. We cool?)
Ain't the size of your pencil but how you sign your name. And that really is true. More to sex than penetration and the most important equipment is your brain.
ReplyDelete#teamLucas
ReplyDeleteToo big can suck too.
ReplyDeleteOh gosh, this thread just had to get spilled over into, thanks @rosie - gosh you have a lot of time on your hands!
ReplyDeleteOkay, flaccid penis size has NOTHING to do with erect size. Mr. Figgy looks like a mushroom when soft, but grows (thank goodness) to an impressive and satisfying size. Quite the transformation.
ReplyDeleteI do not condone body shaming, but sometimes, with some guys, there really is absolutely nothing you can do with what you were given. I once slept with a guy who I'm pretty sure couldn't penetrate a lipstick tube, let alone a vagina. With a boner, not flaccid mind you. It was a sad day, I really liked the guy and it was a long time coming (hehe I wish) but things after that were so awkward and once I got the past the idea of sexytimes I realized what an asshole he really was. I feel the same way about small penises as I do about large, there is a perfect fit for everyone.
ReplyDeleteThat being said, I just spent a shameful amount of time reading this article about men in Hollywood with small members,
That's mean! Poor guy. People who ridicule others for things they have no control over are assholes who never advanced beyond Junior High School.
ReplyDeleteYou have to watch out for stylists and make-up artists ... get them to sign an NDA pronto as they all talk!
ReplyDeleteFrom what I've seen of him, I think he's a sweetheart - gorgeous eyes, nice personality, good sense of humour, cool family ... the things that really matter when looks fade and you move into that stage of life when just a cuddle will do.
Nick Lachey and Enrique Iglesias can start their own Small Penis Club now!
ReplyDelete