Blind Item #5
This A+ list mostly movie actor was busted again by his wife for cheating. He just can't say no when he is surrounded by women. With his wife out of town he went for it and thought he was going to get away with it but one of the women left behind something that was very tough to explain.
Affleck?
ReplyDeleteCostner?
ReplyDeleteOr Dennis Quaid...
DeleteMcConaghey or Affleck
ReplyDeleteHer signed Amber Tamblyn book!!!!!
ReplyDeleteI'll vote Costner. This is what came to memory reading this.
ReplyDelete5 years ago, met my friend, just back from Montreal, we head to her house. Her partner is so happy she's back!! He made lunch! (Clue #1) We spend time greeting the cats, then go into the kitchen. Halfway though the lasagna, we hear "Brrroooowwwww! Brrrroooowwww!" The cat, carrying something, talking loudly, comes in.
"Oh, have you a new toy Jasper?" My friend leans over... and comes up with a diaphragm.
There is silence.
"Get the f*#k out." says she. He tried to tell her it was hers! She's just staring, then says "I have an IUD, dumbass!" Long horrible scene later, he tries to kick Jasper on the way out!
I still maintain Jasper hid the evidence for the big reveal.
Love the story!! My friend thought her husband was cheating, so drove to where she thought he wld be, and there was his car. She didnt do a thing except switch her car for his! Imagine when he came out??!!
DeleteAhh! I love that!! Good for your friend!! @auntliddy
DeleteWrite that cat into the will
DeleteThat is awesome! I thought the cat was going to be carrying panties, but a diaphragm...pure gold.
DeleteLove the car story. I'll have to file that away in case I ever suspect a man is cheating.
Great stories! Thanks for sharing!!
Deleteplease not my Ben! In my head he is the perfect man!
ReplyDeleteJust do what everyone else does when their fantasy crush does something bad, @soccer mom - sick your fingers in your ears, sing lah-lah-lah and go to your happy place.
DeleteI do this with Johnny Depp; in my head the last decade didn't happen for him. Oh and Alex Skarsgard is actually the book version of vampire Eric from the Southern Vampire Chrons. Mmmm ... book version Eric (up to ~4th book).
And viola! Happy place!
Wasn't Costner the reveal for another cheating blind? Something to do with golf courses?
ReplyDeletePerhaps she left him an std
ReplyDeleteAffleck, Garner was out of town with the Super Bowl promotion. Also saw Ben in DM wearing same clothes two days in a row. Walk of shame, bet she gave him a hickey or bite marks ;)
ReplyDeleteStd. Is proof enough. ..non???
Delete@auntliddy That is pure awesomessauce!
ReplyDelete@Sarah we thought he'd need a bodyguard for a while there!
I left my photo of Derek on the nightstand.
ReplyDeleteWas it a pony??
ReplyDeleteLOL @Mari and @auntliddy!
ReplyDeleteMy vote is on Ben. Enty implied that he was seen wearing the same clothes a few days in a row about a week ago. But maybe it is to easy to always guess Ben on the A+ actor cheater blinds?
I left the my love letter to Teresa by the hot tub.
ReplyDeletehi5 @Liddy! that's perfect
ReplyDeleteI left aemish's Rick Astley cd next to the fireplace.
ReplyDeleteI think Jennifer knew when she married Ben that he was a cheating, gambling dog, yet she did it, and had kids with him, anyway. She knows and is still willing to fight for him, so he must be worth it in some weird way. Hopefully the person he cheated with won't be able to be identified, for her sake.
ReplyDeleteI left Madlyb's bottle of Charlie perfume by the pool table.
ReplyDeleteWhat did she leave? Herpes?
ReplyDeleteI know we're not supposed to feed the trolls, but that Charlie perfume bit had me rolling!!
ReplyDeleteI left Frufra's copy of Good Housekeeping by the service entrance.
ReplyDeleteFrufra, have you noticed how some of the 'trolls' from various of those troll-days have stuck around as quite amusing commenters?
ReplyDeleteThe term 'troll' is so overused, if someone's alt personality is fun, then hurrah! Feed away.
LOL Alita!!!! Will do!
ReplyDeleteI left Alita's vintage bottle of Dark Eyes next to the jockey statue in the driveway.
ReplyDeleteI left soccer mom's pair of Jordache jeans in the dryer.
ReplyDeleteTwo great stories.
ReplyDeleteOh man now I want Kym to say what I left behind. Hate to admit but some of those were pretty funny and reminded me of Rach's witticisms.
ReplyDeleteWow I had to look that up - urban dictionary tells me that Dark Eyes is "cheap ass vodka."
ReplyDeleteAss vodka doesn't sound like it would taste very good.
I left Sherry's Medic Alert bracelet by the Clapper.
ReplyDeleteShe's fallen, and she can't turn the light on.
ReplyDeleteMe too Kym...me too!!!
ReplyDeleteDefinitely Ben Affleck - mention has been made of his rough and same-clothes appearance a few days ago; and the evidence would have been a mark on his body.
ReplyDeleteKym - i left my vomit all over your doona cover. sorry!
ReplyDeleteRe: brn - just read online whole family moving to detroit for summer while ben makes superman/boy/dude, whatever. Its a wise woman who knows her hubby.
ReplyDeleteAlita- dark eyes vodka would taste much better if it were made out of ass, I believe. I recall dark days drinking that in our teens when we couldn't afford decent stuff, and it tasted worse coming up, which was inevitable
ReplyDelete'' but one of the women left behind something that was very tough to explain.''
ReplyDeleteA live chicken? A child? STD? Panties? A car? A dead body?
Gawd Enty
That bitch defrosted a 7 lb beef loin, washed Jen's delicates out, by hand, then spritzed the linens with lavender water. No that's a sneaky ho.
ReplyDelete