Monday, January 06, 2014

The Goopster Wants To Lose 10 Or 15 Pounds

Look at the photo above. This was taken in the past few days of Gwyneth Paltrow. I don't see a woman in that photo who needs to lose weight. She apparently thinks otherwise because she is starting her cleanse with the goal of losing 10-15 pounds of what she calls holiday excess. What excess? If she loses 10-15 pounds she will be a skeleton. You could just throw a brown wig on her and have her start singing songs in Spanish and call her Marc Anthony. Can you imagine the body issues this woman has where she thinks she has weight to lose? What about her daughter? Do you think she makes Apple do these cleanses? Is something like this a form of child abuse? If you are constantly sending your child these images and ideas that can potentially lead to death how is it any worse than constantly smoking in front of your child or speeding on a motorcycle in front of packed school buses. Oh, wait she already does that. I would love a reporter to ask Gwyneth whether Apple has ever done a cleanse.

58 comments:

  1. Anonymous6:29 AM

    Look at that pot belly on her, though! (Joking - it's only slightly bulging).

    Never mind her weight; she needs to do something with that straw-coloured hair - it's vile!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Bulging? No. I hope that is a joke.

      Delete
    2. Anonymous9:21 AM

      @Lauren, yes, a joke. I should have put a winky face after my comment.

      She's frightfully thin ... her torso scares me.

      Delete
  2. Her ego must weigh at least that much. Maybe she could lose that?

    ReplyDelete
  3. Im more surprised she actually defiled her body with a teeny weeny tat (on her right pelvis)

    ReplyDelete
  4. @Stepforded, agree about the hair. I can't understand why celebrities with infinite resources don't invest in a proper dye job. Kate Hudson, I'm looking at you. Also Paul McCartney, the billionaire with a $4.99 box of Miss Clairol.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I don't understand how a person functions while cleansing.

    I also don't get the whole juicing craze. If I want to eat some kale, I'll just eat the damn kale.

    I understand her thoughts on feeling like a fat ass after the holidays, even if you are not a fat ass. All the boozing and cheese and crackers and heavy food can just make you feel not right. Don't people who cleanse claim it reinvigorates them, so maybe that's the benefit for her?

    ReplyDelete
  6. I read her tat is a c and Chris has a tiny g.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Answer to the smoking blind! Who wouldn't say they wanted to loose 10-15 pounds. I found old clothes in the closet from way back and remember thinking then I needed to loose weight. Crazy!

    ReplyDelete
  8. @Reno You can barely see it in the pic it's right next to the metal loop of her bikini barely showing

    ReplyDelete
  9. Anonymous6:41 AM

    Juicer here. I try to eat as healthy as I can but I don't like fruits and vegetables. It's ridiculous really. I was a vegetarian for 15 years. I have no idea how bad I was eating. I wish I could survive off mexican food, quite honestly. But I know that isn't healthy so I juice the fruits and vegetables that I don't care for [kale, sweet potatoes, mostly all fruit that's juiceable, beets]. I don't do it as meal replacement, though. I juice to go with my lunch.

    I used to love GP but over the years she has just become absolutely repulsive.

    ReplyDelete
  10. I think she is smiling cuz she is peeing in the water.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Meh. Who hasn't? I'm sure we'd all agree it provides a lovely feeling of relief. And being 'one with nature'.

      Delete
  11. The only thing Gwenny needs to do is tone up.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Really? Is this the look of a flabby body? Y'all are harsh!

      Delete
    2. This comment has been removed by the author.

      Delete
    3. I agree with Cleodacat

      Delete
    4. For all the working out she claims to do, I am not impressed with her body. Sure, she is slim...but she has no muscle tone at all. Her belly and skinny arms remind me of malnourished children. Not cute. She is skinny fat.
      Me thinks the Tracy Anderson method isnt working.....

      Delete
    5. That's definitely not a pilates-toned body

      Delete
  12. Goop's hair looks like shit because she doesn't eat.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I have no idea what she eats (press reports aside), but if I had to guess I'd say she chose ass over face. Girlfriend's hair could benefit from more good fats in her regime...

      Delete
  13. Cleodacat -Yes!! She looks like a fat skinny person, you know what I mean?

    penelope jane - your post made me laugh because you said you were a vegetarian who doesn't like fruits and veggies. What did you eat as a vegetarian?

    I find the juicing thing so interesting. I am curious to see if it is a food trend that will stick around. Everyone I know juices. It just kind of makes me laugh. People will smoke and drink and eat crap all night, but then claim how healthy they are because they juice. Um, ok.

    ReplyDelete
  14. No love for Goop, but her kids always look healthy and happy. I don't like the accusations of her mistreating her children just because this Enty hates her.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Also not a fangurl and am with you on this. I hate the hate, and the accusations it breeds. Kids seem FINE to me.

      Delete
  15. Anonymous6:51 AM

    @Susan: You'd be surprised. Lots of tofu, bean burritos, what I call the holy trinity [avocado, tomato and onion], bananas, apples. Pasta. My teens and twenties were awesome. Also: vodka and cranberry juice, beer and wine. Now at 37, I can see where I went wrong!

    ReplyDelete
  16. One of my friends does a New Year's cleanse, but I think it's a different kind. No dairy or carbs, 20% protein, lots of vegetables (but not all). Not for me, but hey, if it works for her.

    And no, Goop does not have to lose an ounce.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Her cleanse looked so disgusting I wouldn't touch it with a ten foot pole.

    ReplyDelete
  18. I never overindulge during the holidays so I don't need a "cleanse" in January. I overindulge all year so I need a "cleanse" every other month.

    She doesn't need to lose any weight and if she feels she does she should probably keep that to herself. Just sayin'.

    ReplyDelete
  19. I went into Whole Foods yesterday and was assaulted at the front door with cleanse items. $7.99 lemon water juice and $8.99 green juice. Twenty feet or less from the wine aisle. Oh, the irony.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. @Tinsel- I'd be willing to try her cleanse if I could mix it with something from the wine aisle..

      Delete
  20. The part where you wrote about goop throwing a brown wig on and start singing Spanish songs made me laugh out loud, Enty. Thats some funny shit. :)

    ReplyDelete
  21. This is an attention getter. I can't imagine a woman who proclaims she is 10-15 lbs overweight appearing in a skimpy bikini. She just wants to hear all the people tell her how great she looks.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ms. Cool: that was my first thought too.

      Delete
  22. I dont think inhave ever met anyone as self obsessed as her. Go ahead, lose weight. Whatever.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Keep loosing weight 'til you disappear for good.

    ReplyDelete
  24. @ auntliddy-you nailed it.

    ReplyDelete
  25. Bullshit Enty! No where in her blog post did she say she was trying to lose 10 - 15 lbs.

    ReplyDelete
  26. She had lost whatever curves she had a few years ago. An extra 10lbs would do her body good.

    ReplyDelete
  27. A cleanse is just that, it's not necessarily about weight loss but ridding toxins and, I guess making your bowels less backed up, or something. Personally, I'm not down, but to each their own.

    Anyway, I don't know where Enty's getting this "10-15 pounds of weight loss" detail from, since it's not mentioned in the cleanse article/menu on Goop: http://www.goop.com/journal/make/264/winter-detox-mag.

    I'm not saying she doesn't have body issues or anyone should follow this menu, but it seems like Goop is low-hanging fruit for snarky gossips to just make up whatever and it sounds believable. I'm skeptical, is all I'm saying.

    ReplyDelete
  28. I do the same cleanse that she does every year. It is really hard, but I feel great after a week or so (it's a 21 day cleanse). My kids don't like most of my clean diet foods, so I prepare normal, kid friendly food for them. I'm sure she does the same. Not many kids are willing to eat puréed lentil soup, kale smoothies etc.

    ReplyDelete
  29. I think she looks great, but I understand where she is coming from. You are your own worst enemy when it comes to your body - that is the way it is for many of us.

    ReplyDelete
  30. that marc anthony line tho..lmfao

    ReplyDelete
  31. I think she gets her high off of not eating and doing these cleanses.

    ReplyDelete
  32. she's an IDIOT her face already looks much older than her body…..

    ReplyDelete
  33. She needs to add 10-15 pounds of muscle. I agree she's "skinny fat" and arguably clinically malnourished based on the other photos in the Daily Mail.

    ReplyDelete
  34. The whole idea that your body needs to "cleanse" itself of "toxins" by "eating clean" is absolute horsecrap. You have a nice organ that takes care of it for you called a liver. You don't have extra "toxins" that need to be gotten rid of via juice. Anyone who knows diddly squat about medicine or biology will tell you so. Anyone who's not trying to sell you something, that is.

    ReplyDelete
  35. + 1 @Krab I wanted to say something like that too, but was feeling lazy. Thank you!

    ReplyDelete
  36. +100 Krab & Reno. I juice because it makes my skin good and I love the taste. (Especially when my favorite alkaholz are supplementing it) I do feel benefits (as you obviously would from a rush of nutrients) and add it to my meals. However, people talking about "removing toxins" are full of shit and simply need to crap. Let 'dem toxins loose bitches. And while we are at it, Contact me if you're interested in buying a pretty little sink-hole in Florida I have for sale...

    ReplyDelete
  37. The whole 'cleanse' industry is bullshit just like the supplement industry. Billions$$$ wasted on bad biology/science. Mostly caused by the dumb bitches in Hollywood.

    ReplyDelete
  38. Cleanse is just a nice, palatable word for a starvation diet. I guess when Gwyneth sees the slightest hint of having boobs, she thinks she needs to starve--ahem--cleanse.

    ReplyDelete
  39. Goop's little boobs are implants. She had them put in a while back.

    She's not as thin as professional stick figure Kate Bosworth so obviously Goop has to lose some weight. ;)

    ReplyDelete
  40. Just cut off her head and ten pounds gone!

    ReplyDelete
  41. You could just throw a brown wig on her and have her start singing songs in Spanish and call her Marc Anthony.

    =========================
    I stopped reading after that line. Too funny.
    Seriously though she should get help.

    ReplyDelete
  42. Good job, Krab! So-called cleanses may be a way to jump-start a diet after eating too much holiday food, but the whole toxin-removal jazz is just bunk. They're not as bad as homeopathy, but some are a bit extreme -- nobody needs to spend weeks consuming nothing but Texas Pete flavored lemonade!

    ReplyDelete
  43. I've been kinda poo-pooing around here lately, cracking wise at A-list Farrah Abraham and Drunks on a Plane, even though I do like this site.

    But seriously, it seems like every time Enty posts a non-blind item about whatever celebrity, someone comes along with some basic fact-checking, and whatever Enty posted turns out to be false.

    The inaccurate info doesn't bring in tons more visitors, as most commenters read in good faith and leave comments, not realizing it's wrong. If anything, it just makes me side-eye the blinds. If Enty can't get the reported stories right, how can the blinds be right?

    ReplyDelete
  44. Get a grip Boogy - this isn't National Geographic

    ReplyDelete

Advertisements

Popular Posts from the last 30 days