Monday, August 26, 2013

The Goopster Threatens To Call The Police If You Take A Photo

When authors have book signings, they are usually very humble, grateful little shindigs. People have plunked down a considerable amount of money, and in the case of a monster cookbook, even more money than normal. The author, grateful for the love will autograph the book for the person who has waited patiently in line and listened to a few words from the author. Because of the intimacy of a book singing, the author almost always will allow someone to take a photo with the book purchaser, and will always let the book purchaser take a photo of the author.

If you are Gwyneth Paltrow, you make your own rules and most of them don't involve anything nice when it comes to fans. It's hard to believe she has fans left in this world that care about her which is probably why she restricts her book signings to the Hamptons. Rich people are the only ones who would let her get away with this crap. At a book signing this weekend, the people who purchased a book were allowed to get it signed. They were also told the following. "No photos will be allowed with Ms. Paltrow. No photos will be allowed of Ms. Paltrow. Should you violate this policy, the police will be called."

Way to win over fans Goopster!


54 comments:

  1. Goop is a control freak, and she cannot control amateur photos. She cannot airbrush them to protect her image. Amateur photos might show wrinkles, flab, or a bad hair day!

    Hard to imagine that Madonna didn't think of this first.

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  2. Wow, if true. Wow.

    It's my understanding that in public, you are allowed to take photos of whoever and whatever you want.

    Would they just accuse them of trespassing then and say as a store they have the right to refuse service to anyone?

    Waste of police time and money.

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  3. Beyonce has taught her well

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  4. If one person snaps a bad picture of her, it'll be in the Dailymail ASAP. So I can sort of understand.

    Still think she's an unattractive and weird-looking cunt.

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  5. Has she always been like this?
    Ridiculous.

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  6. If that's the case, why don't paps get arrested? They take "unwanted photos" all the time. I think she may be a bit (or a lot) delusional...

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  7. Not being allowed to take photos seems to be a growing trend among celebs.

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  8. She has serious self image issues.

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  9. Or taking a cue from Amanda Bynes.
    Only use the photos she posts on Twitter.

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  10. She would definetely need to call the cops after I smacked her in the face with her signed book.

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  11. Good god, I don't think this bim could be any less likeable.

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  12. And what "law" exactly would you be breaking by taking a photo that the police would arrest you for? I wish someone would have dared to "disobey" and taken a photo. Just like those fools who have been arrested for calling 911 after getting the wrong order at McDonalds and the like, it would have been great to see the mugshot of whoever the moron is who thinks the authorities have nothing better to do than to protect an actress from a fan photo.

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    1. If the photo was taken inside the store I think the store has grounds. Most stores don't care but if they are dealing with a B like goop, they may actually enforce.

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  13. Shoot, I think I'll go to a Goopy book-signing and get myself arrested! I gots nothing better to do than antagonize this self-important twunt! I'll let y'all know how it goes, okay?

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  14. What a waste of police officers time!

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  15. 911: "911. What is your emergency?"

    Caller: "Help! We need you to send the police right away."

    911: "OK. What is your emergency?."

    Caller: "We have a person here who is inexplicably a fan of actress Gwyneth Paltrow. And they have a camera!"

    911: "OK. And they have assaulted Ms. Paltrow with this camera?"

    Caller: "Yes! They have taken a photo of her without permission."

    911: Silence

    Caller: "We are detaining this person until the authorities arrive!"

    911: **Click**

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  16. What a self entitled bitch she is. Why can't she lose all her fans and have to get a real job?

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  17. She'll stay relevant for a while because she's the hated Marie Antoinette spouse of a pretty visionary artist - a role she's carving out for herself in a world that's changing faster than she can adapt from her limited, shallow view of the world.... I say celebrate these little feaux pas because that's her clawing her way into oblivion... you go girl...

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  18. It is actually quite common for that sign to be posted. David Sedaris had that same message a few years back.
    I assume it is to keep the line moving.
    But then again, I must like assholes. :)

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    1. I went to a reading of his and remember that he wouldn't pose for photos, but I don't remember there being a threat of calling the police if someone took a picture on their own.

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  19. Just goes to show there are people out there with too much money and too little sense, give to charity folks!

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  20. Contrast that w/ Anthony Bourdain-he posed for photos w/ everyone who asked at the book signing I went to and even posed w/ all the cooks that showed up and didn't purchase his book.

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  21. If she doesn't like doing it stay the fuck home . She shouldn't need to do appearances to sell books her name and rep should sell books.

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  22. I try to eat primal and I read cookbooks like porn so I checked this one out from my library. Boring as hell. Not really as smarmy and stuck-up as you'd think, but boring. As hell.

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  24. Oh common Enty, you're like Jon Snow, you know nothing!

    I used to work with artists and organise these specific kind of events (signing session) and it's very common not to allow any photo (sometimes, the order comes directly from the management team).

    By the way, I'm a long time reader, 1st time poster and french (so... mistakes, sorry)

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  25. Meh. That shit happens all the time.

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  26. Having attended and even coordinated numerous book signings, I can tell you that the "no photos" thing is not new or unique to Paltrow. I don't recall that we ever invoked the cops, but whatever.

    It's a matter of efficiency. You've got the author for an hour or two, if everyone lined up is asking for photos, guess what, anyone who didn't get their book signed by the end of the author's time is SOL. Then the story gets spun that the author is an asshole who walked on half their fans or whatever. Same thing with signs that say "no personalizations".

    So unless Goop's people actually called the cops on anyone, there is no story here.

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  27. In her defense, she surely is not the first celeb at a book signing to have this policy. But she's still a No. 1 asshole.

    Anthony Bourdain is my fave. I hope he guest judges an epi of Top Chef. OMG. Did any of you see the ad with Padma strutting it in NOLA. That alone is getting me to watch.

    AKM - I secretly check out library books that I am mortified to own: I totally will admit that I took out that Deceptively Delicious crap by Jessica Seinfeld. I blame it on hormones, because I was preggers at the time. Fortunately, I realized that duping my kid into eating good food is fucking stupid. And fortunately, he loves to try good food - in between lollipops and cheesy goldfish, natch. But Jessica Seinfeld and Goopy seem to be cut from the same cloth: Pretentious, rich and annoying as fuck.

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  28. Since I'm in the biz this is how it goes depending on how the lines are....
    Short line - personal photo with fan o.k
    Long line - photo of author o.k. but theres no time
    for fan with author photo, but you can
    always have a friend snap a photo of
    the author signing the book for you and
    just lean in.
    Most authors are very gracious

    Goopie is a bitch

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  29. Anonymous9:54 AM

    Hehehe, I'd love it if she called the cops on me when I take that book of hers, pulverize it into a colonic and shove it up her pretentious ass.

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  30. All I see in that photo is a bowl of plain oatmeal in a book store. Not appetizing.

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  31. This story from Catherine Oxenberg makes me laugh. Goop's bodyguards are serious people!

    “Gwyneth’s bodyguards blocked my re-entry despite my assurance I was a just an author and pointing at my name tag, ‘No!’ they growled, body blocking me. So I was forced to crawl under the table. And there I sat with my meat products, wafting the excellent smells toward my sleek vegan neighbor. She ignored the siren smells of protein. We never did say hello, although I did try to sell my book to her sleek vegan children. No bites.”

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  33. These people are definitely terrifying and are probably why Gwyneth now wants fans to be arrested:

    Exhibit A

    I googled "Gwyneth Paltrow book signing" and there were hardly any pics of her with fans.

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  34. Really, wtf is wrong with this girl? Im starting to think she has some mental issues, and im not joking.

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  35. @SevenofEleven...Catherine Oxenburg already said she only made those comments for entertainment purposes, was trying to cause a stir and be funny. She said that's what authors do.

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  36. Heheheheh, I think it's CHRISTINA Oxenberg. Catherine was the real-life princess who played one on "Dynasty."

    (I got really confused for a minute! Hee.)

    Also, Gwyneth isn't vegan, so Christina's comments had to be a joke. I think she tries to "eat clean," which still isn't even vegetarian, but I'm pretty sure she talked about eating a steak or burger once in a while in her book.

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  37. I am a book junkie and author groupie. MISCH is right about the usual protocol. Also, if the line is long they will limit the # of books you can get signed to keep the line moving.

    Didn't get a picture w/ Sue Grafton, or Eric Carle 'case those lines were around the block. Got a picture w/ Sandra Boyton and Kevin Henkes, 'cause neighbors were @ the signings too w/ their kids and took the pics while our books were being signed, and I reciprocated for them. Now was lucky to meet Charlaine Harris on a weekday @ Seattle Mystery Bookstore. This was just after she sold the Southern Vampire Mystery rights to Alan Ball, and a year before True Blood came out. Nicest lady ever! Took the time to chat w/ everyone, especially the local aspiring authors and let me take multiple pictures, including one w/ my baby. Doubt I would get another opportunity like that now that True Blood has taken off.

    Part of it is the length of line and if the author has another engagement right after, but some "celebrity" authors are jus assholes. My experience is most author are gracious, thrilled you are buying their book(s), and are pleased to take a moment to answer your questions or listen to you compliment them.

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  38. So you're in line and happen to snap a photo of her 10 people back and the police are called; who has the lawful right to hold you until the police show up? I'm thinking I'd just leave. If her bodyguards touche me then we would have a problem.

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  39. This is an asshole move on her part, but she is totally able to do it according to the law (in many countries, probably in the US too).
    She can invoke the right not to have her image used or pictured, the same right that you can invoke if some random dude is photographing you in the beach to jack off later to the pic. It's illegal and you can sue him.

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  40. so sick of this dumb pendeja...

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  41. I honestly don't need a picture with her, or care to have a picture with her. Now a picture with Chris Hemsworth...I'm there.

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  42. There are so many great writers and cooks out there with books that I don't see any need to ever read anything Gwynnie writes. I bet someone is going to go out of their way to get a picture of her at a book signing now.

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  43. LOL @ the po-po will be called. What a funhole.

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  44. @Lawdy Miss Scar- I met Charlaine Harris at a signing about this time last year- she continues to be gracious and unassuming; she gave a brief chat, took Q&A from the crowd, posed for many pictures, but she did have a limit of 2 books for signing. To say the least, it was a thrill to meet her.

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  45. Just go find a long skinny stick and and put a dried out bleached blonde wig on it.Lean a cook book against it and take a picture. There you go a picture of Goopy Paltrow. No one will ever know the difference

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  46. Around 10+ years ago, I went to an Annie Leibovitz event and shelled out the money for her latest book at the time (Women, IIRC) and stood in line to get it signed. (It was a LONG-ASSED line, BTW; I assumed that you could only get the current book signed, but no, I saw people w/all her books, etc., and a lot of people w/their vinyl copies of Born in the USA to boot. Kind of reminded me of meeting Sterling Morrison of the Velvet Underground about a year before he died and seeing the crap people wanted him and Moe Tucker to sign, including large inflatable bananas...) I don't recall if there was a photo policy or not (which would have been highly ironic), so I can't tell you about that. What I can tell you about is that when it was my turn, as Annie was signing my book I mentioned that I did live concert photography. She stopped, grinned at me conspiratorially, and said, sotto voce, "Doesn't the lighting suck?" Yes...yes, it does. ;-) Bless her fuzzy little heart...

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  47. When I was 14, Ozzie Smith (the Hall of Fame shortstop from the St. Louis Cardinals) did a signing here. Back then in 1990 he was one of the top and most popular players in the game.

    My Dad had bought my ticket for his autograph and I had brought a brand new NL Baseball and an 8X10 of him to get signed. In front of me was a kid and his Dad wearing old, torn up clothes and an old raggedy baseball for him to sign. They didn't realize you had to buy a ticket for $10 for the autograph (part of it went to the guy who put on the show and all of Ozzie's money went to the Cardinals children's hospital charity), the guy took out his wallet and didn't have a dollar on him. You could tell he was embarrassed, apologized to the person taking the tickets and told his son they had to go. Ozzie saw them and overheard, stood up, took out his wallet and handed the ticket taker (who was the person putting on the show) the money for a ticket and a new baseball which he was selling at a pretty good markup. Ozzie said, "These folks stood in line to meet me, these are the people that allow me to take care of my family and I'll never turn anyone away who wants to take a minutes and allow me to thank them for putting me where I am".

    It was the most awesome thing I have ever seen a celebrity do. Like I said I was next in line and I swear I spent five minutes talking to him and getting pictures taken with him, a few of which was me wearing his World Series Championship ring. He was scheduled for 3 hours and actually stayed about 10 hours meeting and talking with each and every person, connecting with them in some way. A few minutes for him and a lifetime of memories for that person.

    THAT is what celebrities should be like. They need to realize that we are the people that put us where they are. The Goopster could learn a lot from class acts like Ozzie Smith and Mark McGwire (never mind the steroid thing, he has been known to stay at the stadiums for six hours after a game to sign autographs for people). Ozzie was always my favorite player, but that day he showed me he was someone I could respect and look up to.

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  48. @RowdyRodimus -- Wow! Teared up at your story re Ozzie Smith and the people in line ahead of you. THAT'S.CLASS.

    Thank you for sharing. That's a 'Kindness' in a posted format.

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  49. @Rowdy - YES. Are you a STL person, too? Ozzie is forever The Wizard! I so love him.

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  50. As mentioned by another poster, this does happen. Happened to me with David Sedaris as another reader mentioned. Sedaris, was curt with a few short words, but did sign books. I was a little disappointed, but honestly should haven't been suprised as it IS david sedaris and I have read his books, so he's no sweetheart. Chuck Klosterman was nice enough and it didn't hurt that the event occurred at his alma mater located in Grand Forks, ND. My best book signing experience was with Michael Moore. He gave a talk at my alma mater. after the talk, he signed books. there was a huge line. He showed a rough cut of his (then) newest film "bowling for columbine" while people waited in line. When I got him to him, he signed my book and graciously posed for a picture. Was so nice! When I think of a celebrity experience that is the gold standard. No matter what your politics, it's hard to argue with a person who takes the time to graciously greet each person and show a free film while your're waiting. I was totally impressed.

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