Tuesday, August 13, 2013

The Canyons Box Office Made It Over $30,000 - Barely

So much for anyone going to see The Canyons in a movie theatre. The final weekend box office figures are in and the movie starring Lindsay Lohan made $30,100. I would like to find the people who spent $15 of their hard earned money and ask them why they did it, but, it was probably family members of everyone who was in the film or worked on the film or drunk people who thought they were going to see some kind of IMAX Grand Canyon movie. This is considered to be the worst flop of Lindsay's career, but I disagree. I think something like Labor Pains which was supposed to be released but ended up going to DVD or a cable channel or something like that would be the worst. The problem that Lindsay faces is that she is an awful actress. It is all well and good that Ben Affleck visited her and gave her advice and told her how to stay sober and how to make a comeback, like he did, but there is one big difference. Ben has talent. He can act and direct. Robert Downey Jr. could act so people were willing to give him another chance. Lindsay is an awful actress and a pain to be around and to work with so why would anyone hire her.

45 comments:

  1. How much did it cost to make the movie??

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  2. Haven't watched any of her recent bombs, but in her younger years, ie freaky Friday and mean girls, that girl was a talent. Can years of drug abuse actually turn you into a crappy actress?

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    1. Years of not giving a crap about your work can make anyone's work suffer. Just like a salesman would have trouble selling something he knows nothing about, an actress has trouble giving life to text she hasn't studied. A few may be able to pull a passable job out of nothing, but most have to work at it.

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    2. I don't think she was ever any great talent. Just another pimped out Disney doll.

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  3. History has shown that Hollywood loves a great comeback, so if she were smart, she'd get sober, go get some serious training, star in a indie film and work her way back. But that is entirely up to her to decide and do no one else.

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  4. Where was it playing?! I totally would have seen it! Found it!! Los Angelenos: it's at Sundance Sunset Cinemas this week. I'm so going!!!

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    1. VIP I want your full review! Please include nude pics of dudes in said review if you can!

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    2. @VIP I'm tempted to fly in just to tag along with you. Drinks before & after, of course.

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    3. @suga you can find all of the nude scenes from the movie with a simple google search. They are unique sex scenes that would be hotter if LL was replaced by anyone else with big tits

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  5. She definitely has talent when she's sober.

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  6. I paid $15 to see it and I loved every minute of it! It was awesomely bad. It was part drama, sometimes porn, and a horror film all rolled into one. I tricked a friend into seeing it with me and she loved it too. Seriously, it is pretty entertaining. Very similar to The Room.

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  7. Wonder if it's playing in the NY metro area? I have a morbid curiosity about seeing this movie, can't explain it
    Lol

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  8. Outside of a very small number of gossip bloggers and a subset of their readers, pretty much everybody acknowledges that Lindsay Lohan has a hell of a lot of talent. She's made a complete mess of her life and her career, and she's blown a role or two, but you can count on very few fingers the number of credible observers who think she can't act.

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    1. How does she have talent? People keep saying this but haven't been able to give one good example of her killer acting abilities. Unless you call lying to the press (and Oprah pretty soon) about how sober she is "talent"

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  9. it only played 2 theaters....and VOD rentals were very very high

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  10. Come on, is Lohan any worse an actress than Vanessa Hudgens or Blake Lively or a dozen other pretty faces? They just had enough self-discipline to not let drug use (so far at least) ruin their lives.

    Well, they were also lucky not to be cursed with Lohan's parents, perhaps the worst stage parents in Hollywood history. And that's saying a lot.

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  11. I don't see Lindsay as talented, sober or not.
    In my opinion, she lucked into her most known performance (Mean Girls) - and the role was simply well suited for her quirks and personality, but not actually good acting.

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    1. @Cecilia00...
      I completely agree. She is NOT a good actress.
      She was cute as a little kid, but that's it.
      She has no acting abilities, except being a complete twat-waffle, hence the reason she killed it in Mean Girls. That was due to the writing.

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    2. Thank you! I actually thought her acting was terrible in MG...especially when she became "cool".

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  12. I agree that she is not a good actress. There is no talent being squandered here. How many theaters was it actually in, though?

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  13. Lohan's acting is fine -- she even does okay in this movie. It's just an incredibly boring and boringly directed story with a lead actor (James Deen) who actually cannot act. Her face is sort of hard to look at, which is a problem. The film did do very well in VOD, so that's something.

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  14. Anonymous8:33 AM

    I watched "Mean Girls" for the first time when it was on tv a few months ago. I was really surprised at how terrible her acting is considering how everyone always says "but she was so good in mean girls!" Um, she was acceptable, kind of over the top and SNL-ish. You could definitely see her "acting". I continue to be surprised anyone calls her a serviceable actress

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  15. Seconding @harryknuckles, Ben Affleck is a lot of things but good actor is not one of them.

    And I for sure would have seen the Canyons if it played by me!

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  16. Anyone can see the Canyons - it's available on iTunes. I keep meaning to watch it, but I have to do it after the kiddos go to bed. Love me some BEE, but I heard this was terrible from a few friends who watched it (VOD). Even knowing this, I will watch it because of Ellis.

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  17. she used to be quite talented. now, she's just a mess.

    and ben affleck can act? I don't think so. he just clenches his jaw.

    and he is way over rated as a director. he's handsome and white and male, so hollywood is going to think that he is a genius.

    downey is a great actor.

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  18. The description sounds like it will make a great cult movie and gain quite a following.

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  19. I just saw Gone Baby Gone and The Town. For why are these considered good movies/well directed? My first film short in Super8 had better acting in it, and frankly it SUCKED.

    The story, editing, acting, and scene setting in both movies were horrid. I cared nothing about any of the characters. Ben Affleck is LUCKY, not talented.

    Lindsay is a very talented famewhore and trainwreck. That is all. Doubt I will poison my beautiful mind with this dreck.

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  20. @VIP I second Sugar's request(s) :)

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  21. Ben Affleck is not a good actor (IMO). Every time he is on the screen, all the energy is sucked out of the scene.

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  22. It will be a "long trail" movie, VOD, DVD, iTunes ... it will take a while but it will make its money back and reach its audience

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  23. totes rented it on demand. after two bottles of pinot it was hysterical but i dont think that is what they were going for. to be fair he was far worse in it than she was.

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  24. @KLM, as another fan of Ellis, I thought I'd share this with you: http://www.buzzfeed.com/louispeitzman/this-is-how-all-the-bret-easton-ellis-novels-fit-together

    (sorry, I don't how to "link" it)

    It explains how all the main characters of every BEE book relates to each other. Pretty cool stuff!

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  25. Ben Affleck might be a better actor than an average cardboard cutout, but I'm not even sure about that.

    Hohan was never more than ok, mostly she just repeated the same character: schreechy, bratty and very annoying. Probably close to what she's like in real life.

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  26. No...I saw Liz and Dick, which is probably one Lifetime Movies I have ever seen. It was unwatchable.

    Also...the worst acting job by Lindsey. Her voice was like 3 pack a day smoker, husky...where the real Liz had a high, sweet voice.

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  27. "The problem Lindsay faces" isn't the issue at hand. The problem is Lindsay's face. It's not the face she became famous with. It's not a face anybody could get famous as an actor with. It doesn't move like a human face should. She needs to give it up & get a gig on the 700 Club or one of the shopping channels.

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  28. Let the countdown begin...3...2...1...

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  29. Gimme a break. Worst actress. Mean girls was good cause it had a great ensemble cast & tina fey wrote it. She was annoying in.prarie home companion and thats the truth. Just cause she played meryls daughter doesnt mean she is. She lucked out and has so far blown it. Having the disease of addiction doesnt give you depth, it gives u an excuse. I hope she gets healthy, but the girl is a snoozefest on screen. Although unintentionally hilarious in some things, I will give you that.

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  30. It was only released in one theater in its opening weekend and then in four the next. Couldn't it be seen on demand too?

    But, yeah, the reviews for it except one said it sucked.

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  31. Speaking of unintentionally hilarious, the scene at the cafe on Sunset where the camera angle looks like all the cars are about to drive right through their table. I thought the UPS driver would be listed in the credits he was so close.

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  32. Gonna go right ahead and disagree with you there, JAS. She can't act, and lots of people know that whether they say so or not. It was hard to watch her in A Prairie Home Companion compared to the real talent, and she still hadn't completely addled every brain cell at that time. She was cute and adequate in the kiddie movies she made, and that's all. Not even very good in Herbie, which would not have taken much.

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  33. I think she has talent and I wish her well. I seriously laughed out loud when I read that BEN AFFLECK was giving acting advice. Ben Affleck. The mannequin. Giving anyone acting advice.

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  34. I thought for its opening weekend it was playing in one theater in New York. If that's true, $30K for one screen is not that bad.

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  35. Agree, she's not a good actress but I do like watching her in movies.

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  36. I don't think the Linds Hoahan is particularly talented. Overacted as a child, played herself as a 20ish in Mean Girls. That isn't talent.

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