Crazy Days and Nights: Teresa Giudice Needs To Get Ready For Jail

Friday, August 16, 2013

Teresa Giudice Needs To Get Ready For Jail

Yesterday the US Attorney said they would accept no plea deal from Teresa Giudice which does not involve jail. If she wants all of this to go away, she needs to be prepared to spend some time in jail. Indications are that the minimum deal prosecutors would accept would be one year in jail and lots of probation and even some house arrest included. The other thing that is going to crush Teresa is that they want a big fine. As in a fine that will make all of her money go away. Combine that with time in jail and no income opportunities and a husband who would be sentenced to a much longer amount of time in jail and then deportation to Italy, it is amazing to me that Teresa is able to smile, let alone go out and party as in the photo above. I guess she knows she needs to make money now. She could go to trial, but, if she loses then she will only see her kids through bars for the next 20 years. Take the deal and get it over with. Let Melissa Gorga raise them for a bit and they can have their own reality show which Teresa can be bitter about while in jail.

37 comments:

greenmountaingal6:47 AM
She probably doesn't believe that she'll actually be sent to jail. I wonder what will happen to her tacky mansion.
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Pip6:53 AM
If a lawyer wrote this piece, then I am a rocket scientist.
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Meanie Rhysie6:55 AM
I think it was written from a friend's couch or someplace where this Enty is crashing. ;)
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Boozie6:56 AM
lawyer here - pretty sure no lawyer would write like this. even drunk. even trying to be cutesy. having said that - i'd watch a melissa gorga raises teresa's kids tv show in a heartbeat. think of the screaching teresa would so from behind bars. i'd hear it 1300 miles away!
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Kathy W. - One Brown Mom6:57 AM
She really should watch Orange is the New Black. Girlfriend needs to get herself ready!
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Susan6:57 AM
Melissa Gorga wouldn't raise those kids. Teresa's parents and Juicy's family would.

Argh. I'm actually a quasi Teresa fan. I don't know why. I guess these stupid Bravo tv shows make me want to root for the underdog. I tend to root for the chef that's being ganged up on by the Mean Girls on Top Chef, as well. Because, inevitably that shit seems to always happen.

No doubt the Giudices are McShady, but I feel like all the peeps on RHNJ are. I have a feeling that Juicy's fam is mobbed up in more ways than one.

I'm so meh on all of this. Not a fan of tax evaders - they can go scratch, but I naively want this story to be false.

On a positive note, I actually own Teresa's Skinny Italian cookbook (it was a gift!), and the recipes are really fab and it is in written in such a way that it sounds like she is really sitting there talking to you. (I read cookbooks like novels. I'm a dork like that.)
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Kathy W. - One Brown Mom6:58 AM
Boozie, I'd watch too. Somebody needs to get Andy Cohen on the phone!
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crila166:59 AM
Celebs usually only get a slap on the wrist, so that's what she's probably expecting.
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Boozie7:06 AM
@KL - i went to school with Albie and Greg Bennett, i'll fb them to tell Andy ;)
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Pip7:20 AM
@Susan, I would say Teresa is my favorite out of all of them. I can deal with Caroline now that she isn't as big of a bitch this season. Jacquelyn is batshit crazy, Melissa seems to be a famewhore and lifelong victim, and Kathy is just boring.

There's no way in hell they would let the kids live with the Gorga. They would probably stay with Juicey's "fambly". One positive thing coming out of her going to jail, is that the others no longer can blame her for all of their problems. You can't spread gossip around or tweet from a jail cell.
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ladybaus7:28 AM
I watch the show occasionally and yeah Theresa is funny in a oblivious/whack-job sorta way. She loves her kids and her husband. It always makes me laugh to think she worked at Vogue for years before the show. I could not imagine her and Anna Wintour together...
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shortyp3337:40 AM
Susan...I, too, am a quasi-fan and hope that this is bs. Joe, on the other hand, is the epitome of slime and hope he does get the full jail treatment!
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SueRH8:03 AM
Ugh, Theresa isn't an underdog, she's horrible!
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Carol8:28 AM
I don't believe she believes she will go to jail. I think she thinks she is above that. Oh she's going. She's going to the Edna Mahan Correctional Facility for Women in NJ. She can sit and blink her eyes a million times and lick the side of her mouth constantly there.
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Jessica9:18 AM
I feel sorry for anyone that ends up with her kids - they are demons.
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__-__=__9:51 AM
Maybe she saw 25th Hour, that movie they filmed in Austin with Edward Norton. Italy probably doesn't look too bad to her right now!
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Pookie9:51 AM
it's going to be denials all the way up until appeals day. i'm not here for that. the only thing that's going to be interesting to watch are the stan wars between Team Teresa and Team Melissa.
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AKM9:59 AM
What you said, Susan. And Pip.

Isn't there some loophole for the deportation since Teresa is a citizen? Surely I must be wrong or it wouldn't have even come up, but it seems silly to me, I guess. The guy's been here since infancy, went to U.S. schools, married a U.S. citizen, has children who are citizens...

And the cookbooks ARE great. I don't care if they're Teresa's mom's recipes, Teresa's recipes, Heather's recipes, whatever. T and Heather together have written some fun books with good recipes and pretty pictures.
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Naomi11:41 AM
This doesn't mean she is def going to jail, it's up to a jury right?
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Susan12:34 PM
This comment has been removed by the author.
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Susan12:35 PM
OMG. I just got back from a five-hour playdate. So, I'm just now checking in.

I find all of Nigella Lawson's cookbooks are fantastic to read cover-to-cover.

I'm curious to see how this plays out in the courts. Now this is just a hunch on my part, but I am convinced whoever writes this blog right now has no backstory on any story posted. So the condescending tone urging Teresa to get ready for jail is just a whole bunch of what the fuck to me.

And historically speaking, I believe that I could speculate about a case as much as I want but you never know what really happened or how the reality will play out in court until a ruling is made. So.... I'm just gonna sit back and watch.
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Naomi12:43 PM
In a way she should get ready for jail. BUT saying that, I was positive Casey Anthony was going to rot in hell and she had a lawyer who got her off. I have a feeling that NBC who owns bravo is going to be supplying a really fantastic lawyer to make their cash cow is not sent away.
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Rose12:45 PM
@AKM, I'm not sure but I think any felony convictions would probably negate him being allowed to stay by marriage or kids.

This woman is so delusional. I don't doubt she'll think she is scott free until the slammer door closes on her.

I do like MG and I think Teresa's brother is her oldest's godfather. It wouldn't surprise me if they helped with the kids but they are pretty obnoxious kids. You can see how much having shitty parents has impacted them.
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AKM1:17 PM
Oh, I guess that would make sense. I guess I was thinking that in a general sense, he's as much a citizen to ME as I'm a citizen, and I was born here. Then again, I'm law-abiding. ;-)

And we'll have to agree to disagree about MG versus Tre. I don't like MG -- total two-faced snake-in-the-grass golddigger! -- and I think T's kids are kinda fun, if "spirited."

(Joe Gorga is Gia's godfather; you are correct. And I believe that Tre is Antonia's, maybe? Melissa always says, "She's my kid's/kids' godmother!")

The Gorga boys, frankly, were pretty obnoxious the other night...with the billboard? Calling their dad "Stupid"? Have T's kids done anything that's really worse? Just sayin'. :-)
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Naomi1:21 PM
Regarding Gorga boys calling their dad stupid. The kids are all in on it, do controversial things to get more airtime honey, all make believe.
Maybe they are auditioning for a movie. I don't watch the show anymore but love reading the comments. Now the kids are involved Andy Cohen should be especially ashamed of himself. The big problem is when you are laughing all the way to the bank, you feel no shame and can justify it.
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Naomi1:24 PM
@Pip, fascinating that Theresa is your favourite. Is she the one you most identify with, like to laugh at, and feel more superior when watching her? If you genuinely like her, please let her qualities that make her a good person. Rule out setting an example for her daughters. So why is she your fave? Enquiring minds want to know!
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AKM2:05 PM
Teresa -- no "H," thanks -- is my favorite, too, but I'm not going to list why if it's just going to be used to make fun of me. :-/
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Naomi2:28 PM
No, I won't. She is portrayed in such a way that it does fascinate me why people like her so much and what are they seeing That I don't see. BTW, I think the whole lot of them are fame whores so I'm not singling her out.
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Tax Attorney2:41 PM
Another lawyer here and in MHO (1) I agree with those who say it's unlikely that an attorney wrote this; (2) I predict a hung jury or an acquittal for Teresa (no H), with her husband doing some relatively serious time; (3) I think Melissa's maternal shortcomings (recent failure to use a carseat for her own child, alleged whip-it party host with her own small children in attendance) combined with Joe's allegedly steroid-induced violent rages make their custody of the Giudice girls highly unlikely; and (4) Teresa Giudice's cookbooks are definitely worth the money.
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Susan2:43 PM
Well, I like Teresa because I think at the end of the day she knows crazy shit on all of the housewives and their husbands, but she really does keep her mouth shut about all of it. All of the Stripper-gate nonsense and now Melissa cheating on Joe is being brought up by producers, not Teresa. Without Teresa, there is no Jersey housewives. The entire storyline of the past two seasons has revolved around her.

And anyone who acts like that much of a fool at their child's Christening, is a no. 1 asshole in my book. So, I will always judge Joe Gorga based on that epi. That's one of the most sacred days in your kid's life, and he starts a rumble.
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Susan2:46 PM
OMG. Last week when Teresa's girls were shooting those play guns in the house at the chandelier and all of their gaudacious knick-knacks, I was dying. I was like, "Oh see. My mom would beat the shit out of me and my sisters for those shenanigans."
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Susan2:47 PM
Did anyone else throw up in their mouth a little bit when Jacqueline's blubber with tattoo was laying on the operating table? The fuck?!?!

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Anonymous9:45 PM
please put her in jail! what a wreck
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