Antonio Banderas is starting to look a little older each time I see him.
Not sure what look Brody Jenner's girlfriend is trying to pull off here.
Blake Lively in China without Ryan Reynolds. She must have drugged him.
Daryl Hannah and Brooke Shields. It's like the 80's again.
Camryn Manheim was at the same premiere with
the amazing Wanda Sykes.
Cameron Diaz, Kate Upton and Leslie Mann all on set of their new movie.
Cher shows off her prison shoes.
The moment when Christopher Reeve shows up in Man of Steel.
Carly Rae Jepsen managed to get another magazine cover. She is hanging on and hoping for that next big hit.
Did you know that Carly Rae Jepsen is 27 years old??
ReplyDeleteThat is a little too old for the "teenybopper" thing she is trying to do.
Yes, and cher is over one hundred, but ugly and oversurgered. At least CRJ is cute and allegedly not a bad person.
ReplyDeleteBanderas is almost (august) 53, if he had not the hat or such a short hair, he wouldn't be so aged. His lack of body mass doesn't help, either.
I love Kate Upton.
I too love Kate Upton. I think she is pretty much the sexiest woman around right now.
DeleteDaryl and brooke have that whole tranny thing going on.
ReplyDeleteI like CRJ--her duet with Owl City was fun. Here's hoping she finds another hit.
ReplyDeleteWho did Cher borrow that outfit from, Beetlejuice?
Q.What did the blonde say when he opened the box of Cheerios?
ReplyDeleteA.Doughnut seeds!
Q.Why did the blonde tip toe past the medicine cabinet ?
A.So she wouldn't wake up the Sleeping Pills
Q.How did the blonde hurt herself raking the lawn?
A.She fell out of the tree!
>>blonde say when he<<
Deleteblonde = girl
blond = boy
Couldn't help myself. *sigh*
Leslie Mann that's my boo, she played my Mum in Bling Ring. She's wicked funny!
ReplyDelete# 4
ReplyDeleteA man was visiting his wife in hospital where she has been in a coma for
several years. On this visit he decides to rub her left breast instead of just
talking to her.On doing this she lets out a sigh.
The man runs out and tells the doctor who says this is a good sign and
suggests he should try rubbing her right breast to see if there is any reaction.
The man goes in and rubs her right breast and this brings a moan from his
wife.
He rushes out and tells the doctor. The doctor says this is amazing and is a
real break through. The doctor then suggests the man should go in and try
oral sex, saying he will wait outside as it is a personal act and he
doesn't want the man to be embarrassed.
The man goes in then comes out about five minutes later, white as a sheet
and tells the doctor his wife is
dead. The doctor asks what happen to which the man replies: "She choked."
# 3
A guy walks into a bar with a pet alligator by his side. He puts the alligator
up on the bar. He turns to the astonished patrons. "I'll make you a deal. I'll
open this alligator's mouth and place my genitals inside. Then the gator will
close his mouth for one minute. He'll then open his mouth and I'll remove
my unit unscathed. In return for witnessing this spectacle, each of you will
buy me a drink."
The crowd murmured their approval. The man stood up on the bar, dropped
his trousers, and placed his privates in the alligator's open mouth. The gator
closed his mouth as the crowd gasped. After a minute, the man grabbed a
beer bottle and rapped the alligator hard on the top of its head. The gator
opened his mouth and the man removed his genitals unscathed as promised.
The crowd cheered and the first of his free drinks was delivered.
The man stood up again and made another offer. "I'll pay anyone $100
who's willing to give it a try". A hush fell over the crowd. After a while, a
hand went up in the back of the bar. A woman timidly spoke up.
"I'll try, but you have to promise not to hit me on the head with the beer
bottle".
# 2
A small white guy goes into an elevator, when he gets in he notices a huge
black dude standing next to him. The big black dude looks down upon the
small white guy and says: "7 foot tall, 350 pounds, 20 inch dick, 3 pound
left ball, 3 pound right ball, Turner Brown" The small white guy faints !!
The big black dude picks up the small white guy and brings him to, slapping
his face and shaking him
and asks the small white guy. "What's wrong?".
The small white guy says; "Excuse me but what did you say?".
The big black dude looks down and says "7 foot tall, 350 pounds, 20 inch
dick, 3 pound left ball, 3 pound right ball, my name is Turner Brown."
The small white guy says, "Thank god, I thought you said 'Turn around.'"
# 1
This one made it No.1 in just 1 day !!!!
Q) What did Bill Gates' wife say to him on their wedding night ?
A) "Now I know why you named your company Microsoft!"
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteCAVENDER'S LADIES BOOTS
ReplyDeleteTURN A PORTION OF YOUR STRUCTURED SETTLEMENT PAYMENTS INTO CASH NOW!
ReplyDeleteCLICK HERE!
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EVERYONE'S A CRITIC.
ReplyDeleteC
D
A
N
R
E
C
I
P
E
S
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
We the people of the United States, in order to form a more perfect union, establish justice, insure domestic tranquility, provide for the common defense, promote the general welfare, and secure the blessings of liberty to ourselves and our posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America.
ReplyDeleteDid you sing it while you were writing it?
DeleteI'LL SEND A MESSAGE TO THE WEBSITE OWNER THAT I COPIED AND PASTED THAT JOKE FROM, GAY.
ReplyDeleteI DEFINITELY WOULDN'T WANT TO CAST A DARK CLOUD ON THE INTELLECTUAL DISCOURSE AND/OR POLLUTE THE INTELLIGENT DISCOURSE THAT WE ALL HOLD SACRED HERE AT CDAN.
CDAN
FOREVAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WOLVERINES!!!!!!!!!!!!
I
ReplyDeleteSCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMED
IT.
Enty is paying me BIG TIME BUCKS to drive up the site clicks!
ReplyDeleteEnty is paying me BIG TIME BUCKS to drive up the site clicks!
ReplyDeleteEnty is paying me BIG TIME BUCKS to drive up the site clicks!
ReplyDeleteEnty is paying me BIG TIME BUCKS to drive up the site clicks!
ReplyDeleteEnty is paying me BIG TIME BUCKS to drive up the site clicks!
ReplyDeleteEnty is paying me BIG TIME BUCKS to drive up the site clicks!
ReplyDeleteEnty is paying me BIG TIME BUCKS to drive up the site clicks!
ReplyDeleteEnty is paying me BIG TIME BUCKS to drive up the site clicks!
ReplyDeleteEnty is paying me BIG TIME BUCKS to drive up the site clicks!
Enty is paying me BIG TIME BUCKS to drive up the site clicks!
Say what you will about Blake, but she is beautiful.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeletePeople don't generally age between the times you see them. It's when they don't that's worrisome.
ReplyDeleteKPeony, she is lovely as long as she doesn't speak. I can't with that mush mouth, poor thing.
Jokes are funny, giant spaces are not.
Erm, I mean people generally DO age
DeleteI'd give my left nut to look like Blake Lively.
ReplyDeleteI think canopener is KANYE with the ALL CAPS RANTS!!!!!
Case closed.
Sorry about the all caps and giant spaces. My granny can't hear very well and she's a slow reader.
ReplyDeleteWhy do you need to laugh? Who has told the bad joke? Is it a friend? Your crush? Your boss? You may need to laugh more/less depending on the person and their status. If the person always tells bad jokes, sometimes it's better to just nudge them and say something like "dude that joke was awful!" and then laugh. Be sure not to offend them though.
ReplyDeleteSmile. It's easier to laugh if you are smiling because you feel happier. Start laughing and show the other person that you liked their joke. You don't have to drag out the laugh, just chuckle for a few seconds depending on how funny the joke was supposed to be.
ReplyDeleteIf the joke was really bad, think of something funny. If there is something or someone that always makes you smile, think of that. It's better to laugh at something completely different than come across as fake.
ReplyDeleteMake the laugh seem as real as possible.
ReplyDeleteThe person might know you are faking and feel very annoyed. Watch out.
ReplyDeleteWhy did the dinosaur cross the road?
ReplyDeleteBecause Chickens Hadn't Been Invented Yet!
Who's Green and Sings?
Elvis Parsley!
What did the fish say when he hit the wall?
Dam!
Did you hear about the guy who went to a zoo that had no animals except for a dog?
It was a Shiatzu!
Who's the guy with no arms and no legs floating in boiling water?
Stu!
Where does Santa keep his Army?
His Sleevie!
What's Black and White and Hides in a Cave?
A Zebra Who Owes Money!
Who's the guy with no arms and no legs hanging on the wall?
Art!
What made the broken pencil story so boring?
It Didn't Have a Point!
What do Flies wear on their feet?
Shoos!
Why does a chicken coop have only two doors?
If it had 4 Doors, it'd be a Sedan!
What do outlaws eat with their milk?
Crookies!
A hamburger walks into a bar, and the bartender says....
We Don't Serve Food Here!
A man walked into a house
Ouch!
ReplyDeleteI'd let Antonio eat my cheese.
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeleteQ: What type of fruit is unable to have a spontaneous wedding?
A: A Cantaloupe!
(meLOLn?)
What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work?
ReplyDeleteA stick.
Q: What is the difference between princess Diana and Tiger Woods?
ReplyDeleteA: Tiger has a better driver!
Q: What is good on pizza but bad on pussy?
ReplyDeleteA: Crust
Q: What is the opposite of Christopher Reeves?
ReplyDeleteA: Christopher Walken
@Gayeld, awesome avi!!!
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteIs that Camryn's son Milo with her? Damn, he's growing up fast, and a very nice-looking kid...and mom's looking pretty good, too. :-) (You've possibly heard the expression "Black don't crack" in regards to Black women frequently aging better? As someone around Camryn's age and weight class, I'm here to say that fat don't crack, either, or at least not nearly as fast. ;-) (Supposedly Catherine Deneuve once said that after 40, a woman has to choose between her face and her ass, and there's a couple of different ways to interpret that. One is that you only have enough time and energy to take care of one, seeing as they both need more maintenance past a certain age; the other is that if you stay skinny, your face may age faster, and if you gain weight, you might be fatter, but your face will hold up a little better. Either one works for me... ;-)
ReplyDeleteI've ruined this thread. You're welcome.
ReplyDeleteAll the fat smooths out the wrinkles. Keeps the works well greased. whatever the case, I like Camryn, she always plays genuine characters, not always likable, but real.
ReplyDeleteI watched the trailer for Hot Flash, (i think it's called)I want to see it. However,I prefer to call them power surges. ;-)
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteYour comments weigh heavily on the CDAN community.
ReplyDeleteIt is always a shock when the kids are so grown up! Seconding (thirding?:)) the comments about Camryn and Milo.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeletefroggygurl and canopener, can you please take it somewhere else? Email, chat, skype, IM? You two need to work out your issues with each other somewhere else FFS. Go on Jerry Springer or Dr. Whoever and accuse each other of being asses on TV, at least you'll get paid for that instead of annoying everyone here. (PS: Please take Kermit with you.)
ReplyDeleteFor the love of all that is good and holy, make the molten chocolate cake videos end!
ReplyDeleteCher wore that outfit on WWHL on Thursday.
ReplyDeleteShe wore those shoes because Andy Cohen always talks to the female guests about their expensive shoes.
She was very sweet--he was in a frenzy because he is a big fan of hers and she was very patient and good humored with him.
Anderson Cooper came on the online after show with them and he was really funny--he said when he was a kid his mother-Gloria Vanderbilt-always wanted a daughter and she called Cher her fantasy daughter so he grew up thinking he was related to her.
Diaz, Upton, Mann doing.....ah crap, I have a gif in mind to link to, but I'm just not feeling hearing crap for linking porn.
ReplyDeleteLively
Brody's girlfriend
deletion account said...
ReplyDeleteDear administrators; Please remove all comments by froggygurl. When I attempt to log in to remove the rest it says this blogger user cannot access the comments. I am leaving this site after this comment. Thank you very much
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDelete