Nothing brings two exes back together again like one of them being perpetually horny and the other needing a shoulder to cry on. Although John Mayer had his way with many other women while dating Katy Perry, there are some reports that the reason the couple split was her getting back in touch with Russell Brand and by getting in touch I mean he managed to schedule her in between his 1pm and 5 pm sex sessions with yoga students he randomly picked up after he told them he could help them adjust their Chakras. Yes, he does it with his Hammbone. Anyway, now Katy is sad that she and John split up and has been spending some time hanging out with Russell (not much) and Skyping with him (a lot) and playing a few games while they do it.
No!!!! I don't want to picture Brand when I see Hammbone!!!
ReplyDeleteThis is what a high school love triangle is like. Katy get it together gurl!
ReplyDeleteI just don't find Russell Brand attractive. Katy's music is annoying for the most part, but she is very pretty. Her taste in men is dubious, at least in my opinion.
ReplyDeleteShe sure can pick 'em!
ReplyDeleteWe just knew these crazy kids would get back together. She needs to get sober, since that seemed to be their biggest issue. Remember the blind about her throwing things when she gets drunk and yelling about him? You'd only do that if you still had something for them and a part of you still cared. they seemed to really have a deep connection, and no that's no a metaphor for anything! Who knows maybe they can figure it out? Just glad she got away from Mayer. that guys the biggest douchetool ever.
ReplyDeleteEnty, please stop calling other men's junk "Hammbone" unless that man is Jon Hamm. It's not like they're all borrowing his penis to stick in their pants for pap photos.
ReplyDelete@Karen-How long do you think until they start selling anatomically correct prosthetics & pleasure aids?
DeleteI second Karen. And besides, we all saw the picture. Brand does not have anything near the Hammbone
DeleteAnd I echo the calling all men's units Hammbone as well. Only belongs to Jon Hamm. Besides after seeing that picture where Russell dropped trou it looks like he has an innie. It must grow a helluva lot!
DeleteBreak out the wheelchair?
ReplyDeleteSue me, but I like Russell.
I would too!
DeleteHappy birthday Kloie!!!
I like him too Kloie! And happy birthday to ya, fellow RB lovah!
DeleteHappy happy b-day Kloie!
DeleteI second what @Karen said, it's just creeeeeeeeeeeepy.
ReplyDeleteAnd as well, I agree with @Kloie, II like Russell. He is pretty intelligent, funny, and seems sweet. Having said that, I wouldn't sleep with him, but I can see why girls with low self esteem would.
I like Russell! Katy, not so much.
ReplyDeleteRussell is no Jon Hamm.
ReplyDeleteHis sex addiction aside, I thought they mainly split due to her young age and the fact that she's not sober while he's a recovering addict.
ReplyDeleteRussell can get it,anytime. His sense of humor is a mayjah turn on to me....John Mayer & his David Duke dick need to get back w/ Perez Hilton.
ReplyDeleteRussell is single so if he's not dropping everyone when KP calls him what's the big deal?
ReplyDeleteI actually liked these two together. I hope these crazy kids can work it out.
Sorry, someone posted a pic in the randoms yesterday and there is no way in Hades Mr Russell's grow-er will be mistaken for the Hammaconda show-er.
ReplyDeleteOh, the depths to which I have sunk... Time for the mimosa.
@Izzie- that pic gave me the sads big time.
DeleteRussell Brand is hot. He's very handsome and has that slightly dangerous vibe, he's smart and he's funny. OK, you'd need a whole-body condom and a long, deep-cleansing soak in Lysol afterwards, but he is HOT. Katy, not so much. She's kinda pretty in a small town girl way, she's kinda sweet, she's kinda beige.
ReplyDeleteIf they're getting it on, good for them. I actually think Brand is the well adjusted one in this twosome, and that is all kinds of scary right there.
I love them together. I always imagine their sex was mind blowing together. Hope they make it.
ReplyDeleteI'm still a little amazed that Katy is a natural blonde. That's a lotta hair dye going on there.
ReplyDeleteI think they're really cute together! Katy's a natural blond? Wow! I never would've guessed that!
ReplyDeleteI like Russell for his honesty about who he is. He's a recovering addict and a current sex addict. I would never sleep with him, but his honesty is refreshing. And he's funny. John Mayer is a douche, he plays the "I mean well, but I'm so misunderstood. Yes, I've messed up but my intentions where always true" barf. However, in true a-hole fashion, I regrettably find him hot as hell - I need a shower now. And bleach for that thought. And a drink next January to drown that thought as I'm having a girl and a guy like John is Mr and My worst nightmare.
ReplyDeleteCount me in on Team Russell. He's brilliant and witty. I just can't with Katy Perry. I hope she gets back with John Mayer and Russell finds love with an intelligent and spiritual goddess who supports his sobriety.
ReplyDeleteRussell's too good for her! I find Katy really.... unappealing and dim. She needs a better bra too.
ReplyDeleteBrand, Mayer, BBT are all the same species. No good will ever come from them. They may sound smart but there will never be any follow through. They are not personality diversity. There is a trail of misery behind them all.
ReplyDeleteI love Russell - he's smart, witty, spiritual and sex on a stick...and I prefer tacos ;) I can see why he's drawn to her, because I do think there's something there below the surface - but, she needs to stop the partying.
ReplyDeleteThey're both single, so have at it! And, I'm on the Russell is hot train...
ReplyDelete"...one of them being perpetually horny and the other needing a shoulder to cry on"
ReplyDeleteJenna Elfman was on Craig Ferguson recently & she was giving the lessons she has learned after a decade or more of being married. She said that women just want to be listened to and men just want to have sex. Keep those two things going & everybody stays more or less content. She said she wasted way too much time trying to analyze why her husband wanted sex so much. There is no reason. He's a man. Period.
Wise lady.
@lazy a COS member is wise?
DeleteI think she is bad for him. I have friends who havemet him and they say after 5 minutes you are ready to hop in bed with him. Thye say he oozes dirty sex and he makes you feel like the most special, most fasinating, most beautiful woman ever....
ReplyDeleteI totally believe that!!! He's charming as hell....I'd hit it...w/ 3 body condoms on, but still! Lol
DeleteI'm always ashamed to write/think/say this, but I'd hit it, too. Something very appealing about the dirrrty bad boys...what can I say? Plus, he sounded quite intelligent in that one VOGUE article.
ReplyDeleteIt goes without saying that I would harbor no delusions about meaning anything to him. I'd just take an hour or five if I could. That's all.
Lol @ MalibuBarbi!!!
ReplyDeleteRussel Brand reminds me of an ex. Gorgeous and hilarious with a crippling Peter Pan syndrome. It's endearing but exhausting!
I've wanting to hit that since the days of his BBC podcasts.
ReplyDelete@Karen
ReplyDeleteI think a mobile Hammbone would be appreciated by many in the public eye.
I can see it now "get your Porta-bone for pics here"
I'm a fan of Russell too, and yeah I'd go there. They're both single, what's the big deal?
ReplyDeleteEverybody knows at eX sex is the best.
ReplyDeleteI would totally let Russel adjust my Chakra with his Brandbone. He is one sexy dirty man.
ReplyDeleteWell...this won't last.
ReplyDeleteYep. I'm on the Russell is hot train.
ReplyDeleteHe's got that dirty hippy hot vibe. And he's smart. So, yeah, hot. Katy is a little shallow.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the birthday wishes! I wouldn't hit Russell Brand, but I'd like to hang out with him for a day.
ReplyDeleteThey are probably both sex (hypersexual disorder)and love addicts...an intimacy disorder as many addicts in or out of recovery tend to be. Usually many alcoholics, drug addicts, compulsive eaters or spenders act out in those addiction then find sex and/or love addiction at the core
ReplyDeleteAll I can think is germs!!!!
ReplyDelete