Rope Swing Fails

Blind Items Revealed

August 26, 2011

#4 - This B list comedienne who has been in television and movies recently went off on a rant about Scientology in front of a group of people, not realizing that two belonged to the organization. When they started to challenge her on something, the comedienne had a light go off and asked if they were involved with it. They said yes and she told them to run for their lives and then walked away.

Sarah Silverman

No More Andy Samberg On SNL

Andy Samberg has told the New York Times that he won't be coming back to Saturday Night Live next season. He has been on since 2005 and I think he is a great writer and his digital shorts are amazing. I'm not sure if he can make it as a lead actor in movies. I could see him doing some television. I definitely see him as a writer and supporting actor. He was one of those guys that are the glue to SNL and what makes the show kind of work. The guy who can be in every sketch and not seem out of place but never really stands out. He just finished filming a part in Grown Ups and he has the bomb of a movie coming out with Adam Sandler, but he really needs to find some movies that are built just for him.

Honey Boo Boo And Stage Moms

If you wanted to be famous back in the day you became an actor or singer or athlete. That progressed into reality stars which progressed into having sex with a celebrity and selling it for sale. The thing is that all of those situations, you had control over. It was your choice to become one of those things. If you wanted to make the most boring sex tape the planet has ever seen, it was your choice. If you wanted to be on Real World, it was your choice. If you wanted to be on Teen Mom it was pretty much your own choice. Now, if you were a child actor, was it really your choice? Maybe that is why so many child actors have messed up lives. That and they have horrible parents who belong in prison and not collecting management fees. Yeah, I'm looking at you Michael Lohan. Oh, and you too Gary Coleman's parents. I was going to say one other parent, but that one might actually try and hunt me down and kill me. That guy is crazy. I'm surprised his daughter is alive. Anyway, where was i? Oh yeah, Honey Boo Boo. How did she become famous?

Her mom makes her drink Red Bull and Mountain Dew which will make any toddler seem faster than Usain Bolt. So, mom gets daughter hopped up so daughter will get noticed so daughter will win and daughter will get famous which means mom will get famous because she has always wanted to be famous but never left this tiny town and her daughter is the ticket. She will be famous and mom is going to take 25%. So how does the mom who forces her child into this and hops her up? She gets rewarded by TLC and gets her very own show.

So, if you are a mom on Toddlers & Tiaras and see that TLC is throwing shows to toddlers, that is so much easier than trying to have sextuplets. All you have to do is be more outrageous and have your kid do crazier things and dress crazier and then they will have a show and mom will be famous. It is not about the kids. It is about the parents wanting to be famous. What mom would give a 6 year old Red Bull and Mountain Dew? The same kind who is going to be taking home a huge check from TLC every week. What about the kid? Mom doesn't care.

No Booze For Matthew Fox For A Year

It's been a busy week for Matthew Fox. First, Dominic Monaghan called him a woman beater and stuck to his guns. Matthew has never responded to that statement. he had a friend respond, but Matthew has not said anything. Then, the female bus driver who said Matthew Fox repeatedly beat her while he was drunk dismissed her suit. Finally, Matthew pleaded no contest to his DUI charge so he won't face jail time but can't drive or have any booze for a year. Of course that is in Oregon so he will probably move to Mexico for a year and continue to drink heavily. Where is the rehab in all this? Hit a woman while drunk and then get a DUI suggests maybe he has a drinking problem. It might not be Christmas tree Kiefer Sutherland bad, but it seems as if he has one.

Dina Lohan And Reality Shows

I know this is the weekend and that you are trying to relax and don't need much stress or drama in your life, but we need to talk. We really need to fix this once and for all. Dina Lohan on our television screens can't be allowed. So, you have to promise that after the first episode of whatever show she is on you will never watch it again. It is ok to watch the first episode because that way you can say you honestly saw it. Do you want Dina Lohan to have more fame? More camera time? Do you want to see her on the cover of tabloids when you are buying groceries for your family? Do you want to see her when you wake up in the morning and turn on your morning news show? I don't think so. Oh, and for those of you outside the US, this includes you. They show Kardashian shows all over the world. Do you want Dina Lohan to spread to your country too?

Dina is working on a show where she mentors Broadway hopefuls. Claiming to being a Rockette for five minutes gives you the qualifications to judge Broadway hopefuls because......????? Is there a big demand for a show like this? What does the winner get? A lifetime contract with Dina Lohan? Free tanner? Something from the Stolen Collection by Lindsay Lohan.

There is also the VH-1 ex-wives thing. I'm hoping she will get booted out of there for people who are way more interesting. She is not even the ex of someone that famous.

The final thing? Dina is trying to get on Millionaire Matchmaker. I know, I know, all men at the mixer should run as fast as they can, but Patti Stanger is going to lock the doors so the men can't get out. Sure, some of them will try to jump through the windows, but it's tough to get by the steel bars. before any of them leave, Dina gets to choose one victim. he will suffer the worst fate known to mankind. Yes, even worse than tonguing Verne Troyer. He will go on a date with Dina Lohan and it will be televised and recorded and avail;able for all to see until the day he dies. He will probably move and become a monk somewhere.

So, please make sure if you see any of these shows, do not watch them. Tell your friends to not watch them. Shame people at the water cooler at your office or on the street if you hear someone talking about them. Threaten to take your child out of school if any teachers watch them. These people are educating the kids of the world. You don't want them infected and then spreading the bug. The next thing you know they will be telling you that Bret Michaels only ever had sex with one woman a season on Rock Of Love.

Being Eddie Murphy's Girlfriend

I always feel sorry for the women who date Eddie Murphy. You have some serious issues to deal with and lets just say you probably are not going to be the only one playing house with him. Everyday I wonder if Mel B will run out of money and decide the only way to make a buck is to write an Eddie Murphy tell all. Nicole Murphy can't because of an agreement, but maybe she will let something slip on that new show of hers. Tracey Edmonds can't either. Look at the hug. Is that the most awkward hug ever? That's like a "I'll miss you while you are gone for six months, and promise I won't cheat on you hug you give at the airport," not a waiting for our latte hug. The new girlfriend is Rocsi Diaz from BET. You would think someone over there would have given her a heads up so she must be ok with what happens behind closed doors. And the gate. Eddie has a gate. He also has a guard. He also lives across the street from Gene Simmons if that kind of thing interests you.

Who Had 2 Weeks In The Jenelle Evans Engagement Pool?

And just like that, things turned out exactly how we knew they would. Jenelle Evans says she is no longer engaged. That lasted just about two weeks. She says that her future husband cheated on her and stole a Tiffany necklace from her. Well, I have no doubts they will get back together ion about two more weeks, but after the first time it's no fun anymore. At least she is predictable though. The whole Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez constantly getting back together and breaking up again is getting tiresome because they do it so frequently. I wonder if the keep breaking up so he can have a "break," and then they get back together when they are in town together.

Charlie Sheen Is Partying Again

You know what this summer needs? It needs three months of Charlie Sheen parties; meltdowns; missing cars; and toilet papering of the Maloof's house. Apparently Charlie Sheen is back to partying and drinking and there are hints and suggestions that Brooke suffered a relapse at Charlie's house during one of his parties. He is trying to set the world record for number of porn stars he can have sex with in one weekend and his neighbors have threatened to start calling the police if the parties don't start getting a little quieter.

Random Photos Part Three

Diane Kruger and Joshua Jackson on the kiss cam at the French Open.
Cassie Scerbo would like some attention please.
Gisele Bundchen. Tough to see if she is pregnant or not.
Kristen Bell in Beverly Hills.
Kristen Stewart is in a rush.
I actually like Kim Zolciak's real hair better than the wigs.
Cory Monteith and Lea Michele in Vancouver.
Everyone says Mila Kunis has gained weight. I don't really see it. Here she is with Clive Owen.

Random Photos Part Two

Michelle Yeoh showed up at an event in Beijing, but no sign of Zhang ZiYi.
One Direction has got so big that Niall Horen has hired a man to carry him everywhere.
Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen love dead crocodiles.
Rafaello Follieri posed for photos on his return to Italy.
Rocco has a summer job on
his mom's new tour.
It's going to take a lot more than a rose to make up for what Salma Hayek's husband did.
Apparently James Wilkie's school year lasts forever.

Random Photos Part One

Three parts today.

The Prometheus premiere was last night in London and Tom Hardy's girlfriend seems worried.
Logan Marshall Green
Minnie Driver
Charlize Theron
Noomi Rapace
Guy Pearce
Michael Fassbender
Not at the premiere, but making her new movie is Zoe Saldana.

Ted C Blind Item

Oh, the luxurious lifestyles of those rich and famous franchise stars!

They basically run Hollywood these days, what with their movies making gajillions of dollars at the box office and all that. But it's when they step out of that limelight that their perfect little facades fade away and their naughty little secrets come to light.

Like, say, Sammy Sniffles and a late night secret that's yet to be exposed...

Until now.

Sammy recently appeared in a mucho-hyped big screen flick, Three Cheers for the Underdog. One of those million dollar popcorn flicks that comes with action figures, legions of devoted fans and instant A-list credit.

And Sam does not disappoint when it comes to living the franchise lifestyle.

For one, S2 is into that whole fakey romance thing (complete with lovey-dovey paparazzi pics, natch), and, while that's one secret Sam would not want revealed, there's a nastier Vice that's starting to draw even more attention:

Cocaine! And loads of it!

Yep, like so many stars of yesteryear (or even yesterday), as soon as Sammy made it big in Tinseltown, the drugs started flowing. Now, Sam—discreetly, of course—will spend the whole night snorting lines of blow.

So when does the party end? Well, it doesn't, really.

Sammy does enough coke to stay awake through the wee hours of the morning, then heads directly from the party to whatever sort of work Sniffles has that day.

So far though, Sam hasn't slipped. But we're assuming it's only a matter of time.

AND IT AIN'T: Kristen Stewart, Josh Hutcherson, Chris Hemsworth

Ashton Kutcher & Demi Moore's Marriage

As you know, I love a good conspiracy theory and this one is great. Because Demi Moore announced she was leaving Ashton back in November and ending their marriage, everyone assumed divorce proceedings would commence right after. So far? Nada. That has everyone wondering whether the couple was even legally married in the first place. Maybe they just got married by Bruce Willis because he thought since he played a priest one time he thought he could marry them. Maybe it was some non binding thing they did while watching television or something, but it does make you think that after all of this, maybe the two were just living together. Doesn't excuse the non stop cheating on Ashton's part and Demi definitely thought of herself as Mrs. Kutcher. Still fun though to discuss on a Friday.

Four For Friday - She Fooled Them All

It's Friday which means it's time to remind everyone that I will be here all weekend posting. On Saturday I will do a reveal again for you and it is just a little over a month until reveals day. If you have not already sent in your reader photo, you can do so by e-mailing me at entlawyer90210@yahoo.com. I will start posting them Monday and continue until reveal day. If you have not already done so, please follow me on Twitter. The little bird is over there-------->

This A list singer has had numerous men pursue her in the past. She is married now, but while she was dating, she would tell all her boyfriends she was a virgin. When she became famous several guys wanted to be her first. There are three men who think they are her first and they each paid dearly to think they were the first, but none of them actually were. Our singer lost her virginity back in high school to a guy who died the next year in an auto accident. With no one to ever challenge her, our singer sought to make sure she was always a force in the business. The first man owned a record label and our singer desperately wanted to be on that label. He thinks he was the first and lavished our singer with gifts including cash and cars and signed her to his label. The day the deal was signed they spent two whole hours in a hotel before she said she had to go. The second was a producer who our singer wanted to produce her record. He was married at the time but wanted this singer badly. She told him she would only go out with him if he got divorced. He left his wife and produced the record and in return got to spend a weekend with the singer before she dumped him. Then, there is her husband who was told when they started dating that she was a virgin and intended to remain so until she got married. She didn't make it that far, but did manage to string him along for almost two years before they finally ended up in bed together. In those two years she set herself up for life in gifts and cash even without her huge record sales.

Your Turn

Favorite song or band when you were in high school.

Justin Bieber Gets A Concussion

In a scene probably reminiscent of Bret Michaels getting knocked to the ground at the Tony Awards or a bird slamming into a sliding glass door, Justin Bieber was knocked to the floor when he ran straight into a glass door during a concert in Paris last night. He fell to the ground but still finished the show. Later, after the show he apparently passed out for about 15 seconds and doctors say he suffered a mild concussion. As much as I give the guy crap, you have to admit most performers would have called it a night after being dropped to the ground last night. I wish there was some video of it somewhere.

2 Year Old Boy Hears His Mom For The First Time

Thanks to a brand new state of the art hearing aid, a 2 year old deaf child hears his mother's voice for the very first time.

Adam Levine Is Dating Ex-Girlfriend's Best Friend

There is no better way to put a capper on a broken relationship than to start sleeping with your ex's best friend. Adam Levine, who is not really known for his grace or his charm is doing exactly that. Just a month or so after he and Anne V split, Adam has moved on to Anne's former best friend Behati Prinsloo. That is quite the name. The pair have been spotted in Hawaii making out and then going back to their hotel room and then making out some more followed by a trip to their hotel room. So, just like any date for Adam Levine.

Family Gets $3M After Dad Had A Threesome And Died

It's not often you hear about a man who dies during a threesome and somehow his family ends up with $3M because of it. OK, lets face it. None of us have ever heard of that before. But it has finally happened so you can check the box in the book you keep next to the bed called S**t I thought I Would Never See. Apparently the man who died in the threesome had gone into his doctor the week before and complained of chest pains and arm pain. A jury found that the doctor should have warned the dead guy to not perform any physical activity until a heart stress test was conducted which was scheduled for the day after he died. The jury did find that the dead man was 40% responsible so that is why his estate only got $3M in the suit against the doctor.

Oh, did I mention the woman in the threesome was not the dead guy's wife. How awkward is to have to phone 911 and explain that whole situation. "So, umm, yeah. Ummm. This guy died and ummm. He was one side and I was on the other and ummm. Yeah, there was this woman and ummm. Well, he died while, you know. Ummmm."

It had to be a great 911 call. (thanks lutefisk)

Lil Wayne Tried To Get In Spurs/Thunder Game Without A Ticket

Apparently if you are Lil Wayne you are used to a few things in life. Recording tons of songs; monthly child support checks and getting into NBA games for free without a ticket and sitting in the front row. Last night, Lil Wayne was denied entrance into the NBA Western Conference Finals game between the Spurs and the Thunder because he did not have a ticket. Apparently his people had called the Thunder about getting Lil some free tickets to the game. Not just any free tickets, but front row tickets. The Thunder said no, but Lil showed up anyway and when he was denied took to his Twitter and made it sound like the team barred him from coming in for some other reason. You know, it is not like the guy does not have a lot of money. Peel off a few bucks and he could have got in. Peel off a few more bucks and he could have sat in the front row and some family could have had a nice little bonus and watched the game at home. Just because you are a celebrity does not mean you don't have to pay.

Real Housewives Salaries

Want to know who makes more money than any other Real Housewife? NeNe. She makes $750K per season which is ridiculous. For that kind of money she should be having sex with Peter and not just flirting. Do you think they have hooked up? I kind of feel like they have. It is not like Cynthia is going to leave him. He can pretty much do anything he wants and Cynthia will stick by him. I think he will eventually run through all Cynthia's money or go to jail. I am 50/50 as to which will come first.

Vicki Gunvalson makes the second most. According to Radar, she makes $450,000 per season. It is not like we are talking full 26 episode seasons of a primetime show either. This is for a very limited amount of time. I don't particularly like watching her, but I guess if she was not on then I could not see everyone else in her life who all do fascinate me.

For the most part, the OC women make the most because their show has been on the longest. For the rest of the salaries they discovered you can click here.

Reese Witherspoon's Dad Bigamy Case Is Getting Interesting

When we first heard about Reese Witherspoon's dad getting married despite still being married to Reese's mother, the reports all portrayed him as a victim. I think he still is and does apparently suffer some dementia. That would explain why he thought he could get married and why he was convinced to take out $400K in loans with his new "wife." There is another side to the story though. The media in Nashville has been filing motion after motion to get court documents unsealed and to allow television cameras in the courtroom for future hearings. One of the documents they obtained was a declaration from Reese's mom and it said the couple split because of his alcoholism, infidelity, overspending and hoarding." You know, all the people I have ever seen on Hoarders are generally not very wealthy. Can you imagine if you had a ton of money to spend and are a hoarder. You could get even more stuff in your house and maybe it would be higher quality. Plus, you hopefully would not find any dead cats. Reese sure has been nice to her dad over the years despite all the things he has done.

Pink Is In The Hospital

For someone who has stomach flu, Pink seems to be one happy person. Maybe it's the morphine. Pink says she was admitted to the hospital for stomach flu but that she is going to be fine. Whenever I get the flu I don't recall ever getting any pain killers. All I ever get is the same thing from my doctor. Drink a lot of water and don't drink much booze. I don't recall any doctor offering to fill me up with pain killers so I could ride out the flu on a wave of vicodin or morphine. Everyone would skip flu shots if the doctors passed out pain killers. Why be at work because you did the right thing and got a shot while all your co-workers are at home spending a week watching television and popping pills like they are at a Lindsay Lohan BBQ.

Pink did also have one of the top lines ever by a celebrity on Twitter. "Stomach flu sucks but morphine doesn't."

The Kardashians Figured Out Another Spinoff Show

With Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom taking a break from their show so Lamar can focus on basketball or quitting before it was canceled because no one watched it, the Kardashians needed another spinoff. There has always been the main franchise show called Emasculating An Olympic Champion which features a family figuring out new ways to make one of the most famous Olympic athletes of all time feel like less of a man and less significant than everyone else in his life.

After that there were version of so and so take a city. When the city got tired of them they moved on. Now, they have decided to have the Kim & Kanye move in together show. Kim and Kanye both listed their homes for sale. Huh. Did you know they did it in front of cameras? Can you see the show now? Yeah, follow the couple as they decide to live together. Just because you list a house for sale, does not mean you actually need to sell it. I can't believe people think they are actually a couple. They are not. They both want more attention and fame and this is what they have decided on. It is like Lisa Marie Presley and Michael Jackson getting married. No difference except Lisa actually has talent and Kanye has not molested any children.

Brooke Mueller Is Back In Rehab

You can say one thing for Brooke Mueller. Well, actually two things. She does keep trying to stay sober and she spends a great deal of money on rehab each year. Just a few months after exiting rehab after a very very long stay, Brooke is back in rehab again because she went over to the home of the king of drugs, porn and hookers also known as her ex-husband, Charlie Sheen and he thought Brooke seemed wasted out of her mind. Apparently Brooke decided she did not need her 24 hour minder any longer. Brooke also needed to go back to rehab before anyone from Aspen could check her for drugs or she could have gone to jail.

Random Photos Part Three

I just love this photo of Ricki Lake and LL Cool J so it gets the top spot.
Ashley Greene obviously is working out a lot.
I laughed off my arm injury too, but it was when I decided that I could leap the futon. #watchingolympichurdlingwhiledrunkisnotagoodidea
Andy Samberg and his tight shorts.
"So, what I think Natalie is I take a little off the top. Did I tell you about the time I took Drew Barrymore on a date?"
Christian Bale then takes Natalie to get her hair washed before cutting it.
Later Natalie decides to wash her car's hair? Yeah, that joke didn't really work.
Drew Barrymore getting her final wedding dress fitting with
Cameron Diaz.
Glad to see Elton John is on the mend.