Friday, December 28, 2012

The Goopster Has A New Cookbook

It is hard to believe that in April the third cookbook authored by Gwyneth Paltrow is coming out. I would wager that she has not eaten three cookbooks of food her entire life. This one is supposed to be all of her favorite recipes for when she needs to lose weight and also to feel good. Considering she always looks cranky and skinny, the book will probably just be a cover. Seriously, when has she ever needed to lose weight. Last I checked she has never had to play someone who has starved themselves to death or a hiker in the desert who could not find food. That is about the only stage of skinny beneath her now. I'm sure it will be a best seller and if people are willing to buy it, then that is their decision. Just remember. Cranky and skinny.

Posted by ent lawyer at 8:00 AM

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98 comments:

  1. seaward8:02 AM

    I wonder how much money she spends to have her hair look like unkempt shit.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Christopher Cruz8:07 AM

      Such a good one!!! And probably WAAAY too much!!!

      Delete
    2. Jazzy10:44 AM

      Yes! Also, who is telling her that she doesn't need to wear makeup?! If she is going out and taking pictures looking like this then she doesn't have any real friends.

      Delete
  2. Karen8:03 AM

    Cranky and skinny is fine, but does it also turn you into an absolute blowhard? That would be my concern.

    ReplyDelete
  3. LottaColada8:04 AM

    Chicken goop for the soul. Never trust a skinny chef!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Señior Seamhead9:22 AM

      I hate that line. You've obviously never worked in a restaurant.

      Delete
    2. LottaColada9:30 AM

      No señior I obviously haven't ;)
      And I'm talking about celebrity chefs not restaurant chefs.

      Delete
  4. O'Really8:05 AM

    I don't get all the Gwyneth hate. Maybe some reveals next week will enlighten me.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anna V. Xol8:18 AM

      Well for me it is how she tries to present herself as an everyday woman then gives "practical" advice to women and tries to sell them a $900 plain white t shirt. She was born with a silver spoon in her....mouth and does not seem grateful for her privelaged life. I love blythe danner but she raised a very spoiled woman. And now she is gooping all over us. Can i use it as a verb?

      Delete
    2. Unknown9:32 AM

      You need to spend some time reading how she'd rather die than give her kids a processed cheese product, all her nasty comments about America/Americans,, etc, and perhaps you'll get what a total snotty, anorexic, lying biotch she really is. Don't buy into the media/HW butt kissing, I know people that work on sound stages, have worked w her. There's many reasons she's called The Worst. But, Alba and Swift may end up usurping her, before too long.

      Delete
  5. discoflux8:06 AM

    She looks like the homeless lady that always used to ask me for cigarettes at the corner of 6th and Congress in Austin.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Anna V. Xol8:07 AM

    Dude, i can't wait! Just the other day i was thinking of how i should cook those rare golden goose eggs.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Meanie Rhysie8:07 AM

    I was never so miserable as when I was active with eating disorders. I looked damn good, but I was freakin' miserable! But my hair looked good.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Karen8:09 AM

    Also, RECIPES don't have the power to "make you look good and feel great." They're just instructions.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Sunny8:10 AM

    *takes hoops off and puts vaseline on my face*

    Just kidding! But I do like her - different strokes

    ReplyDelete
  10. FlirtyChick748:11 AM

    She wants to be the next Martha Stewart. I'm no fan of hers but I can see the appeal. Lots of women I work with would kill to be her.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Sugar 8:11 AM

    I don't love her either but I think she looks cute here and I actually like her hair. I'll never buy her cookbooks though.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Karen8:11 AM

    @Reeses, cosign on that. :(

    ReplyDelete
  13. VIPblonde8:17 AM

    I bought Gwyneth's first cookbook, just for her roasted brussel sprouts recipe. Totally worth it. Haven't even looked at the other recipes yet.

    Also, everybody knows that when Gwyneth is feeling fat, she follows "Clean" by Alejandro Junger, which is basically a fast. So if this is her weight loss book, what are the recipes going to be? Different ways to flavor your water?

    ReplyDelete
  14. Cheryl8:17 AM

    It's All Goop

    ReplyDelete
  15. Tish8:17 AM

    I went through the same thing, @reeses and @Karen :( The worst part was constantly being complimented on how 'great' I looked. Other people were clueless.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Meanie Rhysie8:19 AM

    Happily noshing on a slice of frosted Triple Choco Brownies that boyfriend made to make up for peanut-laden cookie bars he brought home from brother's house. Y'all have your mimosas and such...I'll take choco! =)

    ReplyDelete
  17. Pip8:19 AM

    I don't hate her, but I don't like her. She's meh. I doubt she came up with any of those recipes.

    ReplyDelete
  18. discoflux8:20 AM

    Here's the drink recipe thread:

    http://www.crazydaysandnights.net/2012/08/blind-item-2_10.html

    I totes bookmarked that sucker that day. Iposted it in the Stormin' Norman post, too.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Agent**It8:29 AM

      Sunny's Blue Fancies.. that's what I was looking for:)

      Delete
    2. dia papaya8:35 AM

      Thanks disco!!!

      Hope those babies aren't giving you too much trouble today!

      Delete
  19. Meanie Rhysie8:21 AM

    @Tish. Gahd, that was awful, wasn't it??? You look sooo good! And, when I stopped, people would say, "You need to get back to doing whatever it was you were doing!" Even after they knew I'd had ED!!!

    ReplyDelete
  20. Meanie Rhysie8:26 AM

    @Alma. I've been saying gooping for years... as in, I'm gooping the hair color on right now, can't talk! lol

    ReplyDelete
  21. Karen8:30 AM

    @Reeses and @Tish, exactly. Only a few people knew/know that my weight loss was due to an eating disorder. What I hate now is that trying to lose weight safely is so hard.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Eeekalicious8:32 AM

    Apparently Gwyneth's father was a self-professed gourmet "World Famous Pancakes" etc., so she grew up around the patter of cookery.

    I think these are probably mostly family recipes, which is fine, and early in her armchair chef career was accused in a Daily Mail article of having used the ghostwriter, Julia Turshen.

    According to Gwyneth, she (Gwyneth) "wrote every word".

    But, Julia Turshen (taken from an acknowledgment in one of the cookbooks):

    "She quantified, tested  and retested every recipe, oversaw the production of the photos, helped brainstorm in a crisis, and, above all, was my intellectual and emotional support through the whole process".

    So I think Gwyneth wrote the little first paragraphs that come before some recipes in recipe books...

    It pisses me off that she has so much yet is taking even more in putting out a celebrity cookbook, which will take business away from other cookbooks that are actually written by people who are trying to make a living at it.

    Apparently it is very hard to get a cookbook published these days bc of all the internet recipes available.

    I know she has the right to do anything she wants, but she seems to keep trying to be Everywoman and it is annoying.

    If she weren't a celebrity already she wouldn't have a chance of getting a cookbook published.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yndy9:38 AM

      Ummm it says "And Julia Turshen" right under The Goopster's name. Just in smaller print there.

      Delete
  23. discoflux8:33 AM

    Happy to assist, Agent. It can be the official drink of our drunken badminton team.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Agent**It8:35 AM

      Yes !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

      Delete
    2. dia papaya8:40 AM

      Sunny's Blue Fancies and drunken badminton! When and where?

      Who has the best party yard? All that sunshine in Portland yesterday has me thinking it's summer! Summer beach party!

      *did I mention I didn't sleep so well again*

      Delete
  24. Kelly8:33 AM

    I like her too!

    ReplyDelete
  25. eris hilton8:34 AM

    Never trust a skinny cook, that's what I say! Although in this case, I doubt she has ever cooked/eaten any of this food, but it probably was conceived of and eaten by someone else who knows what they're talking about. So hey, it might be pretty good.

    ReplyDelete
  26. Lioness708:36 AM

    She looks about 25. Impossible for someone her age and who's that thin.

    I'm two years older than her. I don't have any wrinkles. I'm also a good 70-80 pounds heavier than her.

    Amazing what 'shopping and retouching does.

    Skinny, cranky, and wrinkles - no thanks. I'll keep the extra weight. ;)

    ReplyDelete
  27. katsm07118:37 AM

    She almost looks like she asked her makeup artist tiger her the roseacea special. As if redness indicates healthy from healthy eating lol. And her hair? This photo is such a lie bc it's nothing like she ever looks in real life so why would get fans buy the cookbook if it's not the normal Gwyneth that they like in the first place? Even if she decided it was best to be makeup free on the cover to match the mood of the book, she needed to cover up her red nose which indicates inflammation caused by what se eats.... But at least we know she's still street bc she says things like "it's all good"

    ReplyDelete
  28. Tyler8:43 AM

    I love her as Pepper Potts in the Iron Man franchise movies. Just about any other celeb you can think of engages in more truly hate worthy off screen behavior than her imo, so whatever.

    ReplyDelete
  29. dia papaya8:45 AM

    I am torn about Gwyneth. I want to like her. She always seems so personable on the chat shows. Her golden locks and legs to heaven are on everyone woman's wish list. But! But!!! I just can't shake the feeling that she's not 100% genuine. That she's smirking at me with her giant blue eyes.

    But her and dreamy RDJ are good friends so maybe he knows something we don't know.

    ReplyDelete
  30. whocaresnow128:48 AM

    I hate to admit it, but her first cookbook is pretty good.

    Also, for whoever said food doesn't make you feel good, yes it does. Eat only crap and you feel, and look, like crap. Eat whole, clean foods and your body will look and feel good. There less chance of illness and most genetic diseases.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Brea McCain9:52 AM

      I was going to say the same thing but you said it better thanks.

      Delete
  31. yodelay8:48 AM

    Sorry, that cover shot looks like she's trying to sell me a hair lightening product in 1976. No thanks.

    I do like her as an actress however.

    ReplyDelete
  32. KathyVermont8:49 AM

    I don't mind Gwyneth at all, and am looking forward to her cookbook. I love to cook and I got back to what I weighed in my 20s by eating healthy and portion control, I'm not cranky & skinny either.

    ReplyDelete
  33. discoflux8:51 AM

    I'm at work today, dia, and the oldest is totally over the sickies. Yay! Unfortunately they go to their honorary grandparents house today so I have a little bit of the sads.

    When Mr. Disco and the boys (i'm totally making them start a band now) dropped me off at work this morning, I got misty eyed. I'm getting misty eyes right now just thinking about it. We were supposed to have them until the 5th because their mother, who left for england on the 21st and doesn't return until Jan 4th, being the oh so lovely person she is, decided that since the divorce decree states that Mr. Disco was only allotted the 22-28th (regardless of the fact that she didn't take that into account when she scheduled her trip and conveniently "forgot" and that the arrangements for us to keep them the entirety of the trip had been made months ago)that we had to take them to the honorary grandparents and said that if we didn't she'd have law enforcement come remove them.

    I don't understand how someone can be as mean as she is.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. auntliddy10:04 AM

      Me neither. Do these drama queens EVER think of the children first?? Ever? I have no use for people who do shit like this. Hugs to u and mr. And a pox on meanie-loo, i hope the heel on her shoe breaks and she has to limp all the way home.

      Delete
    2. Agent**It2:10 PM

      disco, she is not just mean but also very stupid. I do not know of any child that does not need all the good lovin' they can get. She has a great safety net for the kids with you and Mr.Disco, hopefully she'll wake up and get over herself real soon.

      Delete
  34. NapAssasin8:52 AM

    She's always been a macrobiotic follower, and typically that's akin to veganism as well as absconding from anything that might give you pleasure from food - alcohol, sugar, starch. I'm not surprised she put out another cookbook on a healthy lifestyle, she clearly has fans of how she lives, just look at Goop (the website). I'm sure equally vapid self absorbed rich white women will think "Finally, a book written by someone just like me, who understands my struggle and issues while finally taking advantage of the inexpensive bounty at Whole Foods. I'm saved!" And she'll make a mint off it and will continue to be exactly the same person. I don't hate her, but I spend a lot of time with raised eyebrows when I read about her. I hope she is somewhat as genuine a human as she believes she is, and a good mother. And I call bullshit on that picture. That was taken in her 20's when she actually had some roundness to her face.

    ReplyDelete
  35. Meanie Rhysie8:56 AM

    Oh, Disco, sweetie, your last comment made me sad and furious! I don't understand how people can be so damn mean and petty and vindictive. I give my Mom credit: she never ever bad-mouthed my Dad and trust me! She had reason to, but she always took the high road and I so respect her for that. Keep your head up and smile 'n nod! Smile 'n nod, baby!! Those kids will someday learn what a twunt their mother is!

    ReplyDelete
  36. MISCH8:57 AM

    Goopie follow's every diet fad that comes along....
    I won't buy the cookbook of a bulimic .....
    Anything for a buck...she really has become a greedy pig..
    On the hair she has thick wavy hair like her mom...

    ReplyDelete
  37. dia papaya9:00 AM

    Disco! I'm so sorry! Now I feel bad for asking. I don't like miserable people who use their children as pawns and make evetyone miserable in the process. It makes me steaming mad.

    You want for us to find her and rough her up a bit? I know people ;)

    ReplyDelete
  38. Karen9:02 AM

    @whocaresnow, I was referring to the wording, not the claim. The MEALS can possibly make you look good and feel great, but the RECIPES cannot.

    ReplyDelete
  39. Mama June9:03 AM

    I like Gwyneth, but I don't buy her cookbooks. Too many good online recipes!

    @whocares-ITA.

    ReplyDelete
  40. ms snarky9:04 AM

    it amazes me that with her income, she can't afford a decent haircut.

    ReplyDelete
  41. discoflux9:06 AM

    That's all I can do, Reeses. We do our best to provide a loving and stable environment for them while they're with us, never bad mouth her in front of them, and try to raise them to be be good, respectful human beings. Her behavior will only backfire on her as they get older and see the things she does and the way she behaves.

    ReplyDelete
  42. discoflux9:07 AM

    Ahhhh... don't you just love the arguments over semantics, karen?

    ReplyDelete
  43. Anonymous9:10 AM

    She's probably just trying to keep the creative juices flowing and have herown thing going on. At least she's not sitting around expecting Chris to take care of her and bitching him out because of "another tour" he has to go on. I hope not.....

    She's cool beans..:-)

    ReplyDelete
  44. Anonymous9:10 AM

    In 10-15 years she'll have a tell-all book about how difficult it was to be shilling her cookbooks and her healthly lifestyle when all the while she was anorexic/bulimic. And she'll make a ton off of that one too ...

    ReplyDelete
  45. Jules_3459:11 AM

    @kathyvermont, great job, I am trying to get back to what I weighed in my 20s myself (or even my 30s).

    ReplyDelete
  46. discoflux9:13 AM

    I'm actually glad you asked, dia. I needed to vent. :) My besties all have the whole week off so they're not online to chat.

    She's one of those people that isn't happen unless she's making someone else miserable, won't do anything for herself that she can get someone else to do, never takes responsibility for her actions, and is as dense as a marble block.

    ReplyDelete
  47. Meanie Rhysie9:14 AM

    @Frivolity! I can definitely see that happening!

    ReplyDelete
  48. Karen9:16 AM

    @disco, it's because I'm an editor. I'm naturally nitpicky about the written word. It hit me right after I posted, "...Karen...no one cares but you."

    ReplyDelete
  49. Li9:17 AM

    She may be a nice person but that stunt she pulled with Winona Ryder makes me think otherwise.

    ReplyDelete
  50. Tippie Hippie9:18 AM

    Oh I don't find her attractive and I've been pondering for years what all the hype is about her! And she thinks she cool enough to use the NWORD because she has black dumb azz friends... Bey Jay and YE! YEP I SAID IT

    ReplyDelete
  51. discoflux9:18 AM

    Karen - I completely appreciate it. I do technical editing as well.

    ReplyDelete
  52. Tippie Hippie9:19 AM

    MY GAWD she resembles OPIE....

    ReplyDelete
  53. Jules_3459:19 AM

    Li, what stunt?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Li11:05 AM

      The story goes that Winina wanted to audition for the lead role in Shakespeare in Love and she had the script and the Goopster swooped in, stole the script from her and the rest is history. At the time she and Winona were bffs. Not so after that.

      Delete
  54. Cheryl9:25 AM

    I did get back to what I weighed in my 20's. Due to gallstones, I had to go on an ultra low fat diet to prevent attacks until my surgery. In the process I learned how to fit healthy eating into my lifestyle. Post surgery, its been difficult to maintain balance in my diet, but eating right does make you feel better than when you eat garbage.

    ReplyDelete
  55. Sherry9:27 AM

    This is a horrible shot of Goop. And it isn't a recent picture.

    Years ago I collected cookbooks and had prolly over a 100. I realized that aside from a few go to's my skill set didn't require them any longer and gave them away.

    I make it a point NOT to buy them from celebrity chefs however because I know most of them are not penned by said chef. That somehow seems inherently wrong.

    @Disco..Sorry your having the kiddie tug of war. Karma baby!!!

    ReplyDelete
  56. White lilly9:30 AM

    @discoflux, I'm so sorry! It such a horrible thing when parents do that to their chiildren. They think they're getting back at the adults but it's really the kids that suffer... so vent away!!

    @Frivolity, I can see that happening too!!

    Maybe her cookbooks are good, but I just find it hard to swallow it (no pun intended) when I've watched that show "On the road - Spain", with her. Everyone else on the show was seemed to always be enjoying the food and whenever she would be eating, it looked like she was disgusted and only took a little piece and hated everything. She wouldn't appear all the time, so it even looked like the other people on the show were more relaxed when she wasn't around...

    ReplyDelete
  57. jax9:30 AM

    Skinny and cranky is NOT ok. It means you have low blood sugar and your body wants fucking food.

    I'll take a few extra pounds and poutine any day over starving to look a way my body was never meant to be.

    ReplyDelete
  58. White lilly9:35 AM

    Anyway, I'm off to hell. Or going get the ferry and being pissed that people cut in line with their cars. Will be back later. If I'm not and not back until New Year's Eve, I wish you all a great New Year, I know most don't really celebrate but here in Brasil, we have a bunch of parties and I'll be off to watch fireworks at the beach!
    So have fun, lots of mimosas!!!!

    xoxoxo

    ReplyDelete
  59. dia papaya9:37 AM

    So many editors! I know who to call when I write my book!!! Glad someone still knows how to write and use words correctly!

    Glad I could be of service Disco! You vent away! The ladies of CDaN are here!!!

    ReplyDelete
  60. Karen9:38 AM

    @dia, I would much prefer editing a book to a user manual. Just let me know. :)

    ReplyDelete
  61. dia papaya9:43 AM

    Thanks Karen! We can drink Guinness and take about words!!!

    ReplyDelete
  62. Yndy10:04 AM

    @disco I refer to parents like that woman as "incendental genetic donors" -- since she has all the parenting instincts of a pit viper, she must only have been in the universal picture to donate some important genetic traight to her offspring. Which means they can be perfectly nice boys as long as they don't emulate her!

    ReplyDelete
  63. Meanie Rhysie10:09 AM

    @Aunt Liddy...lolol! When I read 'a pox on meanie-loo', I thought you meant me! My nickname..honestly, people, my name on Facebook is Meanie! That is my true and bonafide nickname! =)

    ReplyDelete
  64. skimpymist10:24 AM

    I wonder if it comes with a bonus enema...

    ReplyDelete
  65. discoflux10:32 AM

    Thanks for the support, ladies. I truly do appreciate you all. I wish we could challenge her for primary custody but she's backed by millionaire parents who will do whatever she asks without question, regardless of the ramifications on the boys and we are just not financially capable of fighting them. Children are just props to that family, it seems.

    ReplyDelete
  66. urban chaos11:06 AM

    I want to like Goop, I really do! But I cannot take her 'foodie' persona seriously. Food culture is just another snobbery of hers.
    I will save my money for cookbooks of those I respect- the ones who have paid their dues in the kitchen and offer some mastery I can salivate over.

    ReplyDelete
  67. teg11:17 AM

    I don't mind the goopster, she's so oblivious she seems like a total nut, which I can appreciate (plus she looked freaking adorable in The Avengers, which I did not expect). That being said, she looks like she's 12 on that cover--at a certain point looking younger than your age is cool, but looking like a tween is not.

    ReplyDelete
  68. Anonymous11:46 AM

    She looks pretty gorgeous to me. I think she should have been a shoo in for Grace Kelly, she looks exactly like her and Kidman does not at all. I think the CDAN guy likes her, he's just joshing and all.

    ReplyDelete
  69. Jessie12:53 PM

    I love Gwyneth. And I think she just needs someone else to do her hair. Okay, I'll do it.

    ReplyDelete
  70. Mango1:04 PM

    She's a raging, pretentious ass and the fact that her Goop blog doesn't allow comments says a lot. Even Gwyneth in her little bubble must realize that people would mock the shit out of her.



    ReplyDelete
  71. Anonymous1:32 PM

    Pulling a GWYNETH.....

    OR

    I got PALTROW'D....

    WHen a "friend" or close acquaintance double crosses u. To put your hands on something that is not yours/stealing/snooping. To back stab. Disloyalty, etc....

    "Don't let Cindy come over your house Anna, she pulled a Paltrow the other day, now I can't find my (lifted item)."

    LOL, Yoko can't b the only celebrity whose name is synonymous with evil doing.....;-)

    ReplyDelete
  72. penelope2:20 PM

    I agree that this photo was taken years ago... I doubt she looks like that now!

    ReplyDelete
  73. warmislandsun4:59 PM

    I don't like her. No, I don't.

    ReplyDelete
  74. Pip7:53 PM

    I'm I'm the minority, but I really like the picture. She has the "natural" look going on (and probably is wearing tons of makeup to achieve it!). During the summer, we go to the lake a lot (I live I'm MI), and I end up looking like that by the time we leave. After a day of swimming and relaxing, I end of with rosey cheeks and messy hair. I don't look pristine by any means, but dammit, I feel pretty!

    Disco, I am sorry to hear about your hub's issue with his ex. My parents divorced when I was you. I love my mom to death, but she bad mouthed my dad left and right. By the time I reconnected with him, I already had in my mind the kind of person he was, due to the bitterness my mom had. I have no idea of your situation, or what type of person she is, but this needs to be nipped in the bud. She may be trying to hurt your husband, but really she is doing a major disservice to the little ones.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Pip7:56 PM

      You=young
      Also, I meant to put I'm only once in the sentence. I can't even blame my autocorrect today, dammit!

      Delete
  75. OneGirlRevolution8:02 PM

    You all already know about my irrational Goopster love....

    ReplyDelete
  76. Sunny8:09 PM

    Jesus, Lola! Where have you been? I couldn't fight this fight my myself, so I vented on FB! Ha ha!

    ReplyDelete
  77. Unknown9:44 PM

    If she is that young and suffers from osteopeanio due to her disorder there is no way i would ever buy any cookbook she puts out. I remember being a teen and someone asked her how she maintains her weight and she said her mom gave her the best advice. Never eat anything you like. Even at a young age, that sounded so wrong.

    ReplyDelete
  78. OneGirlRevolution9:51 PM

    Lol, Sunny. I saw you up there and thought, "poor Sunny, all alone all day." But then I saw renoblondee chimed in with the irrational love...and then there were 3. ;p

    ReplyDelete
  79. Roman Holiday9:49 AM

    I am a day late on this post but I like her too:) Maybe she is a natural at cooking? Also, she is probably one of those people that are naturally thin, I know from experience that this can happen I have been 113 lbs for at least 25 years now. I just can't hate on her because she is pretentious, we all have our moments only ours are not broadcast for everyone to see!!! @ Sunny and Lola, I am glad I am not alone:)

    ReplyDelete
  80. artemis10:35 AM

    My favourite GOOP quote from when people complained that the products she shills are not affordable for the everyday woman:

    "I am who I am. I can't pretend to be somebody who makes $25,000 a year. "

    Sigh...I wish she would put on her actress hat and try to see what it's like to struggle while doing whatever possible to eat and live a clean lifestyle. I do admire how unapologetic she is however.

    ReplyDelete

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