Deadspin got their hands on the note above written to one neighbor from another neighbor. The thing is I have come close to having this happen to me on several occasions. I have definitely passed out in places that are not the basement. I have definitely peed in places I have not supposed to. Hey closets can be confusing if you are drunk and it is dark. Better to just give up then to try and find your way back out. I do feel bad though about confusing an open dresser drawer for a toilet, but I blame that on a tequila shot drinking contest and the Santa Ana winds. The one thing that i don't have is a cape. That part sounds fun.
I've thrown up on people, but I haven't peed on anyone's stuff yet.
ReplyDeleteBut I have a friend who has, on multiple occasions. We refer to him as "The Urinator."
I hate to admit it, but I actually do have a cape for such occasions.
ReplyDeleteMy BIL, years ago, came thisclose to taking a drunken whizz on our recliner. It's been an awesome topic of conversation ever since :-).
ReplyDeleteWhat a chill neighbor.
ReplyDeleteDone this before. I actually got mad at the owners of the house for rearranging the furniture and redecorating. Thankfully they were college boys and let me hang out and smoke pot with them before I abruptly jumped up and dashed out the door, never to be seen again.
ReplyDeleteWhen I lived in student apartments this would happen regularly. A friend of mine waited in the living room of the apartment underneath ours for a good 20 min before one of the people who lived there came out asked what she was doing.
*I had stumbled into what I thought was my house. Forgot to add that whoops.
ReplyDeleteThis was good! The neighbor handled it extremely well.
ReplyDeleteI have gotten up and squatted in the corner thinking I was in the bathroom. Totally asleep! Hey, at least it wasn't the bed.
ReplyDeleteOne of my friends hates Pauly Shore with a firey passion because Pauly Shore puked on him at a party 10 years ago
ReplyDelete@FSP: Hilarious photo today LOL!
ReplyDeleteThis person is lucky to have such understanding neighbors. But I'm wondering why they don't lock their door?
Hilarious! This guy has very cool neighbors.
ReplyDeleteIt's awesome that the neighbors were so good about this. The note is hilarious!
ReplyDeleteMy friend told me a story once about the time he went on a trip with his girlfriend and two other guy friends. They all shared a hotel room, Other friend #1 had way too much to drink, and in the middle of the night, went the wrong direction and instead of the bathroom, ended up urinating all over sleeping Other friend #2's face and shoulders. Horrible, but absolutely hilarious later.
ty chopchop
ReplyDeleteI love this note so much. On Saturday I was at this bar, and there was a guy wearing a cape made out of a pair of jeans. Like...he cut the seams and wore them flat as a cape. He kept twirling and whipping me in the back of the head. Hah. Drunk people are fun sometimes.
ReplyDeletelol! I once went into my neigbor's kitchen thinking it was my house...woke them up with my grumbling about where the phuck is the mayo? Who rearranged the cupboards? My Mom was absolutely mortified as the story went through the neigborhood. I've always managed to make it to a toilet to pee, but I did once projectile-puked in a friend's just remodeled bathroom. Tequila never again.
ReplyDeleteThank goodness this hasn't happened to me. I'm more into smoking. I thought of Enty right away when I read this story yesterday. Pretty cool neighbors.
ReplyDeleteI drank too many vodka & cranberries, and pulled all over a beautiful white carpet.
ReplyDeletePUKED. Darn auto-correct!
DeleteThis is hysterical...but how did the neighbor get into the other neighbor's apartment without a key? I'm assuming the neighbors locked their door before going to sleep.
ReplyDeleteThat's pretty hilarious. I love reading these kind of notes. Those are probably some of the best neighbors ever! I would have lost my shit if a stranger peed on my stuff.
ReplyDeleteThere were a few years in my early 20s where alcohol led me down the path of eternal embarassment. I was a little bit clingy in those years, and I ended up throwing myself at a guy I liked at a party at his house.
ReplyDeleteI thought I was the life of the party, but I must've been a huge twat. At one point, I remember running around the party in his T-shirt and nothing else. I also don't remember what happened to a pair of sweat pants of his, but I do remember having to pay for them. He pretty much shunned me after that.
There was another time when I fell asleep in one guy's room and woke up in his brother's room. His brother didn't mind.
A third time involved pot, vodka and a virgin. Actually, I can think of two times that occurred. It wasn't too long after the second one of those events that found out I was pregnant. I pretty much stopped drinking after that.
Nice neighbors though.
ReplyDeleteI peed and threw up in a mall parking lot one time, don't remember how I got home, not one of my prouder moments. Never did that on anyone or any furniture/floors though.
I had a Halloween party one year and my husband got completely, utterly hammered. I put him to bed before everyone left, but after awhile I heard a huge crash in our room, so I went to check on him and there he was, next to our knocked-over nightstand, getting ready to pee in the corner. I yelled at him like he was our dog - "NO! YOU DO NOT PEE ON THE RUG! NOT A GOOD BOY!"
ReplyDeleteA boyfriend of mine got so drunk that in the middle of the night he got up to pee. Sadly for me, he did it in my makeup drawer.
ReplyDeleteWell, as someone with alcoholics in the family, i dont find any if these stories amusing. Go ahead, crucify me for not having a "sense of humor" .
ReplyDeleteLuckily, I've never had that happen to me but my friend J threw a party once and another friend P (who was totally sober at the time) went to the wrong house. P saw all these cars parked a few doors down from the party house, assumed it was the right house and walked in and was mortified when she saw all these people she didn't know at some sort of Tupperware party. To make matter worse, as P was stammering and making her apologies to the hostess, the woman said, "Aren't you Marilyn's daughter-in law?"
ReplyDeleteP: (with deer in headlights look) "Yes"
Hostess: "I work with her and she invited me to your wedding! It was LOVELY!"
P, who loathes her mother-in-law, btw, could not get out of there fast enough. P was just grateful that her MIL wasn't at the Tupperware party to cement her humiliation.
J's house was actually two doors down. P had been there dozen's of times. I don't know how she made the mistake because the first house was a two-story and J's house is a single story house.
What a great neighbor. This guy needs to definitely call Stanley Steemer and keep their friendship!
ReplyDeleteI once had a 330lb man singing "Like a Virgin" at the top of his lungs, dancing on our coffee table until it disinigrated beneath his feet. Back in college it was just too fucking funny. Not so funny was my room mate peeing in the closet or crawling into bed with us. Or trying to make out with me in front of my boyfriend.
ReplyDeleteNow me, I used to dance in the rain naked on a hot summer's night. I once streaked the length of our street naked in the rain and once in the snow. It was a good 3/4 mile round trip. I once took out an entire table at a Christmas party but my blood sugar was low so it really doesn't count. Now I just go swimming in the nude with all the pool lights on but forget to take my glasses off. Our pool is a party pool so not much of a deep end so I hit my face on the bottom of the pool. I didn't break my glasses but put a nice gash on my face and bruised it up fairly well. Luckily I didn't break my beak.
My husband's nickname is "The Urinary Terrorist." On the occasion he does get drunk, we all try to keep an eye on where he goes to the bathroom.
ReplyDeleteIt's a trap!
ReplyDeleteIt's from the neighbor in Apt. 2B, don't trust it!
My friend drunkenly shit in his dishwasher. Still the best story ever. Still won't use his silverware.
ReplyDeleteThat is a once-in-a-lifetime type of nice neighbour.
ReplyDeleteI wonder if that guy will actually get his neighbor's couch cleaned. Hope they can resolve it and stay cool.
ReplyDeleteHmm, initially I laughed but I think this is a regular occurence for this shirt caped man. How old is this kid? The neighbors are pretty awesome with
ReplyDelete^...with that response.
Delete