If you have ever seen American Psycho, you know that Patrick Bateman is the serial killer in the novel. Well, yesterday Bret Tweeted that he had sent Patrick over to Lindsay Lohan's hotel room to find out exactly why Lindsay failed to show up for work. Lindsay was supposed to do some dubbing for that truly awful movie The Canyons but was a no show. Probably because a rich guest checked in to Chateau Marmont and she had to decide whether she was going to f**k him or steal from him. In an ideal world, both. After they did lines together. With her mom on speaker. Oh, and Michael recording it. Who would ever expect Lindsay to show up for anything work related unless it involves her being on film. Dubbing is not going to get her there.
That picture scares the hell out of me. Oooh new Halloween decoration. Yay! But seriously, get your shiz together girl!! Mess.
ReplyDeleteEnty you need to fire your editor for accidentally posting a picture of Mama Elsa with this story about LiLo
ReplyDeleteCan't concentrate, I just remembered a naked Christian Bale running with a chainsaw. Yummy.
ReplyDeleteVery yummy!!
DeleteHoly crap! That's one fugly picture.
ReplyDeleteI once thought she was a great actress. I guess that kid died long ago and was substituted by this joke. I think he has the biggest guardian angel because she should've been dead a long time ago.
ReplyDeleteThere's so many talented and nice people out there she does not deserve any audience. I wish Enty and everyone else would stop enabling her by posting about her.
There should be a ban on all things Lindsay.
Katsm, that's hilarious. Mama Elsa's face scares the crap out of me. I hate when the camera goes in for a close-up. Eeek!
ReplyDelete@cali did u see when the Miami housewives were describing what Mana Elsa looks like so the new housewives could recognize her and they were trying to be so polite and finally I think Adriana said she had unfortunate plastic surgery which they all quickly agreed with but in the soft, sympathetic almost whispering voice? I'm glad they addressed the elephant in the room!
DeleteTeam Bateman! I love American Psycho, especially with Bale as a visual ;)
ReplyDeleteWell, of course he has a sense of humor about this. Lindsay is about a thousand times more valuable to humanity than Bret Easton Ellis, and she was more important even before she was born. That hack hasn't sold a book for ever.
ReplyDelete@Katsm0711
ReplyDeleteThanks for the laugh! That entire scene was so amazing!
Mama Elsa is terrifying. So is LiLo.
I have to disagree with those who want this trick banned. Every time I see her picture and read about some stupid crap she's done, makes me feel that although I've done some stupid stuff in my life, I've NEVER done anything approaching this level of stupidity and gives me a little boost. A little selfish, I know, but I take whatever boost I can get.
ReplyDeleteOk so he sent some guy to check on bet but what was her excuse this time? Inquiring minds want to know.
ReplyDeleteGoodness...what will her rock bottom look like?
ReplyDeleteMy husband saw that picture and said, "It's creepo La Hohan." He knows nothing about the celeb gossip world, I can't believe he was able to recognize her.
ReplyDeletehaha that's funny @seaward!
Deletehad to google. the canyon, is a great film. very sad, though.
ReplyDeletehey BEE, you get what you pay for.
ReplyDeleteNow married to an entertainment lawyer in Sherman Oaks!*
ReplyDelete*A Mystery Science Theater joke, not an Enty reference
I've never seen a sober person that looks as terrible as she does. I know it's not the point of the post, but I cannot get past that picture. And she's 26! TWENTY-SIX. She looks like some used-up, drug-addled, old hooker society gave up on 15 years ago. Even if she were to get her shit together, clean herself up, get a couple-87 facials, she'd still look old and used-up. It's a shame her parents are far too selfish to ever realize what they've done to their children.
ReplyDeleteWhat was Patrick Bateman wearing??
ReplyDeleteShe looks horrible. So old and warn looking. What a shame. She's far beyond recovery.
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ReplyDeleteSo off topic but I just had to say it:
ReplyDeleteI am so sick of Taylor Swift's disingenuous sad puppy dog act.
That is all.
Argh, my eyes! My eyes!
ReplyDeleteI seriously read that as he sent JUSTIN Bateman and I was like, "why would he send Justin Bateman to get Lindsay?"
ReplyDeleteI need more caffeine, obvs.
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ReplyDeleteDumbass just did Lindsay a favor by even implying in a roundabout way that she does or could potentially have any connection to or equality with Christian Bale.
ReplyDeleteI'm sure that fact is not lost on Lindsay, who still expects to win an Oscar by 30 and thinks she's in the prime of her life.
Kats, you know those ladies are scared to death that Mama Elsa will beat their asses or put a curse on them, so they'd better be careful what they say.
ReplyDeleteI like Marisol, but she needs to be careful with the face work or she's going to end up like her crazy Mama.
@Amber. 26 indeed. She looks like a 56-y-o real housewife who's had surgery to make her (in her mind) look 48.
ReplyDeleteI wish this young woman would take any money she has and go to rehab for six months. There are cheap, bare-bones rehabs, where you clean the bathrooms and share a bedroom.
Six months of that, where nobody cares who she is, could be a life-saver/life-changer for Lindsay. She could lose the face bloat, get off the drugs, and emerge as someone with a life ahead of her.
She's only TWENTY SIX. And she only has one life.
I know everybody is sick of her shenanigans, as am I, but her parents are mostly to blame for the nightmare that is LL today.
at 26 we can stop blaming her parents. i know plenty of people with shitty parents who don't become drug addicts and plenty of people with awesome parents that did. this is about her now.
ReplyDeleteThanks Jax. I've been saying that for ages. She's 26. She's considered a grown up in most states (not CA apparently where they treat her like she's 12). I'm sorry we didn't get a chance to arrest her while she was in Texas filming Machete. Better luck next time...
ReplyDeleteAm I crazy or is she getting that "meth" look about her? I would not be shocked to learn she's cooking it at the Marmont
ReplyDelete@jax: How many of your friends with shitty parents were stars/celebrities in their teens? I have no idea what it must be like, but I'd imagine you are surrounded by drug-dealers and people who leech off you, telling you what you want to hear.
ReplyDeleteTo repeat, I'm sick of her shenanigans. She's not an ordinary former teenager with bad parents. In fairness, the internet gangs were holding their breath waiting for her to be legal. I can't imagine that. Being a teen is tough enough.
I wish she would try harsh rehab for six months or a year, somewhere remote and nowhere near CA.
I hope she avoids the 27 club.
ITA w/Jax.
ReplyDelete@Jamie2 - by the time my mom was born, her parents were divorced and neither wanted her. She was named by her grandmothers and moved between them throughout her life. Every now and again her mother would try to get custody of her. She would beat and starve her. A neighbor called my mom's grandfather to come take her before she was beaten to death. Her mother then took all my mom's belongings and burned them.
My mom is a wonderful, caring, loving mother and human being. She didn't have all the money in the world at her disposal to turn her life around. Lindsay has help any corner she turns and instead blames, blames, and blames everyone else. Give me a fucking break.
It just really annoys me that she wants and expects people to take her as a serious actress yet she is far from professional and doesn't even try to create even a half good image for herself. I think it really sucks that she's gotten 'work' recently because now she probably thinks that she is still really relevant and a great actress. Barf!
ReplyDeleteJamie2- how many young actors do we see who DON'T abuse drugs? A lot more than do, but that's not as interesting to TMZ.
ReplyDeleteShe's a drug addict who makes bad choices.
fred savage
ReplyDeletericky schroeder
hilary duff
harry potter kids
Jonathan Taylor Thomas
Kim Fields
Mario Lopez
Miley Cyrus (satvia, ok)
Jamie Lynn Spears (baby, no drugs)
Abigail Breslin
Dakota Fanning
Ashley Olsen (MK still not sure)
Raven Simone
Tempest Bledsoe
Alyssa Milano
I'd go on but you get the point...not every child actor becomes a drug addict.
I didn't get any humor from his tweet, just a lot of anger. I think it could have been a funny joke, but it didn't come off that way to me.
ReplyDelete@ms Cool - that story about your mom made me cry. Bless her.
ReplyDeleteI think Brett Easton Ellis (who names their kids that unless they want them to grow up and become a douche?) hired Lilo just so he could tweet that. You can't tell me he didn't know she'd bring a little drams, and a lot of he was lucky.
What the hell did I just type?
ReplyDeleteBale's Bateman screwing the whores while making love to himself with his eyes will forever be one of Those Moments in movie history you just wish you hadn't seen with your parents for me.
ReplyDeleteAnd speaking of whores...god, Lohan looks absolutely disgusting. Why do people want anything from her but lots and lots of distance? She's not even a human trainwreck, she's just...pitiful. Someone put the poor thing out of our misery please!
@MadLyb - Thank you for your kind comment. My mom is such a sweet soul and it is amazing how she became such a good mother based on instinct rather than what she observed. I wish there was a way I could go back in time and find a loving, good mother for my mom so she would know just for one day what that feels like.
ReplyDelete@jax, Ms. Cool: Have you seen Lindsay's parents shenanigans? That girl didn't have a chance, with parents like hers and the delusions that being a teen star bring on. The young teen brain is simply not developed enough to work the way the adult one does.
ReplyDeleteI wished her a long trip to a tough rehab where she could learn that she could make it on her own.
@Ms. Cool: I'm sorry about your mom's experience; We all have problems like that in our families and I'm not going to out-CSB you.
Britney, Lindsay: I know they have made more money than I have, but I don't envy them one little bit.
Jamie 2
ReplyDeleteDoes your CSB mean Cool Story Bro? I had to look it up. Please tell me I'm wrong. Her mother was beaten and starved by her own mother
@Sunny - You're right. That's what CSB means. I said I wouldn't out-do the story by the other commenter. I could.
ReplyDeleteI think it's why I still feel something for Lindsay and Britney. I know when you grow up under bad circumstances, you are not an adult at 26. You can be addicted and haggard and look like you're 40, but you are not an adult.
There's a vital part of the teen years when you get over the hormones and establish limits for yourself and your parents. It is the starting point for the self-esteem and reasoning that carry you for the rest of your life.
I don't think Lindsay or Brit ever developed that part of their brains.
I'd love to see Lindsay check out of LA for a year. Lose contact with her parents and her dealers, if she has them. Ahem.
Personally, I love Brett Easton Ellis' novels. I think he chose Lilo because he's in on the joke; it wasn't for her acting skills or work ethic, that's for damn sure. But he knew she'd do something like a direct to Netflix softcore porn flick, out of desperation (and under the illusion she's still one of the "it" girls).
ReplyDeleteAmerican Psycho is one of the better movies from his novels, but Less Than Zero is also really great. When I watch RDJ in it, I wonder how close to his real life that character was.
@Jamie 2 - You can go ahead and outdo my story. I'm not looking to one-up anyone in tragedies. You are right, we all know people who have faced insurmountable odds. I'm saying I know someone who faced insurmountable odds and beat them as best she could without loads of cash, rich people willing to help, drugs, or alcohol. Lindsay has outlasted the violin and is no longer a victim of anyone but her lying, manipulative self.
ReplyDeleteI have been on this site for a long time and this is the first time I've actually taken offense to something said to me here. Referring to my mom's situation as one you could CSB so lightheartedly boggles my mind. I forget how sterile and brazen people can be on the Internet, especially with the commenters here as most people are pretty darn nice.
That picture reminds me of photos of old-timey 50's bleached-blonde bombshells after they were old, washed up, and trying to hang on to their youth. Google Images - Mamie Van Doren. This is a long link but.... Creepy resemblance!
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ReplyDeleteMamie Van Doren link - yikes!
ReplyDeletehttp://inyourface.blog.ocregister.com/2008/06/13/buddhist-sex-kitten-mamie-van-doren-vs-the-signs-of-aging/