Over on twitter, I seem to find a new fascinating story about someone in Florida almost everyday. yesterday it was the teen who shot his peen and then blamed it on a mystery intruder. Today it is a woman who was arrested after pulling a gun on a man and demanding money from him. That would be bad, but not crazy. What makes this crazy is the woman was having sex with him at the time she pulled the gun. Crazier, but not flat out pink hair crazy. What about if I also add that they were having sex and she pulled out the gun and demanded the money all while he was actually driving the car. When she pulled out the gun and demanded the money, he crashed. The woman fled the scene, but police found her yesterday.
The heat in Fl. must be getting to everyone! I still would move there though! and then maybe you can write about me Enty:)
ReplyDeleteWhy, she doesn't look one bit crazy to me!!!
ReplyDeleteTalk about multi- tasking!!
ReplyDeleteLOL @goheels
ReplyDeleteLOL he's totally right. I am/was on a podcast (it's kind of in limbo-mode right now), and I read news items. I always pick one random, crazy story - usually from Fark - and I'd say about 75% of them ended taking place in FL!
ReplyDeleteI say we give it to Cuba.
ReplyDeleteHer eyes scare me. They seem to be following me!
ReplyDeleteOk, I'm trying to visualize this....and THEN she pulls out a gun...from where?
ReplyDeleteHer mug shot is a living emoticon: o_O
I thought the same thing! Hahahaha!!!
DeleteI am on the opposite corner of the US from Florida (let's forget about Alaska for a minute). I think I'm happy about that :) But they sure do make for interesting "news".
ReplyDeleteMy Irish grandpa always told me never to trust someone with crazy eyeballs...
ReplyDeletetracynator - perfection! hahahaha!
ReplyDeleteLOL@tracynator! An actual LOL!
ReplyDeleteStop with these stories! They make me homesick for life in South Florida, which is a little less skanky than the rest of Florida, but still skanky.
ReplyDeleteoh please south florida is the worst part of florida...it has miami
DeleteBarton - I find FL really fascinating. My mom had a condo there, and it was really interesting to see how on the beach-side of the street there would be all these huge, gorgeous condo buildings. Then on the other side of the street there are trailer parks. There's a Target somewhere in the area of Sand Key/Reddington that is easily the grossest Target I've ever been to. However, PJ's is the shit.
ReplyDeleteI have family in Reddington Shores which is beautiful, but drive a few minutes the other way and it's a different story! Love the bums in every corner with a sign asking for money which they then use to buy beer at the corner store
DeleteWhen I moved to South Beach in the 90s, my parents called to make sure I was all right. "Oh, someone just got shot to death in front of my apartment on Meridian," I said, "but I think it was roommates fighting over a drug deal. I'll be okay." We shared a merry laugh.
ReplyDeleteMy college friend/acquaintance Tyler Coates writes for Blackbook Magazine and often writes articles based on his Google alert for Florida women. Here's one, but he has several (if I get this to link):
ReplyDeleteOkay, here it is
ReplyDelete*karen* - OMG ahahahahahhahahaa!!! That story is AWESOME! I'm going to have to start following your friend. Love so much that he does that.
ReplyDeleteI was on a volunteer trip with two people from Miami Beach. They introduced themselves to me as, we are from Miami Beach and we don't claim the rest of the state. They were the most obnoxious snotty Floridians I've ever met. That is the beauty of FL.. If you don't live in "Miami Beach" (as they called it), you were just disgusting and awful. Miami Beach/South Beach is nice, but what fucking snobs, you live in FLORIDA.
ReplyDeleteI've been wanting to get this off my cheats for awhile, sorry for the ranting post...t
That is what I'd call a nut job.
ReplyDeleteThat is what I'd call a real nut job.
ReplyDeleteHi, ljsmed, I once spent 8 months on South Beach without even going across the causeways to downtown Miami. Finally, I sneaked out to the airport to fly to New York. It's true, Miami Beach is an entirely separate world -- although at least it has the causeways for those people who desire to touch the rest of Florida. It's quite snooty sometimes, truly, you're right.
ReplyDeleteSeriously, the F in WTF now stand for Florida.
ReplyDeleteand to think I wanted to move to Florida in my younger years..not so much now.
ReplyDeleteNot ALL of Florida is like this. Granted, 80% of it truly is...but Barton is right, South Florida is generally pleasant. I live on the SW coast now, which (so far) seems to be nice as well.
ReplyDeleteBut once you get north of Lake Okeechobee, you're headed into the "Leftovers of the Confederacy", for sure. Embarassing as all get out. Ocala is the worst to me; they're super right-wing conservative (Tea Partiers all the way) and they have TONS of hate-filled billboards about Obama, abortion, immigration, etc., along I75. It's awful, and makes me ashamed of my home state. And that doesn't even touch on people like this...
/end Florida rant
PS - Her face IS an emoticon! tracynator, best comment of the day.
Cornbread: I remember hearing when I was in Georgia about the folks in Wachula--the way it was described to me, they were hardcore German-American Nazis who regarded Hitler as a quitter, and were every bit as horrible as that description would lead one to believe. (This person had kin in the area, which was the only reason he would ever go there.) Perhaps they're helping pay for the Ocala billboards?...
ReplyDeleteI honestly thought that was a picture of Ali Lohan.
ReplyDeleteRobin, your friend is 110% correct, unfortunately...we have family there. Family we do not claim, and NEVER speak of. Wachula isn't too far from Ocala, either.
ReplyDeleteSide note: John Travolta has an estate in Ocala. Lots of equestrian/aviation enthusiasts in the area. It's a pretty wealthy town, hence the endless billboards.
All the crazy shit is going down in Germany or Florida. Wasn't that a game on Love Line?
ReplyDeleteThat lovely flower in the photo above is from Port Charlotte, Florida over on the west coast. If you're not living in a big city in FL, it's a good chance the area is pretty rural. As in yeeeee HAW!
ReplyDeleteMeanwhile that trick in video that *karen* posted... OMG, she makes the chick up top look like Princess Kate.
Another Florida factoid: one shitty ass rural FL town looks EXACTLY like any other shitty ass FL rural town. When I was leaving FL I drove North and then west and motored through a little town and had a moment of panic and thought I'd put the wrong info into my GPS because it looked EXACTLY like one of the crappy ass towns I used to drive through to get to my brother's house on the west coast of FL. It happened a few more times before I got on the interstate. I would literally rather DIE than have to live in one of those suffocating, backwards, backwoods little whistlestops.
@EmEyeKay I think your grandmother was right about that.
ReplyDeleteUgh, I knew I had avoided googling this for a reason...Port Charlotte is a half hour north of us. :/
ReplyDeleteMango, as someone who grew up in one of those backwards, backwoods, whistlestop towns...there is some Southern charm, but it's difficult to find anymore. Florida isn't anything like what my grandparents grew up with.
But I think every state has its good and bad places. Right? It can't JUST be Florida.
Wow, Kstew's looking kinda tore up.
ReplyDeleteAmber, if you like BlackBook you'll enjoy "Hello Giggles". Look for Heather Watson.
ReplyDeletehttp://hellogiggles.com/
@ Cornbread - True enough, but I'd had enough of Florida and it wasn't just because of friends who live out of state emailing me to ask me WTF I was doing living there whenever they heard some outlandish Florida news story.
ReplyDeleteBTW, I love me some cornbread. And grits. And don't get me started on southern barbecue...
@tracynator
ReplyDeleteThat was perfection o_0
Ah Florida. Land of the hanging chad.
ReplyDeleteSomeone with those kind of multi-tasking skills could do better for herself than hooking.
ReplyDeleteWe are a swing state. That is all:)
ReplyDelete