Friday, August 10, 2012

Pimpa Joe Simpson Busted For DUI


How is it that Pimpa Joe Simpson, can get arrested for DUI almost a week ago, and no one finds out until now? You would have thought he would be easy to spot, what with his, I'm Jessica Simpson's Dad bumper stickers. He used to have the same for Ashlee Simpson, but crossed through it after the whole SNL thing. The other giveaway would have been the pictures of Jessica all throughout the inside of his car. That way he could stare at her breasts from lots of different angles. Anyway, the former preacher who said he didn't drink was busted for DUI around 10pm which is nice and early to be hammered and didn't make bail until almost 10am the next day. That is a long time. Guess no one wanted to come get him. Trying to teach him a lesson.

55 comments:

  1. What a creepy man. I knew bewbs are great and all but c'mon..those are your daughters!

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  2. I wondered the same thing - he was popped (ha!) on the 4th, but it didn't make the news until yesterday.

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  3. Happy Friday CDANers!

    Let's all drink to Pappa Joe!

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  5. who bailed him out? It's not like he's broke, he probably called his lawyer who got the money and bailed him out first thing in the morning. I've bailed non-celeb people out of jail before. They get arraigned starting at 8-9 am and then someone can post bail for them.

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  6. @dia, don't forget to blame Oprah! :-)

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  7. did anyone else see the preview of oprahs interview with rihanna? i dont know what her tolerance level is, but she didnt appear to be chain smoking anything or doing shots.

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  8. Happy friday dia and to everyone! This has been the most stressful and sleep deprived week of my life, I am thanking God its friday for sure today!

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  9. @Spunky - Yes, we haven't blamed her for anything this week! I couldn't sleep last night. I'll blame that on her. It couldn't possibly be that coffee I decided to drink at 5pm to soothe my caffeine craving. Damn you, Oprah!

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  10. Carebear - Me too! All week with the no sleep. What gives, Oprah! Haha!

    At least we can all sleep in tomorrow. Zzzzzz....

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  11. Eeew this picture is gross.

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  12. Must be something in the air. I haven't been able to sleep this week either. I'm exhausted.
    Thanks a lot Oprah!

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  13. Happy Friday, dia :)

    Pimpa Joe should move to my new building. Just found out last night we have a back door entrance to the bar next door and don't have to go outside. Hah.

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  14. @dia-I work 6 days a week so I still have to wake up tomorrow but half day today! I'm taking a nap :) my sis in law had to be rushed into surgery for a c-section on tues, mom and babe are fine but we were very close to losing the babe. But we didn't! She's perfect and I'm very very thankful for the doctors and nurses.

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    1. So glad everyone is OK. Hugs to new momma and baby, and her amazing doctors and nurses! Hope you can get some rest too.

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    2. Welcome to world, new baby with great story to tell for rest of your life!!!!!

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  15. Well it's nearly midnight Friday night for me so have a wonderful day and I'll see you all in about 8 hours or so.

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  16. Ooh Amber. That sounds dangerous (and kinda awesome...)

    When does happy hour start? I need to celebrate the end of this moderately crappy week AND the end of Mercury Retrograde. The demon that makes us fight and scream and communicate poorly. *yes, I'm a little bit woo woo*

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    1. Yes yes and yes. I knew something was wrong this week. Everyone was super not nice to me. But now... It's Friday, Friday, Friday. :)

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  17. Night Astro! Scuba time, coming soon :)

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  18. @ rej - congrats to your family despite the scare! Mushel that little baby's face :)

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  19. I must be sapping everyone's energy! After spending the last few weeks taking care of my boyfriend's grandfather and not being anywhere except work, the hospital, doctors' offices, and grandad's house and being more tired than i ever imagined i could be, I'm perky as FUCK today! Sorry, folk. Love you, though! Hopefully you will hold no grudge for the fact that I energy vampired your asses.

    Also, if he got busted in texas at 10pm, there aren't always overnight judges so him getting out at 10am is actually pretty early.

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    1. Darn you disco! Just kidding. You earned it after the week you had. Perk on Perky Girl!

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  20. Congratulations, bear! Glad everyone is healthy!

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  21. Yeah, he was/is a reverend, and I am a reptile. He is sooo gross!!!!!!

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  22. aw thanks guys! i felt so bad for my brother and sis in law, she was their first (and most likely last)baby so they were freaked out! My sis in law is beyond wonderful and handled the whole situation like a champ. They go home today and I get to spend all of sunday with her! I cant wait!!

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  23. @rejectedcarebear
    I'm so happy for you all! Enjoy that little baby, they grow up so fast.

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  24. Shout out to the sleepless ones! Me too. I'm in a jury waiting room, ready to keel over if I don't yawn my face off first. Reading of the other sleepyheads perked me up a bit.

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  25. smash, who was not nice to you?! Lemme at'em!

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  26. He always looks like he's staring down his daughters' shirts.

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  27. This doesn't surprise me at all - he's seemed like quite the drinker to me before.

    Ugh this has been the week from hell for me too. Thank sweet 8lb 6oz baby Jesus it's almost over. In addition to recovering from a liver biopsy, a crazy bout of vertigo (what am I 80?) and dealing with a sick 11 month old, found out my creepy cousin (who asked me to take naked pictures when I was 8) was arrested & charged with several counts of sex with a minor and child prostitution (only upside is we're pretty sure he's going to get 10+ years... I hope it's life). So emotionally & physically, I'm spent.

    But next week, my birthday! So hopefully it should be better.

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    1. Megs, thats quite a week!!! Hugs!!!!!

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    2. Sorry Megs. Hope you can get some rest! Big hug!

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  28. That pimpa joe header pic is sooooo gross! So I take it the while family has a problem with alcohol. Must be fun times at family get togethers.

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  29. @rejected carebear, glad alk worked out well.

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  30. Praise be

    Nick was lucky to escape

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  31. must be something in the air....i wake up every night at 3 am...done for the rest of the night

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  32. I remember that set of pictures, her feet were NASTY looking!

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  33. rejectedcarebear = congrats and i am happy all are well! nothing like a new bambino/bambina! still trying to get mine to stop swinging from the chandelier!

    megs = hang in there and glad you escaped the creepy! i loved the ricky bobby reference - hah!

    smash = enjoy the weekend my friend, you deserve it!

    amber + dia = happy Fday to you both!

    disco = you are a good soul! my best friend is going thru the same right now w/ his grand-nana dying in the hospital. those who take care of the old and infirm are heroes so hang tough!

    the rest of my friends, enemies, and frienemies? bless you all and be safe and happy this wknd. i'm nursing a hairline-cracked femur w/o any pain meds (due to obvious past issues...not a good idea, lol). trying to limp my way thru the rest of this shoot (mega-ouchie!). on the upside i get to spend more time w/ baby-himmmm so not a bad trade ;-)

    re:pimpa joe = pimpa begged someone to introduce him to noomi rapace at an after-preem party (way before prometheus). pimpa then tried to tell her he could manage her career and she'd be a major success. noomi asked him "who are you again?" then told him she'd never heard of jess or ash and to please stay away form her! pimpa thought she was a reality ingenue! hah!

    another time a pal once said he caught a drunk pimpa forcibly trying to crotch-massage a 16yo starlet at a gala. the girl begged my pal to help her. my pal whispered in his ear and told pimpa if he touched the girl again they'd need dental records to i.d. his body! pimpa quietly left the event. what total spunk-spanker he is! btw my pal is a pro athlete and makes michael clarke duncan look like frodo.

    take care everyone!
    (sorry for errors and caps - am on a damned phone -grr!)

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  34. I can't stand DUI'ers.

    And I'm sure, just about anyone who drinks does it at some time or another, on some form or another. YET, they're all worried about someone like me smoking a J. Nice.

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  35. Now Jessica's tweet on Sunday is actually interesting... did she really call her dad out?

    "Responsibility has drastically changed my life! Saturday night drink of choice.... WATER! :)"

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  36. Prayers for @rejectedcarebear, @discoflux, @Meg and @Himmmm - along with all of you sleepless people. Insomnia sucks!
    We had a loss on Monday - my Grandpa passed away. So glad he didn't linger on for a long time and that the family was able to say goodbye before he went.
    As for the Simpson clan, it's hard having a creepy father that's interested in young girls. There is a special place in hell for perverts.

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    1. Jesse, sorry for your loss. Love and prayers to you and your family.

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  38. The caption for that photo could be, "Wait! Which one are you? Ob, yeah, small boobies, Ashlee. Sure wish I was looking at Jess's big ones!!". He us so skivvy. Notice u dont see mother anywhere near him. Ugh!

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  39. Thanks @auntliddy, @Himmmm & @Jesse D. I got really really lucky with the whole "situation" - it could have been a lot worse. I've been counting my lucky stars all the time this week.

    @Himmmm - Hope you feel better soon - hairline fractures are a killer. Papa Joe has always given me a bad sexual vibe - good for your friend for taking a stand with him. And it's funny how many Ricky Bobby references one can use in daily life ;-)

    @Jesse D - So sorry for your loss! My thoughts are with you :-(

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  41. I am totally down with acupuncture, hv used many times- for knee pain, migraines- it really works!

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  42. 'Pimpa Joe Simpson' really??? That is his name?? Surely he was given that name as birth, he can't have chosen it!!

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  43. @sian
    Joe Simpson considered himself a manager, and repped some different acts in addition to his daughters Jessica and Ashley. I believe he went by Papa Joe (ugh puke) but people jokingly call him Pimpa Joe feeling he pimped out his daughters (kinda how they call Kris Kardashian PMK for Pimp Mama Kris).

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  44. Joe Simpdusky is such a skeevemeister. I honestly hope the girls haven't had to deal with worse than the ogling.

    Leg fractures suck. I stress-fractured my hip in May and only now am I getting back to my usual active self. I didn't take pain meds because it can mask overuse. But for what it's worth, tub soaks in Epsom salts take the edge off, and a heating pad on the fracture site speeds healing. Thus sayeth my personal trainer who's also an MMA fighter.

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  45. Also, I realize that movies aren't real but I enjoy picturing Noomi Rapace putting a beat down on Joe Simpson, Dragon Tattoo-style.

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  46. Ok. I believe :)

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  47. Jesus. How did I miss this. Sweet dreams to all. Especially the young babies out there. Let the moms and dads have a good nights rest.

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