Tom Cruise's Private Pain? - Kneepads Does It Again
Kneepads put Tom Cruise on their cover this week and pulled out their extra big kneepads for the story. I don't know how many favors Tom's people had to call in, but I guarantee you that if John Travolta ever decides to come out, Kneepads has been promised that cover. They are going to get some huge payback for basically telling the world that Tom is the victim here. This just shows you that they will publish anything a publicist tells them to publish. You cannot look at that cover and think to yourself it is in any way objective. It's not. The sad thing is, if they did some actual reporting they could make a big difference in the lives of people who only get their gossip through Kneepads and are pretty sure that Tom & John Travolta are sexy leading men who are so straight that it hurts their spine to be that straight and that Scientology is a wonderful support group.
One and only visit.
ReplyDeleteThat's a hiliarous cover. It's hard to believe I used to eat up these magazines and believe them years ago. It's weird listening to my mom and sister believe all that stuff, but you can't tell them anything. They won't believe me, so I keep my mouth shut now.
ReplyDeleteGlad to have you all!
I AGREE RENOBLONDEE. People magazine makes me sick nowadays because of the fakeness inside!
ReplyDeleteooh, looking forward to updates on how many times he sees her! really!
ReplyDelete(and JT coming out!)
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *inhale* AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteWell said
DeleteDitto!!!!!
I do believe he's shattered about losing Suri, but I think it's less about a dad losing his daughter and more about losing a future scientology leader.
ReplyDeleteI'm sure you guys saw this gallery but if not, it's worth looking back at tom and nicole... if only for tom dressed in a blue velvet suit.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.usmagazine.com/celebrity-news/pictures/nicole-kidman-and-tom-cruises-hollywood-romance-2012186/23233
so much matching (controlling!)
Tom needs a new surgeon. He looks like he's morphing into manorexic Ben Stiller.
ReplyDeleteKneepads? More like xenupads
ReplyDeleteHe's more worried about what Miscavidge is going to do to him as punishment for losing to Katie and blowing up Co$ in the public eye.
ReplyDeletePoor Tom. I had no idea how much he was hurting. He must be truly devastated. I can't believe what a crafty bitch Katie is.
ReplyDeleteBut Kneepads says so, so it's true.
@ rejectedcarebear , LOL.
ReplyDelete" xenupads "
I always thought Xenu was their version of Satan.
ReplyDeleteWe need a new name for Mr. Cruise?
ReplyDeleteA CDAN reader previously posted that 'Tammy Cruise' needs to be replaced (sorry, don't remember who it was). I stink at this part buy you guys are sooooo creative ..........
*church lady voice*
ReplyDeleteSATAN???
Can't read 'Xenu' without Olivia Newton-John leaping into my head singing Xanadu
ReplyDeleteOh no! That was to Vicki's comment - not Agent **it!!!
ReplyDelete@Vicki yep, Xenu is satan. I don't think anyone else on this blog has realized that yet. Hubbard is their god, Xenu is the devil.
ReplyDeleteSunny- hahaha , Church Lady kind of works .
ReplyDeleteSeaward, that's what I thought.
ReplyDeletePRAISE XENU!
Just his ego is broken...
ReplyDeleteSunny - you made me laugh! Good morning, Sunshine :-)!
ReplyDeleteI've been meaning to tell you - whenever I put on my workout clothes (really just shorts and tees), I think about your description of your entire family headed off to the gym in the '80's wearing leotards and headbands :-). Wasn't that just the worst? I blame Jane Fonda, or maybe Flashdance? My dance recital pics from that era are a sight, I know that much! Down to the sequined headband.
Haha...I do like "church lady" for a new name.
ReplyDelete@Agent other sites use Tom Thunb.
ReplyDeleteHow about Tombelina or Cruise Control?
Kneepads is enty's satan.
ReplyDelete* Thumb
ReplyDeleteFor the love of Xenu! We must pray for our son Tommy Girl in his hour of despair. Lets all join hands!
ReplyDeleteHow about Tom Thumbelina?
ReplyDeleteOh Vicki, you make me laugh.
ReplyDeleteI am still thinking about your suggestion for Katie to take Suri to Roswell for Halloween.
Really Xenu is their devil? Interesting...
ReplyDeleteNow I REALLY want that T-shirt!
Xenu is bad? I thought the Scienonuts wanted to be Xenu, since they are aliens and all.
ReplyDeleteNutty Flavor and I would prefer a name isn't feminized, like being female is an insult or slight, ya know?
ReplyDelete(Nutty, I hope you don't mind me throwing your name in here.)
I'm behind Tom Thumb until further notice. Not because of his small stature, but because of his small character/hiding behind Scientology.
agree with Frufra about feminized name. like the cruise control suggestion!
ReplyDeleteCrazy!
ReplyDeleteI was thinking female because he's a little bitch.
ReplyDelete>:)
Did anyone else see the pics of Tom and Suri for their reunion? Suri is clinging to him with such force. I feel really bad for her. Can't tell if Tombelina actually cares or just a photo op.
ReplyDeleteOK, finally figured out how to post here. Can't even remember what I was going to say!
ReplyDeleteI could live with Cruise Control.
ReplyDeleteIt's been years since I read up on Scientology, so I prob don't have all the details right, but it was Xenu who made/is in charge of thetans. The thetans are the aliens inside all our bodies that Co$ audits out of your body.
ReplyDeleteI thought NuttyFlavor was a Scientologist too.
ReplyDeleteI got it!
ReplyDeleteTommy's new name....
McGlib.
Pretty sure it was Nutty and I ranting together on another thread. Lord knows my memory is all perimenopause - y and shit. But I think it was Nutty, and I've never thought she had $ciento-leanings. But help me out here, people!
ReplyDeleteGood work, Vicki! I like it.
ReplyDeleteSo it's Tom Thumb or Cruise Control? TT or CC.
ReplyDeleteWas hoping for something with more drama but my brain is on autopilot. Need coffee first
@Frufa
ReplyDeleteGood morning! Your comment made me laugh - thanks! I think we were channeling Olivia Newton John from the Let's Get Physical video. I totally remember digging through my sister's box of terrycloth braided sweatbands for the perfect one to match my getup. Thankfully I saved my pink and white checkered leg warmers for school days. Duh. (I also remember throwing my silky Dove shorts on over said leotard. Gross!!!!!)
Wouldn't be hilarious if readers could submit their worst dance recital costumes? I wasn't in dance, but I have clear recollection of my friend Kara's sequined mini top hat (with a chin strap mind you) shimmied off to the side. Her troop jazzed it up to Jump (For My Love). Still love that song
Love it @Vicki!
ReplyDeleteMcGlib.
No one is going to beat McGlib. @Vicki -seriously, lady. SNL writer. Look into it
ReplyDeleteOMG - I danced to Jump also in recital!! Good times - and I def had a sequined headband on then. I believe the leotard was black with a sequin rainbow running diagonally from my left shoulder! You must also know that I was an awkward 8th grader and I wore a size 14. Not a confidence-booster, that outfit :-).
ReplyDeleteOk, looked back at my convo with Nutty this weekend (under the pic of Tom "kissing" his costar), and she suggested L. Ron Cruise. Whattya think?
Yes, dia, i did. And the more i see suri, the more i think there is something seriously wrong with her. She cant relate to ither kids. It looked to me like she was scared of that puppy. She clings to her blanket and stuffed elephant constantly. She never smiles, never enjoys doing any normal kid activities. She clings to her parents , practically wraps herself around them. She diesnt like the paps at all, yet katie parades her around for them all the time. I think ghis little girl may be a bit autistic. Doesnt like crowds, loud noises, cant relate to others. I have never seen a picture of her smiling! Thats idd, considering all the shits we've seen of her. It seems to me this little girl needs some time out of the spotlight, nice and quiet, so she can get centered. I think perhaps both parents are trying to turn her into something shes not capable of being. Anyone else nitice this? And im not being mean or gossipy, im thinking of suri.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
DeleteThe only reason Tom is shattered is because Katie beat him to the divorce and he didn't get to CONTROL everything.
ReplyDeleteNow him playing the victim THAT is really funny! Yeah, that big bad Katie is a real diva, don't ya know...I just don't know how the poor pathetic thing (Tom) endured it...(cybersarcasm!)
@auntliddy - i don't think anyone should diagnose people they have never met with autism, especially when the only pictures you see of them are pap photos. Any normal kid WOULD look uncomfortable when they're being swarmed by crazy strangers, who are shouting things at their parents.
ReplyDeleteCertainly not diagnosing, just making observation.
DeleteWhen you say that it seems to you like she might be autistic, how is that not diagnosing? And I'd also like to know where you got your degree...
ReplyDeleteI do hv degree but still not diagnosing. Just observing. If i said" i think she may be part pusstcat", does that mean im diagnosing? Nope. Just opinion.
DeleteCathy, Suri has been diagnosed by some commenters as being a sociopath also.
ReplyDeleteauntliddy, I didn't think Suri was afraid of the puppy. It looked more like her throwing a tantrum because she couldn't get one.
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure there is anything wrong with Suri, other than she has been given everything she wants, and is completely sheltered. Of course she doesn't know how to relate to other kids, and she can't handle being told no.
@cathy - I think @auntliddy made some valid points. And then she apologized. No need to get snarky.
ReplyDeleteIf Suri can't relate to other children, it's probably because she hasn't been exposed to many. She always seems to be around her parents, and if they truly had her best interests at heart, they would stop dragging her around for all these pap shots.
ReplyDeleteExactly!!!!
DeleteThink we should we vote at the end of the day/night? (There's a lot of PM readers,I think).
ReplyDeleteHelp !
It has to be the best because other blogs think CDAN readers are nuts.
@vicki - I think you should write for Patton Oswalt. Seriously, read his Tweets (twats, whatever).
I'm not getting snarky - I just think it's really not okay to try and diagnose a kid you've never met, especially when the only pictures you see of her are pap photos. She didn't choose her parents or her life, so it's bad enough that she's being traumatized every day by getting cameras shoved in her face by strangers who shout stuff at her parents every time she's outside. Any normal kid would look unhappy during that, so I just find it ridiculous when people use that as evidence of some underlying emotional/health condition.
ReplyDeleteSnark= where did you get your degree, "ridiculous", etc, now irs an almost shame aunt liddy fest. Stop.
DeleteThanks missy!! Everyone entitled to their own opinion. I hoPe im wrong!
DeleteAgent**it, I like to think of you as the Chairman of the Board around here (chairperson?, since I raised the gender stink), so I say you make the ground rules, and we will abide by them.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I believe there were some photos of her with other kids after a dance class last week, but the other kids were conveniently cropped out.
ReplyDeleteSuri is adorable and trying really hard to be normal. In the pics of her out with Katie and her grandma at the zoo, she was smiling in some of them but in many she looks like my grandson looks when he's learning something new and exciting, just absorbing the moment. She looks, to me, to be a 'normal' little girl who is experiencing things normal little girls experience at her age: the zoo, ice cream, pet stores, gymnastics. She pouts when she can't have a puppy. Normal. She doesn't like people in her face all the time. Who would?! Her parents have their agendas, which sucks for her but I don't blame Katie at this point. This is about Suri getting free of that cult as much as Katie and the only way to do that is publicly. Unless they cut Tom free, she will always be their target. Just hoping things settle down for the little one. Quite a few pics of Suri smiling over the years and I imagine there will be many more to come as they break free and she's allowed more 'normal' people into her life, such as grandmas, aunts, cousins, friends.
ReplyDeleteNew name-TomCrash? TomGnat? Freak of Nature?
ReplyDeleteAnd ITA with Cathy. But I also will say I don't think anyone is trying to act ugly here (former kindergarten teacher here - hug it out, people!).
ReplyDelete@ Auntliddy, this is an innocent little girl that not one of us knows how she is behind closed doors! I think it is really wrong to say she is autistic judging by pictures that she does not want to be in!
ReplyDeleteCan we let auntliddy off the hook now? Sheesh!!!
DeleteI'm down with McGlib, but will also accept L. Ron Cruise :)
ReplyDeletePeople can obviously say whatever they want, but I'm in agreement with Cathy. I have 2 little ones, so everyone "diagnosing" Suri as a sociopath and such is a dagger in my heart. Didn't some of you guys hide behind your parents when ONE adult would say Hello to you? Imagine those Pap a-holes swarming you every single day and yelling. It would scare the shit out of me as well
I feel sorry for Suri. Poor kid can't even be taken to the zoo without being stalked by paps. On the other hand, there have been photos of her with another little girl traveling with them, so I think Katie is trying to get her some social activity with kids her own age. But seriously - they can't do anything normal, not even go out for ice cream, without photographers following them - it's sad. But then I think of those photos of Tom going in and out of his hotel yesterday carrying the child, and wonder about all the hotels with underground parking and elevator access from there - why must celebrities be dropped off directly in front of the hotel unless they want to be "seen?" And then I think of the months Katie Holmes has been in NY and stealthily got an apartment, different phones, fired staff.... all totally under the radar. There's a small war being played out in the public eye here and if they want to go underground they can. If my child were that frightened every time we stepped outside, you better believe I'd be making sure NO pap could get to her if I could.
ReplyDeleteSuri reminds me of the Gloria Vanderbilt story, the poor little rich girl that gets pulled from all sides over money, power and control. Gloria at least made it through and gave us the amazing Silver Fox Anderson Cooper. Thank's Glo.
ReplyDeleteAnd no way, no how will Tom turn his back on Suri. Tom doesn't lose, he didn't lose his first 2 kids he won't lose Suri in the long run either. He will stick around to be a thorn in Katie side until he can mind meld Suri into Scientology.
Or I still hold out hope Tom will have a breakthrough one day like others have and turn his back on this f'n cult and be free of it. Then Tom & Katie can raise her as a happpy well adjusted child.
Hug it out people (thx Frufra!) I hope she gets some quiet time and we can go on to gossip about tragic grown ups.
ReplyDeleteIn other news, @Vicki.... Will you write about us all when u join SNL? I would like to be played by The Zooey bc I have giant brown eyes and am super quirky. Can't sing worth a damn but I sure try hard in the shower!
Re Suri ,
ReplyDeleteI never comment on her because she is a child.But I have wondered , what is it like to be Suri?
I'm thinking as a 5-6 year old. You walk out the door and the paps are at eye level taking your pix?
I'd like to see her carrying a water gun and an Avengers S.H.I.E.L.D. and every time the paps got in her face she can shoot and duck.
I don't blame them one bit for carrying her and for her wanting her gung gung with her at all times.
PS - I like the vote idea with the PM peeps. Contest!!!!
ReplyDeleteI vote for Dip Shit, Top Grandpa or L. Ron Cruise.
ReplyDelete@Frufra, thank you, but somebody else already called me an old school marm (amongst many other things):)
ReplyDeleteI thought that it was you that brought up the gender issue but could not remember. It was a good point!
cathy, again, not diagnosing, just saying what it seems like. I dont say it in a happy way. I feel sorry for the kid. But she has had paps in her face all her life, shldbe used to them somewhat. And I highly doubt anyone will read this, say shes autistic based on what i said!!!! I hope she is completely normal and happy in every way. But she is being used btwn parents, even if they arent aware of it.
ReplyDeleteSometimes tho, one must address the elephant in the room.
What about Xenuphobe?
ReplyDeleteIt'll never work....there's way too many Catholics out there that will take offense that "poor Tom" is upset that Suri is going Catholic.
ReplyDelete@Vicki Cupper said...
ReplyDelete"I always thought Xenu was their version of Satan."
More like Stalin or Mao I'd say from what one can find on the net.
I think Miscaviage is their Stalin...
DeleteWhat about XenuProbe!!!
ReplyDeleteTom "Undermy" Thumb
ReplyDeleteMichael Kay from dlisted calls him Tommy Girl - which always makes me smile - just out of curiosity - why does Enty call People "kneepads"?
ReplyDeleteBecause they suck so much celebrity dick, they have to use kneepads.
ReplyDelete@Henriette - Xenu is the galactic overlord who purged alien souls to Earth. Those lost souls inhabited our bodies. They cause us to do bad things and give us bad thoughts. The whole purpose of scientology is to rid the body of these alien souls and become "clear".
ReplyDeleteI highly recommend the South Park episode "trapped in the closet" for a humorous, yet accurate, description of this.
Your name always reminds me of the Mr. Rodgers kitty puppet.
Is Kneepads a Scientology publication now?
ReplyDeleteChrist I wish I'd woken up on time this morning... sigh...
ReplyDeleteMY VOTE: L. Ron Cruise, LRC for short. That's brilliant.
Tom Thumb isn't bad, either.
Love the pic EmEyeK. I like L Ron Cruise also
DeleteAlso down with l ron cruise! Thus wld be funnier if it wasnt so tragic that tom is completely under tgeur spell!
DeleteI like Tombot, because the real Tom, left years ago, to be replaced by a CO$ robot.
ReplyDeleteI like Tom Thumbilina.. It's completely appropriate and also sounds like the lyrics to a Del the Funky Homosapien song !
ReplyDeleteL. Ron Cruise is pretty funny too. He could be known as " The Source Jr. " or just call him " The Sauce " ( but you have to snap your fingers when you say it )
Can't we all just call him "Poor Tom?" That way the threads won't sound any alarms at CoS and steppy can take a nice long vacation.
ReplyDeleteCan't keep up !
ReplyDeletePlease add on the nominations that I miss
@1PM EST
L. Ron Cruise(LRC)
McGlib (McG)
Tom Thumb (TT)
Tom Thumbelina (TT ?)
Tom "Undermy" Thumb (TUT)
Cruise Control (CC).
Xenuphobe (Xp)
XenuProbe (XP)
I just nominated the MiscAvenger!
DeleteNellie posted this on the other Co$ post, but it is too good not to share here.
ReplyDeleteTom Cruise Auditions New Wife: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xZzczBTa8rI&feature=g-all-u
Thank you Nellie!
That video is hilarious.
ReplyDeleteDid you read :
DropOfAmbrosia comment :
"mission impossible messiah"
Please tell me DropofAmbrosia is here?
Nothing wrong with People's pro-Tom story...he still has a huge fanbase....people want to believe the fantasy, i'm sure it will sell well
ReplyDeleteHey it is MY Lindsanity day today, go get 'em girl!
ReplyDeleteMaybe using the above logic McG or LRC (my two fav's) thought the SeaOrg was best place to ship a 6 YO off to. No paps in her face and all the time in the world to be alone (in a cold dark seasickness inducing bunker) and "get centered".
Not even Kneepads could get people to believe that Tom is the victim. I mean, even outside of gossip sites, it's pretty common speculation that he and his cult are nuts and their relationship was a contractual one.
ReplyDeletestill voting for L. Ron Cruise. It's too good.
ReplyDeleteBethenny saved her marriage? When did that happen?
ReplyDelete@WUWT?, I was wondering the same thing!
ReplyDeletePeople deciding a child has a psychiatric disorder based on NO information...it's no wonder medications are over prescribed in this country.
ReplyDeleteTry and remember this is a family under very trying times. Show a little respect.
Have you read all the other posts, Steppy? Youre beating it to death.
DeleteStop trying to stir the pot when everything's been resolved. Fuck the fuck off Steppy. Go wank off to your Tommy girl and L. Ron posters.
ReplyDeleteSo a COS/McG post and guess who shows up at the party! And condemning use of medications, ha!
ReplyDeleteDoes Steppy post on ANY other topics or is that above her pay grade? Well I don't think they get paid actually.
I wish there was a drug to cure self righteous condesenscion for Steppy. I'll pay and throw it over the razor wire.
ReplyDeleteI always think of Tom as the Midget Behind the Curtain. He's not really the all-powerful wizard he thinks he is.
ReplyDeleteI nominate The MiscAvenger!!!
ReplyDeleteI vote L Ron Cruise.
ReplyDeleteSteppy! What ame do you vote for?
MiscAvenger cause he's Miscavige's mouth piece.
ReplyDeleteI still like church lady. :)
ReplyDeleteSorry I expressed my opinion.
ReplyDeleteIs this what you want to hear-
Kids should be on medication, preferably decided on by people that have never met them. Divorce is a public spectacle, open to judgment and criticism from the public (especially 6 yr old girls).
Sorry, that is ridiculous.
Please, feel free to criticize me (another person you know nothing about). I am happy to take the emphasis off a family during trying times.
@opie - I post on a variety of issues. Please look around before you make disparaging comments.
@poppypants - I share your irritation with beating a subject to death. However, when it comes to the health and well being of a child - it can't be talked about enough.
I, for one, am in NO way recommending medicating anyone!
Delete@Steppy, omg yes it can, especially since auntliddy qualified her statements. And your condescending, self aggrandizing statements are overbearing. It's not as if you are leading a crusade or a spokesperson for a children's organization or NIMH. You are just an anonymous blogger who is getting some self esteem needs met on a gossip site. Come back to the ground, princess.
DeleteOh, please. Get off your fucking cross. You're a troll, plain and simple. And not even a good one.
ReplyDelete@Bogey, when I first started reading this site i thought Enty was talking about Kim Kartrashian when referring to Kneepads.
ReplyDeleteI vote for L. Tom Cruise also. I also feel bad about how the C list nobody Katie Holmes ruined Tom's life. Sad. Like SP Xenu sad. Or even Tommy Davis stole my buttplug Sad.
What about a variation? L. Tom Hubbard?
ReplyDelete@Steppy
ReplyDeleteWhere's Shelly ?
Where do I begin?
ReplyDelete"The devastated star turns to his inner circle-- and Scientology"
Isn't that one and the same?
@ luckylass - that video was fucking hilarious which leads me to my next point - the jokes and mockery are everywhere. Tommy Girl and the Co$ cult must be shitting their pants. The suggestions that he is gay, that he signs wives to contracts, that he is a bully-- it's all out there. Unless they are keeping all this from him, he must be freaking out. THAT is where his devastation is coming from. He's not shattered because his wife and kid left him. His world is shattered because he's been outed as a bully and a carefully crafted FAKE who's a major player in a soul destroying cult.
Hand me some more popcorn. I hope this doesn't end anytime soon.
The fine folks behind CDAN are sure doing their part to fuel the anti-Scieno backlash. Fine with me. I'm just cringing in advance a little for the inevitable counterattack from COS.
ReplyDelete@5:15 EST
ReplyDeleteIf I missed any, take it over and add the name !
L. Ron Cruise(LRC)
McGlib (McG)
Tom Thumb
Tom Thumbelina
Tom "Undermy" Thumb
Cruise Control
Xenuphobe
XenuProbe
The MiscAvenger
Church Lady
L. Tom Hubbard
BTW, doesn't CDAN seem unusually confident about bashing COS? Multiple negative entries and BI's, day after day, with details that would seem to come from industry insiders or even COS insiders?
ReplyDeleteAnd the worst of the backlash so far has been...Steppy? Hmmmm.
@Seachica- I love The Midget Behind the Curtain. That should be thrown into the ring.
ReplyDeleteIf it's too long, I vote for LRC.
Glad you could focus your hate on me and leave this poor family alone :)
ReplyDeleteOh, and if you think being compassionate merits ridicule - I feel sorry for you.
I made the mistake of suggesting People was being sympathetic to Tom Cruise in a comment form last week and set off all kinds of shit storm and was accused of being a Scientologist (I'm not). Glad to see i'm not the only one who thinks People is nuts though.
ReplyDeleteOn a side note, I hate to think how much hate mail you get enty. Do they go through your rubbish?
RonTom?
ReplyDeleteOr RonTomTom to evoke RinTinTin: he's following the master like an obedient puppy.
@ Agent**It - I was joking about XenuProbe. Just thought is was funny after XenuPhobe.
ReplyDeleteI just want something easy to type.
"MiscAvenger cause he's Miscavige's mouth piece."
ReplyDeleteI wonder if that's still true. According to COS insiders, Miscavige is a rabidly abusive and arrogant little elf, but seems to be fairly smart and cunning about how he runs what he clearly knows is a cult. Between the couch jumping and his fading stardom, Tom has become as much a liability as an asset to COS, and Miscavige doesn't seem to buddy-buddy around with Tom as much as he used to do.
I hope so, I hope it blows up in both their faces!
DeleteI also like King TUT (Tom "Undermy" Thumb)
ReplyDelete@Frufa
ReplyDeleteHow did I miss the description of your (jewel encrusted???) rainbow leotard? Gold!!
Dia -- I think XenuProbe is hilarious!
ReplyDeleteThx! Ok it's stays on the list
DeleteAs predicted the poor, sad, lonely, blindsided Tom stories are coming out.
ReplyDeleteI could never get into studying COS. I can't even study the insanity of it. L.Ron Hubbard was just too horrid of a writer for me. If you are going to do a cult around a writer, make it a good one! I can see a cult around F. Scott Fitzgerald or T.S. Eliot, but a Hubbard? Please! Heck, why not Mary Wollstonecraft Shelley?
ReplyDelete@ agentIt : I still like The Sauce ( fingersnap $
ReplyDeleteHenriette, UGH!! I HATED Frankenstein in high school. A Lovecraftian cult would make more sense than L. Ron "Pederast" Hubbard.
ReplyDeletePraise Cthulhu!
GMD (gay midget dwarf) is still my fave!!
ReplyDeleteSo let's see: Cruise's people have so far planted that hilarious "exclusive" about how Katie was appalled by his orgies with women (HEH) and now People is yammering on about his "shattered world." Do they actually expect people to swallow this crap? And isn't it too little too late?
ReplyDeleteNext up (probably next week): "Tom Finds LOVE Again!" "Tom's Broken Heart Healed By New Love!" "Tom's SEXAY New Love Is Now Sporting A Baby Bump! From His Sperm! Because He's TOTALLY Heterosexual!"
I agree with Gabi, mostly because it's been used for so long across multiple sites so (almost) everyone knows what it means.
ReplyDeleteNot that the other suggestions aren't hilarious :)
okay when are we voting? Im going to vote now cause it's 9:30 here. I like MiscAvenger and L. Tom Hubbard, but they are all great!
ReplyDeleteSingle dad? Please.
ReplyDeleteI quite like "Tom Thumb"
ReplyDeleteAnd Sandy, the last headline is my favourite.
@11:10EST
ReplyDeletePlease add or subtract :
L. Ron Cruise(LRC)
McGlib (McG)
Tom Thumb (TT)
Tom Thumbelina (TTE)
Tom "Undermy" Thumb (TUT)
Cruise Control (CC).
Xenuphobe (Xp)
XenuProbe (XP)
MiscAvenger (MA)
Church Lady (CL)
L. Tom Hubbard (LTH)
The Midget Behind the Curtain ...
RonTomTom (RTT)
The Sauce ( fingersnap $)...
I like McGlib (McG) the best, because it rolls off the tongue easily. The only problem is that isn't there a producer by the name of McG?
ReplyDeleteUpdate , what do you think?
ReplyDeleteL. Ron Cruise(LRC)
L.Tom Hubbard (LTH)
McGlib (McG)
MiscAvenger (MA)
Church Lady (CL)
@Agent
ReplyDeleteI know some people giggled at Church Lady, but I think the whole point of renaming him was so posters didn't refer to him as Tammy Girl. It rubbed some people the wrong way (like either being a girl was bad, or that it comes across as homophobic) . Just my 2 sheckles :)
And Agent - I'm still dying at the timing of my first response to Vicki, that wound up posting right after yours. I almost peed myself with the gaffe!
This pic of Tom looks just like Suri. I never thought that until this picture.
ReplyDeletePlease tell me I'm not the only one thinking there was an entertainment source called Kneepads. I honestly thought it was some website that Jack Osbourne gave an interview to when he announced his MS diagnosis.
ReplyDeleteThis very compelling German film, "Until Nothing Remains" (2010), about one family's experience with Co$ may interest those here.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0HlG2zZ-B2E