Another Dating Profile
I hope everyone just keeps sending in the responses and profiles you run across as you hit the dating sites of the world. I love them all.
I am charlie 34 im looking for love someone to meet and get to know more, in orange county lets talk and lets have fun talking and getting to know each other. :) thanks, ANOTHER THING I LIVE AT HOME SO WHAT IF I DO OR NOT ITS THE PERSON THAT COUNTS, RIDE A BICYCLE TAKE THE BUS DO U LADIES GET WHAT I MEAN HAHAHA i mean by that I NEVER GOT MY LICENSE :) hell if that is a thing that does not get me and u to like each other then ladies then there got to be soemthing wrong with u in the head come on im a great guy look past those things and like me for me and , I work at a super market and What I'm In Search Of... To have fun and make a new friends , someone to hang with, go out and go have fun, make friends no smokers thanks. OK LADIES I KNOW IM NOT THE PERFECT GUY OR HAS A GREAT LIFE BUT HAVE U EVER HEARD OF TALKING TO ME AND SEE IM FAR MORE THEN WHA T U READ OF ME ALL I ASK IS A CHANCE :) AND ANOTHER THING I REALLY DO NOT DRIVE OR GOT MY LICENSE SO IF U R INTERESTED IN ME U HAVE TO COME SEE ME IF NOT NO WORRIES :)
o_O
ReplyDeleteMaybe he is "slow"
ReplyDeleteSo I take it he doesn't have a license.
ReplyDeleteHe vacillates between being so very sure of himself and worried. Oh, yes please, let's DATE!
ReplyDeleteHa ha @Vicki!!!
ReplyDeleteThere's a perfect match for everyone, right?? Maybe they need to single out the weirdo dating profiles and try to match those crazy kids up with each other. Hopefully there is mass transit available
@EmEyeKay
ReplyDeleteGreat comment! I think he had a couple of beers before he started writing it, then sobered up toward the end.
The roads aren't safe with Bieber on them. I don't mind waiting in the heat for a bus for the man of my dreams. He seems like someone I'd like to know more about. Group date anyone?
ReplyDeleteand some people wonder why they are alone? Personally, it was the yelling I found a bit much.. WE GOT IT YOU LIVE WITH YOUR MOMS, BAG GROCERIES AND TAKE A BUS BECAUSE YOU WERE TOO LAZY TO TAKE A DRIVERS TEST. WE GOT IT!
ReplyDelete@ Sunny.
ReplyDeleteWell, at least you know he wasn't drinking and driving. I'm not sure, but I don't think he has a license.
@G
ReplyDeleteHa! Thanks for the laugh!! I'm having a rough week and this site is killing me this morning (in a good way!!)
HA @G!
ReplyDeleteWhat a prize!
ReplyDeleteI'm almost certain he's also got a pet rat named Algernon.
ReplyDeleteMy money is on he has no edumacation either.
ReplyDeleteHe's a HS graduate according to his profile. Yes, this guy contacted me. Ugh!
ReplyDeleteThe biggest turn off here is the caps lock. Dude, I don't even know you, WHY ARE YOU YELLING AT ME??
ReplyDeleteThe lack of a driver's license, job, and living with parents are definitely not attractive to me, but I have to at least somewhat defend the awful spelling & grammar. I met my guy online, and he had TERRIBLE spelling on his profile...I gave him a chance (because I was desperate after no results) and he turned out to be an awesome guy with dyslexia. He maintains that he put his profile through spell check, despite how horrid it was.
ReplyDeleteThe special bus got him around for 20 years (I'm assuming that's the age he got out of high school), so why spend all that time and effort to get a license?
ReplyDeleteWhen he stated What I'm In Search Of - it made me think of that Leonard Nimoy series. This guy could have been a study of Leonard's in one of those episodes. To me, he'd be just as fasinating as Bigfoot or aliens.
It's a romance scammer from another country. They don't have a good grasp of English, usually, and write sentences that are poorly put together with no punctuation.
ReplyDeleteWell then....in my head, he owns a grocery store chain and has a limo driver. He's just talking himself down because he's trying to weed out the gold diggers. And he lives at home because Duh, where else is he gonna live? At the market? I don't think so.
ReplyDeleteAside from a license and a place of his own, you know what else this guy is missing? Punctuation.
ReplyDelete@BlueDahlia, what is a romance scammer? I have never heard of this before.
ReplyDelete@Bluedahlia77 I'm with you on this one. My mother inlaw had this happen to her and after talking for awhile he claimed he wanted to come meet her but couldn't afford plane tix and so forth. And what do you think happened after she sent money overseas? Dumbass.
ReplyDeleteOn another note, she did meet her now husband on a site and he is awesome.
G, you cracked me up!
ReplyDeleteSunny, I hope your week turns around - Saturday and Sunday might pull it out for you? Hugs to you, girlie. There's always next week :-).
Janelle, it's the lack of punctuation and caps lock that are bugging the crap outta me. You got lucky and I'm glad your dude is great.
ReplyDeleteI don't think this is a romance scammer. His English isn't broken enough to be ESL.
Oh it still totally bugs me when my Dude emails me, I'm shallow like that!
Delete@Frufa
ReplyDeleteThanks! It's all stuff that will turn around - I just have to ride it out a little longer. Enjoy your weekend xo
Oh God. As someone about to be another fish in this sea of singles...I am truly terrified of what's out there. I might just stay single and make my kids take care of my old ass when the time comes. O.o
ReplyDeleteI think Charlie got a slow start in life, he feels invisible. Unlike a lot of cute, with it, dudes he at least is completely upfront with what might be seen as dating drawbacks, no car, lives at home, doesn't make a ton of money. I don't think he was drunk, I think he was scared and finally got up the courage to try the dating scene.
ReplyDeleteCharlie needs a friend. He is also goodhearted, *come see me if not no worries* with a smiley face!
The right girl could do much, much worse.
Hope you feel better Sunny!
ReplyDeleteNot............saying................it..........................
ReplyDeleteGo for it green wave girl, he done has a HS diploma!
ReplyDeleteNot that I online date but just in my personal and business lives, people who don't bother to spell or compose properly are automatically eliminated. Also, confidence is the biggest seller in any aspect of life (not to be confused with arrogance.). I wish people of all shapes, sizes, and walks of life would learn this one simple thing instead of wallowing in their own self pity.
ReplyDelete@FSP
ReplyDeleteThank you Sir!! It's already turning around :)
I should hook him up with my neighbor who has got to be pushing 30 now, who also lives at home with her parents, is employed though, is a virgin (she likes it when I share that tidbit) and also never got her driver's license.
ReplyDeleteIt's the fact that he says something is wrong in the head with girls who won't accept him that's part of the problem. I'm 37 (in a few days) and I'm not looking for someone who lives at home (with no goal of moving out), no driver's license (not even just no car, but no license), and no punctuation! And whoever he goes out with has to come to him. No, thanks.
ReplyDeleteIn his defense, the "What I'm searching for" comes from the website. :)
I'm not saying he's bipolar.....I'm just saying that he appears to have an extreme case of the Gemini's.
ReplyDelete@Squeezebox - I almost fell out of my chair at your comment. LOL
This is awesome! I've been looking for someone that I can support!
ReplyDeleteI'm with BlueDahlia! I bet this guy really lives in Nigeria and will ask for money. I got contacted by a guy like this on meetup. He said he was an American, but his punctuation and language usage did not match. It took me a moment to figure out he lives in Orange County. That must be HORRID with no car in Southern Cal.
ReplyDeleteI don't mind the living with parents thing. I had my mother live with me for years, and she still does. That's an American thing to move out when you're of a certain age.
All of his dating problems would be solved by moving to New York City. There, everyone talks about fresh produce and cooking, and nobody drives.
ReplyDeleteomg soooo fckn stooopid lol
ReplyDeleteI'm going to guess epilepsy.
ReplyDeleteIs it sad that I know someone who might be perfect for him? One of my facebook "friends" - she types "lol" after everything. For example, "My house got robbed, they took everything lol."
ReplyDelete@Anna
ReplyDeleteYep, and straight men are at a minimum in NYC.
Ok, OMAMA and Kloie, time to make a love connection. We don't need Chuck Woolery, just you girls. There is someone for everyone, and I just love love!
ReplyDeleteBrenda, you may be onto something with the epilepsy guess. Would explain a lot. Hope he finds his special someone!
Just to point it out: "dyslexia" is an anagram for "sex daily," and "CAPS LOCK" is an anagram for "COCK SLAP."
ReplyDelete@Robert HAHA
ReplyDeleteAs someone living at home with her parents with two kids, no job and no driver's license (it's been revoked, thrice), I feel his pain. However, during courtship, one should always present oneself on the most positive light possible. Ain't no excuse for poor grammar/punctuation. And as some of you have already said, stop yelling!
Y'all are killing me. Hmmmmm....I wonder if he gets a discount on groceries. Make it "worth my while."
ReplyDeleteI could've overlooked the text-speak, the caps and lack of punctuation. I could've overlooked the living at home, working at a supermarket and not being able to drive. But guys who denigrate women, calling them shallow, gold diggers, or that there's 'soemthing wrong with you in the head' for not lining up to date their unadventurous, basement-dwelling, unemployed asses are a huge turn off. Because it seems some men believe women - no matter what their station in life, no matter how educated or independent are supposed to find any man, even the sorriest loser, a prize.
ReplyDelete@MadLyb
ReplyDeleteI hear ya! I actually have met a few guys like that: "I have penis, so you should bow down to me!"
I'm sure this gem has been laughed at quite a bit in his life and taking it out on the innocent.
Amen Mad Lyb.
ReplyDeletemy mother is epileptic. he probably wouldn't ride a bicycle if his seizures were that bad. If it's an illness, why bring up the license at all or better yet, just say why you don't drive. I don't think that's it.
@kloie - my friend always types lolol. What does that mean? You laughed out loud twice? Or you just really want to emphasize that it was actually audible?
ReplyDeleteThis post (especially the all caps and the lack of punctuation) reminded me of two people I know: One from The Netherlands, and one who had a benign brain tumor removed. If he hadn't been located in Orange County and had included superfluous vowels I would have been convinced that it was Christiaan.
I think this guy is probably on the slow side. I used to work with a guy who was very similar. Mid-late 30's, lived with his widowed mother, and would have done anything to meet a woman. He joined every dating service and answered ads in the personals. He was the messenger for our office and would go to other offices and ask out the secretaries.
ReplyDeleteI felt so sorry for him. He obviously had learning disabilities and no one directed him in the path of other people like him. I think his mother wanted to keep him at home for the company.
@Henriette
ReplyDeleteLack of Straight men in NYC? Shirley, you jest ...
He reminds me of the characters in 10 Items or Less (the TV show, not the movie [which I never saw]). Nice guys, not the brightest, not going anywhere, but not a bad catch necessarily, if you consider that they work hard, don't give up on something because it's unfulfilling from time to time, and are going to treasure you like you are the best thing that's ever happened to them, because you probably are.
ReplyDeleteNot sure if any of you all have seen the commercials, but down south they've been promoting a dating website called "farmersonly.com" The commercial *literally* says it's for, "farmers, ranchers, and just good ol' country folk." The commercials shows this drop dead gorgeous blond, walking through a wheat field, with this lonely, perplexed look on her face. Also, there are parts of the commercial where cows and pigs are talking to each other (voice over) about how their owners need to find love. OMG, I just have to visit that site, just to see what it's about. I wonder if any of the profiles would be CDAN worthy...
ReplyDelete@lutefisk
ReplyDeleteThat's so sad. There use to be a guy who worked at this restaurant like that. He would talk to ANY woman and ask her out.
On the flip side, I knew this older lady when I was single who went to every singles' event out there with no luck. She was extremely intelligent, but not catching on with the guys.
Stories like that always break my heart.
@cornbread
That dating site sounds scary.
@G
ReplyDeleteNope and I leave in the SF Bay Area! I was shocked by how hard up the women in NYC are. They move to the sticks to find men. If I was a straight guy, that's where I would be; simple supply and demand.
Henriette, it was very sad. Every time my sister or one of my friends came to visit me he would ask if I could set him up with them. I always thought if someone pointed him in the right direction he could meet a girl like him, but it wasn't my place.
ReplyDeleteAt one of my local supermarkets there is a nice looking guy probably in his late 20's -early 30's who has been stocking the frozen food aisle for years. I never had any contact with him until about a year ago when he started to talk to me about how he bought a lottery ticket and was hoping he won. The minute he opened his mouth I realized he had some type of disability. You would never have known. Would I judge him if he joined an online dating service? I have no idea if he lives at home, but he is basically a stock boy in a supermarket. I can't judge people writing these dating profiles without knowing all of the facts.
I met my husband thru Match.com. When he responded to my ad his response was not that great. He had some misspells and his sentence was not that great. Anyway, he turned out to be a decent guy. We have been married for 7 years now.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteSeems like a happy fellow. Just wondering if he has a driver's license...
ReplyDelete