Rock Of Ages & That's My Boy Bomb
Anyone who didn't think That's My Boy was not going to bomb obviously never watched one of the commercials for it. I think Andy Samberg really needs to think about that whole leaving SNL thing. Yes, he has a BBC show he will be in and Grown Ups 2 will do fine, but this is not the way you want to start. The Adam Sandler movie finished 5th and was the worst opening for any Adam Sandler movie that was made by Happy Madison.
As for Tom Cruise? Rock Of Ages barely finished ahead of That's My Boy with Rock of Ages and is the worst opening for Tom Cruise since 2007.
Good, maybe Tommy boy will disappear for a while. Probably not though, cause his ego won't allow it.
ReplyDeleteOk, so who will admit to seeing Rock of Ages? Because I want to know if it's campy or if they play it straight ( resist the urge to make straight jokes). I asked a friend who's seen it, and she claims they played it straight - however, I have absolutely no faith in her judgement. She barely has a sense of humor.
ReplyDeleteI'll skip Rock of Ages. I'm waiting for a Go-Go's biopic or something with Violent Femmes & Cure songs as the soundtrack. There were several different music scenes in the 80s. The one in Rock of Ages was just the most embarrassing one.
ReplyDeleteLove violent femmes...
DeleteMy 15 yo daughter saw it this weekend. She said it was like watching Glee-The Movie.
ReplyDeleteOh Tammy, please go away and take the side smirker with you.
Adam Sandler needs to learn how to act and stop playing the same character over and over again.
ReplyDeleteOh Tommy, I think we all knew that overkill of Tommy is a rock god promotion was gonna fall flat.
Where are all the ticket buying Scientologists when you need one?
Where is the blind item reveal? Didnt enty say one was going to be revealed?
ReplyDeleteIs it evil of me to get the warm fuzzies because a Tom Cruise flick bombed?
ReplyDeletePlease, someone here must give a review of Tommy Girl's "performance". How many songs does he "sing"? Does he butcher them? I need to be more prepared before I go see it. And, as I mentioned in a comment the other day, medicated as well. I really think I may hurt myself from the laughter that will come from deep within me. Cause that happens just watching the previews.
ReplyDelete@lazyday - word. The hair band scene was a joke in my neck of the woods. I 'll only give a pass to GNR because they were pretty groundbreaking with their sound.
ReplyDeleteYes, medicated indeed. Something like a couple margaritas or mojitos. 6-pack isn't going to do it for this one.
ReplyDeleteJust the preview of him prancing around shirtless for a few seconds pretending to sing dead or alive is enough to keep me away from that movie until VH1 Classic shows it at 11 pm someday.
ReplyDeleteI'm surprised at Rock of Ages since they've put such a huge amount of money into advertising and promotion. The stars have been everywhere in the press the past couple of weeks.
ReplyDeleteI had a chance to see the play (I won tickets) when it came to Seattle. The play was good. Very fun. I don't understand the "trend/need" to make plays into movies. Don't get it. Anywho, When I saw that CouchJumper was playing the lead for the movie-I said no thanks. I do wonder if they changed the ending to be a "sweet wrap up" with his character.
ReplyDeleteAdam Sandler was funny 10 or more years ago. At least according to my husband. You can only do the same facial expressions and adolescent humor for so long. I think he keeps doing these movies so he can mack on supermodels or actresses way out of his league
ReplyDeleteWho the Hell thought that putting Tommy in high heels and a wig was a valid business idea?
ReplyDeleteGlad Rock Of Ages bombed, I can't stand Tom Cruise he's such a bully.
ReplyDeleteI really want to see Rock of Ages b/c I pretty much watch all musicals/music related films since that's how I started but I can't say that Tommy Girl isn't a real turn off. Adam Sandler, really nice guy but he has to grow up already and do a higher quality comedy and not the same old theme and character he always does when he's a producer.
ReplyDeleteAgain, it's sad when a movie finishes in 5th place and is considered a failure. It's like nothing is acceptable anymore except 200 million dollar opening weekends and 1st place for 5 weeks. If a movie makes less than it cost to make, at the end of its run, THEN it should be considered a failure.
ReplyDeleteRock of Ages lost me at Tom Cruise. I was a Theatre minor in college, so normally, I might have gone.
ReplyDeleteHe and the rest of his cult members are clearly loony tunes.
Adam Sandler needs to stop it already with the whole 11 year old boy in a man's body schtick, already. Tom Hanks did it SO much better in Big-and without any fart jokes or Hooters waitresses!
You are so right! Big was one of the best movies ever. Instant classic.
DeleteAgree I just watched Big the other night, that movie is still awesome
DeleteWow, apparently I was so worked up, I couldn't proofread!
ReplyDeleteSpeaking of this movie, I caught Catherine Zeta Jones on the Today show with Matt Lauer. He mentioned that this was a movie for "her generation." IF she was born in 1969, she was a senior in high school at the time. She looked like a dear caught in headlights! Who knew such an innocent question would freak her out? She tried to sidestep the question by saying she was "working all the time" and some BS about Bono. I think she really is a decade older than me.
ReplyDeleteI think that I had posted a month or so ago that the "Boy" movie smelled rotten through the TV screen. I also questioned Adam Sandler's talent. I don't find him enjoyable in the least. He's got that same stupid "Chanukah" voice when he says things that are supposedly "funny".
ReplyDeleteNo other movies have bombed historically as much as musicals. It takes a special chemistry, story, etc. I think that it's sad the way that TC has thrown his career away with his " You're glib Matt, I know more than you. " and the whole church of $cientology association. What the hell is that? "We are special beings from outer space" Yes aaand? His personality and looks were charming, happy, well meaning and good to his fans before the couch jumping and glib rant, attacking depressed people for using meds? That just seems nasty and judgmental. That's what publicists are for, to preserve the brand, the image, the lie if need be. His personality and cult association has destroyed his once lucrative career. once the mask has slipped to reveal the real character it's hard to believe that mask again.
ReplyDeleteAnyone who wants to read reviews from the professional movie critics, go here:
ReplyDeletehttp://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/rock_of_ages_2012/
Ecua said, "Rock of Ages lost me at Tom Cruise." <-This exactly. I thought his character is supposed to be sexy, but I am left feeling uncomfortable whenever I see him in the previews. It's like he is a little kid who got into his sister's makeup or something.
ReplyDeleteMaybe I'm not being fair. I don't really like musicals to begin with, but I do get into the whole hair metal nostalgia thing. Tom Cruise is just a joke now and this movie was a bad fit from the start.
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ReplyDeleteI saw Rock of Ages. Without having seen the musical, I thought Stacee Jaxx (Tom Cruise's character) was supposed to be wild/crazy rocker along the lines of Bret Michaels or David Lee Roth. I could not have BEEN more wrong. If you think back to that crazy interview Tom did with Matt Lauer where he called him a "glib," that is EXACTLY how he played Stacee- with that weird sort of crazed intensity. It made me so uncomfortable to watch. It wasn't just Tom Cruise who gave a crappy performance. Alec Baldwin was completely wooden (and his bad wig was super distracting), Russel Brand was pretty nonsensical and I didn't really understand his role, Catherine Zeta Jones was waaaay too over-the-top and Julianne Hough cannot act her way out of a paper bag, plain and simple. The singing was really subpar and some of the arrangements of classic songs just did not gel well. I didn't find a lot of the punchlines very funny and I also felt the PG-13 rating was inappropriate- there were a lot of boob grabs and sex scenes. Okay, end of rant... can you tell I didn't really like it?
ReplyDeleteAt least Tom got good reviews, can't say the same for Sandler. Maybe Tom should say no to supporting roles. Just sad it probably force him to stick to action movies, because they always make bank overseas. He is good actor and should do more quality projects. Why do they keep casting Julianne Hough?
ReplyDeleteTom Cruise isn't the lead in ROCK OF AGES and the reviews are awful except for Cruise(it seems he's awesome in his final scene )
ReplyDeleteI have seen the stage play and saw the movie with my husband three nights ago. The stage show is so much better. They turned the movie into a Disney version of the play, which was really disappointing. I think the problem was the direction. If they had been true to the stage show it would have been great. Tom Cruise can sing, I thought his singing was better than the leads. I am an atheist - not a scientologist.
ReplyDeleteI sacrificed myself for the benefit of all my CDANers. Me and the BF went last night, and couldn't stop laughing at how bad it was. When a movie plays like a ripoff of coyote ugly crossed with Showgirls, you know you're in for a bad movie.
ReplyDeleteThe movie was played over the top, but the campiness came from the very bad acting and trite, predictible plot. Tom Cruise was probably better than most (surprisingly), but he was horribly miscast. Julianne Hough is a perky Nomi Malone, and Alec Baldwin was horrible. There was zero chemistry between him and Russell Brand, making their scenes painful to watch. Russell Brand should have played Stacie Jaxx, not the club sidekick role. CZJ seemed to be intentionally playing her role as wooden, which is a waste -- she actually has singing and dancing talent. I never saw the musical, but I am guessing they modified Stacie Jaxx's plot line because it all had a happy ending. Mary j Bliges character seems so out of place here -- not sure why they even bothered with the whole strip club storyline, except that it was a producers excuse to do real life "research". Though it did lead to one of the stupidest lines -- "the only way to gain respect is there (pointing to the stripper pole)". Which indicates how sexist and blindly exploitive the whole movie feels. The line is intended to be serious -- you just know that the director 100% believed that that line had deep life meaning, along with this crappy trite movie. Stay far, far away. Then wait for it to come out on Netflix. Get stoned and watch it for the laughs.
Thank you, Seachica. I really wanted a CDANer's perspective, because we all kind of speak the same language around here.
ReplyDeleteI read that the director considered TC's "audition" for the role to be his part in Tropic Thunder, which I actually thought was great, and quite chancy for someone who makes his living playing the same part over and over (the best pilot ever, the best racecar driver ever, the best super spy ever, ad nauseum).
Thanks for being a team player, Seachica :-).
Here at CDAN the only way to gain respect is here (pointing at the keyboard)!!!
ReplyDeleteLol, Sadie!
DeleteWe may never know how old Catherine Zita Jones is, didn't Michael Douglas only find out when they were invited to the White House ? That was my all time blind reveal....
ReplyDeleteIt just seemed destined to fail. Cheers to FS comment on the broadcast future of this on VH1 Classic. Preferably after Ratt's Behind The Music 'sode.
ReplyDelete@Seachica - thanks for taking one for the team.
ReplyDelete@ feraltart- your last line was priceless !
Good. I'm glad Rock of Ages bombed too. I hate Tom Cruise. I'm glad all the marketing to try and make him sexy again failed as well. I couldn't take it anymore. If I heard one more story about his pubes....
ReplyDeleteI do hope Adam Sandler reinvents himself or something. I really like the guy, but his act is getting old. :(
Great review seachica! I was debating going to see it ("ironically" of course), but now I will wait to do that in the comfort of my couch and pj's...and lazyday I would be first in line for that movie!
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ReplyDeleteAll of Sandler's movies are LCD. I sometimes wonder if he wants to do better (or at least more serious) stuff ("Punch Drunk Love"....the one about 9/11 where he looked like Bob Dylan...."Funny People"), but his fans reject it - so he always has to keep going to the "fart jokes" well.
ReplyDeleteANYWAY, I'm so glad his turds are finally starting to bomb. They're all really bad (this one, "Jack & Jill," "Grown Ups," "Zohan," "Go With It," "Chuck & Larry," etc...). But usually they make good $$, which makes me think we're inching toward "Idiocracy." It's nice to see these turds bomb. That is all.
Love Idiocracy!
DeleteI saw Rock of Ages today - matinee, I wasn't willing to fork over a full $11 to see it. I wasn't expecting much as I loathe Tommy Boy and while I like Julianne Hough, she can't act. She can't even sing really well except when she's singing with someone else.
ReplyDeleteThat said, I thought it was OK. Tom was definitely miscast. I agree with whoever said Russell Brand would've been better in the part. I love both Alec Baldwin and Russell Brand but they both fell flat here. Paul Giamatti as Jaxx's manager was good, slimy and smarmy as any good rock manager would be. There were some honestly funny moments, some really really uncomfortable moments, the monkey (or whatever he was) didn't need to be there.
Mary J. Blige sang great but I still don't understand why she was there. She was the best singer in the bunch though.
I only paid $6 to see this and it was worth it - but barely. If you like the music of the late 80's (and some Journey) then wait for the DVD. It says Tommy sang his own songs but for some reason I doubt it.
Great review, Seachica. I haven't seen the stage show, but I honestly thought about seeing the movie. I had to go to Burlesque and Mamma Mia by myself because there isn't a single person in my group who would have ever seen either one. I was busy this weekend or else I might have wasted my time.
ReplyDeleteAs far as Adam, I can't even stand to see the previews of his dumbass movie. Why in the hell does he keep talking like a little kid? That shit is not funny. As the Mum would say "TALK RIGHT!"
I'm still upset about Tammy being cast as Lestat.
ReplyDeleteI wish Adam Sandler would make a good movie, I seem to recall liking him a long long time ago. I had to see Jack & Jill with my kid and it was sooo bad, it was like he didn't watch it or have script approval or something.
ReplyDeleteThere are many problems with Rock of Ages, apparently, but I think the #1 problem is Tom Cruise as Stacee. People are NEVER going to buy Tom Cruise as some hedonistic rock god. Never. It's ridiculous. I won't go see it for many reasons (including the fact that I can't stand CZJ), but that's the #1 reason why.
ReplyDeleteHonestly, I enjoy some of Sandler's dumber movies much more than his serious ones. I hated Punch Drunk Love, Reign Over Me, and Just Go With It. But I laughed myself silly at Zohan and The Waterboy. I also really liked 50 First Dates and The Wedding Singer.
like the poet lingering at the side of a fatal car crash, I can't wait to watch Rock of Ages
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