Oh, what a tangled website we weave, when at first we practice to deceive. That's what one of those crusty writer guys said, right?
OK, maybe not exactly, but conniving, breasty Harriet Talons sure had that in mind when she backstabbed so many people on her current hit show, her own network's New York website is currently weighing whether or not to write a scathing exposé on Harriet's behind-the-scenes shenanigans—they're that damn impressive.
Back in Hollywood, but equally as stealth—and to far more sexy results—would be an Oscar-nominated star's party behavior. Want to hear what Freddie Friction picked up along with his cocktail?
A date!
And it's weird on so many levels: Just like Harriet, who tells the world constantly (mostly in women's magazines) how down-to-earth and shy and humble she is, Jeremy's been busy spinning a similar ersatz media presence. For instance, he often talks about how "straight" he is. Like, a lot.
Isn't it fascinating how very unlike Crescent Cumquat and Topher Hairy-Tuchus—who often depend on extravagant online shenanigans to hook up with guys they fancy—Freddie is. He just asked a guy home at a recent N.Y. party! Right in front of everybody!
And even though the party dude who Freddie asked back to his place was completely shocked, he did manage to say yes, in case you were wondering.
Yeah, maybe it was kinda stupid for Freddie (who we hear is a tad on the old-fashioned side) to let this all go down in the open, but hey, makes more sense than Craigslist, huh? Less of a trail…
I think Freddie's gonna be a crafty one, just like Harriet. In fact, I'm sure of it!
AND IT AIN'T: Felicity Huffman and Chord Overstreet, Joan Rivers and Zac Efron, Betty White and Robert Pattinson
Zooey D and Tommy C.
ReplyDeleteJust because I can't stand either of them.
Scratch that.
ReplyDeleteZooey D and Jeremy Renner. Why did he use the name Jeremy instead of Freddie?
Is Jeremy Freddie's date, or did Ted fuck up?
ReplyDeleteDefinitely Jeremy Renner for the guy...I would have guessed that without the typo :) He always seems to be trying too hard to convince everyone he's straight.
ReplyDeleteOooh.. I bet Ted made a mistake.. Freddie is Jeremy Renner. It's still up on the E! website (as of 12:30 EST)
ReplyDeleteTotally used the Jeremy by mistake....
ReplyDeleteWOW, big slip Ted. I cosign the Jeremy Renner guess.
ReplyDeleteZooey D's not really breasty is she? I think it has to be someone on Fox though, "her own network's NY website" has to be a reference to the NY Post which is also owned by Murdoch. Maybe Emily D from Bones? She's "breastier" than her sis.
Is Zooey supposed to be a backstabber? I have felt a little bad because she really, really annoys me, but if she is not a nice person, then I won't feel bad at all!
ReplyDeleteNo idea who the guy is.....
Harriet Talons: Lea Michele
ReplyDeleteAnd whoa! I think Ted mistakenly mentioned Freddie's real name - Jeremy. Renner perhaps?
Zooey annoys me greatly too, but I don't think of her as breasty either.
ReplyDeleteZooey D isn't very breasty. What about Kat Dennings from 2 Broke Girls?
ReplyDeleteIs AMC's website NY-based?
ReplyDelete"Breasty" could apply to Christina Hendricks.
I think we have to consider who the ain'ts are for Harriet.
ReplyDeleteThey are all blonde.
They are all over 40.
The Joan Rivers ain't is a good indication that it is Fox, given that there was bad blood over her failed talk show.
On board with the Renner guess. That's a fairly big booboo on Ted's part.
People on E-Online are saying it's Terri Hatcher.
ReplyDeleteI thought Renner already had a BV name?
ReplyDeleteParson me. Lea Michele is already more or less established as Harriet Talons.
ReplyDeletePardon...
ReplyDeleteI think Ted's "typo" was done on purpose but to look like a typo. I have nothing to back this thought with, it just seems like there should be enough editing precautions in place to keep that from publishing.
ReplyDeleteI have no guesses, just wanted to say I love Zoey D. Why does she annoy everyone? I think she's adorable. And that VOICE! I would never stop singing if I had her voice.
What network would actually diss one of its stars? I would go with Lea Michele on that one.
ReplyDeleteI also find Zooey annoying. Especially that stupid commercial. "Is that rain?" Cripes, you need a phone to tell you that because you're too damn lazy to turn your head and look out the window?!?
Wasn't Teri Hatcher "They're Real, and They're Spectacular" on Seinfeld?
ReplyDeleteJust a thought. Have no real info.
Yup!
Deletebut lea michele also isn't "breasty." seems like a strange adj to use for her. though i've heard she's the top suspect for harriet talons. here's a list of ppl ted has eliminated:
ReplyDeleteUpdate: As of 4/27/12, Ted has eliminated: Ellen Pompeo, Emily VanCamp, Jessica Lange, January Jones, Christina Hendricks, Anna Paquin, Candice Accola, Juliana Marguiles, Madeline Stowe, Naya Rivera, Eva Longoria, Kristin Bauer, Elisabeth Moss, anyone from Pretty Little Liars, Mindy Kaling, Katherine Heigl, Jane Lynch, Nina Dobrev, Jennifer Morrison
Whoopsie, Ted!
ReplyDeleteHa! First Himmmm returns yesterday, and then today Ted C. goes and slips up, giving away his own blind! This is the best week yet for blind items, imho. Anyway I agree, I don't understand why Lea Michele is top suspect for Hariet Talons. Ted has said HT has won a golden globe, etc. Plus he always makes a big deal out of her bosom, and all the AIA's are older, blonder women. I think think is someone older too. The only thing that makes me think it's not Hatcher is that her show is ending, and the other HT blinds say it's a hit show where HT is a primary. I wanna say Sophia Vergara, but I don't think she won a Golden Globe. This is a hard one!
ReplyDeleteBtw - Foxnews.com is a NY-based website. It could be a Fox show.
Felicity Huffman could be a clue about her network and Joan Rivers could be a clue because of plastic surgery.
ReplyDeletePersonally, I think JR is Bi, rather than gay, but I thought Enty had a policy of not outing people? Despite the fact that Ted C clearly posted that "typo" why would Enty post it like that without editing that out?
ReplyDeleteWeird.
Glad to see I'm not the only person to find Zooey D totally unlikeable. The whole MPDG hipster persona reeks of a disingenuous put-on.
ReplyDeleteThis is def NOT Lea Michelle. She hasn't won a GG and she has no boobs to speak of. Plus, Ted said whoever it was ran in different circles then Naya Rivera.
ReplyDeleteI LOVE Zooey. She is a sweet person, not her either.
I agree it's an older blonde actress.
It's been changed on the site. Guess it was Jeremy Renner. Meh. I'll still girlfap to him. His arms in The Avengers make me crazy.
ReplyDeleteIn my little universe Harriet Talons is Terri Hatcher....
ReplyDeleteSomeone over on the E boards just made a good point. Assuming he didn't mean to make that slip (which I doubt) why would he make the "and it ain't" people like Chord Overstreet, Zac Efron and Robert Pattinson?
ReplyDeleteThe BI says Oscar nominated actor and none of these guys have ever been nominated. That just seems dumb.
I am laughing at the AIA's for Harriet. First we get a Desperate Housewife, next we get two quite OLD women which would totally piss off Terri Hatcher. She's supposed to be terribly sensitive about her aging isn't she? Ted cracks me up.
ReplyDeletehere are some actresses who have won golden globes for TV work and are still acting on tv (and have not been eliminated by ted):
ReplyDeleteclaire danes
edie falco
kathy baker
sela ward
mariska hargitay
kyra sedgwick
glenn close
katey segal
Harriet Talons has been driving me nuts for weeks now. I had thought Lea Michelle, but I think this BI is pointing us AWAY from Lea. For one thing it says HT "tells the world constantly (mostly in women's magazines) how down-to-earth and shy and humble she is." Teri has done interviews with women's mags like Good Housekeeping and Ladies' Home Journal; I don't think Lea would be featured in those types of publications. The AIAs are older women. And Teri Hatcher has won a Golden Globe.
ReplyDeleteLandy, maybe they're all connected in some other way.
ReplyDeleteMs. Scarlett, in the ball room, with the candlestick!
ReplyDeleteTed said that Harriet was on a NETWORK drama, not cable, which eliminates quite a few actresses, including Claire Danes, Edie Falco, Glenn Close and Kyra Sedgwick.
ReplyDeleteoh and meant to add this could def also be teri h. she's won a gg, is older, and i could see calling her "breasty" - she always has those boobs on parade.
ReplyDeletealso harriet talons - H.T. --> T.H. --> teri hatcher!
I always thought Michelle Trachtenberg could be Harriet. She's THE gossip girl on GG, so hard to write her off, she won a golden globe, she's supposedly awful...but definitely younger than the actresses he named today, if that is a clue. Terri hatcher is also supposed to be awful, but since DH is ending, it doesn't seem like people would be concerned about her being written off.
ReplyDeleteI think this is the first time I've seen Ted f*&k up one of his BVs like that - thanks TC!
ReplyDeleteJeremy obviously, though that BI isn't particularly shocking. But does Renner really go on and on about how straight he is? I thought he was a don't ask don't tell guy.
ReplyDeleteHarriet HAS to be Teri Hatcher. Stuff is starting to come out now that DH is over and no one has to pretend they like her anymore.
Enty's post from Wednesday "Everyone Hates Teri Hatcher" matches perfectly with this blind. It's Teri.
ReplyDelete@Basil--No he doesn't go on and on about it. He finally said the rumors were not true in the recent HR interview, but other than that, he's never actually addressed it. As you said, he just ignores it. I guess it works better or sounds juicier for the BV to frame it that way, but you're right. He's not constantly talking about how he's straight.
ReplyDeleteHarriet Talons, HATCHER, TERI
ReplyDeleteHT TH
Holy shit, I just figured out the connection. I know I'm slow on the uptake, but Chord Overstreet, Zac Efron, Robert Pattinson, and Jeremy Renner all sing.
ReplyDeleteIf you watch interviews with Jeremy Renner, he references "chicks" and "girls" a lot. It sometimes sounds forced, as if he's trying too hard. He did an interview with Out magazine where he said he was straight but that he didn't date because he was more focused on his career. I don't care either way...I still think he's hot and will continue to crush on him even if I'm not his type :)
ReplyDelete@Vicki--Nice work on that one, but I still have to wonder why he would make such a small, almost non-existent connection when the more obvious non-connection is that the BV person is an oscar nominee and the other three are not?
ReplyDeleteThen again this is Ted C we are talking about. Someone who always has to speak in the most unnecessarily confusing way possible, so I'm not gonna put too much thought into that. Lol! Way to go on the connection though. *thumbs up*
How about Kate Walsh from Private Practice for Harriet??
ReplyDelete@Kelley--He's totally hot and my favorite actor. I actually didn;t think he was that good looking initially, but found him more attractive because of how awesome an actor he is. Lol But yeah, no reason you can't crush on him anyway. I still say he's bi, rather than gay, because I have seen him with women quite a bit, but either way who gives a shit? He's awesome no matter what.
ReplyDeleteI think Harriet is Michelle Trachtenberg. She's been in NYC filming and partying. Who are the celeb names at the parties she's been at?
ReplyDeleteThe typo has been corrected on E!
ReplyDeleteMy guesses how it will be handled
1. It will be ignored
2. Ted will take a question and say he just decided to change the person's name from a different moniker -- e.g. Jeremy Jumpoff to Freddie...
hehehehehehe love gossip conspiracy
@Landy - Agreed! He is an amazing actor. I always get so caught up in his films. I also love that he's not classically handsome but there's still something about him that's so sexy. Good for him whatever he may be...just keep on acting :)
ReplyDeleteFijigrrl, "Jeremy Jumpoff" was the EXACT name I had in my head when I thinking of that earlier.
ReplyDeleteI think I'll go back to Youtube now and watch more videos of Jeremy Renner singing. And then pick up some batteries on my way home.
@Vicky--LMAO!! I'm now dead. Thank you very much.
ReplyDeleteTerri Hatcher for sure. Her iconic "Seinfeld" episode was all about her breasts.
ReplyDeleteAnd I think Jeremy Renner is Freddie.
@Vicki - LOL! I just did a spit take on my computer screen. Be sure to check out his rendition of "American Pie" in "Love Comes to the Exicutioner." That voice...those arms.....*drool*
ReplyDeleteOh god I did.
ReplyDelete...those handcuffs
ReplyDelete*puffs on a cigarette*
ReplyDeleteWas it good for you, too?
I don't know about you ladies, but the one that gets me is him singing his own song on The View. *panties off, my body is ready* Love Comes...is a really sexy one as well.
ReplyDeleteSaw that as well. Gonna have to wait to be at home if he sings anything with the word "come" in it.
ReplyDeleteOh! I've just thought of this! The Harriet Talons identity has been bugging me for awhile, and this just occurred to me: Teri Hatcher. TH. Switch the letters of the first and last names, and you get HT, Harriet Talons. And if you put an H instead of a T on the first name, you get Heri... sounds like the start of Harriet.
ReplyDeleteThat's my sleuthing for the day.
It's mistakes like this that got Jake G connected to Toothy Tile. And I recall once seeing Oprah tagged on a blind item that she wasn't named in.
ReplyDeleteI dunno about Zac and Chord (aside from the singing thing), but Jeremy and RPatz have both played vampires. Jeremy was on "Angel" way back in the day
ReplyDeleteIf the original blind said Harriet Talons is at risk of getting kicked off her show even though she's one of the stars, how could this be Teri Hatcher? Her show has ended, they can't kick her off.
ReplyDeleteCan someone find the exact place Ted said this was on a network show? Otherwise I am prepared to guess Glenn Close, she's older like two of the AIA and I could just see her being a B.
Eva long-whoria
ReplyDeleteHere is the post where Ted says HT's show is long-running, i.e. more than 2 seasons, which means "GCB" does not qualify. And here is the post where Ted says HT "works on a network drama, with an emphasis on drama."
ReplyDeleteDid the original HT blind come out before it was announced that DH was ending? Because if so, it could still be Teri H, since they could have been at the end of their ropes with her and planning to kill her off, but then found out the show was ending, so they could put up with her for just a few more months. Or something like that.
ReplyDeleteI think it's Terri Hatcher.
ReplyDeleteTed described HT as being in a "Juicy Hit Series".
ReplyDelete.......juicy hit series....there is a song called Juicy (Better Than Ezra song).This song was used by Desperate Housewives in its 2005 commercials per Wiki..........
In my little universe I still think HT is TH !!!
Everyone knew before this season even began being filmed that it was their last for DH. So out of the list of GG winners on negwork TV, how does Mariska H... Sound?
ReplyDeleteUpdate: As of 5/11/12, Ted has eliminated: Ellen Pompeo, Emily VanCamp, Jessica Lange, January Jones, Christina Hendricks, Anna Paquin, Candice Accola, Juliana Marguiles, Madeline Stowe, Naya Rivera, Eva Longoria, Kristin Bauer, Elisabeth Moss, anyone from Pretty Little Liars, Mindy Kaling, Katherine Heigl, Jane Lynch, Nina Dobrev, Jennifer Morrison, Felicity Huffman, Joan Rivers, Betty White, Julie Bowen, Claire Danes
ReplyDeleteMichelle T was only Gossip Girl for a couple of episodes, she only comes on for guest appearances every now and then, and she isn't even on the show currently, and hasn't been for a few weeks.
ReplyDeleteRe: the Freddie/Jeremy AIA's... while the AIA's definitely aren't (serious) award winners, in addition to the acting/singing combo they also all have been rumored to be bi or gay at some point or another.
ReplyDeleteThe AIA's for Harriet Talons are all either 1) middle aged (or older) blonde actresses, 2) young brunette actresses, or 3) actresses who don't fit either of those but ARE on high-drama shows (DH, Revenge, Mad Men, True Blood, etc.) and thus had to be ruled out to narrow the playing field. I'm probably reading too much into that but it makes me think she's a middle-aged brunette on a high-drama network show. aka, Teri Hatcher. HT=TH didn't hurt, either.
gotta be Terri Hatcher!
ReplyDeleteaaaand Jeremy Renner
DeleteHarriet Talons is Terry Hatcher.
ReplyDeleteAnd yes, Jeremy is Jeremy Remmer.
Or Renner. Whatev.
ReplyDelete