After seeing that 10 year old girl who gave birth last week, it got me to thinking. Lets forget about 10 for a second and use 12. Should a 12 year old girl who gives birth keep her baby?
I was a babysitter @ the age of 12. I took care of an infant. But only for a few hours...and it wasn't my child. When I was in sixth grade, growing up in the upper middle class suburbs, my classmates were experimenting with sexual activities and drugs, but I doubt they really knew the repercussions of said activities. I don't think a 12 year old can make any type of good parent but I think they should have the option to keep the baby, as they went through pregnancy and gave birth. I think that should be anyones right, regardless of age, though ask me again if the age is changed back to 10.
I'd say no, just because a 12 year old is not capable in any way, shape, or form of supporting a baby. The grandparents would have to raise it, which I think is incredibly unfair to them, but if they're ok with it, then more power to them.
Loretta Lynn gave birth to her first child at 13 and was a grandmother at 26. Thankfully, while cultural mores (at least in America) have evolved to make such things a rarity, in other cultures, the tradition of "child brides" is still practiced. That being said, the health risks alone to both mother and child are frightening. My only question is how old was the father?
Enty is venturing into some controversial territory today....
IMHO, this isn't something for us as third-parties to make a general judgment on. The question of what to do with an unplanned pregnancy/birth is only for the family to decide.
As third parties, our only societal role is to make sure that all options are available (with good information available about the pros and cons) -- adoption, keeping the baby, and abortion.
Be allowed by whom? This is a dangerous concept, that her age alone should be the determining factor in taking away her child. As stated in the very first reply, this is a family issue first. It's only an issue for the government to step in if the child is proven to be in danger.
To me, a 12 year old is still a child themselves. And there are so many couples who cannot have their own children looking to adopt, if the 12 year old's family cannot/won't raise the baby.
No one - regardless of age - should have their child taken away for any reason other than proven child abuse. The person who bore the child is the mother and is the only one with the right to decide. Not even her family.
The girl was part of a south american tribe that rarely has contact with modern culture.
Culturally, for them, this was the norm and she will have the support of her entire tribe to raise the child. While the ick factor here is EXCEPTIONALLY high, we have to assume that she was exhibiting what would be perceived as signs of womanhood within the tribe, e.g. a menstrual cycle. Therefore, some male tribe member would take her as a wife. My guess is that their life spans are short and the development rate within the women is different that those who've evolved outside of a literal jungle.
If it wasnt a seperate culture, and happened here, it would depend on how a 12 yr old got pregnant, does she want to keep the baby, and who is going to help her raise the baby. Obviously if she was raped by farher, wanted no part of child, and had no support, she shouldnt be exptected to keep and care for baby.
My mom was a teacher's assistant at my local parochial grammar school (which I actually attended) and there was a 12 year who was pregnant. It was a big scandal. Her parents had to meet with school administrators to figure out a plan of action. Once the girl started showing, she was home schooled with tutors and allowed to return to school once she gave birth. I believe her parents took the baby and raised as one of their own (along with the daughter).
Well it is HER baby. If she has the support and can raise the child then yes. If the child is in a bad environment and the mother/family isnt doing anything to help the baby then call CPS. But I think this applies to every mother and not just a young mother. Age has nothing to do with motherhood.
If my 12 year old got pregnant she would not be having it. We are pro-choice at my house but 12 is still a child. Adoption is not an option either in her case. She would never be able to give a baby up and be ok. The other alternative would be hard enough,but at least she would have a chance at a somewhat normal life. A 14 year old friend of hers had a baby and kept it. She says all the time she could not be that person but she wouldn't be able to give it up either after carrying it in her body.
If my 16 or 17 year old got pregnant I would not be happy at all but if they thought they could carry the baby full-term and give it up then it might be. If the father was in the equation and wanted to participate in raising the child keeping it could happen. However, life as they know it will end. I am done having babies and do not intend to start over raising grandbabies. Which,is ultimately what happens in most of these situations. Thank goodness they want to practice abstinence as of now.
They all know if they do decide to become sexually active they can ask me for contraception. I told them insist the boy wear a condom and I will get them on the pill. We are very liberal around here about that too.
I thought Enty was asking us if it was our 12 year old daughter what would we do, so here is my response. If I had a 12 year old daughter who got pregnant her options would be closed adoption or abortion. I know too many mothers who raised their grandchildren as their own and it became a nightmare for the entire family.
I grew up in Mississippi so this story won't come as a surprise. When I was 13, my best friend Ruby, who was 12, got pregnant. At 12, I really didn't even know that much about sex. It wasn't even interested in boys. I was shocked! Some people in our town offered to help her get an abortion. Well, she told them no and that it wasn't their business. All I could think of was that she was a kid. Who wants a baby when you are a baby? Good lord, thinking back on it, it is still shocking. She had the baby and then dropped out of school. Her family moved away and that was that. Yes, I think a 12 year old shouldn't keep it. They are not mature enough to handle the responsibility.
"Should" she? Isn't that up to her and her family?
ReplyDeleteWhy not? IF she has HER family support. Yes
ReplyDeleteShe should be able to do what she wants.
ReplyDeleteIt makes me so sad that this could even be an issue...
ReplyDeleteI was a babysitter @ the age of 12. I took care of an infant. But only for a few hours...and it wasn't my child. When I was in sixth grade, growing up in the upper middle class suburbs, my classmates were experimenting with sexual activities and drugs, but I doubt they really knew the repercussions of said activities. I don't think a 12 year old can make any type of good parent but I think they should have the option to keep the baby, as they went through pregnancy and gave birth. I think that should be anyones right, regardless of age, though ask me again if the age is changed back to 10.
ReplyDeleteI'd say no, just because a 12 year old is not capable in any way, shape, or form of supporting a baby. The grandparents would have to raise it, which I think is incredibly unfair to them, but if they're ok with it, then more power to them.
ReplyDeleteLoretta Lynn gave birth to her first child at 13 and was a grandmother at 26.
ReplyDeleteThankfully, while cultural mores (at least in America) have evolved to make such things a rarity, in other cultures, the tradition of "child brides" is still practiced.
That being said, the health risks alone to both mother and child are frightening.
My only question is how old was the father?
Enty is venturing into some controversial territory today....
ReplyDeleteIMHO, this isn't something for us as third-parties to make a general judgment on. The question of what to do with an unplanned pregnancy/birth is only for the family to decide.
As third parties, our only societal role is to make sure that all options are available (with good information available about the pros and cons) -- adoption, keeping the baby, and abortion.
Be allowed by whom? This is a dangerous concept, that her age alone should be the determining factor in taking away her child. As stated in the very first reply, this is a family issue first. It's only an issue for the government to step in if the child is proven to be in danger.
ReplyDeleteTo me, a 12 year old is still a child themselves. And there are so many couples who cannot have their own children looking to adopt, if the 12 year old's family cannot/won't raise the baby.
ReplyDeleteI agree with most that it's up to the family, so yes if her mom wants to and she has her family's support.
ReplyDeleteNo one - regardless of age - should have their child taken away for any reason other than proven child abuse. The person who bore the child is the mother and is the only one with the right to decide. Not even her family.
ReplyDeleteIf she has support from family, yes. If not then adoption but never abortion; killing your baby is never the answer!
ReplyDeleteThe girl was part of a south american tribe that rarely has contact with modern culture.
ReplyDeleteCulturally, for them, this was the norm and she will have the support of her entire tribe to raise the child. While the ick factor here is EXCEPTIONALLY high, we have to assume that she was exhibiting what would be perceived as signs of womanhood within the tribe, e.g. a menstrual cycle. Therefore, some male tribe member would take her as a wife. My guess is that their life spans are short and the development rate within the women is different that those who've evolved outside of a literal jungle.
I still think it's some ick nast shit, though.
If it wasnt a seperate culture, and happened here, it would depend on how a 12 yr old got pregnant, does she want to keep the baby, and who is going to help her raise the baby. Obviously if she was raped by farher, wanted no part of child, and had no support, she shouldnt be exptected to keep and care for baby.
ReplyDeleteMy mom was a teacher's assistant at my local parochial grammar school (which I actually attended) and there was a 12 year who was pregnant. It was a big scandal. Her parents had to meet with school administrators to figure out a plan of action. Once the girl started showing, she was home schooled with tutors and allowed to return to school once she gave birth. I believe her parents took the baby and raised as one of their own (along with the daughter).
ReplyDeleteWell it is HER baby. If she has the support and can raise the child then yes. If the child is in a bad environment and the mother/family isnt doing anything to help the baby then call CPS. But I think this applies to every mother and not just a young mother. Age has nothing to do with motherhood.
ReplyDeleteIf my 12 year old got pregnant she would not be having it. We are pro-choice at my house but 12 is still a child. Adoption is not an option either in her case. She would never be able to give a baby up and be ok. The other alternative would be hard enough,but at least she would have a chance at a somewhat normal life. A 14 year old friend of hers had a baby and kept it. She says all the time she could not be that person but she wouldn't be able to give it up either after carrying it in her body.
ReplyDeleteIf my 16 or 17 year old got pregnant I would not be happy at all but if they thought they could carry the baby full-term and give it up then it might be. If the father was in the equation and wanted to participate in raising the child keeping it could happen. However, life as they know it will end. I am done having babies and do not intend to start over raising grandbabies. Which,is ultimately what happens in most of these situations. Thank goodness they want to practice abstinence as of now.
They all know if they do decide to become sexually active they can ask me for contraception. I told them insist the boy wear a condom and I will get them on the pill. We are very liberal around here about that too.
I thought Enty was asking us if it was our 12 year old daughter what would we do, so here is my response. If I had a 12 year old daughter who got pregnant her options would be closed adoption or abortion. I know too many mothers who raised their grandchildren as their own and it became a nightmare for the entire family.
ReplyDeleteAgreed
DeleteAgreed
DeleteAgreed
DeleteI grew up in Mississippi so this story won't come as a surprise. When I was 13, my best friend Ruby, who was 12, got pregnant. At 12, I really didn't even know that much about sex. It wasn't even interested in boys. I was shocked! Some people in our town offered to help her get an abortion. Well, she told them no and that it wasn't their business. All I could think of was that she was a kid. Who wants a baby when you are a baby? Good lord, thinking back on it, it is still shocking. She had the baby and then dropped out of school. Her family moved away and that was that. Yes, I think a 12 year old shouldn't keep it. They are not mature enough to handle the responsibility.
ReplyDeleteThat's Disgusting! A 12 Year Old Girl Shouldn't Even Be Having Sex???
ReplyDeleteThat's Disgusting! A 12 Year Old Girl Shouldn't Even Be Having Sex???
ReplyDelete