Friday, April 01, 2011

Four For Friday

#1 - This C+/B- movie actress is starting to make it big. She has a movie opening which should be big for her career. So, it was surprising that she was so whacked out on meth that her hands were shaking and her breath reeked at the premiere of the new movie.

#2 & 3 - This B list television actress on a hit network show has entered the movie world. She was also recently entered by this A list movie star. The two had a quick fling while filming their movie, but he dumped her. She has not lost feelings for him though and had sex with him when they saw each other earlier this week. When she asked when they would see each other again, he replied, "the next press event. If you are lucky we can hook up again then."

#4 - The Kindness I posted about an actress sponsoring families from a homeless shelter got back to the cast. Yay! I am glad they read the site. Now at least two other cast members on her current are also doing the same thing.

Random Photos Part Three

The Boobs gets top spot for finding someone willing to marry him. No truth to the rumor he cheated on her last night.
I will say this for Aubrey O'Day. At least she does not swap out her dogs all the time.
Speaking of dogs, here is Amanda Seyfried walking hers. Oh, you thought I was going to refer to Ryan Phillippe didn't you?
Bradley Cooper speaking Spanish in Madrid and answering those pesky Jenifer Aniston questions.
Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds reunited at a Green Lantern event.
Chris Rock growing out the hair.
The entire Pinsky clan and not a celebrity rehab participant among them yet.
Andy Dick could use some though.
Is that a wedding band on Tom Arnold's finger? Did he get hitched again?
A Johnny Depp looking Ellen Page.
Frances Fisher looks amazing.

Random Photos Part Two

Obviously no ghosts whispered to Jennifer Love Hewitt that this outfit is atrocious.
Aww, that's nice. Jesse Tyler Ferguson wore the sweater his grandmother gave him for Christmas.
Did not even recognize Kara DioGuardi.
Yes, Kendra, we get it. You love attention. Who does this?
Not Kirstie Alley, although it would have been much more hilarious.
Lindsay prior to her snorting coke off the sidewalk and
later that night.
Even Milla Jovovich can have a bad day in the fashion department.
Jake G and Michelle Monaghan at the premiere of their new movie.
Prince Charles looks so damn happy because he is about to get to touch the Princess.

Your Turn

Writing about Prince William earlier and his refusal to wear a wedding band, made me wonder if those of you who are married, have been married, or want to be married at some point would not wear a band. What if your partner did not want to? And have you ever had an affair with someone who said they were not married? Would a band have stopped you?

Random Photos Part One

Three parts today.

Paris Hilton meets her first black person. Then
she Tweets about it and reminds Nicky has to remind her not to use the N word.
Ryan Cabrera and the way he copes with his Joe Simpson flashbacks.
A first time appearance for Drew Van Acker. I think, but am not sure that Ryan Pinkston has been in the photos before. He has grown up a lot since his Punk'd days.
Finally. A Robin Williams part where he can bring his own wardrobe.
Reese Witherspoon shows off her wedding band after working out.
Meanwhile, Ellen Pompeo shows off her bizarre crochet workout outfit.
Samaire Armstrong is still alive.
Snoop Dogg shows off his cartoon gloves.
I think you get this look that Sarah Jessica Parker has from years of chewing gum. See that Miley?

Kendra Wilkinson Not Invited To Hugh Hefner's Wedding


Probably hoping for a quick fondle in the Playboy Mansion for old times sake, Kendra Wilkinson is a little upset that she has not received an invitation to Hugh Hefner's upcoming wedding. First of all, if there is a wedding, I don't think there will be a marriage. I want to see that license. This could all be for some reality show. I think it is pretty obvious Crystal is just in it for the money. Well, then again so were Holly and Kendra and Bridget and everyone else who has been forced to touch old man peen. Yikes. Kendra told E! news that she has another wedding that is on the same date and if she does not get a save the date card from Hef soon that she is going to the other wedding. Right. And miss a chance to be in front of the cameras? Please. After she gets kicked off DWTS in the next few weeks she will be begging for cameras and attention.

Candice Swanepoel Weighs Five Pounds And A Heidi Klum Dream


It used to be that I knew who all the Victoria's Secret models were. Now, with the exception of a couple, I have no idea who they are. I have been reduced to just looking at the pictures. However, last night for some odd reason I had a dream where Heidi Klum was in it. She came to some party I was having and brought cookies. I remember the party was in this house that looked like it had been abandoned years ago and had squatters living in it. When you opened the door it was on a beach. I also remember that Heidi wanted me to validate her parking.

Anyway, back to the story. Candice Swanepoel is a Victoria's Secret model and she has been one for awhile and has always been really curvy and while not a normal weight, at least looked normal in photos. No longer. The woman is shockingly thin. Not like Allegra Versace thin, but I would not be surprised if Candice's photos were all over the anorexia sites and people are saying they want to look like her. No you don't!! She is way too skinny and is obviously going through something right now. The two people surrounding her are only probably 95 pounds so think about how much Candice weighs. Oh, and that is Adriana Lima on the right I think. She has kind of lost that innocent look and it has been replaced with the look of someone who has spent time with Jesse James. Not saying she has, just saying how she looks.

Pro Tennis Player Hits Ball At Crying Baby

During his quarterfinal match on Wednesday night, David Ferrer was struggling with his serve. I have that problem too. I can't lift the Wii controller above my head so I invariably have to serve underhand. Then of course my mom swoops in and kills it. Don't laugh. That woman is sprightly for her age. Housedress flowing, cigarette hanging from her mouth, my mom has some skillz. I have always wanted to spell it that way. It is also how I imagine everything in the Swiss Beatz house is spelled. Everything is zed-ified. (That is for my Canadian friends) "Letz go to the park and play on the swingz."

Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah. So, there is this baby crying during the match and David had enough of the baby. After losing his serve, he launched a ball in the stands towards the direction of the baby. He did not come close to the baby, but did hit Shakira who was on the lookout for another tennis player to date. The woman is obsessed with tennis. Shakira was hit and immediately stood up and said, "I was hit. These hips don't lie."

Here is the video below, and David apologized later for the incident. The baby did stop crying.

Steve Carell And Keira Knightley?


This is going to either be the best casting decision of all time or after seeing the movie, you are going to be saying what the f**k were these people thinking of? In his first post Office project, Steve Carell is going to start shooting a movie about the end of the world. During the end of the world Steve's wife leaves him so he sets off to find his high school sweetheart. Joining him on this crusade is Keira Knightley who it sounds like ends up with Carell at the end. First of all, there seem to be a lot of people left for the end of the world. Second, I know television sitcoms are full of couples who in no way would ever match up if they were off screen. I mean normally 300 pound guys or 60 year olds with no jobs get hot women. I get that, but movies do not usually do that. I am not saying that Steve is ugly and I am not saying Keira is hot, but I am saying I don't see how there could be any chemistry at all between these two. I have not watched one Steve Carell movie where he had chemistry with anyone and this seems so much harder.

Prince William Wants The Ladies To Think He Is Single


Despite his wedding possibly being watched by a quarter of the world's population, Prince William does not want to put all his eggs in one basket. Specifically he has announced he will not wear a wedding band. This way when he heads off to the deepest darkest jungles of Africa and people with no televisions he can pretend he is not married. Yes, that ring tan line would have given him away. Maybe this is his way of hanging on to the single life. Maybe Kate Middleton does not love him enough to put a ring on it. Maybe he thinks there are four or five people who will think he is Joe Blow from Derby and would be more likely to sleep with him if he is not wearing a ring. Maybe he is saving himself for his true love Camila.

So, the vows will go something like this:

William: With this ring, I thee wed.
Kate: With this imaginary circle I am making with my fingers, I thee wed.

Should make for fabulous television.

Ted C Blind Item

Gorgeous star Sally Pearlsmyth and her equally stunning celeb partner, Percy DuBois, had a nasty breakup not long ago. That was enough to shed a tear over in itself, as they really did seem like the perfect, hot Hollywood couple. You know, when two lookers like Ryan Reynolds and Scarlet Johansson can't make it work, it puts more of an onus on folks like Sally and Percy to bring the sexy back to yummy couples.

And oh, how they tried. In fact, they tried so hard...

Sally ended up getting pregnant, even though neither star was trying to start a family just yet.

Both parents were shocked, to say the least.

However, one of the parents was more pleased by the news than the other: Percy. He was thrilled and delighted and didn't take crap from anybody who thought otherwise (like certain friends who questioned if this was a good time in his career to play pops).

Sally, on the other (less) domesticated hand, relied on countless people to help make up her mind about what to do. She asked all her representatives about it, and each one told the looker with the flowing mane the same thing: end the pregnancy. Not good timing, and all that job-oriented stuff. No one really seemed to care about Sally, the woman.

Like, maybe the answer should have been: "This is your business, not ours. It's your decision to make."

But when has anybody in Hollywood ever not taken advantage of a chance to force their way and opinion on somebody? Never!

So, over the great objections of Percy, Sally ended her pregnancy. And soon after, Percy and Sally ended their relationship, many blaming Percy for being, well, not exactly the ideal mate.

Yeah, as always, there's two sides to every story.

AND IT AIN'T: Taylor Swift and Jake Gyllenhaal, Vanessa Hudgens and Zac Efron, Eva Longoria and Tony Parker

Adam Lambert Kicked Out Of Lady Gaga's Birthday Party


Probably trying to drink away his sorrows of the love he just cannot posses, Adam Lambert was dead stinking drunk when he crashed Lady GaGa's birthday party. Lady GaGa is pretending her party is her 25th, that should be the biggest April Fool's Day joke of them all. 25? Seriously? Cough.

Apparently Adam was loud and obnoxious and was beating the walls and ceilings with his fist. He even managed to put a hole in the ceiling. Oh, when the birthday cake was brought out, Adam tried to rub cake in Lady GaGa's face and feed her a doll from the top of the cake. Adam was kicked out shortly thereafter. And no, he did not go over to that guy's house all you e-mailers ask me about everyday. For now that guy has decided to stay with his wife.

Lindsay Lohan Snorts Coke Off Sidewalk - Not Drunk



Lindsay Lohan or Klepto as she would like to be known, was in New York last night. Tired of going to the usual places in Los Angeles she has been in New York enjoying their nightspots and the free coke on their sidewalks. Back in the day immigrants came to this country because they thought our streets were paved with gold. Turns out, they are paved with white powder from Colombia.

Look at the look of triumph on Klepto's face. It could also be because she stole that jacket. Or the jewelery or the fact she did not put $50 in the sidewalk coke snorting meter. When asked why she was on the sidewalk, Lindsay said she did not get drunk when she got tipsy. Seriously. That was her reply.

BuzzFoto Blind Item

This D List bleach blond celebrity recently visited a spiritualist that told her that she is the spirit of Marilyn Monroe reincarnated. She was also promised that her career would blossom into something bigger than Ms. Monroe’s if the D Lister would visit the Westwood Village Memorial Park Cemetery where Marilyn is interned at least once a month for a year. The D Lister has already visited twice.

Thursday, March 31, 2011

New Jersey Woman Can't Close Her Eyes

Marilyn Leisz has had a bunch of plastic surgery. A ton of it. So much in fact that her doctors warned back in 2005 that the procedure she wanted done would be dangerous because she had so much work done. Well, the procedure worked, but there is one downside. Marilyn cannot close her eyes anymore. Yep. 24 hours a day, 7 days a week Marilyn has her eyes open.

"That's how it is when I sleep. That's how it is 24-7, 365 days a year. All the favorite things I used to, like tennis, racquetball, swimming, horseback riding, bike riding, skeet shooting, gardening, I can't do those things."

Do you do those with your eyes closed? Skeet shooting? Really? I want you to know that when I garden, which is almost never, I always do it with my eyes closed so I know exactly how she feels. Who on earth could possibly ride a bike with their eyes open too? Oh, the horrors if you kept them open. Naturally Marilyn is suing her doctor although no one is sure why she waited 5 years to sue. Maybe she thought it was kind of neat the first few years? You know, kid sneaks in the house thinking everyone is asleep and there is mom on the couch with eyes wide open watching Eyes Wide Open. Wow.

Everyone Is So Excited About Wonder Woman

Apparently there are way too many people with way too much time on their hands. Wonder Woman recently started filming here in LA and as soon as the Justice League nerds got wind of what she was wearing, they turned to the message boards of the world and began to whine. Well, that whining paid off because suddenly a few days later, Wonder Woman showed up in exactly what they wanted her to be wearing and the world was at peace. Just until the invisible plane shows up. How can you complain about that though because you can't see it right? Below is the appropriate costume as judged by Geeks R Us.

Holly Madison Begging For Her Own Dating Reality Show


Did you know that Holly Madison had broken up with her latest boyfriend? Did you even know she had a latest boyfriend? Do you even care that Holly Madison exists? Well, she does and did, and is leaving hints a mile long and wide that she wants a reality show about her dating. She gave Kneepads an interview and says she wants to meet her soul mate and that she is always looking and that she is so busy she does not have time and blah blah blah. Basically she is screaming at producers to cast her in a dating show. She probably would love The Bachelorette but would settle for Rock Of Love the female version. Probably not as much sex in the tour bus, and the guys would probably not all be strippers and escorts.

Meh. I have seen worse ideas.

I Thought Real Housewives Was Done With Cities


With the recent dropping of Washington DC, I thought I read or heard somewhere that Bravo promised no more new cities for Real Housewives. Well, they lied. Kind of. They are open to the idea of a Real Housewives of Toronto and have started casting. Honestly, I think I would have picked Vancouver over Toronto. Yes, I know people in Toronto think they are the center of Canada, but Vancouver has a more Hollywood vibe and maybe we would get another version of Beverly Hills. With Toronto I think it will be a lot like New York and New Jersey. I do think Canada deserves their own Real Housewives and maybe it will not even be shown in the States. I think there is a Real Housewives of Sweden or at least there was a pilot for it, but the funny thing was all the Swedish women lived in Los Angeles.

I'm Tired Of Jersey Shore And They Want A Raise


Does anyone actually watch every episode of Jersey Shore? I don't mean like if you are sitting around on a Saturday and MTV goes through an entire season in an afternoon. I am talking about making sure you are in front of your television each week to watch it or record it. Does anyone do that? I have watched about ten episodes of the show. Give or take one or two. Here is how every episode has gone so far.

Afternoon - Ronnie and Sammi fight while Snooki and Jwoww go shopping. Rest of cast making dinner

Evening - Ronnie and Sammi fight while cast eats dinner

Night - Ronnie and Sammi fight and everyone in cast goes to same club they always go to.

Late night - Ronnie and Sammi fight (usually these are the best fights) and everyone else in the cast smushes.

Late late night - all the women smushees are kicked out.

Now, to star in this activity, most of the cast wants raises. This is to go with their raises from last season and the one prior to that. I don't blame them because this is it for the show. Italy will be it and I am grateful. I wonder if Ronnie and Sammi will fight on the plane over and get kicked off.

Leo DiCaprio - One Day Equals $5M


If you want Leonardo DiCaprio to star in your new commercial you better have just won the lottery. Leo just signed a deal to star in a television commercial for a Chinese cell phone company. Leo will work one day and earn $5M for the one day of work. Well, there is the traveling there and back of course. I mean he has to get a little something for his effort to get there. Can you imagine getting paid that much money for one day of work? This company must be pretty confident that having Leo talk into their phones must be going to make them a whole lot of money. While he is there maybe he can shoot Lost In Translation 2 - Off To China. Too bad Scarlett J is f**king Sean Penn because it could have worked.

Miley Cyrus Trashes Rebecca Black And Justin Bieber


Talk about calling the kettle black. Miley Cyrus gave an interview to the Australia Daily Telegraph and in the interview was asked about Rebecca Black. Rebecca is of course the brand new millionaire who has the awful song Friday. "It should be harder to be an artist. You shouldn't just be able to put a song on YouTube and go on tour." Umm, an artist? Did Miley Cyrus just call herself an artists? Is talking about her craft next? Also, didn't Justin Bieber put himself on YouTube and then got himself a record deal and went on tour because of that?

For the record let us reflect how Miley became and artist. Hard work? Making tons of demo records while scratching out a living as a waitress at Denny's?

How about getting daddy to talk to his record and television friends. Yeah, much, much harder to become an artist that way.

BuzzFoto Blind Item

Which C list celebrity who just starred in a commercial overseas made so many racial slurs during the taping of the bit that the manager waived their fee out of embarrassment?

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Fans Take Dead Guy To Soccer Game

Forget sneaking in a flask of your favorite adult beverage to a sporting event. That is child's play compared to what this group of people did in Colombia. Apparently their newly deceased friend was a huge fan of soccer and a particular team. So, instead of just burying the guy with the team colors and playing the team's song at the funeral, they went way way further. They took the dead body, in a coffin, not Weekend At Bernie's style and brought him to a game involving his favorite team.

The Kardashians Have Entered The World Of Redbook


For the past couple of years I have hoped and prayed and lit a million candles in the hopes that the 15 minutes of The Kardashians would tick by really quickly. For now they have been pretty much confined to their little corner of the planet known as E! and people downloading Kim Kardashian's porn video. Not exactly a mainstream audience. Their one foray into the mainstream, Kim's appearance on DWTS went away quickly. Now however, I fear for the worst. They are on the new cover of Redbook. A special family issue of Redbook. My mom, blissfully unaware of most things Kardashian will now open up her mailbox and find the family staring out at her and will enter her consciousness for the first time. I foresee long hours forced to watch marathons of Keeping Up With The Kardashians and Christmas specials and cookbooks and do not see an end in sight. We all struggled and won with Speidi and the majority of The Hills cast. We are winning the war against Paris. I just don't know about this one though. I think we might lose and be stuck with this family for a very long time.

You Have Got To Be &%$#*&^%(*! Kidding Me


Some idiot over at The Hearst Corporation has decided that what they need more than anything in the world is for The Goopster to have her very own magazine. Yep. You read that right. Get ready for The Goopster to be staring out at you every single month when you buy your groceries. The magazine will be a food magazine which I find really entertaining considering that The Goopster spent the vast majority of her life complaining about food, not eating food, making fun of food, and judging by her weight, probably not eating much of it when she did. Yes, what the world needs right now is her spouting off about food she is probably not making, will not make, will not eat, and convincing the masses she does. If it is as accessible as her newsletter, every item will probably cost a fortune, not be available in North America and only be available by some woman who lives in some corner of the world, grows the food in some window box and sells them for $500 a pound.

No Charges Against Lindsay For Rehab Fight


This was a pretty weak case to begin with and when the accuser took money from tabloids and probably from Lindsay Lohan's people, and went silent, it made it even more difficult. If there is a she said she said incident and no marks and everyone stays silent, what are you going to do? Well, the prosecutors in Riverside County decided they would not be moving forward against Lindsay for the Betty Ford shoving incident. Was it shoving? Maybe it was more like a scuffle. Whatever it was, it is gone now and Lindsay can move on to her various civil trials and her upcoming felony grand theft trial followed probably by a bankruptcy so she can avoid paying her legal bills.

Dancing With The Stars


I think we could all pretty much assume that Psycho Mike would be the first contestant kicked off the new season of the show. With the exception of drunk college kids calling into Loveline, does anyone really know who he is. Unless he came out and danced like Fred Astaire, you knew he was going to be gone. I feel sorry for Lacey Schwimmer because she is one of my favorites and now she will be gone for the rest of the season. I refused to watch last night because of Chris Brown appearing but thought Tom Bergeron was great when he said he would ask Chris Brown about everything if he was allowed to interview him. He wasn't. Also Cheryl Burke said if it were up to her, she would not have Chris on the show. Obviously it was not up to her. Kudos for those two for making the a-hole feel unwelcome. I also thought it was interesting that Chris Brown chose to sing Forever. I think he did that because he wanted people in the audience to associate him with that song because they probably like it. Therefore they would like him. Fail.

BuzzFoto Blind Item

A year ago after a movie premiere this A List star and B list star had a hookup that resulted in a short lived affair, even though both are married. Now, a year later the actress has a new baby and the actor is wondering if it’s his.

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Blind Item

This host of an A+ network reality show and producer and radio guy was at a club two weeks ago. At the club he started making out with some random woman he had been flirting with. Apparently most people were shocked not that he was cheating on his D list celebrity girlfriend, but that he was actually making out with a woman.

Kevin Federline To Be A Dad...Again


I know that because of Kevin Federline's expanding girth that he was expecting a baby, but it turns out that girth is just fat and that it is his girlfriend who is expecting a baby. The man who just cannot have enough baby mamas in his life is apparently going to add one more to his growing collection. Not content to let Lil Wayne beat him out in number of baby mamas, Kevin and Victoria Prince are expecting a baby. It's a good thing kids eat free at Denny's.

Enrique Says Adios To Britney


Britney Spears had a huge announcement about her tour and the opening act was going to be Enrique Iglesias. That lasted all of about two hours. No reason was given for the sudden departure, but I am guessing someone told Enrique he would be a full act and not the traditional opener and someone said, no, we just want you to do 30 minutes or some kind of nonsense. Either that or he did not want to be gone from Anna Kournikova that long. You would think that prior to any announcement being made that all of this would have been worked out. Someone will probably lose their job.

Matthew Knowles Stops Living Off His Daughter


Apparently Beyonce thinks she needs to take her career in a direction that does not involve paternity tests, lawsuits and allegations of cheating. No, she is not breaking up with Jay-Z. Instead Beyonce and her father have split ways professionally. I can understand that. I mean at this point how much more money does Matthew need to make off his daughter. He has made himself a fortune off his daughter, and will just have to find new things to do. How much work do you think he actually did for Beyonce? Yes, when she was starting out he probably did, but I bet he has not done much the past ten years other than collect a paycheck.

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