Although Katy Perry took to her Twitter to say she did not file for divorce yesterday as was originally reported, I don't think it will be long. They rarely see each other and when they do, they make a point of making sure the cameras see them. Instead of hiding away in their house, they go out and make sure they are seen. I don't think Russell Brand has changed since he got married. He is still the same woman loving guy he has always been. I do have this question, and it does not have to be about Russell. If you are a person who says that you want to have sex with six women a day and do your very best to accomplish that feat, do you love women or not? It seems to me that if you are trying to see that many women at once that you are simply using them and trying to almost have assembly line sex. Not like Hef though. He just lays there, and I believe that Russell probably does a move or two.
How about those women who do sleep with a guy for 15 minutes and move on?
ReplyDeleteGood for them, or pathetic attention grabbing Kardashians?
If more women were raised with better self esteem, the likes of Russell Brand would fade away into nothingness.
No, you don't love women, you might love sex and you definitely love attention.
ReplyDeleteI feel like the Shame movie might shed light on this.
But seriously, a bunch of random encounters trying to trick women into wanting you for 15 minutes isn't even liking women, it's seeing them as something to use and then send away.
And Rita, you're so right about the self esteem.
Having lots of sex is not equivalent to having low self esteem. It's only low self esteem if you're sleeping around to validate your insecurities. If you're doing it because *you* like it, and on *your* terms, it's fro
ReplyDeleteStrength.
As for Brand, no one changes their spots that dramatically for one guy or gal. He will only change when he wants to, and for himself. Katy Perry made the mistake of thinking he would change for her.
How about sex to anesthetize your feelings or fend off dark thoughts? Or because it's easier than connecting with someone in an emotionally intimate way?
ReplyDeleteWell, I didn't think their marriage had a very good chance at success but sometimes reformed womanizers make great husbands (or maybe that's just a myth). I guess the key is being "reformed."
I don't think he's a misogynist -- I just think he's a thrill-seeker who focuses on sex for that high. To his credit, it doesn't seem as if he is using any sort of promise of a future relationship to lure any of these women, only the promise of a momentary good time. I also think it makes him an entitled brat for thinking this behavior is necessary or healthy.
ReplyDeleteHe might use women, but I have no doubts that most of the women he uses know exactly what they're doing, too, and are probably seeking the same sex/excitement high he is. Just sayin'.
It just sounds like he has an addiction issue. Previously, wasn't it drugs and alcohol? Now, it seems like sex. Doesn't sound like he loves women, rather he loves doing what he WANTS to do. Obviously, these actions hurt his wife. I don't understand why people who want to screw around get married.
ReplyDelete@Seachica, I don't think that women who have casual sex are wrong, AT ALL. A woman in charge of her sexuality knows what she wants, the consequences of her desires, and acts in accordance of her sexual desire and feeling on the subject.
ReplyDeleteI simply wonder how those "fans" felt waiting in line to be screwed and dispensed of?
That is where self-esteem plays into thought process.
Or is my vagina still too attached to my soul, and cannot disconnect both to better understanding of "waiting-in-line-to-be-screwed-by-a-star"?
"I kissed a girl and diddled her skittle"???? Oh, Katy Perry, you're so fucking EDGY. Like Taylor Momsen. *eyeroll*
ReplyDeleteHe has come out and said he's a recovering alcoholic, drug addict, and yes, sex addict. It sucks if he is back to his old ways. I hate that for both of them.
ReplyDeleteNo Katy, you are just a talentless hack, and I for the life of me, cannot figure out why you are famous.
ReplyDeleteI don't believe in sex addiction. I think almost everyone likes sex, some more than others. I think some people value a lasting relationship with one person, while others value many many one-nighters. I think some like sex once a month and others want it two or three times a day. It's an appetite, like for food. Some people love one food, others love another, some can eat reasonable amounts, others binge on it. I just don't think you can put it in the same category as drug addiction and alcoholism. I think "sex addict" is often used to cover up the real problem, which is douchebag.
ReplyDeleteI just can't stand that girl. She tries so damn hard, it's irritating. And for what's it worth (nothing), I think their marriage is fake.
ReplyDeleteOh Syko, I agree with you, but every time you talk of sex, I just look at your tired pussy in your avatar and giggle.
ReplyDeleteOnce again, many apologies Syko, when it comes to this, I can't seem to help myself. I may need sex rehab too.
Brand has admitted to sex addiction and I believe he was in therapy for it, was he not? An addiction is an addiction and there can be several reasons for it (many of which you good people listed above including abuse, neglect, abandonment, etc.). I'm also looking forward to seeing "Shame". One of my girlfriends (I had to cut her out of my life because she kept trying to sleep with every boyfriend I had since we were 18) is a sex addict, and it is very TRYING to be around this sort of addiction, for sure.
ReplyDeleteI dunno, I like Brand, I wish him and Katy well.
There's something about Russell Brand that I like too, but let's face it, he's not normal. Yes he has an addiction problem, but there's also something about his personality that reminds me of some of the personality traits of hoarders. I don't know how I feel about the existence or not of 'sex addiction' but there is definitely a synapse in RB's brain that doesn't fire properly. I don't think he's a bad person, but addicts who aren't in therapy must be tough to live with.
ReplyDeleteNo problem, Rita, I like raunchy remarks. :)
ReplyDeleteRocketQueen, you can let yourself get addicted to anything. A certain food, a certain shampoo - I must always have a box of Caramel Nips with the chocolate filling on my desk, so I suppose that's an addiction. But I still don't buy sex addiction, I think it's a behavior, and not one that's attractive in a married man. It just sounds better to say "Oh, poor thing, he can't help screwing everything with a pulse, he's a sex addict" rather than saying he's a manwhore. Your girlfriend that hit on all your guys - she's a slut, not an addict, she's trying to validate herself with her vagina, which is pretty sad.
*LOL* @ ChopChop. SO edgy! *L*
ReplyDeleteI have a hard time with the term "sex addict" too, but it could be because I watched that one season of Celebrity Rehab, and I thought the only thing anyone there was addicted to was attention and possibly meth.
@Syko, with all due respect, I disagree, although I understand where you're coming from in regards of douchiness and whorish behavior.
ReplyDeleteBut beyond promiscuity, there is something that becomes a compulsion. Something that gets imprinted on your reactive behavior, that compulses you into the same destructive behavior, thus becoming addiction.
Because no matter how conscious at times you are of your destructive behavior, there is a compulsion, even with the conscious effort of trying to resist, that pushes you into same destructive behavior, resulting in feeling more and more shame.
And the path to breaking addiction is through abstinence. This is true for alcoholics, drug addicts, food addicts (must find the kind of food that triggers your destructive behavior, not talking of dying of hunger here), as well as sex addicts.
Sex addiction is real and it is a sad sad way to live. Those people do not enjoy sex, but rather, need sex and obsess over it and must engage in it regardless of the consequences of their actions. Also, the sex is usually followed by intense guilt, despair and negative self views. Often they promise themselves that they will not engage in the activity again (could also include excessive masterbation, etc etc but are helpless to stop themselves. It's a terrible cycle. Often times they are prescribed SSRIs, but they aren't always effective as treatment, and there can be other associated disorders like bipolar disorder.
ReplyDeleteI think that a lot of people use the term when they really mean to say that they are highly sexual, which is entirely different. Even if the person seeks out a lot of partners, the fact that they say that they enjoy it and look forward to it, would lead me to believe that they may just have a larger sexual appetite than most. Though a lot of people tend to substitute sex, or other things, for drugs when they become sober.
co-sign Lori, although I do think there are a lot of people out there who claim sex addiction to justify their behaviour and are not true sex addicts - and Maja the Celeb Sex rehab had some people who were a perfect example of that. Also my understanding of sex addiction is that due to the guilt and negative self image they experience, they will often use drugs to attempt to block out those feelings
ReplyDeleteAgree to disagree, Syko ;) As someone who's done time in rehab and knows someone with this addiction, it is very real. Anytime one has a compulsion to do something over and over that continuously ruins their life, they have an addiction.
ReplyDeleteFurther, addicts often substitute one addiction for another when the stop the first. In Brand's case, he gave up heroin and took up sex. In my case, I managed to stop my eating disorder but took up cocaine. A lot of alcoholics become gambling addicts.
The only thing I'm worried about right now is this queasiness from imagining Russell Brand busting a move.
ReplyDeleteok, i actually feel sorrier for Russell than Katy in this relationship. She drimks heavily, and I'm pretty sure uses drugs, and since sobriety seems important to Russell, she should either choose not to drink/drug or leave. The same thing with meat.. he asked her to go vegitarian in their wedding vows and it didn't stick. And, having met him in a airport..yes, he's unattractive but after talking to him for 20 minutes I can see how he gets women in bed. You are the most interesting/beautiful/intelligent/etc woman in the world when he is talking to you.. he'll make you believe it.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I've read his books and he comes across as smart/insightful/honest. Don't knw if the same can be said about her.
ReplyDeleteWell thanks for the insight everyone. I was in the group that thought this sex addiction category was complete BS. Now I understand it more, and can see how it can be deeply compulsive behavior with the horrible cycle of guilt. However, I think many of these celebrities (Duchovny for one) just use the term when they're caught cheating outside of marriage, so they still look good to the public. Of course I don't know for sure about David, using him for an example. I would like to like him again tho!
ReplyDelete@Syko..until my gay friend told me he was going into treatment for sex addiction I had never heard of it either. But sadly it is real and for him it was tied to low self esteem. Like RQ said you can often swap one addiction for another and for a while my friend focused on food. He eventually recovered fully. Now, he's a suburban married (gay) man. If you really want to heal you can.
ReplyDeleteI would also recommend seeing the movie "Shame". It is supposed to shed light on this addiction.
Rita, you and I must be cut of the same cloth. I believe women can completely be in charge of their vajayjays and get what they want, be libidinous and not hurt someone in the process. Everyone goes away happy.
As long as you don't Vajjazzle, I'm cool with whatever you vadge for vajayjay:)
ReplyDeleteAnd yeah everyone, there is a huge difference between having a high libido, and getting high on sex. Huge!
@Rita..I am still trying to figure out how a vajjazzling would not be painful! And, I am as fastiduous as most but that's a little too much competition for the "girls" up north. Can't have 'em lingering in the valley and not even visiting the mountains.
ReplyDelete@Jaded & @msgirl- I agree. some people use others' misunderstanding of sexual addiction to their advantage, like as an excuse for cheating. The way it is framed when we hear that a celebrity has a sexual addiction or compulsivity does make it sound like it is some fancy PR excuse to make the public feel sorry for them and shift blame for their actions. I happen to think it's a terrible thing to do. It diminishes the impact and value of the diagnosis. It also contributes to why we have so many people say that they do not believe that it is a true addiction. I feel the same way about depression. Yes, tragic events can trigger clinical depression in people that may be pre-disposed to the illness, but generally people use the word interchangebly with sad i.e. my dog died and I'm so depressed. Chances are that you are just sad...which is a completely normal response to a stimulus. Depression is not an emotion...it is a biochemical disorder (with genetic and environmental contributing factors). There are biochemical aspects to addiction, as well.
ReplyDeleteOh NO QUESTION some people (esp. celebs) use the 'addiction' excuse when they're actually just assholes. No question. Jesse James and David Duchovny come to mind. But it IS a real thing.
ReplyDeleteLori - great post.
OT, well chopchop did kinda mention it, well her:
ReplyDeleteTaylor Momsen
No pics, no stories for ages. Where she be?
@Vicki said...
ReplyDelete"OT, well chopchop did kinda mention it, well her:
Taylor Momsen
No pics, no stories for ages. Where she be?"
Opening for Guns N' Roses
http://www.thesuperficial.com/taylor-momsen-opened-for-guns-n-roses-11-2011
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteInteresting thread...Someone I know (who I already didn't have a great amount of respect for, because I don't think they are the greatest person in the world) took time off to go to whatever sex addiction camp Tiger Woods attended. I always kind of laughed at his claim, but I never really thought about the underlying causes for his behavior. This gives me a little bit of perspective. Even though I still think he's an a-hole. :)
ReplyDeleteKP had to have known what she was getting into when she married RB. I don't hate either one of them. This was just one of those marriages doomed from the start.
Russell may have been 'using' women, but I'm equally sure those same women were also 'using' him as a trophy screw.
ReplyDeletePersonally, I don't find him attractive, but he seems funny and smart and there may be more to these two than you'd suspect.
I think I missed something. Did he cheat on her or is this a rumour?
ReplyDeleteSex addiction is as real as any other. Addicts are trying to fill a void or escape and they do it any way they can.
However, he has chosen to get sober and change in so many ways it seems, if he chose to marry he would ave chosen to be monogomous as well (unless there is an arrangement). If you make changes they can stick but it has to be your choice.
She does seem disrespectful of his sobriety though. Must be hard for him.