Twitter says that Beyonce has given birth to a baby daughter named Tiana-May Carter (above). I was really thinking that Beyonce was going to give "birth" at 12:01am on January 1st. I was convinced that as part of this whole thing that she wanted the first baby in the country to be "born" in 2012. You know, if you are going to do the publicity thing for a baby, and lets face it, that is exactly what Beyonce has done since day 1 of her announcement, then you have to keep going big or go home. My other thought was that Beyonce would give birth this week and then perform at a concert tomorrow night as a surprise and wear a bikini while doing it. You know, if she did that, people would still think the baby is really hers and that she lost that weight in two days and want to buy her diet.
Oh dear God! Hold me.
ReplyDeleteIs that really a photo of Beyonce?
ReplyDeleteThat photo just made me spit my coffee out.
ReplyDeleteHi, penelope. It's a mash-up of Beyonce and Jay.
ReplyDeleteFunny composite photo....yes Jay-Z is not an attractive man....
ReplyDeleteBeyonce has no control over when the surrogate gives birth but they can fudge the date...
I wonder if the kid starts to get ugly if she'll hide it away...never to be seen again..
That picture is great!!
ReplyDeleteIf she did "give birth" already, I'm sure it was for tax break purposes....
If the pregnancy is fake, as enty keeps suggesting, can someone please explain the photo of her earlier in the year where she clearly looked pregnant (best guesstimation five months). I could buy a fake baby bump under clothing, even a one piece,but in a bikini?!
ReplyDeleteA little warning, next time you're going to post a photo like that. Geez S. Christ!
ReplyDeleteWhen were the music awards? Didn't she only announce her pregnancy about two months ago? There is no way she was 6 or 7 months pregnant at the awards show.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the explanation, @Mel. Very scary!
ReplyDeleteWhew! I am so glad that the baby was born today. I am a selfish person and didn't feel like sharing my birthday with "the chosen one". That mashup is great! Who knew JZ would look so sessy in a weave?
ReplyDeleteLOL!!! That's a photo of JZ and Beyonce meshed together. That's what their kid will look like in about 20 years.
ReplyDeleteBigMama, today is my birthday. I also have Tiger Woods and LeBron James.
ReplyDeletethat baby was born fast....., didn't she just announce she was expecting?
ReplyDeleteI read a commenter who called bs on this story and said to just watch, it'll come 1/4.....(I think Jayonce's birthdays are 4's - I'm not really into the jigga man and b).
ReplyDeleteSounded plausible. I for one will wait to see.
It was the surrogates 2nd child....maybe she can't count.
ReplyDeleteLOL pic
ReplyDeleteThat pic is horrifying!
ReplyDeleteTHANK you, lady wawa!!! I'm no Bey fan, but this whole fake pregnancy scandal is dumb.
ReplyDeleteI sooooooo needed that laugh!!! Thank you Enty!
ReplyDeletein the 'pregnant' bikini picture, she's pushing her stomach out. she's big from right below her boobs all the way down. i'm positive of that.
ReplyDeleteshe's had TONS of surgical sculpting and shaping on her bod. i also know THIS for a fact. no way she was having a baby herself. but yes, we'll see how fast she gets 'back into shape' on every magazine cover in the next couple of months.
the bullshit these people do amazes me.
That photo is out of control.
ReplyDeletethat lady is reeallly "attractive"
ReplyDeletemy eyes! my eyes! ahhhhhhhhh
ReplyDeleteMy new favorite picture! Please use that for all posts about those two. I am begging you.
ReplyDeleteThat picture makes me seriously happy in a deranged kind of way!
ReplyDeleteHappy Birthday Mikey!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteIf you don't believe a fake pregnancy belly can look real, check out The Seventh Sign with Demi Moore. There is a scene where she gets out of a bath with a fake belly and my mum, who had two children, swore she was pregnant. Couldn't believe she wasn't when I told her.
ReplyDeleteAw, thanks BigMama! Party starts at 5 today and ends on the 1st.
ReplyDeletesounds better than mine, husband is working, teen is working, babies are sick and so far Kanye hasn't taken me up on my offer of a 6 pack and come cake.
ReplyDeleteJesus, that picture is fucking FRIGHTENING!
ReplyDeleteSo Russell Brand just filed for divorce! Enty, I am a believer!
ReplyDeleteThat Beyzus picture is genius!
Watched the video again, while the foamy tummy folds, and yeah, must say, from all my friends, the pregnant tummy never folds that way.
Too bad, I wanted to believe. If she gives birth today: 12-30-2011 = 1. So no go.
@Mikey @BigMama happy B'days!
Thanks Rita! I would like to add that due to a typo, my previous comment should have read SOME cake. Typos = making every day reading an adventure.
ReplyDelete^I miss cake! Have an extra huge-ass vanilla and chocolate filled slice for me BigMama! And let me know how it tasted. It weirdly calms my cravings:)
ReplyDeleteI keep giggling at the photo but it's the "... baby daughter named Tiana-May Carter (above)" that's really hilarious. Like a soap-opera baby that overnight morphs into an adult.
ReplyDeleteThe picture of her in a bikini is what did settled it for you? I am not saying I believe the fake pregnancy rumor but that just looked like she had a big lunch and pushed her stomach out! I can do that! :)
ReplyDeleteI can push my stomach out and make it HUGE. I figured I could do it better than any of my friends because Ive had some kids. There are some pictures of her in a semi sheer cover up and bikini but thats about it.
ReplyDeleteOMG! That us the scariest picture I have seen in a long time. I hope I don't have nightmares.
ReplyDeleteBWAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!! Great pic Enty, you've really outdone yourself with this one!
ReplyDeleteBTW, Am I still the only one who thinks "surrogate" is giving these two too much credit? I still wouldn't be surprised if his mistress got pregnant and they're faking this pregnancy so J can be seen with the kid without harassment about it.
maybe she's so into this because mariah is getting attention with the twins (who are adorable!). seems odd that after not even admitting she and J-whatever were a couple, she'd do all this.
ReplyDeleteshe's had TONS of surgical sculpting and shaping on her bod. i also know THIS for a fact.
ReplyDeletePlease spill, nancer! This is always so fascinating for me.
I thought Jay said when he had a daughter he would name her Brooklyn. Tiana is great (my middle name so I'm biased), but Tiana-May? Sounds really, really kuntry. Oh well, mazel!
ReplyDelete@mike
ReplyDeleteDon't forget Matt Lauer and Meredith Viera!
That picture is going to get blown up and mounted in my closet.
ReplyDeleteRenoBlondee took the words right out of my fingers.
ReplyDeleteThat picture is horrifying.
ReplyDeleteI'm really interested to see how this baby mess pans out.