Monday, November 28, 2011

Suri Cruise Is Writing A Book


No doubt the book currently being authored and illustrated by Suri Cruise will be amazing. Not one to let Will Smith's children to have careers and not their child, In Touch is reporting that Suri Cruise is writing a book. Not only that but she is also illustrating the book herself. "Suri is smart beyond her years. Not only is she writing the book, she's also working on all the illustrations. She is actually very talented for someone so young."

Guess what the book is about? No, it is not about a girl who wonders why her parents spend so much time hooked up to machines, but rather the story of a little girl who lives in a big house in Beverly Hills. Yeah, that I can see how other six year old kids could relate to that.

38 comments:

  1. Well she is the second coming of L Ron. Maybe she'll put out a Thetan coloring book, too.

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  2. Are we that gullible? They must see something we don't see, to market a book written and drawn by Suri Cruise, means there must be a market, and a profitable one at that.

    I want to see a documentary on how Suri really "wrote" this book.

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  3. i read this article yesterday and Katie Holmes was quoted as saying Suri is "an amazing athlete, singer and dancer" Seriously? Who calls a kid Suri's age an ATHLETE?!?!

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  4. Anonymous9:41 AM

    but naturally the "amazing" adjective was included!!

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  5. "amazing"!!!
    @Vicky: LOL

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  6. Ugh...tell me that is not an amazingly real fur coat worn by an amazing little girl who is amazingly talented by her amazing parents...

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  7. In defense of Katie, every mother worth her salt thinks their kid is "amazing". Although the Cruise and Smiths take it to a whole new level.

    At least, like Jada has previously said, the parents are not dependent on their kids money making potential, like the Lohans. They have simply the means to make their kids' wishes come true. Admittedly, to a truly different level than anyone else has ever seen before:)

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  8. this unrepentant narcissism makes me sick to my stomach.

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  9. I just had an amazing eye roll.

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  10. After all this build up over nothing, plus entitlement issues, Suri's going to grow up to be one bitter, brokenhearted bitch. She's all set to be "amazing" just by waking up everyday.

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  11. Patty, I had an amazing eyeroll while I was eating my amazing lunch (really was amazing; love Trader Joe's veggie wraps!), and now I'm about to have an amazing bowel movement.

    Rita, people are only making fun of Katie using "amazing" because she uses it to describe EVERYTHING.

    Guess she's not at the Thetan level where you can use a thesaurus.

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  12. Vicki - I get it. But truly love your Thesaurus and Thetan inclusion, quite the tongue roll. Now, that is amazing. And bon appétit!

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  13. Cruise's famewhoring of this kid is getting Kris Jenner-ish to me.

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  14. Patty and Vicki

    BWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAHAHHAHHAHAHAHAHHA

    It's AMAZING that I didn't hurt myself laughing!!

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  15. Thank you annabella! Totally agree. That pic looks so much like Katie, more than usual to me.

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  16. Honestly, I think this kid is going to be a nightmare. Paris Hilton will have nothing on this one.

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  17. OF COURSE she is...*sigh*.

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  18. Well, I, for one, think this is long overdue. For goodness sake, think what we can all learn from Suri's many and varied life experiences. Stop it, haters!

    heh.

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  19. Oh, I thought they meant the assistant on the iPhone. I would buy that book, but I won't buy anything by the Cruise spawn.

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  20. I find it very strange that Cruise has three kids but really only pushes (or pimps out) Suri to the public. Is it him or Katie behind it? When Cruise was with Kidman, you never saw their kids unless it was a child appropriate red carpet film or through the very long lens of the paps. It is all very odd

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  21. Astrid, I was thinking the same thing. She's turning into quite the little Kim K.

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  22. Mialou, it's Tom. Katie's too doped up on Thetan-blocking "vitamins" to have any control over her. Little Tommy's pimping her out like the little princess he has always wanted to be.

    Can NOT wait for her inevitable lesbionic rebellion and tell-all book.

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  23. What Anabella said.

    And I keep thinking about Rita's comment, "They must see something we don't see, to market a book written and drawn by Suri Cruise means there must be a market, and a profitable one at that." That's absolutely true and I'm wondering who the hell would want to buy this.

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  24. Wow, she truly looks demonic here.

    I'm sorry...that's a terrible thing to say about a little child. But...the devil made me do it. Ha.

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  25. If Barbara Bush's dog could write a best seller, why not Suri? Oh yeah, and it will be AMAZING.

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  26. I didn't know it was possible to dislike a little girl so much. Now I feel bad.

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  27. Anonymous1:59 PM

    Don't feel bad, Skinny, I"m right there with you on that. This is not an attractive child - and I'm not talking her appearance. It's her demeanor, her brattiness. Sad, really. I mean, have you ever seen this kid in jeans and flip-flops? Ever see her playing with other kids? Wearing makeup and heels before she's even school age - that used to be a big rite of passage for teen girls, I think I was 13 before I had a pair of heels and about that age when I started wearing "Tangee Natural" lipstick. And it was a cool, neat thing to reach that milestone, right up there with first period and first kiss. This kid is doing it all before the age of 7. Ridiculous.

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  28. If she's sooo amazing, WHERE IS HER ASSISTANT?

    Answer me THAT.

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  29. there has alwys been something about this kid that disturbs me. but the book thing should be a good laugh! someone on here mentioned the site called, suri's burn book. can't remember who it was. omg, thanks for the tip. if you haven't read it you should check it out. very snarky about other celeb kids and suri's "parents"

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  30. Yeah, I thought this post was going to be about Suri's Burn Book turning into a real book.

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  31. Amazingly enough, Hubbard's books stay on best seller lists because people come in and buy cases of the books and pay in cash. And even more amazing, one of the stores that reports such amazing sales is right across the street from the LA Scientology Center. So i guess it won't really be amazing if Suri soon becomes amazingly independently wealthy.

    And Suri is so amazing that she doesn't need an assistant; she can do anything amazingly by herself.

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  32. Y'all believe InTouch?

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  33. Look at that outfit. Someone amazing sucks at dressing herself.

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  34. Bn1016, Katie called Suri "an amazing WOMAN" when she was TWO YEARS OLD.

    I hate this kid. I love children in general, but this kid is the Devil.

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  35. Paris, as much as I hate children, I can't help but defend this girl. She's just an innocent pawn trapped in the nightmare of her "father"'s egomania.

    Katie only called her an amazing woman (vom) because she was brainwashed. Scientology is evil and they are behind all of this bullshit.

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