I wanted to give everyone a chance to weigh in on the whole Safeway incident in Hawaii. I have watched it over the past couple of news cycles and have come to the conclusion that the manager at Safeway is an idiot.
If you have not heard the story, here is the quick version. Couple moves from California to Hawaii a couple of weeks ago. Get lost on their way to buy groceries. Find a Safeway. While in the store they eat a sandwich. The total cost of the sandwich? $5. They save the plastic to scan when they pay for the groceries. The couple pays for $50 worth of groceries. They forget to pay for the sandwich. After they go through the checkout line they are stopped, hauled off to the manager's office and the police called. The couple is with their 3 year old daughter. The police show up, arrest the couple and child welfare takes their daughter away from the couple for the next 18 hours.
Here is my problem with the whole thing. This would have been completely different if the couple did not buy any groceries and tried to steal a sandwich. The thing is they ate it in open sight, paid for the rest of the groceries and forgot to pay for the sandwich. Lets say though they did intend to steal the sandwich. Does Safeway need to send both of them to jail? Why not just one parent so the other can stay with the two year old? When the manager saw child welfare services come in, they could have stopped the whole thing at least for one parent, but they did not. They were perfectly fine with the child being taken away from the parents. So, now Safeway has the entire world hating them and a PR disaster for which there really is no recovery because no matter what they do, people will remember them for this.
I hope they sue, this is something that could happen to anyone. The poor child.
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ReplyDeleteHUGE over reaction by Safeway. seems like it was an honest mistake. that poor kids was probably scared to death!
ReplyDeleteThis is the first I've heard of it. I can't believe they'd do that to someone. What they're putting the child through, just to make a point over five bucks, is horrible. Even if they did it on purpose this is still going overboard (though I can see how it could happen, and doubt they meant to).
ReplyDeleteBummer - I get my gas at Safeway to save a few bucks. I don't know that I can afford to protest, but I'll check out other gas prices. I spend as much money on gas as I do on food, practically.
There have been several times that I've gotten so parched while grocery shopping that while waiting in line, I opened one of the refrigerated bottles that they have just sitting there while you wait. I have always made sure to pay for it, but if I happen to forget one day, I'd expect the cashier to gently remind me - not to have me arrested. I can imagine that if I were shopping with a three-year-old, I'd be a little more scatter-brained than when I'm shopping by myself.
ReplyDeletewhy could they not have just said said "hey you forgot to pay for the sandwich, you owe us 5 bucks"
ReplyDeletei'm sure they would have apologized for the oversight, paid it, and gone about their business
Technically they are within their rights to do this, but it strikes me as applying the letter rather than the spirit of the law. See also the stories you hear about 90 year old women being asked to prove they're old enough to buy booze.
ReplyDeleteThis is INSANE.
ReplyDeleteMaybe the parents overreacted when they were pulled aside, though? I totally understand being outraged by accusations of shoplifting -- especially if you've already paid fifty bucks -- but I can also see a manager calling the cops if, say, the father were to threaten violence towards store personnel. If they moved from Cali to Hawaii, chances are good these people have money to burn, and sometimes indignant, privileged people act like absolute twats. Ask anyone who's dealt with customer service for a living.
I don't mean to play devil's advocate (because I honestly HATE that), but this situation is so extreme that it just makes me wonder about the underlying circumstances.
Adding to this story - the mother is about 30 weeks pregnant and needed the sandwich because she was feeling lightheaded. So add in pregnancy brain too, in forgetting to pay for the sandwich.
ReplyDeleteAgree that Safeway went way too far with this by calling the police. That being said, I think the police who actually arrested the parents are really to blame - don't tell me they couldn't have resolved this situation quickly and without escalating it to where we are today.
This is an outrage! I've done this myself and it could easily happen to anyone. I vote the manager is a complete dick with power issues!
ReplyDeleteAdd this bit to it: The store personnel waited until they passed through the doors to stop them. The store policy says they will not accept payment for any "stolen goods" once the perp has left the building. So their attempts to pay, and they did offer, were flatly denied.
ReplyDeleteThey had no intention on resolving the situation, just making examples out of the couple. 30 weeks pregnant too.
I have a problem with eating food at a grocery store. I would never do that. That said, a simple conversation between the manager and the family would have sufficed. I wonder how experienced and "mature" that manager is. Sounds like he over-reacted BIG TIME.
ReplyDelete@ Ida, I think they're military. From what I read they offered to pay as soon as they got pulled aside and the manager refused to accept the money because of some inane other policy.
ReplyDeleteGod I hate beaurocrats (however you spell that).
This doesn't make me think poorly of Safeway, though. Just the store manager who was clearly on a power trip of some kind.
ReplyDeleteOkay. She was PREGNANT?
ReplyDeleteWell then, I totally don't care if they DID throw a bratty, freaky, hissy fit. For the love of GOD. You don't take a knocked-up lady into custody! I hope someone gets his ass fired over this, honestly.
Also, why didn't the checkout person say something? Having worked retail, I know the rules, but there are gentle ways of suggesting that a potential shoplifter pay for an item before he leaves the premises.
I think the rule is that once you leave the store it's considered stealing. Remind me never to go to Safeway because I like to test the grapes before I buy them.
ReplyDelete@Fiesty -- Gotcha. That would make sense. And I know military families aren't exactly swimming in dough. :-/
ReplyDeleteDamn, Safeway. Over-reaction, much? I doubt the couple meant to swipe a sandwich. If they were going to pay for their other items, it's reasonable to think not paying for the sandwich was an oversight.
ReplyDeleteSafeway is so going to lose business over this. All that drama for a Lincoln note.
The CBS article made me cry. Can you imagine having child welfare take your baby away from you over something this ridiculous?? And add to the mix being 30 weeks pregnant? That is disgusting and I hope Safeway gives them a big, fat, expensive apology.
ReplyDeleteThe other part that I thought was awful is the mom says when CPS came for the child, she and her husband were careful not to get really upset so as to not upset the little girl more.
ReplyDeleteAnd then once the baby was taken out of the room, the mom became hysterical and vomited. What kind of asshole sees all of that and decides to continue to press charges against both?
They made their $50 bail (or some really low number) and then had to basically wander/walk back home. They didn't get there until midnight. I hope the manager is fired already.
i guess every one (the shop,police and the people ) are overreacted but in France during this spring,a woman was arrested by the police because her 2 year old kid "stole" a 3 Euros($4,5) book in a book shop(it's the politic of the shop)
ReplyDeleteI go both ways - when I'm PMS'ing I think... if you are going to take advantage of the fact the there *is* food in the supermarket that can be eaten without the need for cooking, scissors to open the package, etc... then don't be a fuggin scatterbrain. It's like, how can you be not scatterbrained enough to think you'll eat a sandwich as you walk through the supermarket, but then 5 min later be so scatterbrained that you cant remember to pay for it? It's allowed, doesn't mean it's a right. There is too much dumb in the world, if this keeps one person from using the scatterbrained excuse, fine.
ReplyDeleteThis is lunacy.
ReplyDeleteFirst of all grocery shopping with the kid prompts major adult ADD. I know this from first-hand experience. Second, the woman was knocked up. That's probably why she ate the sandwich. I'm surprised the police or someone on the scene didn't try to stop this craziness.
you arent supposed to eat something that you havent paid for in the first place. Did safeway overreact? probably...but they could have easily went up to the deli counter and paid for the sandwich before consuming it. I've done that before..pay for a sandwich or soda so I can eat/drink it while doing my shopping. I dont understand why people consume products that they havent purchased...technically that IS stealing, and a bad example for kids.
ReplyDeleteI don't know. The idea that we can see them literally forgetting to pay on a security video? I don't think "forgetting to pay" is an identifiable visual phenomenon. Of course the store overreacted, and of course people are angry, but I'm not angry in the least. I've been stopped by store security before, had my things gone through, had receipts verified against the contents on four occasions in my long life, and it bugged me, but it's part of life. The store did not take the child from the parents, I would also like to point out. But for the parents' actions, this incident would not have occurred.
ReplyDeleteChiming in late to this one.
ReplyDeleteSorry, but I don't get the people who are defending Safeway or the manager. As I'm reading the comments, the only thing I can think to say in reply is wonder if you have never been pregnant nor shopped with a toddler. You are scatterbrained when shopping. It's for reason likes these that I try to avoid going grocery shopping whenever possible with my kids (one who is 3).
And to top it all off they are serving our country? Do you know what that means to these folks? There will also be ramifications from their (his) commanding officer than can result in something much worse happening. Truly a tragedy for not thinking with your heart.
ReplyDeleteShe is 30 weeks pregnant, got on the wrong bus and got lost. They were or still are a military family, so they are not rich. Ate one of two $2.50 sandwiches in open sight and left the wrapper in the cart in open sight. Paid for groceries, got arrested, child hauled off that had never spent a night away from them, paid $50 bail a piece. Got their groceries from the store and WALKED HOME after all of this. Safeway also owns Tom Thumb in the Texas area if you want to not give them any of your money. I sure as heck won't.
ReplyDeleteI'm in the group of, pay for the food at the deli counter if you are going to eat it while walking around the store. (Or in the mother's case, needed to eat something.) What was the rush that they couldn't have taken the time to do so? Hell, they could have gotten and paid for a snack for the kid, too, while they were at it, which would have helped their shopping experience with her, too.
ReplyDeleteI've been pregnant, twice, and I go shopping now with two kids regularly who are now 2 and 5. Like a few other posters, I too don't like to eat food while in the store that I haven't yet paid for. It can be done, people. Really.
They came from California to Hawaii. It's not like they came from a country with completely different customs (though I'd be hard pressed to believe that other countries would be so blase' about allowing you to eat the merchandise before paying for it, too).
I'm sick of the justification logic of "the intent to pay" after the fact. I intend to to a lot of things, doesn't mean they happen. And I have a hard time believing that the Safeway was so different looking over there, that they couldn't figure out where the deli counter was. They even have debit card machines there too, you know.
Sorry, I'm with Barton Fink on this.
Yes they could have and should have paid for the sandwich at the deli counter if she really was that lightheaded (and I believe she could have been). I really dislike seeing people eating products they haven't purchased yet in a grocery store. That said, the store manager and the police completely overreacted. I also hope they receive 'an expensive apology' from Safeway.
ReplyDeleteI don't know about Safeway, but none of the food stores I go to have cashiers anywhere except at the front of the store.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.tbd.com/blogs/market-report/2011/06/gay-couple-involved-in-safeway-incident-say-they-won-t-sue-11437.html
ReplyDeleteSafeway got in trouble earlier in the year, too.
This reminds me of Jean Valjean getting twenty years for stealing a loaf of bread for his starving little niece. We need more bishops in this society and fewer Javerts!
ReplyDeleteI know they weren't starving but damn, cut them a break and let them pay before you go all Cops in Hawaii on the family!
I'm with the people that won't eat anything in the store Ihaven't already paid for. It's too easy to go through the 10 items or fewer line and pay for something and stick the receipt in my pocket. I do it all the time. And if the wrapper was in the cart, why didn't they notice it when they were putting their stuff on the counter?
ReplyDeleteAs for the forgetting it excuse, I don't know if it's true or not in this case but can you imagine how many times stores hear that line from people who have shoplifted?
ITA w/ M. If she felt that funny, she should have bought the sandwich, sat down and ate it. Then she could have grocery shopped. However, I agree that it appears the store manager was on a power trip and couldn't wait to harass these people.
ReplyDeleteI'm not going to boycott Safeway because of this. I shop at Safeway all of the time and get the best service. This, in my opinion, is really a manager issue - and yes I think he went too far.
ReplyDeleteMany times I have not been charged for the case of water that I had placed under the cart on the bottom. When I realize that they didn't charge me I have them ring it up separately. I've even made it out to my car and realized that they didn't charge me and went back in and paid for it - or have been told not to worry it was their fault.
I think most of us realize that technically, the couple was wrong to eat the sandwich without paying. But did the punishment fit the crime? Absolutely not. Hauling off both parents and leaving a 3-year-old with CPS is overkill, IMO. There was a better way to handle this before it become a PR nightmare for the company.
ReplyDeleteTo all those saying she should have paid at the deli, per the article the register at the deli was closed. RTFA!
ReplyDeleteSorry but having a background in loss prevention I wouldve stopped them too. I worked for a large grocery store/ retailer and you wouldnt believe how much people eat without paying. Or drink! I stopped a lady once for opening a coke, taking a drink , and putting it back in the cooler. How would u have liked to buy this?!?! I never prosecuted but it was the principal of the thing. Maybe she should've given it to her husband to buy.
ReplyDeleteLori said...
ReplyDeleteyou arent supposed to eat something that you havent paid for in the first place. Did safeway overreact? probably...but they could have easily went up to the deli counter and paid for the sandwich before consuming it. I've done that before..pay for a sandwich or soda so I can eat/drink it while doing my shopping. I dont understand why people consume products that they havent purchased...technically that IS stealing, and a bad example for kids.
I concur. So what if she is pregnant. That is a really stupid excuse. But, I hope the manager gets fired because he is a complete turd.
If she was feeling light headed and that pregnant and then proceeded to vomit her pregnancy could end up in jeopardy.
ReplyDeleteMaybe nine of you have had difficult pregnancies while you had an active toddler but I have had to sit down in the middle of a store while holding my toddlers pants because I was so light headed. I grabbed whtever food was around and ate it, then paid. If anyone would have given me shit about it I would have called my dr and had her office explain my situation.
It may be technically stealing to eat in a grocery store but if the intent is to purchase then i see no harm. As a previous poster stated, many times stores forget to charge you for water or other things under your cart. Technically you stole those if you left the building before realizing hou weren't charged.
What if the family had a rack of waters under their cart and they were not charged for it (did the checker forfet or was it the buyers responsibility to point it out, repeatedly?) The
manager waited until they walked through the doors and
the same results ensued. Would the defenders be singing
the same tune??
The situations are not that different. In my home Safeway they would be nice, remind me, and i would pay.they would then probably put it in my car for me and give my kids Lilly pops.
Maybe the checker has some culpability? There was half a sandwich left, why did the checker not add it to the total??
The manager is an a$$ and the police and maybe even the checker. The whole thing is ludacris and people need to be kind and understanding.
If i had been behind then, i would hve piped up and said i was paying for the dang sandwich!
This poor family.
ReplyDeleteAnd honestly, I've eaten food that I will pay for in the checkout at least three times in my life. When I'm starving. It's never been a problem. And this poor pregnant woman?
Agree this is a manager issue. As in, he sucks.
Layna Day said...
ReplyDeleteI think most of us realize that technically, the couple was wrong to eat the sandwich without paying. But did the punishment fit the crime? Absolutely not. Hauling off both parents and leaving a 3-year-old with CPS is overkill, IMO. There was a better way to handle this before it become a PR nightmare for the company.
I totally agree Layna
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ReplyDeleteThe Safeway manager was a total dick. Glad to see the nazi guard mentality is alive with some of y'all too.
ReplyDeleteI dunno. I have certainly FELT like I was starving while grocery shopping but I have NEVER eaten something while in the grocery store.
ReplyDeleteI dont know if the sins of one lone Hawaiian Safeway will cause Safeway's nationwide to suffer. It's not like what is done in Hawaii is nationwide policy and procedure.
ReplyDeleteI have eaten a grocery store sandwich once, when I had a huge list of stuff to buy and hadn't had time to eat earlier in the day & thought I might faint/vomit if I didn't eat something. I kept the box on top of my purse & just paid with the rest of my stuff. The cashier didn't bat an eyelash when I explained what I'd done.
ReplyDeleteI understand the need to stop the couple, of course, b/c people probably do lie all the time about stuff like this, but calling CPS was the part that crossed the line. Why couldn't the police handle this??
Shame on that manager & shame on all of you judging without knowing what was really going on! Before parenthood, I used to get so annoyed with "those people" who let their kids whine in the grocery store. After, I realized how absent minded you can be about such things when all you want to do is focus on getting out of there with everything you need.
ReplyDeleteEver been pregnant? Absent mindedness comes with it. Not to mention major life changes (moving) & getting lost looking for the damn store in a new city.
So you know for SURE there was a freakin' cashier at the deli? I think some people just want to be contrary. (Elvis-lippy snarl)
Ok, so if you know that being pregnant and with a toddler is going to cause you to be absentminded, then you should know not to consume something that does not belong to you, because you might forget to pay for it. BTW, I hate this argument because, seriously, if pregnancy makes women that absentminded, why WOULD men trust us enough to hold important political offices while we are still in our childbearing years? In addition, I assume the husband was not pregnant and therefore not suffering from this absentmindedness. He could have taken the sandwich to a cashier and paid for it before it was consumed.
ReplyDeletePerhaps the store overreacted, but people who take things that do not belong to them increase the cost for everyone else.
This is the first I've heard of this story. I live in Hawaii and moved here from California- I am definitely not rich. I haven't had a chance to see the other reports with finer details, but from what I've read here + in the comments, I can offer a different point of view- locals do not like military. Not in the least. They are not particularly fond of anyone who can fit into the haole category, but they especially despise people here who are in the military. Not sure if that played a role, but it is a possibility.
ReplyDeleteIt was a SANDWICH. The parents bought 50$ of groceries. The store clerk waited until the family was out the door to confront them. The cops arrested the parents. A 3 yr-old girl was traumatized. Over a sandwich. The cops and store personnel are insane.
ReplyDeleteThis is horrible! OMG, people who go by the book and use little to no common sense or compassion are what's wrong with the world.
ReplyDeleteThere was a very simple resolution for this costing no more than $5. I'll bet this incident cost the taxpayers thousands of dollars and it caused so much grief - not to mention spreading anger, because anyone with a heart would be pissed off after reading this.
And the rules in this instance - inane. People like this store manager are very useful in totalitarian, oppressive societies, but I didn't think that's what we were supposed to have here in the U.S.
THANK YOU, @Tara17!
ReplyDelete@b... WHY do they hate military? You left that part out.
Feline made an excellent point about how some men (and hell, some women) are still skeptical of a female's ability to deal with her pregnancy and simultaneously hold office. I agree that pregnancy can't be used an excuse for total absentmindedness. I imagine it must be a woozy and disconcerting experience sometimes, but It's too much of a slippery slope. I don't think it can/should be used as an excuse in this circumstance.
ReplyDeleteTHAT SAID, I also agree with Tara17 in that the "stolen" item in question was just a damned SANDWICH -- not a bottle of wine or anything remotely expensive, so this whole situation seems more petty than anything.
And, yes, why the hell was CPS involved in the first place? I know Hawaii is paradise, but *surely* some kid on that island could have actually used their assistance that night?
This whole thing confuses me. So there were two sandwiches? If the wife ate one, what happened to the second one? It wasn't paid for so it wasn't in the cart. I can understand one person forgetting to pay, but both of them? The dad was there and pregnancy didn't affect his brain.
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure why they were both arrested? Couldn't only one person be charged with shoplifting the sandwich? Or, was the husband accused of stealing the other sandwich?
How the hell can anyone justify what the fools at that Safeway did?
ReplyDeleteThey waited until they left the store to confront them about not paying for the sandwich. Wtf? Why not remind them before they left to pay? And when they did confront them, they cause this whole fucking scene for no reason at all.
And fuck the cops too for not being real cops and seeing the situation for what it really was.
Many interesting things in this discussion -- and I gotta say: One reason I love CDAN is that even when we all vigorously disagree with each other, we're pretty polite about it. In fact, I can see both sides pretty well and I have total sympathy for the couple, but I think my years in retail as a young person have set my personality in loss-prevention mode. Maybe I'm wrong, who knows. Like I said before, once you make a call in a situation like this, it's very very hard to backtrack and tell the police to forget about it.
ReplyDeletehow is it people can shoplift things like $300 jeans or $500 worth of electronics and the police do NOTHING in some places, but at this particular location, the police actually make an arrest for a $5 sandwich? if i was a tax payer in that area i would be PISSED that the police would actually show up for a $5 sandwich. pathetic.
ReplyDeleteI feel bad for the little girl, that she was traumatized like that. But still, they should have paid before hand. It really isn't that big of a deal. Just because you are pregnant, it doesn't make you an invalid. My mother had to manage four young girls and she never did things like that. We were not allowed to eat anything until we had paid for it.
ReplyDeleteI believe it when they say they forgot, but maybe they are just being set as an example. How many times have you seen someone eat something and put the wrapper on the shelf and not buy it? I have seen it both working in retail and as a customer.
Businesses have to make up for the losses somehow and they pass it onto the consumer.
If Safeway says oh well it's just $5 then everybody will have that attitude. 50 cents or $50, is still stealing.
Wow...this has been an interesting discussion to read.
ReplyDeleteWhen I was pregnant, especially during the 1st trimester, I would suddenly need to eat something right away. My (ex) husband said it was in my head, but my OB/GYN said it was morning sickness, and my way of dealing with it. This never happened when I was at the grocery store, but the idea of grabbing something, walking across a giant store to stand in line and wait to pay, then eat it (hopefully) before I pass out is frankly, ridiculous.
These people offered to pay. Why not take their money and be done with it? They just spent $50 with you; the woman is obviously pregnant, has a small child...maybe this cashier was bored and wanted some action, and the manager is some early-20s jerk with no wife or kids to soften his no-tolerance stance...who knows? To the person who agrees with this action, but stated that s/he had made it to the car with a case of water that wasn't paid for...you returned to the store and paid. Good for you. These people weren't offered that chance, and if you had been shopping at that particular store, you would have been arrested and hauled to jail, had to bail yourself out...seriously. This can't be a more ridiculous situation, and the store manager should be at most discharged, at least sent to common sense training.
Oh wait...common sense can't be taught. What a shame.
@ Kraymond19 sorry for the delay, just now came back to read comments...
ReplyDeleteLocals feel as though everyone has come and taken and abused their land and tainted what is theirs. They especially see military people as disrespectful and a threat to their land and culture. That is not to say that all locals feel this way, but the vast majority does. I'm white and luckily have many local friends, but I regularly hear 'I hate haoles... well, except for you' (I was raised on the east coast and regularly heard my white friends say the same 'well, except for you' thing to my black friends... it always stung to hear when directed at them, and it is bizarre to now experience for myself) It's based on stereotypes, as most prejudices are-there is some truth to it, but it is obviously not true of everyone who is not of Polynesian descent.
I have seen and heard of many cases of people specifically targeting military guys to fight, cause trouble for, or make an example of. There is a lot of underlying racial tension here- all races included
@ Kraymond19 sorry for the delay, just now came back to read comments...
ReplyDeleteLocals feel as though everyone has come and taken and abused their land and tainted what is theirs. They especially see military people as disrespectful and a threat to their land and culture. That is not to say that all locals feel this way, but the vast majority does. I'm white and luckily have many local friends, but I regularly hear 'I hate haoles... well, except for you' (I was raised on the east coast and regularly heard my white friends say the same 'well, except for you' thing to my black friends... it always stung to hear when directed at them, and it is bizarre to now experience for myself) It's based on stereotypes, as most prejudices are-there is some truth to it, but it is obviously not true of everyone who is not of Polynesian descent.
I have seen and heard of many cases of people specifically targeting military guys to fight, cause trouble for, or make an example of. There is a lot of underlying racial tension here- all races included
None of us know the true intent of the parents. I know (and despise) people who lie and steal. Do you think that when they are caught stealing that they admit to stealing? No. Instead they make up a story, like a child would when caught getting a cookie from the cookie jar after being told not to get a cookie.
ReplyDeleteAgain, I do believe the store overreacted, but I am shocked at the number of people who responded that it could happen to anyone. It only happens if you consume / take something that you don't own from the grocery store without paying. We have all been in a situation where a cashier for some reason does not charge us for an item, so that we have to say, "did you get this?" or otherwise remind them. That is the right thing to do, and, since the story says that the parents kept the wrapper in order to pay, I would think it would have been pretty prominent in the cart after removing all other items. How could both parents just "forget" to pay for it?
Does not seem logical to me.
They dropped the charges.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/45128140/ns/us_news-weird_news/