Monday Night Television - Two And A Half Men, Dancing With The Stars, Charlie Sheen Roast, Real Housewives

I have to tell you that I cannot remember the last time I was juggling so many channels at once and not doing it just to hear my mom complain. My dad never complains because he is the worst offender of channel surfing. Even I can't watch television with him. Last night though there was so much to see and it was all on in the same time frame. I had separate DVR's running so I could catch everything.

The things I was actually trying to watch were Two And A Half Men, Dancing With The Stars, Real Housewives and the Charlie Sheen roast. Oh, and the end of a really boring football game. Seriously NFL? You thought the Rams would make for good primetime television.

Two And A Half Men - It was a lot of jokes you could see coming from a mile away and some bad acting by Ashton Kutcher. I thought the opening was a bit harsh, and Chuck Lorre let his emotions get the best of him rather than be just a writer. The only reasons I felt my time was worth it was to find out that Dharma and Greg were still together (barely) and John Stamos who was really funny.

Charlie Sheen Roast - Better than Two And A Half Men and funnier. Two best lines of the night were, "You are just like Bruce Willis. You were big in the '80s, and now your old slot is being filled by Ashton Kutcher." The other one I loved was "Charlie Sheen's nostrils are so snotty and full of coke that he calls them the Hilton sisters." It is worth watching a repeat if you can find it.

Dancing With The Stars - I don't think I remember a season having all the contestants all bunched up. I think Ron Artest or whatever he is calling himself is out the door which is too bad because he is the only one who will probably give his earnings to charity. I would rather see Rob Kardashian out the door because I still don't understand why he is on the show. The Kardashian clan is slowly tipping the pendulum from annoying or irritating to get them the f**k out of my life. It is just too much, too often and I'm sick of it. Did you think Elisabeta Canalis would do so awful? For some reason I thought because she is Italian and good looking that it would translate into being a good dancer. I was wrong. I don't know if it was that she was so bad or that I had higher expectations for her so she looked worse than she was. No, she was horrific. Guess George Clooney liked something more about her than her dancing. Chaz did pretty well. He is not going to win but I thought he would be the worst of the night. He was safely in the middle of the pack which means he should be ok for four or five weeks. Plus, half the audience that watches the show probably remembers when he was a kid and would show up on Sonny and Cher's television show so that is worth a few votes.

Real Housewives Beverly Hills - Did any of you watch it thinking of what Taylor has been accused of doing? It kind of put a big spin on everything for me and made me distrust her even more. I still am thinking she was abused just because of Russell's history, but it is so tough to believe anything she says or feel sorry for her when she is having a breakdown. Adrienne does not seem to have people skills. I think deep down she is a kind person, but she does not know how to deal with others or always react with the appropriate emotion. Kyle is turning into the most self centered person on earth. I am really seeing where Paris gets it. Someone is having a nervous breakdown and Kyle is mad that it is intruding on her vacation. Pure Paris. As for Camille, well she was Camille. I think hiding in her room was her way of making sure she did not do or say something which would make her look bad. Kim? Well, she is obviously not better and I can't decide if shaming her on national television with her drinking issues is better for her or if she should just get help and avoid the spotlight for awhile. She is clearly not doing well. What was she saying on the phone? She loves planes and is going to wear a ponytail and she does it up the butt for coke? Oh, wait sorry. Had a flashback to her niece.