Much is being made of the fact that NEXT Model Management just signed Ali Lohan, or as she prefers to be called, Aliana T. Lohan. Uh huh. Yeah, we will stick with Ali, or Lindsay Lohan's little sister. Anyway, suddenly now she is a model. Just because you sign with an agency does not mean they can get you work. NEXT also reps Miranda Kerr. Do you really think Ali is going to be asked for the same things as Miranda Kerr? The two of them are worlds apart. NEXT seems to think that Ali will be a fashion icon. I want everyone to know I wish her well and I think that anything that gets her away from the clutches of Lindsay and Dina on a consistent basis is great. If she starts making some coin, then Michael can like her again and Dina can forgive that entire reality show mess. I think Ali is cute, but I do not think she is Miranda Kerr or other NEXT clients like Milla Jovovich or Jamie King. NEXT can send Ali out for a million things, but someone is going to have to want her. NEXT says they did not hire Ali for her famous last name but of course mention that in their press release. I think they are banking on that last name and want their commission and then Dina will take hers, and whatever money Ali leaves lying around in her purse goes to Lindsay.
OK, well if you put yourself out there as model, you allow your looks to be criticized, so I am going to feel ok about saying that she is the only teenager I've ever seen with sun damage in her armpit.
ReplyDeleteIs she under 21? Enty, doesn't that mean that Dina gets first access to her money as her guardian? Probably as her manager, anyway. They'll shop her around Europe.
ReplyDeleteIn this celebrity obsessed world, she'll get some work. She does look better since her nose job, but I don't find her face that interesting.
ReplyDeleteI feel sorry for Aliana (we should use it, it's a nice name, and most of us revert to our birth names at some point, says this former "Nikki"), I thought she was going to college. She might of had a chance, if she had proved she was different than the rest of the family. Or maybe this is the only way she can cover her tuition?
Dina must have blackmail pictures of someone at NEXT.
ReplyDeleteYeah, she's worlds away from Miranda Kerr because Miranda is a 5'11", gloriously-dimpled, buxom, leggy, genetic FREAK.
ReplyDeleteUmmm. I'm not gonna rag on a teenager's looks -- and I actually think Ali is a pretty girl in the way that her sister USED to be pretty -- but she is NOT model material, sorry.
And I know I'll get snarked at for saying so, but I actually DO think that Jenner child is model-beautiful -- she's also got that coltish build that teenage models tend to have, whereas Ali just looks already too womanly for the industry. Might be the funbags White Oprah gave her for her birthday or something. I dunno.
She can be hired as a SPOKESMODEL for something, but I don't foresee her in an upcoming Allure editorial or anything like that.
I hope that when she turns 18 she makes like the Bean and ditches her cray cray mother.
ReplyDeleteMe, I feel sorry for her. That family UGH !, She needs to get away from them....if she makes it Lindsay will not be happy.
ReplyDeleteHow fucking thrilled is Dina Lohan today? Another meal ticket. I suppose it's not like Ali was going to school anyway. I'm so disgusted by this family.
ReplyDelete@Ida Blankenship you are waaaaaaaaay classier than I as I will unequivocally say that Ali Lohan has a damn fug face. I've never seen an angle that worked for her. She looks like a 35-year-old divorcée. I'm sorry, not a model.
ReplyDeleteI wish someone would step in and actually parent the poor girl. It's horrible to know that her mother is just pushing the girl into anything as her meal ticket. It's obvious exploitation, if not mental cruelty. Where's Child Protective Services when you need 'em?
I hear Chico's needs a new spokesmodel. I think the curious case of Ali Lohan (MK@Dlisted) would be perfect for that.
ReplyDeleteQ. would I hire her
ReplyDeleteA. No
I agree with Miranda. Way to make a teenager look like she's on the brink of menopause!
ReplyDeleteHORRIBLE PICTURE, looks like she should be on Rupauls show... sorry.. probably signed for a moments publicity... I never heard of NEXT.. but that means nothing.. and again, HOW MANY MODELS ARE WITH EACH AGENCY? Probably hundreds, at least. Doesnt mean you are going to make a career, never mind a full time job out of it.. I am from Long Island and would, years ago, run into women, men, who said they were models.. and it was not for runway, etc. but occaissional newspaper ads, or in store event, AND NOT BIG EVENTS AT ALL.
ReplyDeleteI also thought she should be on RuPaul's show! I bet she'll be modeling in Japan and the Middle East real soon.
ReplyDeleteI would for my women's collection at Macy's.
ReplyDeletepoor girl. doesn't have even the teeniest bit of a chance. that idiot mother of theirs will ruin any good thing that might ever come her way.
ReplyDelete@Miranda - thank you, just what I was thinking. I hate to take swipes at a kid but the fact is, she looks old old old. Not mature....old.
ReplyDeletePut her on a season of ANTM and see what Andre Leon-Talley says! I don't think he'd put her picture in his salon!
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad I'm not the only one that thinks she just looks old. The sun damage to her skin is terrible already. I half expect the next picture to have her holding a Camel cigarette and a glass of whiskey.
ReplyDeleteHopefully this is a step closer to Ali separating herself from the Lohan clan by getting a little more freedom/life experience, on her own.
ReplyDeleteI do not think she is as pretty as Lindsey WAS but I guess she could do some catalog work (ouch) or something.
If it helps her to get away from the chaotic storm of Lindsay and Dina then I say more power to her!
@BigMama can you imagine how adorable she'd be if she wiped off the makeup, wore age-appropriate clothes, laid off the substance abuse, and just has a chance to act like a kid?
ReplyDeleteSigh. I sound like my mother.
I agree with Ms. Snarky. Poor Ali/Aliana has never stood a chance with parents like hers. Poor kid. She's probably dying to get away from that freak show. I know I would be. If modeling can help her make money to support herself, more power to her. Just hope White Oprah doesn't get her grubby hands on too much of Ali's dough.
ReplyDeleteShe's nowhere in Miranda Kerr's league--few are. But Ali should be able to get some smaller contracts. There are a lot of boutique labels that would love the exposure that signing her would bring. Just keep her away from the Joan Collins in her Dynasty heyday clothes and jewelry! Honestly, poor girl looks like she should be catfighting Alexis in a pool in dazzling Denver circa 1986.
she is NOT pretty AT ALL.
ReplyDeleteI swear, anyone can model these days. Rumer. Fucking. Willis.
enough said.
@Miranda - I agree. I think she might have had a chance but now she already has that hard look that comes with too much partying.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteToo late. The Lohan name is too much of a joke. Just the name elicits nothing but snickers these days.
ReplyDeleteEven if she does find some success in modeling, her family will leech off of her and do whatever they can to hold her back from a decent life -- because that's how they roll.
ReplyDeleteShe does not have the making of a model. If she does model it will be very minimal.
ReplyDeleteThe best thing this girl can do is when she gets her first pay check is get a divorce lawyer to divorce from her parents so they can't touch her money.
The only way I'd hire her as a model is if I was putting together a K-mart Clearance Catalog and I needed a hand model.
ReplyDeleteI would love if she became incredibly more famous than her sister, but that's not going to happen. I hope I'm wrong, though. It's just that I caught a glimpse of that reality show she was on with her mother and...no. She should go to college or learn a trade. Then again, even a little modeling through a big agency might net her enough money to pay for tuition if her money-grubbing family can keep there hands off of it.
ReplyDelete"their".
ReplyDeleteI won't comment on her looks but I will say I would not hire her solely because she is a Lohan. Having to deal with Dina and/or Michael in any capacity would be a complete turn off for me.
ReplyDeleteFor the love of all things holy.... THAT is the best shot they came up with?? Look at the difference in color between her face and shoulders..... NEXT! Is what they will be shouting at each cattle call she goes on
ReplyDeleteI can safely say that with that skin she will not make it. Maybe on the face a little but they don't want freckly skin like that. And I think SHE wants to be famous like her sister. I really do. I don't think she wants to get away from mom at all. Hell Mom lets her do whatever she wants anyway.
ReplyDeleteNose job, check.
ReplyDeleteLip injections, check.
Airbrushing, check.
Strategically placed shadows, check.
What's not to love? Such a natural beauty. Hahahha