An Open Letter To Taylor Lautner
Dear Taylor,
Right now I am sure you are probably sitting outside in your garage looking at your new 2012 Mercedes SLS AMG. It is a fine automobile and I am sure some would say worth the $200K price tag. It was also a nice touch that you brought your parents along so they could try and haggle for you. You know, because it always feels good to get the dealer to come down from that $212K price tag down to $200K.
What kind of gas mileage do you get on that thing? Is that something that you are going to have to get premium gas for? Oh, sorry, where was I? Oh yeah. The reason I am writing you this is because I fear you should hang on to your money and not be spending it willy nilly on big purchases. Buy a house and pay cash. In fact, you can buy several of those. The car thing though? I want you to have a car. I just want to caution you that this big huge money train you are riding might come to a very quick end. I know you think people are going to hire you forever, but right now they are only hiring you because you bring the Twihards with you. After that is over, you are more likely to go the way of the boy band than the act which will continue delivering for the next 30 years. There are way more O-Towns in the world than there are Take That's.
I just don't want you sitting down at a Twilight convention 15 years from now selling autographed pictures for $20 and shirtless for $50 wondering where all the money went and all the attention and fame. Go buy your fun car, but try to leave it at just that one and when you feel like buying another, go watch yourself in Valentine's Day and ask yourself whether some acting lessons might not be a better investment.
Well, we'll know for sure soon enough, when his first post-Twilight films hit the big screen.
ReplyDeleteI have hopes for him -- he has a hell of a work ethic.
This no talent is getting 7 million a film....7 million.
ReplyDeleteInsane.....
And I think he has a pig face, but that's just me.
@Misch..no, no, it's actually not just you..we are at least two
ReplyDelete200K would pay off my mortgage and still leave me spare change to buy a new car.
ReplyDelete@Misch and @nataliesinger Make that three!
ReplyDeletei'm cheap and would never do that...but i don't begrudge anyone having a high-end luxury car after yrs and yrs of paying your dues in whatever chosen profession...but even then, only after you have the homes wherever it is you wish to have them, since they're the better investment...i seriously think this kid is still young and stupid enough to not get it that fame is fleeting...give it a little bit...the insurance premiums for a male that age and w/ a high end luxury car are insane (ask timbaland, and the costs incurred w/ his teen son's lambo...he's pretty vocal about it)...not to mention the upkeep...those (minimum!) $200 oil changes are going to get annoying after a while...and that's w/o the 6,000 mile service chkup...and lets not discuss the depreciation that begins the minute you drive it off the lot...*sigh*.
ReplyDeletedumbass.
gee Enty - your such a buzz kill LOL
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ReplyDeleteSound advice.
ReplyDeleteWow!!!! I just think that people are allowed to used their money whichever way they want, I don’t understand the judgment, at least he is not snoring or drinking his money, we should encourage clean teens to keep going that way.
ReplyDeleteOh Enty - how can you be so cruel? Don't forget, this isn't just about Team Jacob, this is Lava Boy we're talking about here. He's been a "major star" since he was a little kid. In H-wood, that's like dog years. He's already 104 years old - quit pickin'. OK, seriously? Some things have to be learned on your own. He can buy all kinds of possessions and still be fine. It's the entourages and hangers-on (including - or especially - family members) that drag those soon-to-be has-beens into oblivion and financial ruin.
ReplyDeleteO-town came on my pandora after reading this post...he has a chance! hahaha
ReplyDeleteGaudy.
ReplyDeleteI think that was pretty rough Enty. He did not buy a G5 or anything. Just one darn car. A nice one at that. It is a Mercedes, you cannot go wrong with this brand. I swear by them and drive the wheels off of them. I think the kid is pretty cute, worked his ass off to stay in the Twilight Series and seems to be a pretty decent human being as far as Hollyweird Types go. Yes, I agree he needs to buy a house and pay cash, especially in the down CA market right now. He could get a heck of a deal and it would be a wish investment. Here is hoping he has some good investments in place as well. : )
ReplyDeleteI see no problem with this. Let's say he makes a total of 7 million dollars just this year (although that's a very conservative guess - he's probably pulling in A LOT more than that). This $200,000 car is less than 3% of that amount. The average American household makes roughly $63,000 per year (and that's per household, not individual). So him buying this car is no worse than the average American household buying an $1800 car and paying for it in full.
ReplyDeletesign me up for the pig face club! that is one homely young man!
ReplyDeleteHAHAHAHA...."he's been a major star since he was a kid"....Um...he's still a kid and no he is no major star. Just got a lucky break on a role in a couple of the cheesiest, most terrible movies ever. NOT a major star at all.
ReplyDeleteI concur with Enty...this guy needs to rein it all in and splurge on some acting talent instead of expensive wheels he will only drive 5 times and then park in a garage because he's too scared he'll get a scratch on the paint.
I dunno... Guess I have to agree with those that say "splurge while you can..." If I had the chance to splurge a little (and 200k to HIM is a 40k car to ME) I would in a heartbeat. There's an Audi right now calling my name that I'd GLADLY trade in my lemon (I'm positive of it) Jetta in for.
ReplyDeleteHe's a kid. Leave him be for now.
Agreed he can do as he pleases with his own money, but I wonder how much delight he'll really get from that car in a year (or less) from now? I'll give Kristen Stewart credit for driving a Mini; hope she's got lots of cash stashed away.
ReplyDeleteWell, he's young, he's got people throwing a ton of money at him, and so far you haven't seen any pictures of him stumbling drunk out of a club or with powder on his nose. I'd rather see some young kid like him blow 200 grand on a car than stuffing it up his nose, like a lot of them do. Actually, I'd rather see a young kid give 200 grand to make a difference in the world, but I digress. At any rate, he's made a lot of money on a lot of films. He's splurging - a lot of people at any age would do the exact same thing. Hopefully his parents have hired good people to help him keep his finances straight and his future secure.
ReplyDeleteI thought the Twilight movies was this kids first job. Guess not. I have never seen one thing he's been in.
ReplyDeleteI guess with his turned up nose he could play young Michael Westen on Burn Notice in some flashback eps, but other than that I don't see his pull.
Maybe not a pig face, but definitely a "special needs" face. Oh well, hard to blame a young man for wanting a cool car. Hopefully, he's also salting some away in case the gravy train quits rolling.
ReplyDeletehe definitely has a snubbed pig nose
ReplyDeleteWelcome back, Enty! I missed your voice!
ReplyDeleteI think the fact he's waited this long to get himself a boy magnet car says a lot. I don't begrudge him.
ReplyDeleteHave fun cruisin'.... ;)
Considering all the pig face comments, maybe the money would be better spent on some surgery...probably tax deductible for his profession.
ReplyDeleteAdd me to the list that doesn't think he's attractive at all. I've always thought he looked likea young Randy Travis - and I think he's homely too.
ReplyDelete@Pookie, I'm giggling at your comment, "ask Timbaland." Ok. I'll text him. Seriously though, could you imagine sitting there, listening to your friend complain about the high price of insurance for their son's Lamborghini? Do you nod in agreement and then complain about the cost to fix the a/c in your ten year old Civic?
ReplyDeleteI'm with Enty. Those of you who say it's no big deal that he owns a 200,000 dollar car at age 18 need to remember that not even Paris Hilton had a car that cost that much at his age. If this was Paris there would be at least 50 comments saying what a waste it is.
ReplyDeleteAs for Taylor - my guess is that he's over-compensating. If you know what I mean.
Also Enty's right. I don't see this guy lasting beyond "Twilight." Robert Pattinson's non "Twilight" movies never made any money. Neither will this guy's This guy is too short to be a bona-fide Hollywood leading man. Sure he just made 7 million dollars for one movie. So did Lindsay back in 2005. And look what happened to her.
And from what I hear Taylor's father is a Dina Lohan in the making. Or at best - a Kit Culkin.
Give the kid a break. He has been working steadily since he was 11, he has never been in real trouble, hardly dates, seems to get along with everyone, no rumors of drug use or diva behavior. Let him have a little fun.
ReplyDeletePretty commonsensical advice from Enty.
ReplyDeleteMetallica said it best: you know it's sad but true. Or, in Hetfeldish, sad but truuuuuuuuuah.
@JasonBlueEyes
ReplyDeleteOn the contrary, Pattinson is the only one out of the three main Twi actors who's movie's have made money.
I actually don't see the big deal with Taylor buying himself the car, it's his money after all.
ITA Jason.
ReplyDeleteAnd I am still mystified that every teen actor/musician does this shit. Its like the minute you become a celeb you had in your reality card for a delusional card that blocks you from seeing the reality that very few people are able to keep and maintian their celeb worth and lifestyle.
Yes, it IS his money to do with what he wants BUT the way he is spending it screams delusional self importance and is idiotic. As Enty pointed out, for every one Justin Timberlake there are 100 people like that 98degrees boy bander who was headlining the Chipendales show in Vegas this last weekend. Uhhhh, the real world can suck and this kid should get to know the cold hard truth sooner rather than later.
*HAND in
ReplyDeleteMy open letter to Taylor Lautner just says, "Please go away."
ReplyDeleteAnd put me in the camp with those who don't find him attractive.
I don't want to hate on him, but Enty's right with the advice. Dumb car for a kid, get him in trouble. He needs a VW Beetle. :) And put me on the list of "would have to be falling down drunk and coming off five years of involuntary celibacy to consider him remotely attractive."
ReplyDelete$200,000?? I could build a better house, pay off my debts, buy my sister a touch screen computer and take her on vacation.
ReplyDeleteI need a drink. ---- I promise not to drive!!
Oh, no! It's the "big huge" thing all over again!
ReplyDeleteWell it is a nice car. ;) haha ;) Sound advice, Enty, but maybe Taylor has invested the rest of his money well....let's hope so! I agree that his shelf life isn't going to be forever.
ReplyDeleteI agree with other commentors. None of my business on how others spend the money that they make. It's like telling me to NOT buy a Chanel handbag.At least he's not doing lines or drinking away is money!
ReplyDeleteGlad you are back, Enty!
@MISCH I'm on the pig-face train with you. I've never understood his appeal and why he causes all this mass hysteria with the girls. If I saw him on the street I don't think I'd even give him a glance.
ReplyDeleteSince I have kids that age, it sort of creeps me out to even think if he's attactive or not, but I thought he was a lot cuter in the first movie with the long hair and before all the muscles.
ReplyDeleteAll kids that age splurge on a car when they have their first real jobs. Whether it's $12K or $200K. I think that's a stupid lot of money for a car, but he seems to have the money and it appears he's really earned it.
I much more concerned with his overbearing father than I am with Taylor splurging on a car. If the kid goes broke, Daddy Dearest is where I'll look.
ReplyDelete$200K is a lot for a car. But people will give Taylor pass over Paris because to this point, he hasn't fallen out of a limo while showing us his cooter, nor has been revealed as a STD-carry racist who abuses his pets.
This is a dream car. And we've all had dreams. Taylor has the means to fulfill his. No harm, no foul as long as he doesn't start a car collection.
So he is making 8 million for Breaking Dawn. This car costs 200k. 200k is 2.5% of that. If a kid was working at Taco Bell full time making 25k a year and spent $600 on a car would anyone accuse him of "wasting" his money? Its all perspective. There are plenty of cars that cost almost (and past) a million dollars that he could have bought. This is a relatively cheap indulgence.
ReplyDeleteIKR!!!
ReplyDeleteThe only thing I can think about now is the image of TL falling out of a limo, showing us his cooter.
ReplyDeleteGet.It.Out.Of.My.Head
there's such a huge gap between us and him. he make a lot of money with no responsibilities like family and keeping their stomachs full. he's a kid. my first job was $1.80 an hour and i used that money for a new pair of custom skate boots ($200). not 100% neccessary, but i loved my freestyle boots, and my my old, cheap boots used for figures were an embarrassment. i hated figures/patch.
ReplyDeleteand as an adult, i've driven sports cars since 30. i'd drive that sucker in a heart beat if i could justify the price tag for me and my family. in fact, bucket seats are the only place i can sit comfortably with my back. :)
Since the car will likely have collector value down the road, that and the fact that Lautner owned it may mean it will never depreciate. Provided he takes care of the car.
ReplyDeleteSo far the buzz on his big solo studio feature is pretty good...and never forget residuals. Those twilight films will be selling all over the world (and to all sort of TV in all sorts of markets) forever. He can live pretty well on those for a while longer, even if he takes the next couple years off. He's an ambitious (if not all that talented? jury's not out yet?) kid and life is full of possibilities, including TV if all else fails. So I'd give him a break - a $200,000 toy is chickenscratch for him right now.
ReplyDelete