Deena Is Lesbionic
On last night's episode of Jersey Shore, a new word was created called lesbionic. Apparently it is the word to describe women who are lesbians and is not a tribute to Lindsay Wagner and The Bionic Woman. I have to say I was pretty bored with last night's episode and I think the producers were just trying to put together pieces for next week when there will be multiple explosions.
Some things I noticed were The Situation and his twins they he thought he was going to have sex with. One of them was the same person he has been having sex with non-stop. The twins re American because obviously the Italians are not as impressed with him as he is with himself. The one twin certainly had no problems bouncing between Deena and Vinny but lucky for her she can always say it was her sister and not herself. "Me? No, I am not the person who messed around with Vinny and Deena. That was my sister. I am the virgin." Deena also had sex with some 14 year old waiter she picked up at a restaurant. He freaked out during the night and ran away as quickly as he could.
Ron and Sam got back together again and the only surprising thing about it is that they went the whole episode without fighting, but in the sneak for next week it looks like things are back to normal as Ron is on one of his roid rages and is shown throwing out what looks to be all her stuff.
The best part was when Snooki was working out and the owner of the gym decided to help out Snooki and got really close. Like so close she complained about his peen pressing into her.
She also claims that she and Mike have not had sex recently. What is she going to say? Is she going to tell her boyfriend she was smushing with Mike? Of course not. I think they had sex, but I don't know why Mike is making a big deal of it.
I also noticed he is really going downhill fast in the looks department. I can't tell who is looking worse, Mike or Jwowww. At this point they are not even showing Jwowww because she looks so bad, but Mike is not far behind. He looks 45. That is what two straight years of drinking and smoking non-stop will do to you. I think he also brought an entire suitcase filled with nothing but sneakers. So, in addition to looking like he is 45, he thinks he is 15.
The music I liked last night included Pance Party. Unfortunately for them, in addition to spelling woes they do not have a link to the song from the show last night so can't give them any extra love. I also really liked this song by Marc Robillard, called Blown Away. He has a Seann William Scott look about him. In my mind I see the song over highlight packages on American Idol or after a breakup. It is that kind of thing. Also for the second consecutive week they had a song by this Kate Crash person. I like this one way more than the one last week. It is called Generation Of The Bored. I even found a video for it although there is no audio for the first few seconds, I liked the concept.
whats with these tv show recaps? they are incredibly boring and leave me with the feeling that enty is in the networks pocket. sure he makes fun of the show but an entire recap? weird. also, lesbionic is not a new term my friends and i have been saying it for years.
ReplyDeleteLesbionic is not a new word.
ReplyDeleteThat is so not a new word.
ReplyDelete"Boring"?? Enty, my two girlfriends and I were squealing through that whole episode - it was epic!! We could not BELIEVE how skanky those twins were! With ZERO self-respect for themselves or how they were going to be viewed on tv.
ReplyDeleteAnd for those who watch...I have a poll: Snooki - did she cheat on Jionni with Mike or not? I say YES. She looks guilty as hell.
I say YES too. and I love the recaps! I have recently realized I like reading about TV, it gives it a different dimension somehow.
ReplyDeletefuck yes! Sitch is trying to break them up, i think he really does love lil Snook.
ReplyDeleteyes i watch - DON'T JUDGE.
oh and that is NOT a new word...MK has been saying it for years as well as most of my fave gays.
ReplyDelete@jax - I know, right? He seems all smitten with her n' shit! Why else would he have been ALL OVER HER every chance he got?
ReplyDeleteI love how Pauly said, "les-be-honest". I died. Also, I think Ronnie's rage was directed towards the Sitch and not Sammi. It was a good episode. Can't wait for next week.
ReplyDeleteI remember Howard Stern saying Lesbionic YEARS ago, I mean more than 10 years ago. Sorry I don't watch Jersey Shore-but for those of you who do, Enjoy!
ReplyDeleteAgree Sue Ellen. I think Sitch is sharing a room with Ronnie and it's HIS stuff he's throwing. At least I hope so. Honestly, Mike's got some payback coming.
ReplyDeleteYeah, "The Snituation" is about to encounter an ass-beating situation; I'm not violent myself, but I can see why Ronnie or somebody would finally snap on him for all of his shady escapades.
ReplyDeleteIt doesn't seem like the Italians in general are all that impressed with the Jersey Shore cast members; it ain't America, guys! But they let Snooki drive...?
Jwowww (or however it's spelled) and Mike both look like hell this season, too, and Mike's not the player he thinks he is.
Uh .. we said lesbionic back when I was in high school and that was 1979 to 1983. So not a new word. Sorry EL!
ReplyDelete@RQ and Jax - I find it really creepy the way Mike's acting. He stares at Snooki like he wants to hypnotize her into falling for him. It's a bit scary. I would not be surprised (sadly) if he attempted to force himself on her - get in her bed while she's sleeping. And I don't believe they had sex. Snooki is not a good liar and it would be obvious. I thought Snooki looked horrified and hurt that Mike would say things like that. And Ronnie was throwing Sitch's stuff, not Sam's.
ReplyDeleteWHYYY am I watching this?
I'm not a violent person either, but sometimes some people need a good smack (or cold cock as it appears Ron gave (gives?) the Sitch) to get things through their heads. He causes so many problems that it was bound to happen. Also, I am pretty sure on the scenes for next week, Jenni says something like she thought it was Ron and Sam, but it wasn't, then you see Ron and Sitch yelling.
ReplyDeleteThis show is a hilarious trainwreck laughfest.
@mngoddess - I think she looks horrified because he's TELLING people and she's about to get caught, but that's about it. In fact, I"m not sure she screamed at him that it wasn't true, only that he was an asshole and a psycho for saying it.
ReplyDelete@Robert - I agree that there is something NOTRIGHT about the Situation. Ronnie's a psycho too, though. Whatever. Let them both scrap it out for our entertainment.
And I totally agree about JWoww---wtf did she do to her face?? She looks like a surprised preying mantis now! So unnecessary.
Mike's face is falling pretty bad. Smoking makes one lose collagen and elasticity in their face much faster. The guy looks busted and tired all the time now. He looks like Jake Lamotta did when Lamotta was 50.
ReplyDeleteAnd yeah, he and Snooki absolutely smushed.
Yeeeeaaahhh, Buddy.
i think it was ron and sitch too... remember this: http://tinyurl.com/ronsituationfight
ReplyDeletehahahaha thanks jason blue eyes that was funny
ReplyDeleteAbout JWoww(wwwwwwwww) - I think she looks HORRIBLE this season but I think it is mainly due to the weight loss. She went on some kind of crazy diet and lost so much of her wowwwwww factor.
ReplyDeleteThe poorly applied bronzer does Jenny (easier to type) no favours. Of the four girls, Snookie looks the best. At leas her make-up is evenly applied. The other girls look so rough and haggard. Sammie gained weight. She looks good, she gained a lot in her chest. The Situation looks like he's 48. He looks like a creepy uncle.
ReplyDeleteThose twins were ridiculous. "We're twins." Really?
I don't think Snooki slept with Mike. She's pretty honest about her ways and Mike is known to lie. I should mention I didn't see last season so I could be missing context and nuances.
Gawker has thee best recaps. I don't watch this trash anymore due to too many fat jokes, but I do like reading Moylan's take on it.
ReplyDelete