I Really Dislike Jennifer Lopez
It is tough to say you hate someone, so let me just say that I really dislike Jennifer Lopez a great deal. A whole heap. Now I feel Jamaican. Better turn on some Bob Marley and get Lauryn Hill or pregnant.
Anyway, Jennifer Lopez is out running her mouth about how she cannot decide whether she is going to sign on for another season of American Idol. You know what I hope happens? I hope that the producers recognize it as a trick to get a raise from her obnoxious $12M a year and hire someone else. I hope they give a big f**k you to Jennifer Lopez and move on to the next fill in the blank judge.
You know why? Because unless Jennifer Lopez is a bigger idiot than I thought she would realize that the only reason her schedule is so busy is because of Idol. Jennifer says she was offered a movie for the first time in two years. Why? Idol. Jennifer had a song on the charts for the first time in forever. Why? Idol. If not for being on the show, Jennifer would be sinking quickly and the only time you would see her in public is when she is singing backup at a Marc Anthony concert. Seriously. This kind of crap is what ticks me off the most in Hollywood. She was given a ridiculous amount of money to do nothing and given all of this stuff that comes with it and does she say thank you? No, she craps on the producers and is delusional enough to think that she is busy because she is a talent. Jennifer, Jennifer, Jennifer. Everyone in this town has more talent than you. You and I both know they do. Plus, they are cheaper and nicer and a lot less of a pain in the butt.
I lump her in with the Kardashians and Lohan - just go away!
ReplyDeleteWell, there goes the modicum of respect I had for Lopez.
ReplyDeleteI have to say I have been watching The Voice since nothing else is on. And I have really been enjoying it. Christina is off her rocker but Adam and Cee-Lo give sound advice and mentoring to their teams.
They should just let American Idol die. It's like a 40 y/0 at a Prom looking for a date. It's just all sorts of wrong.
I liked her on the show! *ducks* I can't help it, she looked so pretty, and she was nice to the contestants. Maybe she does know that she is only busy because of Idol, but still, she's just making money while the making is good. I agree she should be more appreciative though.
ReplyDeleteIf she continues this, dump her and replace her with Gwen Stefani. I still wonder if she isn't that blind item about the singer who used a stand-in?
ReplyDeleteI liked her on the show too. Apparently she likes herself too much though.
ReplyDeleteThe Voice is waaaaay better than Idol.
Personally, I despise this twat because she's got an entire menagerie of animal corpses hanging in a closet that's surely the size of my whole entire house. So, really, I wish her NO happiness.
ReplyDeleteAnd say whatever you want about Kim K., but at least *her* ass took some of the attention away from MV...uh, I mean, J-Lo.
FURthermore, FUCK her for assuming that she should make as much -- or even more -- than Steven Tyler. The dude is a ROCK LEGEND, whereas she is a mere pimple on the wide ass of Music History.
ReplyDeleteAnd I actually kinda love The Voice. I can't stand Blake or Ceelo, really, but Xtina and Adam are really growing on me.
idc either way, but to not come back would be to bite off the hand that resurrected her.
ReplyDeleteb/c of the recent single charting--thx to idol, as you mentioned, enty, she's 'developed' an american idol-type search in latin america...it's gotten heavy hitter backers behind it and thus far in the audition process she's getting a lot of press. one of her biggest goals has always been to be huge in LatAm...like marc anthony huge...she hasn't accomplished that yet...but w/ MA on board for this, the reality mock-docu style manner in which it's being shot...she may seriously drag out her 15 mins. it's fallen into place beautifully for her--but again, none of this would've been possible w/o idol bringing her back to life. (marc certainly doesn't need it...he's tired of selling out stadium tours over and over). i too hope AI gets sufficiently pissed at her hem-hawing and drops her altogether...altho i'm sure they'll weight that heavily against what she brought to the show...b/c while i understand general market viewership was down overall, there was a huuuuuge spike latin market...something that translates well into the global franchise, esp. w/ the LatAm ones (in particular, argentina).
I wonder if the "Everyone in this town has more talent than you. You and I both know they do." is a reference to the MV blind of yore....
ReplyDeleteIsn't J-Lo a hot favourite to be that person?
Ida - did you ever hear the story about the protest outside her premiere for Mother-in-Law? A bunch of fur protesters were holding up signs saying "Monster in Law", etc. and when she was asked, upon entering the building, what she thinks about the animals who are skinned alive for the fur that she wears, she laughed and said: "I don't!" Since then, she's been dead to me.
ReplyDeleteExcellent rant, Enty. I co-sign every word.
You should change your name to "Maude" cuz you are right on, baby!
ReplyDeleteProduct Pixie, yes, she is one of the frontrunners for that blind.
ReplyDeleteIf it weren't for AI, J-Lo would not be enjoying her current "comeback". Even with it, it's not coming back quite as rapidly and strongly as she probably had hoped. It is absolutely possible to get a record deal and enjoy some fame without any talent, but I think it would be close to impossible to sustain it. In her case, I suppose she is pretty, and that always makes it easier, doesn't it? ;)
JLo.....
ReplyDeleteMeet Paula Abdul.
@Rocket Queen -- UGH. Yeah, I remember reading about that. :-( It may have been on CDAN, in fact.
ReplyDeleteDid you hear about when she appeared on a radio show and the host outright asked her if she had any idea about the origins of her precious furs? She was so "insulted" that she straight-up walked out of the interview. Bitch. If you're going to wear/do something that offends TONS of people, you'd better be prepared to answer for it. Sorry the interviewer didn't want to spend an entire twenty minutes discussing your terrible music and shitty movies.
Why hasn't someone doused her with flour or paint yet? I actually don't really condone stuff like that; the animal welfare movement already has a pretty aggressive and reactionary reputation already. But you'd think that she'd be a prime target, considering how much she loves leopard cub coats and cars with baby sealskin interior or whatever.
she is the epitome of a World Class Cunt. Strong words, and I totally mean them.
Oh, and she is TOTALLY MV. Enty, please give me an early b-day present and confirm it on the 4th!!
The thinking is that she needs these jobs (and the rather tacky cosmetics ads) because Marc Anthony has a huuuuuge IRS bill she's helping to pay off. Her manager Benny Medina offended some major PR firm here in NYC last week at an event they attended; his own clock may be ticking as well.
ReplyDeleteMV!
ReplyDeleteI read it too, ladies. MV reveal:
ReplyDelete"You and I both know..."
betcha.
Very well said, Enty! I was thinking the exact same rant in my head this morning when I read that crap. I truly hope AI stops pursuing her & just goes with the next one in line. If they can keep ratings without Simon, they won't lose a viewer over talentless JLo.
ReplyDeleteShe kind of redeemed herself with me with the AI gig. Never cared for her before, but she was pleasant on the show. I may have to go back to my original opinion.
ReplyDeleteCount me in on The Voice love. The 4 judges are all different, but doing ok in their own way. Xtina is certainly interesting to watch. Both what she's wearing and what will come out of her mouth.
That's good news, Weezy. Benny Medina is a slimeball.
ReplyDeleteWell, if that wasn't a reveal I don't know what is..
ReplyDeleteJennifer was paid $12 million for this past season of Idol. Which was $4 million more than was orginally offererd to her last summer. FOX gave her 12, and since this past season didn't crash, burn, smoulder to ash, and stink up the FOX brand as expected it would, Jennifer now wants that Simon Cowell money. Simon is off the show, but his company Fremantle Inc. still produces it and you don't want to piss off Simon Cowell. He knows how to handle twits like Jennifer.
ReplyDeleteJust ask Cheryl Cole.
Stick a brown wig on one of those Kim Kardashian blow-up sex dolls, play a Jennifer Lopez CD on loop and nobody will ever know the difference.
i know about his issue 1st-hand...marc is a skeevy tax evader...and has no problem paying the bill--he's just trying to get out of it. he's spent so much $ to fight it at this point, that he might as well continue. (yes, even his handlers are mocking him for it). but even jho's 12m paycheck don't make a dent into his yrly earnings. it's insane.
ReplyDeleteMy favorite image of Jennifer Lopez:
ReplyDeletehttp://thesuperficial.com/2007/02/jennifer-lopez-crying-03.jpg
Crying after the audience booed her shitty-acting ass during a screening of "Bordertown" a few years ago.
JasonBlueEyes, are you straight? I'm wondering if my crush on you is appropriate.
ReplyDeleteMaybe it's because I loved Alex P. Keaton at a real formative time in my youth.
Well, here's the deal. Jennifer is represented by Simon Fuller, the executive producer of Idol. He's behind her Latin show, too. Maybe this had been their plan all along... one year on idol to revamp her career and then on to someone else.
ReplyDeleteGwen Stefani would be awesome.
As for MV, Jennifer has always been auto tuned. She sounds the same as she ever did. Never been a great singer, as the MV blind suggests. I don't think it's real.
Have you guys read Go Fug Yourself's J.Lo tales? They are hysterical!
ReplyDeletehttp://gofugyourself.com/celebs/jennifer-lopez
“SO LOVERS. Last week, I was so bored. It was not Mas Lopez anymore, it was American Nap Hour. So I decided to get spicy this week, amigos! For me, that means flores, and sympathy, and above all, glittery Hammer pants that I wear while singing MY OWN HUGE HIT SONG! Yes, lovers, it is performance week for ME! You might have heard my song, “On The Floor.” If you have not, please go hit yourself with a heavy object, like my Marc’s ego. My extremely caliente single goes something like, “Blah blah on the floor, something-something Ibiza, floor floor on the floor, there’s a flor on the floor, yay for the floor, don’t be fooled by the fact that I’m not poor, I’m still I’m still Jenny from the floor,” and all that. Come dance with me and my baggy crotch! VENGANME.”
Jennifer doesn't realize that it isn't 1999 anymore. I think that's it.
ReplyDelete@libby - Yes, I am that rairity. A straight guy that loves gossip. LoL.
People called me Alex P. Keaton growing up. I never really liked the character. I loved the Mike Flaherty character on "Spin City" a lot more.
I completely took this as a MV reveal...
ReplyDeleteMy ex works for the DA's office in NYC. Years ago (when she was with PDiddy), my ex had the hugest crush on her and thought she was hot. When she and DIddy got arrested for the gun thing, my ex was there when they brought her in. He said he didn't even know it was her until they said told him who it was. He said she is chunky, not that attractive and so plain looking in person. He was so disappointed. After that, whenever he saw her, he said he couldn't stand her because he knows it's all fake.
ReplyDeleteI personally can't stand her, because she's arrogant and self absorbed. She thinks she's talented...not even remotely. She can most definitely dance...but she cannot sing (I wish she was MV so badly) and she certainly can't act with the whiny high pitched annoying voice.
GIVE ME AN "M"!
ReplyDeleteGIVE ME A "V"!
WHADDYA GOT???
A hot fuckin' mess!
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
ReplyDeleteCartwheels 'n' shit
Get Cindi Lauper, get Chrissie Hynde, get the Wilson Sisters. Hell see if Cher will do it. Get someone who isn't a ungrateful biatch.
ReplyDeleteCyndi Lauper is awesome. Gaga, Ke$ha and all the rest of them just ripped off everything she did 30 years ago. I second Cyndi as judge.
ReplyDeleteI love Chrissie too.
I didn't like her on Idol and I hope she goes away. That panel of judges was so lame, they wouldn't criticize anyone at the end (except my favorite Haley) and I guess that confused voters.
ReplyDeleteChrissie is the total OPPOSITE of J-Lo -- right down to her outspoken love for animals. Oh, and the fact that she's known to be nice and is tremendously talented.
ReplyDeleteI cosign it. I also adore Gwen.
That said, I'm already more interested in the X-Factor. Paula! Paula!
Agree with Enty 100%.
ReplyDeleteHire someone else, let Jennifer move on to her other things.
Whats up with Marc going on Lifetime. Gonna try and pay his taxes?
Steven Tyler was the breakout star of Idol this past year. They're going to keep him and kick of - Hell, I can't even be bothered to type her name.
ReplyDelete@crila16 - And that event happened on New Year's eve 1999. I could just imagine how much extra shit she needs to look presentable now.
Thank you, Enty. Exactly what I thought when I heard she "was unsure." Total BS to get more $ that she does not deserve.
ReplyDeleteDoes anyone think that maybe "Idol" doesn't want her back and she's doing the "Oh, I'm so busy these days - I haven't decided yet." ploy.
ReplyDeleteMiss thing needs to study those old tapes
ReplyDeleteof 'In Living Color' real hard. And remember where she came from and what she looked like.
Was she singing on THAT show?
The last HONEST job she ever had!!
Jason, maybe I'm hanging out on different sites from you, but I got the opposite impression - that J.Lo was the huge hit of the season. Everyone kept talking about how gorgeous she looked. (No matter how much makeup/extensions/etc. it took.) I think that unless her demands are truly exhorbitant, the show will pony up a lot of cash for her. I bet she could easily get $20 million, but knowing her, she'll probably push for $50 or something.
ReplyDeleteCome on, JLo wasn't being nice for the contestants, she was faking niceness to makeover her "diva" image. Backstage, she was apparently her old demanding self.
ReplyDeleteI used to feel sorry for her for being married to a controlling hubby but she never learns. The clock is ticking on her sex appeal. It's fading fast and she should cash it on it while she still can.
Recalling her time on "Living Color" -- there's a reason Rosie Perez kept her in the back row of the dancers, half in the dark. She was chunky and clumsy. I assume she dated an assortment of Wayans to get her exposure.
ReplyDeleteI remember the PDiddy police incident. When the cops stopped the car and were frisking the men, J and her girls simply started walking away. No asking if anyone had been hurt by the shot, or if they could leave. They kept walking even after the NYPD called after them. The cops had to physically walk over and bring them back to the car. Says volumes about the people they learned behavior from.
Thank you Jason Blue Eyes for providing me with the GREATEST. PIC. EVER.
ReplyDeleteRemember her arrest in 1999 and how she lied about her age by one year! It took the arrest for her to come clean about her real birth date. What a loser.
ReplyDeleteQuestion for Ida and RocketQueen--Why do you both hate Jennifer so much for the fact that she wears fur, yet you love Gwen Stefani? I don't know if Gwen wears real fur, but I KNOW she wears leather (and designs it for her line). I'm really not trying to be facetious or sarcastic, I'm genuinely curious and would like to know. Is there a difference as far as animal cruelty?
ReplyDeleteI never thought Jlo's vocals ever sounded good enough to be voiced by a studio singer covering for her.
ReplyDeleteHer new song sounds like an over-produced remake of someone else's cover of a cheesy 80's disco song. Not as god-awful as the Louboutins song but damned hear close.
J Lo has diarrhea of the mouth.
ReplyDeleteJamee, you're right, it's just as bad. But there's something so gratuitous about fur. It's like a giant "fuck you" to animals. Leather is very practical, and fur is completely unnecessary.
ReplyDelete2 years since she had a movie role?? The Back Up Plan didn't count? ;)
ReplyDeleteI'm more interested in the fact that MA/they are tax evaders. Anyone know a figure? That really burns me up!
I kind of liked her on Idol BUT more than $12 million? I'd find someone else, who'd be more appreciative of the opportunity.
This outburst doesn't sound like it comes from an entertainment lawyer but then, Enty rarely does.
ReplyDeleteI can't stand J-Lo either.
ReplyDeleteBut I'm wondering whether all you anti-fur folks wear leather?
I just can't get over her cruelty to animals for their fur for her clothing line. They are skinning these animals alive and then throwing them in a pit to suffer and die after. PETA put out the video one time of the ranch Jennifer gets her fur from. It was graphic and disturbing. She is also well aware of the abuse and doesn't care. She LOVES her fur and nothing will stop her. If you ever get to see the video, you'll hate her too. She's dispicable, selfish and a horrible person.
ReplyDeleteOh, I don't think leather is ecologically sustainable or ethically sound, either -- but I'm also realistic enough to know that, barring some agricultural catastrophe, people are going to eat beef and drink cow's milk until we go extinct, basically.
ReplyDeleteI dunno. At least more than just a few parts of the cow are being used. Again: people don't EAT foxes, minks, beavers, etc. I'm not sure how much my views would change, though, given how barbarically those animals are killed for their pelts alone.
I guess I have a utilitarian view when it comes to leather. If they're using the hides of cows to make car seats, belts, shoes, keychains, etc., I figure it's better than wasting such a large part of the animal.
However, I've heard that the majority of leather primarily comes from cows that are raised for their skins, and apparently they're treated just as terribly as their furrier counterparts who are reared for the same reason. I'm not vegan, but every time I hear about these things, I lean closer and closer to that lifestyle. I'm just not sure who/what to trust anymore.
I've found Birkenstocks and whatnot at the flea market and yard sales for dirt cheap, and I've snagged them up. I won't lie. But I've never paid full price for leather products, and I just can't imagine ever doing so. It's not not a textile I gravitate toward, but to see other people wearing it doesn't really provoke major ire, for whatever reason.
If you wear fur, you're essentially silently tossing a middle finger at people who adore ALL animals -- not just the ones who hang out in our own homes, yards, barns, purses, etc -- and you're signifying that you just don't care when other creatures suffer agonizing fates just so you can wear something luxurious and ostentatious. You're proudly announcing that you support cruelty in the name of fashion, and you don't *care* if it triggers negative reactions in compassionate people.
As long as people have the right to wear it, I figure I have the right to be upset by it. And *everyone* should have the right to question it.
The leather vs. fur thing *is* a fair question, though.
@Jamee - personally, I'm no fan of Stefani...she irritates me for other reasons. I don't buy or advocate leather myself, but at least the animals aren't kept in farms and cages and anally electrocuted for their skins. Fur is the absolute WORST.
ReplyDeleteYOU HATE HER AS MUCH AS I DO and for the exact same reasons!!!! ughhhhh she needs to go away!!!
ReplyDeletePlease make J Lo go away for good. Someone? Anyone?
ReplyDeletePlease make J Lo go away for good. Please!
ReplyDeletePlease make J Lo go away for good. Please!
ReplyDelete