Wednesday, March 09, 2011

The Goopster Signs A Record Deal


Gwyneth Paltrow is a good singer. Probably better than average. Is she better than the usual top 3 of American Idol? No. For some reason though, Atlantic Records has decided they would like to spend $1M or so on an advance to the Goopster and however much she costs them in recording time and given her a record deal. I am not sure why. The only reason I can think of is they are kissing Chris Martin's butt. Really, what other reason is there? Yes, The Goopster will get publicity for her record and be able to go on talk shows and promote it, but Scarlett J could do that too but if the record sucks, then it won't make any difference. Songs are going to have to be bought. This just seems like Atlantic had an extra couple of million sitting around and decided to spend it on a vanity project for Gwyneth. Great for her, but lousy for the band that is good and wanted a deal and bad for the listening public who will have The Goopster thrust on us like free samples at a Costco.

26 comments:

  1. Watched Glee last night and she was on again. I'll give her this, she CAN sing and has a slight country twang. What she CANNOT do is DANCE. Holy Hannah, she is awful. AWKWARD to watch.
    My understanding is it will be a country album which is fine since I don't like country anyway.

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  2. Even Lainey who loves her said she sucked on Glee.

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  3. I don't see what the problem is--less talented singers than Goop have gotten contracts. I don't get the overall hate-on for her.

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  4. I like her on Glee. The adults are all awkwardly acted (Terri Schuester, Emma Pillbury) and she fits right in.

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  5. Ugh. How unfair is this? The little princess of two movie stars grows up to marry a rock and roll star. She's been spoiled since before she was born, I'm sure, because that's how she acts. There are so many great, unknown acts out there--how dare she even consider taking a record contract? If she cared about music, she'd be PRODUCING some of those acts. Hope her colonic gets stuck.

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  6. you know what-it is going to fail.
    this will give her a wake-up call- the masses do not think you are as special as you think you are.

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  7. I gave up swearing for Lent ... so this is the clean version of what I would have said:

    "Wow, isn't that something? Gwyneth is such an uninteresting person and I terribly dislike her."

    Whew. That was hard. 39 days to go!

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  8. chopchop: I'm only seeing the good in people. It's only 40 days.

    Last year my sis did the same as you but had a $1 jar in the kitchen to add to when she lost control.

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  9. I think this is just fine. Nasville will be pissed though. I like her cooking stuff too on Goop.

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  10. Anonymous11:13 AM

    LOL@chopchop

    Even if FishStick is considered a good singer I still will not waste my time listening to her music or acting. Can't stand her.

    Regarding her dancing she is stiff as a board and to top it off no butt hahaha.

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  11. Somebody will have to back her up. They will have to auto tune like in the movie. I see plenty of jobs for folks in this deal. It's not a bad thing.

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  12. Anonymous11:40 AM

    LOL@chopchop. Poor thing. : (

    LMAO@Sylvia - Goop as "Fishstick", that is a funny visual, I love it. : )

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  13. oh good, because she didn't have a big enough ego already.

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  14. lol @ chopchop!

    I think it was Lainey speculating about how Chris Martin must feel. Busting his ass in a band for YEARS for recognition. His wife does a cameo or two and Boom. Record contract. That has GOT to stick in the craw of most real artists who work for YEARS to get a contract.

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  15. @ChopChop...godspeed, friend. I wish you luck with your 40 days without cussing. I, personally, cannot fathom that shit.

    Anyway.

    If Carrie Underwood and her shrillass voice can be lauded by Nashville and sell millions of records internationally, I see no reason why Gwyneth can't have a shot at the same profession.

    G. once said something along the lines of "I know I'm really fucking good at my job, and the people who count know it, too."

    And, honestly...she's right. She's an insufferable snob in real life, but she's also a REALLY GOOD actress, and she CAN sing. Forget about the recent forays into terrible television; her CV has a lot of diverse roles, and I've always personally been pretty impressed by her performances.

    And she might be spoiled, snotty, Hollywood royalty, but she's always maintained a pretty classy exterior. No rehab, no Maxim shoots, no coke scandals. Hell, the skeeziest thing she's ever done is date Ben Affleck.

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  16. She's foolish...this will bomb...big time

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  17. Anonymous12:17 PM

    Oh, great! One more feather in Goopy's I-am-soooo-superior-to-the-rest-of-you-mere-mortals cap.

    Wait...and did Amoteaflout just diss Ben Affleck? *sputters* I really liked that chick, too.

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  18. Anonymous12:21 PM

    @ Simone - Yeah I love her, too. I would rip Ben Affleck's clothes off, no problem. I cannot be the only one who would. : )

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  19. @Simone and bluebonnet -- Oh, Ben is cute and talented, for sure. But I still remember G. saying that his ideal woman is a stripper at Scores -- and she's totally right. :-)

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  20. Anonymous12:56 PM

    BBM and amoteafloat - I just watched The Town last night with Ben's commentary. He may be unable to resist a woman with a pole between her legs (and who can?) but he is smart and funny, too.

    He was in Washington yesterday trying to keep attention on the Congo, but what is really important is the photo. He is really cute with long hair, right?

    Such a pretty man!

    Sorry for the Fox News link. I bitch slapped myself, hard.

    I am glad he got Goopy a little dirty back in the day. Probably the most fun she ever had...except for when she dated Luke Wilson. *snort*

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  21. I thought Goopy wasn't a bad singer too, until her Oscars performance. Blah.

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  22. @Mooshki -- I left the room. She was nervous, and I couldn't take it!

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  23. Goopster sings better than I do, but IMO her voice is not really strong enough to go pro. Of course, she's the Goopster and will do it anyway. I don't think she'll go too far -- he personality is too blah. (And she is not very likable.)

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  24. I don't think she's that great of an actress. Only heard her sing in a clip I saw on YouTube with Vince Gill(?).

    Insufferable. That describes Paltrow exactly. I hope to see her CD's in the bargain bins.

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  25. I don't think she's that great of an actress. Only heard her sing in a clip I saw on YouTube with Vince Gill(?).

    Insufferable. That describes Paltrow exactly. I hope to see her CD's in the bargain bins.

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  26. You got it right when you described it as a vanity project. It's just a way for record execs to ride Gwynneth's current wave of "popularity". It's no different than Kim Kardashian getting a record deal or Snooki writing a book.
    I do wonder, though, if there have been any studies done on the profits gained by these kinds of projects. It seems that they wouldn't make so much, but would these companies shell out the money to produce this crap otherwise?

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