So, did you watch the first episode of Sister Wives? I did and I have to say that Kody Brown is an ass, but I will keep watching it. I mean the guy did not grow up Mormon he picked a religion which would allow him to have sex with multiple women. I sure hope that TLC has the entire first season shot already because the police in Lehi, Utah are investigating the family for a possible charge of felony bigamy.
Apparently these types of relationships are rarely looked at by policy, but because the whole thing has been publicized and people all over the world are watching, the police actually have to look like they want to keep a tight rein on bigamy. There is only one legal wife on the show so I don't know how there could be bigamy. All of the rest of the women Kody lives with are legally just his girlfriends. That of course means they have no rights but that is probably how Kody wants it.
I figured something like this would happen, but thought it would be health insurance or IRS fraud or something of the like.
ReplyDeleteWow...I watched it and was blown away at how "normal" they all felt the situation was! Really really really really wierd....but...alas...I will continue to watch! I guess a new wife will be coming into the picture.
ReplyDeleteI have to wonder why poligomy (sp?) is only OK for the men and not the women? I mean..I could use one husband to help watch the kids, the other to cook, one to clean and do laundry....
Oh...and by the way...I loved how wife #1 said they "don't go wierd" when asked about sleeping with the other women. Pretty funny when you look at the statement in context that your husband has 2 other wives and oodles of kids and you feel that is "normal."
ReplyDeleteCan someone school me on those in the polygamist sect abuses welfare and food stamps? I would love to hear about this. Society has their own preconceived notions about who abuses those types of programs.
ReplyDeleteIf they are scamming welfare, the consequences are theirs to accept. If they are consenting adults and no one is coerced or underage, I don't give a crap. I DO give a crap about other sects of the FLDS that Utah turns a blind eye too or lets off the hook for coercing girls into marrying dirty old men. The "legit" cult-mainstream LDS which also controls the state government in UT has its own "don't ask, don't tell" policy with the extremist sects. Time to seriously put a hunt down on those pedophiles. This "investigation" is a joke--its all for tv. It will not rescue the girls and boys being truly abused in this particular "religion"/cult.
ReplyDeleteShould have been: abuse welfare and food stamps.
ReplyDeleteI just remembered someone commenting about this.
On another website someone posted that in Utah if you are married to #1 and cohabit with #2 (or more, I assume), or even hold #2-plus out as a spouse, it's bigamy. And this guy said they were "spiritually" married (meaning they had an LDS sealing ceremony.)
ReplyDeleteHe ain't all that. Couldn't at least of of these women do better?
ReplyDeleteRCN,
ReplyDeleteBecause only one of the wives is legally married, the others are technically "single mothers". And often they don't work or have jobs that don't pay well. So even though these women are married in their eyes, they file for benefits based on their legal unmarried status.
One woman + no job + 13 kids = a lot of benefits.
However, many of these husbands truly can't afford to support their legions of children (who could?) and so in many ways the support is necessary for a lot of these families.
Because the FLDS feels that they are superior to everyone else, they actually teach that it is right to work the system like this.
I'm not Mormon but I know that the Mormon church has tried to distance itself from bigamy as much as possible. It was a provision of statehood that Utah ban bigamy, and the church's official stand is that marriage consists of one man, one woman.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, if this guy thinks he's spiritually married to the other two, I can assure you that it's not with the blessing of the LDS church. Perhaps they belong to FDLS or another breakoff sect, but the Mormons do not condone bigamy--just homophobia in the form of Prop Hate.
I meant to type "...at least one of these women..."
ReplyDeleteI have mentioned this on here before, read "Under the Banner of Heaven" by Jon Krackuer (sp?). It talks about the FLDS but also about the Morman religion in general. I knew nothing about it and this book is a real eye-opener, it is very enlightening and disturbing at the same time. There is some really messed up stuff that goes on in the name of religion.
ReplyDeleteI can promise yall that this is not nor will it be the first case of this coming out-so to speak. This has been happening for years and the Attorney General in Utah, Idaho, Arizona and Nevada have known about it. One of my best friends grew up in St. Geroge UT and said that yes, there were many families like this, but the way it was looked at-at that time-was drugs were a bigger problem than who had X amount of wives and kids. That being said now, with the info about Warren Jeffs and the perverts in TX, this has come out into the mainstream. There are groups all over the US and Canada and even some going down into Mexico.
ReplyDeleteand much love to blondegossip and gladyskravitz-yall hit it on the head.
ReplyDeleteMy second wife was LDS and she and her LDS friends were about as conventional as you get; really nice, but really conservative. Of course a lot of Mormons are descended from polygamists, a fact that they laugh about.
ReplyDeleteWhere I reside, you will only get checks for two kids. So you can have 13 if you like, you will not benefit much. LOL.
ReplyDeleteI watched that mess and all I could think was how gross looking that one woman looks. Face like a peeled potato. Also, the third wife is clearly a psychological/emotional mess. Mrs. "I only ever wanted to be the third wife." Well, fiddle dee dee. Way to shoot for those stars.
ReplyDeleteBut what happens when a caseworker visits the house? Do they evaluate a household of this sort as stable?
ReplyDeleteI was raised Mormon, but I resigned two years ago because I don't believe in any of it, and Prop 8 was the last straw. Out of all the comments, GladysKravitz is the most accurate: the Mormon church does not condone polygamy and distances itself from it as much as possible. While my ancestors who founded Utah were polygamists (looserdude, I do laugh but I'm slightly mortified at the same time), none of my family members who practice Mormonism are polygamists. Mormons stopped practicing polygamy years ago to be entered into the union -- if my history serves me correct.
ReplyDeleteThough I agree that Mormonism has its cons (don't even get me started on their 50s patriarchal family lifestyle causing Mormon wives to become depressed and seek therapy, or their vociferous disdain of porn that ironically makes Utah one of the states with the highest rate of downloaded porn and porn addiction), polygamy isn't one of them. And while they're not a cult (every religion is weird to an outsider), they do live in their own bubble. Trust.
this tool even said it in the first 10mins of the show that Mormons stopped practicing polygamy about 120 years ago.
ReplyDeletei feel for the first wife,its like she couldn't have more kids and she just looks naive and trapped. the second one was a breeding mare and the third is a f-cking whackjob.
As much as i think the husband is getting his cake and eating it too..i'm not really bothered by the first 3,it's bringing the 4th in with her 3 kids that disturbs me.
Can't the other women claim a common law marriage and be entitled to rights that way?
ReplyDeleteKarmen - good luck to you. All religions are cults. Wishing you the best.
ReplyDeleteI thought Mormons had their own welfare system?
ReplyDeleteI forgot to watch it, I'll have to catch a rerun!
ReplyDeleteI've already stated that I don't have any issues with the idea of polygamy as long as it's between consenting adults. It would be interesting to see a family with a couple of husbands too, though...*L* but that doesn't really happen, does it? My husband and I often joke (JOKE) about him taking a second wife, but that I then would have the right to go find a second husband. But then it gets complicated because do we let the other two sleep with each other? Or is it just couple #1 that get to sleep with others? Hmm. Decisions.
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ReplyDelete__-__=__ Thanks. My mom didn't care. I think my dad was a tiny bit upset since it's his heritage, but he's known for a long time that I was a lost cause when it came to the church. My oldest sister, who is a devout Mormon, doesn't know and I haven't the heart to tell her. She nearly had a heart attack when I told her I didn't believe in God.
ReplyDelete@kimmypie - The other wives can't ask for common law marriage legally since polygamy is illegal in Utah.
@sunnyside - What do you mean by welfare system? All my years in the church and I've never heard of such a thing.
@Maja - I learned in an antho class that there is such a thing as women having multiple wives. It's called polyandry and it's practiced in some Asian cultures.
Karmen, my best friend growing up was Mormon. She married a complete jerk and when they finally ended up with 11 kids and destitute, I am sure she told me they had a food bank that was only for Mormons and some assitance from her stake. They lived in Orderville, so maybe it was just a local thing. From what I know of the LDS, I think you are lucky to have escaped. Good luck.
ReplyDelete@Sunnyside - The LDS I knew in Austin were very supportive of their poorer members, but 1) that's on a local basis and 2), those folks on "Sister Wives" are not LDS.
ReplyDeleteBig Love kind of freaks me out so I don't think I will be watching the reality based version. Ewwwww....
ReplyDeletePolygamy/Bigamy ≠ sexy!
LOL~did this brain trust really think that authorities wouldn't be checking on their shit?? With as much publicity as TLC was throwing out there, someone was going to catch wind and do something
ReplyDeleteI really don't care if people want to live alternative lifestyles. When I was in College, the cool thing was to be bisexual and have a "primary" partner and other partners and then people you messed around with.
ReplyDeleteHaving one opposite sex monogamous partner was bourgeouis and repressed. So because these people aren't tattooed and pierced and because he uses religion as his jusitification - this is now wrong?
Interesting story, Karmen. I get in trouble here when I comment on religious posts, so I'll only say "good for you" ;)
ReplyDeleteI won't watch this mess - it just makes me sad for these women.
I havent seen it yet but ya'll have me intrigued. Funnily enough I have just started dating a guy who was raised Mormon and is the only one to defect out of 6 sibs. We are already having slight problems and I can really see how being oppressed through your sexuality your whole life, which is what I think not just Mormons but most organized religion teaches ppl to do, can really fuck a person up.
ReplyDeleteIts like when you're taught to deny your sexuality or embrace clearly overtly patriarchtical values(i.e. Sister Wives) this bleeds into all other aspects of your life and you end up suppressing your emotions and your communication level with ppl suffers too, as you barely know who to truthfully communicate with yourself, let alone a significant other.
Sorry to blather on like this but this is another example to me of why organized religion just fucks ppl up mentally and makes them go against themselves.
now stepping off my soap box : 0
ReplyDeleteI missed the show, I really did want to see it. Oh well.
ReplyDeleteNY still has adultery listed as a crime although there are rarely charges. Other than that, I cant think of what laws are being broken if a married man and his wife choose to have multiple partners.
I know a couple that regularly swaps with another couple, and of a woman who lives with a couple in return for joining them in bed occasionally. I know some gay men who like to invite their roommate to the party, as well as some of their friends. While these things may be morally offensive, they're not illegal to the best of my knowledge. Men cheat on their wives all the time. Those women sometimes get pregnant and become single parents.
My childhood best friend is Mormon and she is messed UP in the head about sexuality, men and her thinking on alcohol and clothing. She is almost 40 and never married, just lived w/ men and felt the guilts about it. I'm w/ you all that organized religion messes people up.
ReplyDeleteDo the staunch Mormon's still where those girdle thingies under all their clothes?
I would love to have 7 husbands!
ReplyDeleteI was raised in the LDS church, and you will never find nicer, kinder, or more sincere people as practicing members of the church. I have never met as many people, who really walk their talk.
ReplyDeleteHowever, the patriachial, homophobia has really put me off. Don't believe my Heavenly Father, hates gays or thinks men are smarter than me.
Chiming in as another who was raised Mormon. Although I have also left the church, I find that shows like this make me defensive on behalf of LDS members. The vast, vast majority are wonderful, caring and kind people who truly try to live their lives as honorably as they can. Sure, they have extremists, as most religions do, but in my experience, most LDS are a lot more open minded than you might think.
ReplyDeleteAnd for the record, polygamy was never mentioned in any context ever to me or any member of my family or friends. I never knew of anyone who wore the undergarments either.
The church certainly has many faults, but shows like this just perpetuate the myth that the Mormon church is some kind of dangerous, fundamentalist cult and that just isn't the case. And this is coming from someone who hides when the missionaries come to my door LOL!
Sue Ellen, love that comment about wife #3 "way to shoot for the stars"...lol And how come we never hear about a wife who has 3 husbands? I watched the whole thing, but missed the last 10 minutes 'cause my husband was cracking up so hard. Why is #4 available? Is she a widow? I can't believe I care.....
ReplyDeleteI have not had a chance to read all y'all's comments yet, looks like a TON of them!
ReplyDeleteMy first jaw-drop, however, was seeing the husband's pic for the first time. Definitely NOT what I expected him to look like!
And I truly believe I would be in federal prison now for slaughtering assholes, had I been raised in this bullshit.
ReplyDeletedidn't watch it, and won't.
Legitimizes and apologizes for extremists like the FLDS sicko/pedos.
I will never, ever watch this show. I am so staunchly against watching reality show programs that feature JERKS or IDIOTS and makes them famous/pays them lots of money.
ReplyDeleteThey don't deserve a penny.
And that goes for all of them: Jersey Shore, Kardashians, Kate plus 8, etc etc etc.
On the radio tonight a Utah polices spokeswoman said that under Utah law if you live in the house a 'wife' then you can be charged with the crime. So they can be charged. I think it's creepy from the little bit I saw.
ReplyDeleteI'd rather watch Criminal Minds, which I just discovered and am additcted to.
@Trixie - I hide when the missionaries come knocking, too! So does my mom.
ReplyDeleteI'm with Trixie and curlysue. There are really nice people in the Mormon church. My oldest sister is one of them.
The garments you guys are thinking of look like girdles, but they aren't meant to make you look slim or hold up pantyhose; they're a modesty enforcer. That means no revealing (e.g. sleeveless, strapless, low-cut, short hemlines) or tight clothing. Anyone who has served their mission or has gotten married in the temple wears them.