Let's Talk The Bachelor Pad

Come on did you seriously think I'd commandeer this blog and NOT talk the Bachelor Pad? Let's get comfortable and settle in for some "Bitch,please." with Jax.

First, I did not expect it to be so much like the Bachelor show on ABC. I think I was thinking separate entity like Paradise Hotel. Oh my god, who didn't LOVE Paradise Hotel? Anyway, so the cast pulls up in separate limos and greets Chris Harrison individually like they haven't been talking and seeing the guy constantly for the last 3 weeks. They all enter the house in very suspicious order with Tenley screeching as each one enters the room. Newly married Melissa Rycroft co-hosts for some odd reason and after all the rules are explained the cast wonders off to find out they are all sharing bunk beds in one room. That would suck. They are staying in a gorgeous, massive, multi-room mansion with several bedrooms and bathrooms and they are all crammed into 1 room. Didn't stop Michelle and Craig from getting it on the first night! And Tenley, being the 5 year old girl she is, tells everyone and then gets corned by Michelle in the Big Scary Bathroom. Bitch,please. Everyone knows if you talk smack about the crazy girl your a-- is gonna get corned at some point. The lesson to be learned is only talk about girls you can take. Oh, and don't cry like a toddler on national tv. Or just keep your nose out of it and no more Big Scary Bathroom situations.

Drinking happens, people pair off and some already hook up. And I do not blame Natalie one bit when faced with that fine specimen Jesse? Hell-o! Elizabeth has come forward as the Stage 5 Clinger. Apparently her and Jesse K. hooked up a few times/fell in love before the show and she's having a hard time dealing with the fact He's Just Not That Into You. So now she has decided to play the "girls will vote you out for being a dick to me" card and tells him, "Just tell them you are in love with me, pretend you care about me." Poor Jesse, you can tell he has no idea what to do with the stalker in the bunk bed below. She just doesn't seem to get It. But boy is it going to be fun to see her try!

Craig M. and the Weatherman are back,much to the chagrin of the Weatherman and the women, who were unsuccessful in voting him out. Out went Juan instead, basically because he cheated on Nikki, another ex in the house. The girl that got voted off was Michelle, her brand of crazy was past its sell by date. So far the show has proved to be pretty entertaining, more so than the original shows it spawned from. But for the love of Lagerfeld, somebody at ABC please tell Chris Harrison his plaid shirt/lavender tie was NOT a fashion hit.