Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Hef Doesn't Have Sex, He Makes Love


Hugh Hefner was interviewed in The New York Times Question thing they do every Sunday. I don't know if this was just a coincidence or they knew that Kendra's book would also be coming out and that Hef should say a few words about his sex life. They also talked about women and ideals and how Playboy is not doing as well as they once were. But, this was the most interesting to me.

Do you take a lot of Viagra?
I don’t take a lot, but I take it when it’s called for.

How often is it called for?
I make love a couple of times a week, and I take the Viagra when I’m going to be making love. I would say at 84 it helps. It’s God’s little helper.

You’re not paid by Viagra to say that, are you?
No, they get that advertising from me for free.

What are you planning for the future?
More of the same.

Do you really think assembly line sex is making love? Where is the love? It is just a string of women bouncing up and down on Hef while everyone else cheers him on in the background telling him what a stud he is. Do you think he thinks of it as something else? Do you think his girlfriend dreads when she sees him going into the bathroom and watches him take a Viagra? Does he give her a little wink? Does she have to go to sleep with him at 7pm, or can she stay up later? I know she has a curfew, but does the girlfriend not get up? When he eats dinner at 4pm does she also?

27 comments:

  1. Anonymous10:27 AM

    I believe Jillian's poorly written and edited masterpiece Hefnerland. Larry Fylnt has made snide remarks about him liking men. I guess when you have had so much vajayjay, it all starts to look the same, and men are next in line for you.

    He's become an old, stupid fool! But I do want him to get back with Holly.

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  2. That delicious croissant I ate 5 minutes ago is now turning violently in my stomach.


    Please, no beard shots later on, or there will be severe gastric complications.

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  3. Meh. He's old. Let him have fun. But I also want him to get back with Holly.

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  4. WTF is up with Blogger lately, FFS?

    I just lost a long, well-though out comment and then, poof! Gone. Gggggrrrrrr.

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  5. What's the difference between a Playboy model, a prostitute, and a mistress?

    Not much...

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  6. What's the difference between a Playboy model, a prostitute, and a mistress?

    Not much...

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  7. The model give you ten percent, the prostitute gives you fifty percent, and you give the waitress twenty percent.

    Hey, Enty, I'm a little bothered by the image of a series of young women bouncing up and down on Jef's [expletive deleted]. C'mon, be nice to your readers! Blech.

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  8. Yeah, I had a long, well-thought out comment too...

    Okay, I didn't. I was only going to say "vomit".

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  9. I could be way off on this but I strongly believe that the sexual escapades of the 80-plus Hefner are mythical. I don't doubt that he was a sex machine back in the 70s, but even some of that I'm sure is fabricated.

    The whole Girls Next Door and the Playboy culture of today just annoys me. I don't understand why it's so celebrated. It's a skeezy old man surrounded by plastic dumbass women who are just whoring themselves out for a bit of fame and being kept in the Playbody Mansion.

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  10. Playboy Mansion. Duh. Sorry for typo.

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  11. I actually like the Playbody typo. It reminds me of "Amazon Women on the Moon," where they have the Pethouse Playthings in centerfolds.

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  12. That wasn't a typo, Susan, that was a Freudian slip. :)

    Blogger is on crack. If I write a long comment, I copy it onto my clipboard before submitting it because the odds are good it will be eaten.

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  13. Ya know, I don't blame Hef for doing what he can, after all, he's just a man. But what are these women thinking?

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  14. I didn't just puke, I merely evacuated the contents of my stomach. It's all about diction.

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  15. this man is quite simply, a pos.

    that is all.

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  16. meeeeehhhh, that image of hugh winking at me and popping a pill will haunt my dreams tonight

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  17. Ok, we know what pill Hef takes. But what pills do the girls take besides Valtrex? Something to make them completely unaware of what they are doing as they are doing it with no memory of anything after...I hope.

    Yeah. Vomit.

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  18. Not an attractive image. Either he is full of crap, or the women give themselves date rape drugs. I can't imagine anyone being totally lucid during a Hef encounter.

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  19. Eww. The image of that will be on my brain like the Hulk Hogan sunoil image. --- I just got a case of the YUCKS.

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  20. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  21. Susan: I've always figured the same thing. Hef the legendary stud is the stuff of legends. Everybody knows he wasn't boning all of the "girlfriends."

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  22. I like Hef - he seems to like women the way a lot of gay guys like women, LOL. Kendra's description of the 1-minute 'ride' sort of made me crack up.

    AND -- I like Kendra and Holly, even though I'm the type of woman who is normally disgusted with Barbie doll types. There. I've said it. (slinks away - wait, I've posted worse crap than this - and I've not been banned. Yet...)

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  23. The part of the article that talked about the background waiting list sex girls yelling out to eff whoever was on top REALLY creeped me out.

    How does he not have more children running around IF they never use protection?

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  24. Abortions, MCH. Abortions.

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  25. Well, yeah, obviously but seems like they would try and milk a pregnancy for more $$ & exposure. Maybe he makes them sign some kind of agreement before assembly line sex? Good times.

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