The Danielle Staub Sex Tape Bombs - Tries Lesbian Market
Last night, Real Housewife Danielle Staub was on Andy Cohen's show. He is the guy in charge of programming at Bravo so he gives himself his own show. It is actually not a horrible show. I mean sure, it can be a train wreck and it is just one big Bravo love fest, but it isn't like he puts on people with really bad songs who are trying to fool the world into thinking they are a lesbian just to sell sex tapes. Right?
Well, last night that all changed. Danielle sang her new song with Lori Michaels who is out. Danielle then looked all googedly eyed at Lori and when Andy asked if Lori was her girlfriend, Danielle did not say anything. She did say that no one is buying her sex tape. She blames it on the fact she had not had her new breast surgery at that point. Uh huh. Yeah. That is the reason.
I laughed so hard when the cameras went to Andy during the song. He had this freakishly weird glow-in-the-dark smile.
ReplyDeleteOh, and Danielle's face looks even more contorted.
Oh, and I loved when they showed the front of the clinic where she got her boobs re-done. The sign was missing about three letters being lit up. Classy.
Someone actually watches Andy's ego-fest?
ReplyDelete1. I was stunned that Danielle could actually sing.
ReplyDelete2. I agree with chihuahuense about Andy Cohen. I generally like him, but in this clip, he looks as if he's getting ready to appear in an episode of Criminal Minds as the slightly developmentally delayed mass murderer.
3. Danielle isn't a lesbian. She's an equal opportunity manipulator.
4. The song isn't horrendous (not Tardy to the Party), but it's boring. Really boring.
5. I think I'll go take a nap now.
what, wait..andy cohen is in charge of programming @ bravo? seriously? i like the guy, but there's something warped about that.
ReplyDeleteand danielle sings now? i thought it was the countess? geez, i need to start watching more tv.
I didn't know Andy was in charge of Bravo programming? He went from bit parts in SATC to programming a television network??
ReplyDeleteI wonder what he had to do to get that job?
Anyways, his little ego feeder show can be funny in a crazy kind of way.
last week when Kathy Griffin did the cross-eyed impression of him, I almost died.
ReplyDeleteThis woman is vile. I couldn't even make it through a minute.
ReplyDeleteUGG. GROSS.
andy is senior VP of programming and development or something at bravo. he's a wheel.
ReplyDeletei cracked up at this freak on last night's show. before her surgery, she said 'now i'll be pretty.'
uh, no. not unless you next take yourself to the cleveland clinic and get one of those face transplants. that's your only shot, bitch.
I loved how she said this surgery was out of necessity and not for aesthetic purposes "let's be clear on that." Um, ok, so you got the first three surgeries for aesthetic purposes, but this one is not, so we are somehow supposed to not see you as a superficial bitch-face? Ohhh, ok, I get it.
ReplyDeleteThe faux-lesbian posing made me sick to my stomach. I hope Lori is in on the joke and not just being used.
ReplyDeleteThe best part was Bravo's great edit, cutting right from "It's not for aesthetic purposes" to "Now I'll be pretty."
I really think she believes most of what she says, but her narcissistic personality disorder has her way out of touch with reality. She said she only brought 2 people to the fundraiser. Crazy Lady, you're being taped! We saw your entourage with our own eyes!
I loved that Andy clearly didn't believe half of what she said, and he gave her that major jab saying that Dena was his choice for "Mazel" too.
Oh, and she's "never had work done on her face?" Again, we just saw the bandaids on your chin when you walked out of the strip mall surgeon's!
ReplyDeleteI don't watch the NJ housewives, but have the show DVR'd. I was shocked that a Housewife could sing!!!! :-O
ReplyDeleteBravo's editing is the best part of the show. Agree with Mooshki on "It's not for aesthetic purposes. Let me be very clear on that" and then "Now I'll be pretty". Hilarious. Also when she said her surgeon was highly recommended and this was his specialty, then they cut to him saying he's never seen any deformity like hers and he doesn't know how to do it. I'm sure she loved watching that- she's out cold with a surgeon saying the equivalent of "dude this is gonna be rough"
ReplyDeleteI have to say that Danielle is one vile woman (and I use the word "woman" loosely), but she actually sounded better than the Countess. At least I didn't die laughing when I heard it. I haven't seen last night's episode yet (DVR'd so it can be watched tonight). Can't wait to see it now!
ReplyDeleteLol @ this train wreck starting at around 1:20. That smile on the host's face was like Monroe from Too Close for Comfort mixed with Anthony Bourdain.
ReplyDeleteI'm delighted to say that I haven't wasted one minute of my life on any of these lying whore's "shows". :-D
ReplyDeleteLOL at this post/comments. :)
ReplyDeleteI love Andy Cohen. He cracks me up.
Maybe Danielle should have tried pulling a Kim Zolciak BEFORE releasing the bagel breath sex tape (I want to vomit everytime I see that clip on TMZ)
I keep forgetting to watch Watch What Happens! They have had some pretty big celeb guests this year too!
What's the bagel breath sex tape??? You mean Danielle's sex tape?
ReplyDeleteI loved Bravo's face after they finished! I thought he was going to pass out from clapping! He was sooooo hysterical! Worth it!
@Lissette
ReplyDeleteYeah, TMZ keeps showing this clip of the sex tape where she is smacking her mouth and talking about the pre-sex bagel she had with cream cheese & how she wished she hadn't and it is VERY vomit inducing. As if the sight of her naked isn't enough.
I admit it...I'm addicted to TRHONY and usually watch NJ. I never really cottoned to the OC and Atlanta shows.
ReplyDeleteI think that look on Andy's face was because the song, although anemic and forgettable, wasn't that aural horror that Luann (the new female Barry White) did. Even autotune couldn't make her sound good and when someone has to talk some of the verses you know they're tone deaf!
I watch all of it, the shows, the Watch What Happens and the reunions. Kathy Griffin (love her!) was great and Rashida Jones was awesome when she was on WWH awhile back and did hilarious impressions of Kelly and Ramona. I love it when celebs admit that they are slumming with the rest of us who are fans of the RH shows.
1. not watching and don't care.
ReplyDelete2. gladys, WTF have you been? and lol!
3. rocketqueen, please, PLEASE don't every mix my tony up with this kind of trampiness again. kai?thx.
:)
sorry. must be the new bunny talking. i have no control.