Ted C Blind Item
Seymour Plow-Me-More is hardly in the closet. That is, if you live in L.A. Saying Seymour's gay is like saying Tom Cruise is super into Scientology. It's just a known fact.
So why, then, is SPMM, who happens to look rather fetching in a dress, still shy about his homosexual ways? After all, Plow hardly blushes when he propositions men for sexy time in bath houses. Plus, it's not even like Seymour has a red-hot career to worry about.
Thing is, coming out is über-complicated—as we assure you, outing himself isn't entirely Sey's decision alone. There are far too many people and companies relying on SPMM being this big macho Hollywood man (which we, and America, so aren't buying anymore).
Guess that's the only reason Mr. More is taking extra precautions:
Ritzy spas are hardly the only place Plow-Me-More likes to get his freak on. Just like any married skank in this town, Sey-babe hits the dirty-ass club scene to get his gay on, too.
Problemo is certain folks have Seymour occasionally concerned that people are watching his every friggin' move trying to out him. Like, duh. So what's a gay man with a legacy at stake to do? Well, SPMM made one particular club (since he's such a regular there) install an extra-special private door to give him more discreet in-and-out access...no pun intended.
We just don't know what to do anymore! 'Mour is so desperate to get out of his situation he has going on with the Missus, et al, he will just never do it himself, ultimately.
So, should we break our cardinal rule of no outing?
Seriously, if the fact that Seymour dresses up in drag (it's where he feels quite comfortable) during his alone time isn't a rainbow herring enough, we don't know what is. If it isn't gonna be us doing the dirty work, you bet it's gonna be someone else with a camera and mortgage ready to sell out old S.
We'll play nice for now and let Seymour Plow enjoy his time out of the spotlight. Dude's already been through enough. Unless you all disagree?
And It Ain't: Tom Cruise, Alec Baldwin, Tom Hanks
Hugh Jackman?
ReplyDeleteJohn Travolta, same guess as the last time Ted wrote about him.
ReplyDeleteDefinitely Travolta!
ReplyDeleteRobert Downey Jr.
ReplyDeleteVin Diesel or Kevin Spacey.
ReplyDeleteoh, yeah, I think Travolta. He was in drag for that play, and then the Scientology, married, same age frame as ain'ts, been through a lot (son). I think it is.
ReplyDeleteooh I love the Travolta guess. Downey still has a flourishing career.
ReplyDeleteYup. Jonny T.
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like Travolta, except for him being a macho man. That's the only thing that doen't fit. It needs to be someone with more macho roles, like Will Smith or Hugh Jackman. Jackman seems very happy with his relationship with his wfe, so I don't think it is him.It sounds like Travolta, except for him being a macho man. That's the only thing that doen't fit. It needs to be someone with more macho roles, like Will Smith or Hugh Jackman. Jackman seems very happy with his relationship with his wfe, so I don't think it is him.
ReplyDeletelutefisk, you don't think he's macho because you read gossip. My mom thinks he's macho, lol. Think about grease and some older movies...he was a "man's man" and hasn't he done some action movies? that one where he switched faces with Nic Cage?
ReplyDeletePoor John...just out with it already...if you come out, what's the worst Scientology can do...out you?
ReplyDeleteOh, John. I'm kind of surprised, I thought he wanted to stay in his marriage and was so deep in the Scientology closet that he wouldn't even think of coming out.
ReplyDeleteWhat about Tom Selleck? He was in that movie In and Out, which is statement used in the blind. Former macho guy, not really a blazing star anymore.
ReplyDeleteI don't think of Travolta as remotely macho. I just checked out IMDB and he barely does those sort of macho roles anymore anyway. It sounds more like Jackman to me. He could love his wife as a friend and appear to lover her romantically to the public, and still get his freak on behind closed doors. I have the same problem with Will Smith - don't think he's at all macho. He'll always be that skinny kid on the Fresh Prince to me.
ReplyDeleteTom Selleck. Huh. I think you're on to something, Makaveli.
ReplyDeleteI've been on the Travolta train with this one.
ReplyDeleteIt can't be Tom Selleck, he only sleeps around on his wife with me.
ReplyDeleteSelleck wouldn't look good in drag -- whereas Travolta has done a movie in drag and seemed to love it. Selleck doesn't have a lot of people depending on his reputation -- Travolta has the "church", his family, etc.
ReplyDeleteI don't get the need for anyone to "out" anyone else. It is self-serving to the person doing the outing. Frankly, I don't give a hang who is gay. However, the dressing up in drag makes for interesting gossip. That I think must be a hard secret to keep.
ReplyDeleteThe last Seymour Plow pointed towards Travolta and Cruise so if it ain't Cruise it is Travolta. I think Tom is Oiled Tush. The Blind Items Exposed girls do a good job of keeping up with Ted's blinds and nicknames but I haven't checked for updates.
ReplyDeleteRegarding Hugh Jackman, why can't there be a star named Hugh Jardon. I'm just wondering.
ReplyDeleteI want to say Travolta...but with the recent tragic loss of his son, I can't see him just up and leaving his wife to come out of the closet.
ReplyDeleteIf Tony Manero in Sat Night Fever isn't macho then nothing is. As much as I hate to agree this is Johnny to a "T". Everything fits. I am an Italian from NY and SNF is one of the best films ever. And he was nominated for Best Actor for it. I'm in the advertising/magazine biz and have heard him going the other way many times.
ReplyDeleteI don't know, Travolta was pretty macho in Pulp Fiction. Anyway, all the other Seymour blinds point to Travolta.
ReplyDeleteI think we're all off the mark here. I think it's got to be someone who is a huge name, but who has peaked even though they may still be making movies, just not as the hunky leading men that they once were. I also think it may be someone who is prominent in advertising products right now since Ted says there are "companies relying on SPMM being this big macho Hollywood man". I don't see being openly gay as a detriment to being a behind the camera guy like a producer or director.
ReplyDeleteI liked the Tom Selleck guess (his voice is in several commericals), but agree with Cindy, he would not look fetching in drag. Who is the spokesperson for some family and/or macho product?
Just thought of this. How about Harrison Ford? He and Calista aren't married but have lived together long enough to be commonlaw in some states. Plus, let's face it, there is no more of an all-American he-man hero than the iconic Indiana Jones. Han Solo and Jack Ryan are no slouches in the manly man area either. Those characters are franchises in many areas: movies, books, comic books, DVDs, and the extremely lucrative video game industry. I bet they make a lot of money for cable channels when the movies are shown on tv, too. But, I don't think he'd look to good in drag either.
ReplyDeleteAnd the more that I think about that last line "Dude's already been through enough. Unless you all disagree?" the more I lean toward Travolta. But what companies depend on Travolta's image?
The line, "Dude's already been through enough" is totally Travolta...I took that as his son's death.
ReplyDeleteCO$ is a company
ReplyDeleteDefinitely Travolta. I think Ted C. is at this weird place thinking outing him at this point would be more humane than what's going to happen when someone who isn't at least sympathetic to Travolta or gay is going to out him in a very tabloid-esque and/or humiliating way. Especially when Ted also thinks Travolta has wanted to be out for literally years if not decades.
ReplyDeletesure sounds like john revolting to me.
ReplyDelete"Dude's already been through enough."
ReplyDeleteDef Travolta...
Absolutely John Travolta. Looks good in a dress (Hairspray), macho man (harkening back to disco era a la Saturday Night Fever), and been through enough (his son's death).
ReplyDeleteTotally Travolta -- Breitling just started their new campaign in February. They're a swiss company?
ReplyDeleteI was thinking Kevin Spacey. I would like to think Ted would not be so open about outing Travolta becuase he has a child.
ReplyDeleteBut Kevin Spacey is common knowledge as being gay in NY & LA.
It is nobody's right to out anyone, and the fact that Ted would consider doing so makes him even more repugnant than I previously thought.
ReplyDeleteIt must be incredibly difficult to live a false live constructed for you by others, even if you were a willing participant. I hope whoever this is finds peace and is able to live an authentic life some day.
I think it's Vin Diesel
ReplyDeleteI like Spacey or Vin Diesel, but what do they advertise? I can't think of anything.
ReplyDelete