Money. Sex is waaaaay more fun, at least in a newer relationship. I don't want to share my finances so much, until I know whether I am interested in someone for the long term.
Excellent question. I don't find either particularly comfortable to discuss with other people, but I hate it when people try to be all Sex and The City and talk about their orgasms and different dicks they have encountered. Most of the time it just seems contrived, and that makes me uncomfortable and embarrassed, not the talking about sex in itself. Of course, most of my friends think I'm a prude because of it but the truth is, I think they sound stupid when they talk about sex and I don't want to sound like them. I don't love talking about money either but I don't find it that hard.
Ugh - talking about money stresses me out. Mostly because I don't have any. Also, asking for money - raises/discounts on bad service/etc - makes me feel like I'm going to faint.
On the other hand - I moonlight as a sex toy salesperson ... so, I'm definitely comfortable taking about sex. ;)
Depends on who you are talking to. If I'm talking to a very inept lover that I like for all his other attributes, it would be easier to discuss money. If I'm talking to the IRS, I'd rather talk about sex.
Sex. I am just sick to death of everyone everywhere running their mouths about sex, sex, SEX. Yes, we all have it, it's wonderful and fun, but for fuck's sakes can't we shut up about it for five fucking minutes?? I probably wouldn't have such an issue with it if it wasn't shoved down everyone's throats all the time...there is no place you can go where it isn't being relentlessly shoved in your face. You cannot turn on the TV, read a magazine, go shopping, do anything without being bombarded with sex. I never thought I was a prude, but I must be simply because I don't want to hear about your fisting/S&M/AB-DL fetishes, or whatever. It's gross, TMI and really not interesting to anyone other than you and whoever (or whatever) you're screwing. Oh, I'm also a prude because I don't want to talk to ANYONE about what goes on in my marriage...so basically I think sex is great, but it would be better if we had some mystery!
However, I also hate talking about money...it's so fucking BORING. I don't care how much money you make, have, spend on plastic trinkets for your McMansion, I am NOT interested. I think I'm just a weirdo though, and I'm sure all of you would be shocked (simply SHOCKED!!) to hear that I'm not a people person...LOL. The reason is obviously because I have nothing to talk about with anyone!!
Money. I wish I didn't even have to think about it. As far as sex goes, I'll talk about it, I'll do it, I just don't want to see it---like running, most people are either laughable or plain ugly while doing it. Give me Bette Davis and Paul Henreid sharing a cigarette over porn stars any day.
Money is an extremely touchy subject. I try to NEVER talk about it.
I agree with amanda rae, sex is overdiscussed. Talking about it too much really does take the sexy out of sex. Most people need to talk less sex with friends and acquaintances and more sex talk (real, factual talk) with their kids. Then maybe there would be fewer single teen moms. Kids today are drowning in sexual innuendo and starving for actual facts about both the act and its many, many possible consequences.
@ AJ - good luck, it will happen when you're ready.
And, Money, definitely. Although a girlfriend of mine told me a long time ago to never tell your girlfriends how good your man is in bed because they may be tempted to steal him. I don't like that kind of thinking, but I must admit I do follow that rule. But he is SO GOOD! ;)
I went to one of those sex toy parties once. It was pathetic. First of all, the hostesses (hosti?)/ sales people were mother and daughter. That was a little awkward. They were also both extremely fat and had mullets. And then the mom said that the reason she started selling sex toys was because she was using so many! *BARF*. And then everyone sat there trying to act like they were thuper open minded and thexual and not embarrassed, but they were really all kind of uptight chicks. They had made a penis cake but no one ate it. Yeah, it was a shitty party.
Both. Especially now that I'm remarried. No one needs to know I have more money than I ever have and that our sex is much more kinkier than anyone would expect.
The sex talk is seriously overdone, what happened to privacy? I don't care if you have to add $150 to your quarterly budget because you wear out your vibrator like its the end of the world.
My first statement makes me sound like a prude (which is far from it - especially 10 years ago.) Overall, I just feel people have lost their sense of privacy.
Wow, I'm surprised at everyone's answers. I find it does depend on the audience. In general, I don't mind discussing either with anyone. Who gives a shit how much money anyone makes? Not me. Who gives a shit what kind of sex you have? Not me.
But with my hubby, sex is impossible to discuss. Mainly because our sex life sucks (and always has) and I control the money (so there is no need for discussion). How do I discuss with my hubby how much sex with him sucks? I don't, that's how. I'm hoping I can live without hot sex. Please tell me I can. Six years and going strong.
For the record, hubby is my best friend in the world, and that's why I married him.
@SJ - I don't know how one would bring the topic up without someone getting upset, but if I were in your shoes (or bed as the case is) I would never mention that the current sex-life sucks - in any way! I would try to suggest doing "different" things as oppossed to saying "better" things. Know what I mean? Man-pride = fragile. Probably doesn't help, but good luck anyways :)
ps - A stong friendship is probably the only reason to marry anyone IMO, likely to be better times together than a shallow reason like good looks or a temporary reason like lust.
SJ, seduce your husband. Tell him you saw some dumb thing in Cosmo and wanted to give it a try. Anything that will open up dialogue with your best friend can only strengthen the relationship.
SJ - I know, I adore my husband, easily the sweetest, most generous man on the planet, I am told on a regular basis what a great guy he is, we don't have sex..nope, a few time before the wedding and then a few times a year, to once a year to once in two years..we hug, we kiss each other without passion, he is my best friend. Once in a while a bolt will hit me and I feel so lost and sad I cry, I remember what it was like to have a passion filled relationship and I wish so much it was different between us. I would never leave him, but sometimes I wonder what it would be like to be loved with passion. No one knows, because how can you begin to explain..no he's not gay or bi, just not interested in sex and after awhile you wonder if it's just me he's not interested in...money no problem I can talk about bonds, trusts, investments..but how much or how little I have not a chance..
If speaking with friends/close relatives - neither.
If speaking with a stranger - money. Maybe. I'm pretty open about most things. However, if you want to know my feelings about it, unless its something superficial, there's where the uncomfortableness comes in.
I can tell anyone just about anything....except how I feel about it. Does that make sense?
I can talk about all kinds of sex. Mine, or other peoples, straight or kinky. Legal or less than.
..but it will be a cold day in hell before I ask how much something cost, how much someone makes and it will be another cold day before I answer any questions about that.
Those are two of my favorite things to talk about, especially with my husband. But then we both are economics nerds, and our relationship is basically built on sex.
Money. Sex is waaaaay more fun, at least in a newer relationship. I don't want to share my finances so much, until I know whether I am interested in someone for the long term.
ReplyDeleteMoney-its a VERY touchy subject and can cause a lot of tension. Sex on the other hand is a tension reliever.
ReplyDeleteI tend to keep both to myself =)
ReplyDeleteSex, same reason as West End Girl.
ReplyDeleteI don't want to talk about it!
ReplyDeletemoney. sex is easy to talk about with most people. money is almost always hard.
ReplyDeleteMoney. Money. Money.
ReplyDeleteMoney!. Sex it's hard to talk about depending of the relationship status(parents,family,friends)
ReplyDeleteMoney. Or lack of.
ReplyDeleteI discuss sex with everyone on the planet. In fact the girls at the Starbucks by my house look forward to detailed accounting of my walk of shames.
ReplyDeleteMoney is private.
I third West End Girl.
ReplyDeleteSex, for me, because I'm gay and not "out".
ReplyDeleteSigh... someday!
Since I have to pay for sex, I always end up talking about both.
ReplyDeleteMoney! It is stressful and sex isn't!
ReplyDeleteMoney for me.
ReplyDeleteIt can depend on who I am discussing it with and what exactly I am discussing, also.
Excellent question. I don't find either particularly comfortable to discuss with other people, but I hate it when people try to be all Sex and The City and talk about their orgasms and different dicks they have encountered. Most of the time it just seems contrived, and that makes me uncomfortable and embarrassed, not the talking about sex in itself. Of course, most of my friends think I'm a prude because of it but the truth is, I think they sound stupid when they talk about sex and I don't want to sound like them. I don't love talking about money either but I don't find it that hard.
ReplyDeleteIT'S ALWAYS MONEY...WELL 80% OF THE TIME...MOST PEOPLE LOVE TO TALK ABOUT SEX...
ReplyDeleteUgh - talking about money stresses me out. Mostly because I don't have any.
ReplyDeleteAlso, asking for money - raises/discounts on bad service/etc - makes me feel like I'm going to faint.
On the other hand - I moonlight as a sex toy salesperson ... so, I'm definitely comfortable taking about sex. ;)
Depends on who you are talking to. If I'm talking to a very inept lover that I like for all his other attributes, it would be easier to discuss money. If I'm talking to the IRS, I'd rather talk about sex.
ReplyDeleteI do those parties, so talking about sex is a total piece of cake.
ReplyDeleteMoney. What do you want to know about sex?
ReplyDeleteMONEY.
ReplyDeleteSex. I am just sick to death of everyone everywhere running their mouths about sex, sex, SEX. Yes, we all have it, it's wonderful and fun, but for fuck's sakes can't we shut up about it for five fucking minutes?? I probably wouldn't have such an issue with it if it wasn't shoved down everyone's throats all the time...there is no place you can go where it isn't being relentlessly shoved in your face. You cannot turn on the TV, read a magazine, go shopping, do anything without being bombarded with sex. I never thought I was a prude, but I must be simply because I don't want to hear about your fisting/S&M/AB-DL fetishes, or whatever. It's gross, TMI and really not interesting to anyone other than you and whoever (or whatever) you're screwing. Oh, I'm also a prude because I don't want to talk to ANYONE about what goes on in my marriage...so basically I think sex is great, but it would be better if we had some mystery!
ReplyDeleteHowever, I also hate talking about money...it's so fucking BORING. I don't care how much money you make, have, spend on plastic trinkets for your McMansion, I am NOT interested. I think I'm just a weirdo though, and I'm sure all of you would be shocked (simply SHOCKED!!) to hear that I'm not a people person...LOL. The reason is obviously because I have nothing to talk about with anyone!!
Money!! I wil clam up and run/hide under a rock!!!
ReplyDeleteSex FOR money....lol!
ReplyDelete$$$. I am shameless when it comes to sex and have no hangups about it that I know of. I don't force the sex talk but I roll with it.
ReplyDelete-JAB-
Money. I wish I didn't even have to think about it. As far as sex goes, I'll talk about it, I'll do it, I just don't want to see it---like running, most people are either laughable or plain ugly while doing it. Give me Bette Davis and Paul Henreid sharing a cigarette over porn stars any day.
ReplyDeleteMoney. I get squirmy even thinking about it.
ReplyDeleteNot even close - money.
ReplyDeleteAlthough I actually talk freely about $ too, come to think of it.
ReplyDeleteMoney. Always. At least sex can be comical, money is always uncomfortable.
ReplyDeleteMoney is an extremely touchy subject. I try to NEVER talk about it.
ReplyDeleteI agree with amanda rae, sex is overdiscussed. Talking about it too much really does take the sexy out of sex. Most people need to talk less sex with friends and acquaintances and more sex talk (real, factual talk) with their kids. Then maybe there would be fewer single teen moms. Kids today are drowning in sexual innuendo and starving for actual facts about both the act and its many, many possible consequences.
Money....because I am terrible at it...er...managing it. LOL.
ReplyDeleteMoney because I don't have any.
ReplyDelete@ AJ - good luck, it will happen when you're ready.
ReplyDeleteAnd, Money, definitely. Although a girlfriend of mine told me a long time ago to never tell your girlfriends how good your man is in bed because they may be tempted to steal him. I don't like that kind of thinking, but I must admit I do follow that rule. But he is SO GOOD! ;)
Moolah for me.
ReplyDeleteI went to one of those sex toy parties once. It was pathetic. First of all, the hostesses (hosti?)/ sales people were mother and daughter. That was a little awkward. They were also both extremely fat and had mullets. And then the mom said that the reason she started selling sex toys was because she was using so many! *BARF*. And then everyone sat there trying to act like they were thuper open minded and thexual and not embarrassed, but they were really all kind of uptight chicks. They had made a penis cake but no one ate it. Yeah, it was a shitty party.
ReplyDeleteMoney.....Sex is the easy one to discuss....money gets messy
ReplyDeleteI guess what I'm trying to say is that I agree with amanda rae and RJ *LOL*
ReplyDeleteHarriet you had me at the matching mullets
ReplyDeleteOh gawd Money is a million times harder to discuss than sex!
ReplyDeleteHell even doing "the Talk" with my kids is easier than discussing money with my husband!
lol Harriet! That story is hilarious.
ReplyDeleteBoth. Especially now that I'm remarried. No one needs to know I have more money than I ever have and that our sex is much more kinkier than anyone would expect.
ReplyDeleteThe sex talk is seriously overdone, what happened to privacy? I don't care if you have to add $150 to your quarterly budget because you wear out your vibrator like its the end of the world.
My first statement makes me sound like a prude (which is far from it - especially 10 years ago.) Overall, I just feel people have lost their sense of privacy.
very funny Harriet! wish I was there!
ReplyDeleteMoney. (That's what I want)
ReplyDeleteMoney is boring to discuss. You either have some or you don't. What's there to talk about? I'll talk about both, but sex is much more fun
ReplyDeleteMoney.
ReplyDeleteI could talk about sex all day.
Well, since I am not getting any of either right now...I would say both. \
ReplyDeleteNeither. Blurt it out ffs.
ReplyDeleteDepends on who with but 9 times out of 10, money. But I don't wish to discuss sex with elders though esp if they are relatives.
ReplyDeleteMoney for sure.
ReplyDeleteWell, since I'm not getting one or the other, they both suck to discuss right now. Though hopefully that changes tonight. I need to go out.
ReplyDeleteBut usually, money. It's a tough topic. And also somewhat boring.
Muhla. Our fights about money is waaaay more intense than sex.
ReplyDeleteSex convo:
Me - listen honey, it's been a while...you wanna do it tonight?
Him - Hell yeah!
See?
I'd rather talk gossip.
ReplyDeletelol @ Bella
ReplyDeleteWow, I'm surprised at everyone's answers. I find it does depend on the audience. In general, I don't mind discussing either with anyone. Who gives a shit how much money anyone makes? Not me. Who gives a shit what kind of sex you have? Not me.
ReplyDeleteBut with my hubby, sex is impossible to discuss. Mainly because our sex life sucks (and always has) and I control the money (so there is no need for discussion). How do I discuss with my hubby how much sex with him sucks? I don't, that's how. I'm hoping I can live without hot sex. Please tell me I can. Six years and going strong.
For the record, hubby is my best friend in the world, and that's why I married him.
@SJ - I don't know how one would bring the topic up without someone getting upset, but if I were in your shoes (or bed as the case is) I would never mention that the current sex-life sucks - in any way! I would try to suggest doing "different" things as oppossed to saying "better" things. Know what I mean? Man-pride = fragile. Probably doesn't help, but good luck anyways :)
ReplyDeleteps - A stong friendship is probably the only reason to marry anyone IMO, likely to be better times together than a shallow reason like good looks or a temporary reason like lust.
Sex. I'm always bitching about my financial problems to anyone who will listen.
ReplyDeleteSJ, seduce your husband. Tell him you saw some dumb thing in Cosmo and wanted to give it a try. Anything that will open up dialogue with your best friend can only strengthen the relationship.
ReplyDeleteOh my God, MONEY ALL THE WAY.
ReplyDeleteSJ...lived it for almost 20 years. Then he went off with the much younger woman and now he is her problem. Suck it moon face.
ReplyDeleteSJ - I know, I adore my husband, easily the sweetest, most generous man on the planet, I am told on a regular basis what a great guy he is, we don't have sex..nope, a few time before the wedding and then a few times a year, to once a year to once in two years..we hug, we kiss each other without passion, he is my best friend. Once in a while a bolt will hit me and I feel so lost and sad I cry, I remember what it was like to have a passion filled relationship and I wish so much it was different between us. I would never leave him, but sometimes I wonder what it would be like to be loved with passion. No one knows, because how can you begin to explain..no he's not gay or bi, just not interested in sex and after awhile you wonder if it's just me he's not interested in...money no problem I can talk about bonds, trusts, investments..but how much or how little I have not a chance..
ReplyDeleteJealous of Lila! Remarried with money and kinky sex? Yes, please! Maybe someday...
ReplyDeleteBased what I have found out about my recently departed husband...BOTH.
ReplyDeleteIf speaking with friends/close relatives - neither.
ReplyDeleteIf speaking with a stranger - money. Maybe. I'm pretty open about most things. However, if you want to know my feelings about it, unless its something superficial, there's where the uncomfortableness comes in.
I can tell anyone just about anything....except how I feel about it. Does that make sense?
Money. I'm WAY more hung up about that than sex.
ReplyDeleteSex.
ReplyDeleteUnless it's the sex life of a celeb. Then it's open season.
MONEY.
ReplyDeleteI can talk about all kinds of sex. Mine, or other peoples, straight or kinky. Legal or less than.
..but it will be a cold day in hell before I ask how much something cost, how much someone makes and it will be another cold day before I answer any questions about that.
Money.
ReplyDeleteSex is hormonal, money is life.
Simple as that.
Those are two of my favorite things to talk about, especially with my husband. But then we both are economics nerds, and our relationship is basically built on sex.
ReplyDelete