Where Is A Police Helicopter When You Want One?

Yesterday afternoon I started seeing the reports of Naomi Campbell slapping and punching her driver in New York and just kind of went meh. It is Naomi Campbell. She hits, she screams, she punches and she wears couture for community service. Nothing ever really happens to her so she continues doing it. Apparently though Naomi freaked out after the driver of her car pulled over to get help from the police. Naomi took off running. I kept imagining Naomi running down the street in heels while yelling at her Russian boyfriend on the phone to help her. Meanwhile, as the news started reaching people they would hang out their windows yelling, "Run Naomi run."

Then I started to think about why Naomi would run. You and I both know that this is not the first time Naomi has hit someone. Hell, she hit a police officer and nothing happened. So why would she run? Maybe Naomi had something on her she should not have and was afraid the police might find it. It is a thought anyway.

Naomi still has not turned up, but no charges are going to be filed and no arrests will be made. One of her assistants took Naomi's place at the police station. You can do that when you are famous. Naomi's spokesperson says there is more than this than meets the eye. Uh huh. By my count she has been arrested or sued by about 12 different employees and one police woman for hitting them or throwing things at them. Oh, and this has happened in four separate countries so she certainly doesn't let borders dictate when and where she hits someone.