Jeez, what hath Jesse James wrought, huh? Are quasi-good-looking TV stars who behave badly suddenly the norm here in Hollywood?
Sure looks that way.
Because Moisty Mohr, a man never known for his looks so much as his ratings, is pulling some of the skuzziest stuff around these days! If you haven't just eaten lunch, proceed, by all means:
There's a certain store in town that sells women's clothing and is hot, hot, hot—tons of stars go there. It's a stylin' joint where the chicks go to get their chic on. So, of course, Moisty, who's always with one slinky babe or another (though he pretends he dates only one at a time—total lie), stopped into said shop recently.
"He came it with a bunch of gals," says an eyewitness. "They were just dripping all over him, which was really funny, as he's not all that much to look at."
What's even more hysterical (or pathetic, your choice) is that Moisty couldn't wait to have his way with his harem, so he took them into a changing room! And that area does not have floor-to-ceiling doors, mind you.
So, everybody in the store heard everything. And considering the fact that there were at least two women getting serviced by Moisty, the audio factor was not low. Consider it as amped as Mohr's boob-tube persona!
Wow. Is this like when short men start acting like total bitches, just to assert themselves? Dog-faced celeb finds the need to show he's got what it takes to please the ladies—and he wants everybody to know it?
Fine. Say the word, Moisty, your secret's out!
It Ain't: Jesse James, Jeremy Piven, George Lopez
Nathan Lane
ReplyDeleteThat bounty hunter guy ... Dog something?
ReplyDeleteCraig Furgeson?
ReplyDeleteJimmy Kimmel!!!
ReplyDeletedarn! george lopez was my first guess!
ReplyDeleteOhhhhhh... Anthony Bourdain who was played in Kitchen Confidential by another Ted-C obsession, Bradley Cooper. Nice.
ReplyDeleteI was thinking David Spade?
ReplyDeleteDavid Spade?
ReplyDeleteOooh David Spade is a good guess!
ReplyDeleteAnthony Bourdain? That guy is HOT.
ReplyDeleteWhat is David Spade on right now?
David Spade is on Rules of Engagement on CBS. Definitely think it is him.
ReplyDelete@A: Rules of Engagement
ReplyDeleteIs he talking about Kitson ?
ReplyDeleteCould it be as obvious as Jay Mohr on "Gary Unmarried"?
ReplyDeleteuck! Store Fred Segals?
ReplyDeleteThat explains why I didn't know David Spade was on TV. I don't think I've watched any shows on CBS in many years.
ReplyDeleteThe store sounds to me like Lisa Kline.
ReplyDeleteI was thinking it was the Frankie Muniz from Malcolm in the Middle.
David Spade
ReplyDeleteBret Michaels!
ReplyDeleteReeks of David Spade to me, glad to see GMTA here!
ReplyDeleteIt doesn't say the man in question is married. That would nix Jay Mohr, Dog the Bounty Hunter, and Nathan Lane (when was he ever on TV, btw?).
ReplyDeleteJeremy Piven was my first choice, but since it's definitely not him, I'm digging the David Spade guess.
David Spade
ReplyDeleteI kinda like Apple's guess.... little Frankie trying to be the "big man"?
ReplyDeleteI thought dog faced was a term sometimes used by soldiers. That made me think of ex-marine Drew Carey.
ReplyDeleteIs David Spade's character "amped"? I thought he always played that kind of droning low-key guy, and the hint is that his character is amped.
ReplyDeleteI don't think it's Munoz; this blind is "known for his ratings" and it all sounds like he's someone on TV now.
Boy, this one's got a lot of clues ... does he ever do reveals?
Tarrantino?
ReplyDeleteNathan Lane is GAY!!!
ReplyDeleteI thoroughly doubt that this is Anthony Bourdain. He's too handsome for this description and is simply not this kind of guy.
ReplyDeleteYawn. What's the big deal?
ReplyDelete@Katja
ReplyDeleteI'll bet the store is Trashy Lingerie. It's amazing and very popular with celebrities. I cannot understand why the staff let these fools carry on like that if this is true.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDelete@LetLoveRule- I LOVE Trashy Lingerie, just to go and look :) Wish I had a lot of $$$ to buy
ReplyDeleteI was thinking Bill Maher, too. He has a dog face (sorry, dogs) and is short to boot.
ReplyDeletePerhaps the man in question is associated with Sandra Bullock somehow because oddly all the "it ain'ts" are. Jesse is of course her husband; Sandra produced George Lopez's sitcom; and she and Jeremy Piven have the same birthday (I only know that because it's my birthday, too).
ReplyDeleteBourdain is tall, goodlooking and married.
ReplyDeleteDrew Carey ... solved
ReplyDeleteGlen Beck!!!1!!!
ReplyDeleteLarry King!!!
ReplyDelete@Bangagong
ReplyDeleteI'm impressed with your common denominator sleuthing. You've defiantely put some thought in to this. I am torn between what you said and the following theory.
Jimmy Kimmel
Jesse, Jeremy, Jimmy - all sound similar
George also has a late night talk show
What do you think?
@Lynne
ReplyDeleteOooh! I like your theory as well! Kimmel did have that Handsome man Club skit after the Oscars a few weeks ago. Did you catch it? He was thrown out for "not being handsome." That would certainly follow the theme of this post, wouldn't it? ;)