Here Is My Plan For Michael Lohan

I'm pretty much sick of the whole Michael and Dina Lohan thing. I can actually handle Lindsay because gossip that she is directly involved in is at least interesting. I mean who doesn't like to follow the exploits of a fallen actress who loves to steal, take drugs, is bi-sexual and can't spell. It's magic. What is not so magical are her parents. This is what I want. I want someone to give Michael 3 hours of uninterrupted time. I'm thinking Pay-Per-View. He gets three hours and can charge $4.95. In those three hours I want him to spill everything he has so we don't have to get it in dribs and drabs and see his ugly mesh shirt wearing face everyday. Bring out the home movies of Lindsay, the recorded phone calls, the proof of drug abuse and now his sex tape. Yep, apparently his ex-girlfriend and Michael made a sex tape. Well, God probably told him to do it. Anyway, he can rant and rave and bring out the ex and then she and Kate Major can have some type of wrestling match while Jon Gosselin referees. Then at the end of the show, Michael takes his check and walks away and we never ever hear from him again.